Girlfriend wants to go to the gym with me

**danato138** · 11-17-2009, 07:07 AM

So my girlfriend started to go to the gym with me. She wants me to make her a program and I'm not really sure how to get her started. She wants to get toned and build a little muscle. What would be the best exerciess to get her started with? I've been doing Rippetoes but I don't think thats going to be the best for her. Any advice would be appriciated

Thanks,
Dan

**medjen** · 11-17-2009, 07:10 AM

Originally Posted by danato138

So my girlfriend started to go to the gym with me. She wants me to make her a program and I'm not really sure how to get her started. She wants to get toned and build a little muscle. What would be the best exerciess to get her started with? I've been doing Rippetoes but I don't think thats going to be the best for her. Any advice would be appriciated

Thanks,
Dan

Why not? You're already ahead in that she wants to build muscle. If she's a total newbie, Starting Strength is as good a place to start as any. Let her do what you do.

"Get toned" doesn't exist. If she gets her diet in check and lifts heavy, she'll drop body fat and build muscle.

**-Lucifer** · 11-17-2009, 07:11 AM

Originally Posted by danato138

I've been doing Rippetoes but I don't think thats going to be the best for her.

Why not?

Put her on Rippetoe's program, that's fine.

**dcflex** · 11-17-2009, 07:11 AM

Originally Posted by danato138

So my girlfriend started to go to the gym with me. She wants me to make her a program and I'm not really sure how to get her started. She wants to get toned and build a little muscle. What would be the best exerciess to get her started with? I've been doing Rippetoes but I don't think thats going to be the best for her. Any advice would be appriciated

Thanks,
Dan

Always tough because you'll make her a program, she'll take one look at it and most likely say, "I don't want to get big."

But frankly, something like Rippetoes is the probably the perfect program paired with reasonable cardio and a better diet. Problem is learning to deadlift and squat correctly are likely to be pretty frustrating for her, especially if you're the one coaching her up.

Not to mention the only people in the gym she's likely to see squatting and/or deadlifting are large men (something she's deathly afraid of looking like).

Good luck. I've tried to get my wife on a program and she just ends up hiring a trainer that does boot camp style work outs.

**lamagic** · 11-17-2009, 07:15 AM

Starting Strength would be ideal. Good luck!

For me personally, the gym is my time and I wouldn't want to take my girlfriend with me. My girlfriend would keep interrupting my workout with questions or comments.

**mjw8204** · 11-17-2009, 07:23 AM

Ultimately the best thing to do for her is give her something effective that she will enjoy and will keep her coming back to the gym. When my girlfriend wanted to start coming with me there had to be some give and take as far as routine and exercise selection, but she works extremely hard and is easily the best workout partner I've ever had.

The worst thing you can do is take a hardcore, all-or-nothing attitude about what she should be doing. I realize training holds a more significant place in my life than my girlfriend's, and I'm okay with that. She is infinitely better off by coming with me than by doing nothing at all.

**KurtyJ99** · 11-17-2009, 07:25 AM

Originally Posted by danato138

So my girlfriend started to go to the gym with me. She wants me to make her a program and I'm not really sure how to get her started. She wants to get toned and build a little muscle. What would be the best exerciess to get her started with? I've been doing Rippetoes but I don't think thats going to be the best for her. Any advice would be appriciated

Thanks,
Dan

A little jogging, and some full body workouts.

Just show her how to use the machines, have her do them for a while and then after a few months show her free weights.

**Turco** · 11-17-2009, 07:33 AM

Full body routine, 2-3 times a week.

**CHAKUP** · 11-17-2009, 07:37 AM

Originally Posted by KurtyJ99

A little jogging, and some full body workouts.

Just show her how to use the machines, have her do them for a while and then after a few months show her free weights.

Get her into free weights, teach her right. Most girls, once they realise that you don't just get big, aren't as shy from real workouts.

**joen270** · 11-17-2009, 07:39 AM

I always thought that you train women the same as men. They are just going to do less weight.

**Defiant1** · 11-17-2009, 07:44 AM

knitting, washing dishes, ironing, doing laundry should all translate to faster and better meals especially game-day beer fetching and sammiches.

**Gary1911A1** · 11-17-2009, 10:36 AM

You might want to consider a female personal trainer she might respond to better.

**Omfgorzzz** · 11-17-2009, 10:57 AM

give her the basic compound lifts, covering all bodyparts. I would say for at least the first month of two do sets like 3x12-15. It will help build up some muscle memory and make her a lot more familier with the mechanics of the lift.

**grumble1** · 11-17-2009, 11:18 AM

A lot of girls have a seriously warped view of the effects of weight training on their body, thinking that by touching a dumbbell they're tun into a steroid freak. You should put her on SS, but you might consider maybe showing her some pictures of women who have successfully done the program and she can see the physical results for herself.

**SuicideGripMe** · 11-17-2009, 11:43 AM

Originally Posted by gordonrumble

A lot of girls have a seriously warped view of the effects of weight training on their body, thinking that by touching a dumbbell they're tun into a steroid freak. You should put her on SS, but you might consider maybe showing her some pictures of women who have successfully done the program and she can see the physical results for herself.

This! Girls think freeweights build Arnolds, and stability balls build Jessica Albas. Show her some of the girls who train at defrancos.

HOWEVER, on a bigger note. Why would you agree to this?! The gym is a mans one escape from everything. Id go so far as to say its my drug of choice. I wouldnt want my family or my girl to be there, even friends piss me off sometimes there. Just a thought man.

**lamagic** · 11-17-2009, 11:49 AM

Originally Posted by SuicideGripMe

HOWEVER, on a bigger note. Why would you agree to this?! The gym is a mans one escape from everything. Id go so far as to say its my drug of choice. I wouldnt want my family or my girl to be there, even friends piss me off sometimes there. Just a thought man.

^^^^ This!! Maybe you still have time to get out of taking her. For the first 6 months at my gym, the guys there thought I was a deaf mute. When I'm at the gym, for the next 45 to 70 mins, I'm at total peace.

**grumble1** · 11-17-2009, 12:11 PM

On the other hand, by taking his girl to the gym he can help her get a rocking physique. That'd be nice.

**WillGoesBoing** · 11-17-2009, 12:48 PM

I recently started helping my friend train. I made her do most of the compound exercises (squat, deadlift, bench, rows, assisted pull ups).

I would have to tell you though, most girls will be very reluctant to do these exercises because they keep thinking they're going to get too bulky.

I reassured her that it won't happen and to just trust me on it. So far she's doing great, and even though she is a regular at the gym she said she's been sore all over after our workouts; which is an indication that she's using muscles she's never used before. Just try it but have her start with the bar.

**Gdogs727** · 11-17-2009, 12:53 PM

You can try all pros a simple beginners routine if not SS

**danato138** · 11-17-2009, 07:25 PM

Thanks for all the replies guys. Yeah I'm kind of torn with her going to the gym with me. I really like being by myself when I'm there. I put on my headphones and kinda zone out the whole time, but she really wants to do this and it's something we can do together. I might just start her on SS. She kept saying that she didn't want to look as big as me though (I'm not that big at all) so I keep assuring her that she won't because she's not eating like I am. Another problem is she used to have an eating disorder so I have to watch her a little carefully. Years ago she used to go to the gym and be on the cardio equip for hours.

**Ironlife** · 11-17-2009, 07:31 PM

I wouldnt put my clients on ripptoes if they wanted to get ' toned and a little more muscle'
This program is probably the furthest thing from what should be advised lol..

3 times a week full body workouts incorporating upper lower body with core training and in those 3 sessions 1 of them cardio based. rep ranges 10-20

**J_Bo** · 11-17-2009, 08:44 PM

If women do the same programs as men, they will get "toned and a little muscular"... Men kill themselves to try to get big, and a many still fail...and we're testosterone facoties made to build muscle. A woman without a man's hormonal profile who is not eating a surpluss of calories will not get big and bulky. With lifitng, either you're building muscle or your not. So have them do a regular program to build muscle and then do cardio for bodyfat...there's no such thing as lifting for "tone"

**ericzimmerman34** · 11-17-2009, 08:59 PM

I wouldnt have her do ripptoes starting off. If shes a complete newbie she probably wont be able to do a pull up and exercises such as the squat would be to advanced for her and could be dangerous (If you do it have her do lunges and/or leg press). Also ripptoes is a program for strength. She should start of light with higher reps to get her muscles, nervous system, joints, ligaments, and tendons etc. ready. The total weight lifted might be the same (heavy weight low reps compared to low wieght and hight reps) but with the lower weight and high reps shes less likely to become injured and can get her form down much easier.

just my opinion however

**kimm4** · 11-17-2009, 09:07 PM

Get her started with full body workouts. I think this is the best route to get her familiar with the equipment, weights and different exercises. Once she becomes more comfortable around the weight room, then she can switch over to split workouts if she wants to.

Def show her compound lifts squats, deads, bench, etc...

Women need to train the same as men, it's no different.

**GuyJin** · 11-17-2009, 10:07 PM

Take her with you. Love will keep you together (Think "Captain and Tennille.")

Seriously, there's no reason why she can't do the same stuff as a guy; as someone said, she'll just be doing less weight. (If she outsquats you the first time, though, ditch her!). Get her on a full-body programme to start with, emphasizing squats or lunges, some lower back work, low-inclines for chest, pulldowns, stomach work a.k.a. "Teh Core" and some other basic stuff. It odesn't have to be Starting Strength, although there's nothing wrong with it. (She could always up the reps if she thinks 5's are too low). If she had an eating disorder, now is the time to (gently) educate her about eating properly; you're doing it, and she can learn from you.

All the training ain't going to make her look like a female Wolverine so she doesn't have to worry; she'll just look hotter than usual. Just my two yen...

**princessTiffany** · 11-18-2009, 12:22 AM

SS is fine. Tell her there's no way in hell she'll ever get big and if you must use that dreaded word "tone". (there's no such thing as toning but SS will give her a "toned" appearance).

**laxer32** · 11-18-2009, 06:31 AM

Originally Posted by gordonrumble

but you might consider maybe showing her some pictures of women who have successfully done the program and she can see the physical results for herself.

Very slippery slope with this.... can either co what you inted or make her feel insecure/you don't think she looks good enough because she doesn't look like the photos

Procede with caution.

**obesebeast** · 11-18-2009, 09:09 AM

i'd just have her dead lift, leg curl, good mornings and only let her ride the stair stepper, build up that booty!

but seriously, girls aren't going to get huge from lifting, they just don't have the available testosterone to do so, a slight increase, but nothing extraordinary without some sort of outside assistance or disorder...i've trained with an amateur fitness model and while she's muscular, she's no where near vascular, manly, anything that would say she looks manly

**rodgovin** · 11-18-2009, 09:40 AM

Thats great that your galfriend wants to start going to d gym. Just don't turn into her personal trainer..lol. Let her learn from some of her experiences....will make it much more interesting for her.

**obesebeast** · 11-18-2009, 11:15 AM

yea cause the guy doing bicep curls in the rack is any better

gives me something to look at....use that rack girls, while i stare at yours

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