ALCOHOLICS: RECOVERY & FITNESS (Serious Only Please)

[wolfpack7483]

I heard a great saying yesterday that I had never heard before that I thought fit recovery to a T: "I've had enough cheese; now I just want out of the trap." LOL

That's a really great one! Thanks.

[cowboybiker]

Ladies and Gentlemen.
Boys and Girls.
Children of all ages.
As of today I am celebrating 12 years clean and sober.
That includes weekends and holidays
My clean date is 9-9-99
Its not about numerology.
Just couldnt find any dope that day and decided it was time to go to rehab.
Of course I was court mandated for a year. They gave me 30 days to get into one.
Truth is, at the time, I didnt even know what year it was.
I just knew it was time.
Sometimes that moment of clarity kicks in real strong.
And theres no denying it.
So to celebrate I will be speaking at a rehab tonite of about 100 men. Stagg meeting.
And tomorrow I,ve been asked to speak at another big meeting that should have 3 different rehabs there and various others to listen to little ol' me
I want to thank you all for being a part of my recovery.


steve

[Twineagles]

Ladies and Gentlemen.
Boys and Girls.
Children of all ages.
As of today I am celebrating 12 years clean and sober.

steve

Steve, congratulations on an outstanding clean time and all the hard work it takes to get there. Its great to have you here with your experience and perspective. We all benefit from your presence. all the best, mike

[chodan9]

Awesome cowboybiker
you are certainly an inspiration to me and many others here.

[thepowerwithin]

As of today I am celebrating 12 years clean and sober.

Congratulations!! That's big . Thanks for sharing ITT. You have no idea how much you help me.

[dogetta]

Congratulations!

[GirLInterrupted]

Wow Steve, congrats! I bet you'll really enjoy your meetings this weekend! I know it means a lot to the rehabers!

[muttytwist]

Congrats, Steve, 12 years is a big milelarker. Hope at least a few took the message home from those meetings.

[wolfpack7483]

Congratulation Cowboy, and to your Higher Power and the program of Alcoholics Anonymous for staying sober 12 years one day at a time! Grateful for you and our little sober corner of BB.com. Always a bright spot in my day!

[GirLInterrupted]

I'll start with... I am going to a meeting tonight. Lately I have been thinking that I can't see myself NEVER drinking again. Like it's just who I am. I've been drinking for 26 years and pretty heavily. I've been in rehab a handful of times, even with a famous jackass once
However, I just wonder. I guess I'm looking too far ahead? Looking at the forever thing instead of just today? Maybe that is my problem.
Like I'm looking at Christmas. My husband and I love to sit by the fire in front of the Christmas tree with eggnog. I only like the alcoholic kind, go figure. I love how I'm feeling now, no hangovers, starting to clear up the cobwebs in my head. Things are going so great.

I guess I need to keep alive what my life was like and how I was feeling when I did drink. I was talking to my hubby today and brought this up. He said "yeah, would be nice, but you never seem to be able to just keep it at a few drinks and then it goes haywire from there" this is so true. I start out being pretty good, you know weekends and stuff. Then full on benders. I guess I am answering my own questions here, but what keeps that stuff alive for you guys? How do you remember what it was like and not let your alcoholic brains trick you into forgetting the bad and glorifying the good???

xoxo

[chodan9]

GI
The first couple years it required lots of time with the program (12 steps) and meetings, also hitting my knees every morning asking God for the strength to live clean and sober that day (I still do that every day). But to be honest the thought of drinking or using has not crossed my mind in over 20 years, the obsession (what your feeling the remnants of now) has been lifted.

[GirLInterrupted]

That's good to hear. I think it usually gets better with each day. At first each day was brutal. Usually on the way home from work I have this whole conversation with myself about buying booze, how much I'll drink, tonight I'll be able to limit it to two drinks. Now those thoughts do not hit my mind on the way home from work.

I actually had my first drinking dream last night. That was very strange and waking up sober was awesome and relieving.

Driving to the tanning salon this morning (yes I'm very vain ) I was thinking how nice it was to get there when the store opened and to have been up and cheery and not hung over. I was really enjoying and appreciating the feeling.

Then my stupid head goes to wondering if I really can do this forever. I can manipulate the crap out of myself, it's scary. Thanks chodan

[chodan9]

Driving to the tanning salon this morning (yes I'm very vain )

same here

Thanks chodan

any time!

[GreenWave1]

Ladies and Gentlemen.
Boys and Girls.
Children of all ages.
As of today I am celebrating 12 years clean and sober.
That includes weekends and holidays
My clean date is 9-9-99
Its not about numerology.
Just couldnt find any dope that day and decided it was time to go to rehab.
Of course I was court mandated for a year. They gave me 30 days to get into one.
Truth is, at the time, I didnt even know what year it was.
I just knew it was time.
Sometimes that moment of clarity kicks in real strong.
And theres no denying it.
So to celebrate I will be speaking at a rehab tonite of about 100 men. Stagg meeting.
And tomorrow I,ve been asked to speak at another big meeting that should have 3 different rehabs there and various others to listen to little ol' me
I want to thank you all for being a part of my recovery.


steve

Congratulations! You have come so far. You inspire all of us. Thank you.

[GreenWave1]

Beth, you talk about not being able to imagine never drinking again. You look forward and can't imagine a sober Christmas. I urge you to only look at today. If that is hard, then look at right now. You are still learning how to be sober. It is a different way of life. You can do this. Learn to live this way, and you will wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

[cowboybiker]

Thanks everyone.
I was the lead speaker tonite and had to share for an hour.
To long for me and I pulled a muscle doing deads today so I was sore the whole time.
I hope someone got something out of the message.
Im told that if I can reach one person than I did something good.
I just feel that it sucked cause Im in so much pain.
But I thank you ALL for you congrats and well wishes.
You are inspiring to me

[boathead]

way to go, steve. you have a fine message, that's for certain. much respect.

[thepowerwithin]

I'll start with... I am going to a meeting tonight. Lately I have been thinking that I can't see myself NEVER drinking again. Like it's just who I am. I've been drinking for 26 years and pretty heavily. I've been in rehab a handful of times, even with a famous jackass once
However, I just wonder. I guess I'm looking too far ahead? Looking at the forever thing instead of just today? Maybe that is my problem.
Like I'm looking at Christmas. My husband and I love to sit by the fire in front of the Christmas tree with eggnog. I only like the alcoholic kind, go figure. I love how I'm feeling now, no hangovers, starting to clear up the cobwebs in my head. Things are going so great.

I guess I need to keep alive what my life was like and how I was feeling when I did drink. I was talking to my hubby today and brought this up. He said "yeah, would be nice, but you never seem to be able to just keep it at a few drinks and then it goes haywire from there" this is so true. I start out being pretty good, you know weekends and stuff. Then full on benders. I guess I am answering my own questions here, but what keeps that stuff alive for you guys? How do you remember what it was like and not let your alcoholic brains trick you into forgetting the bad and glorifying the good???

xoxo

I cannot recall having cravings or being overwhelmed by the thought of never drinking again. I was pretty much done and never looked back. Step One was pretty easy for me. I had tried to control my drinking and failed miserably with each attempt. My only option was to get sober and stay sober.

THIS IS HOW I KEEP IT ALIVE:

At the end, I was drinking pretty much round the clock, waking up in the middle of the night, shaking in the morning until I got my fix, hiding bottles throughout my house, liquor store hopping so as not to be recognized, driving under the influence (sometimes my kids were in the car - SHAME!), my car had dents and scrapes from "close calls", passing out, blacking out, pissing myself, liver enzymes were out of whack, finances were a mess, my kids looked at me with disappointment, I embarrassed them.....the list goes on.

I was on the verge of losing everything that meant something to me; my kids, my job, my house, my liver. No drink was worth that.

Yeah, I am done. Thank God.

[JasonDB]

I'm not an alcoholic (I do not drink), but my father became one within the last 10 years (my mother would not allow him to drink while she was alive... he started up when she died)... and pushed me completely out of his life after doing so and I have watched his self-destructive downward spiral... and my ex-wife was one... her drunk driving and coming home intoxicated and throwing up all over the bathroom and picking fights with me that she denied starting the next day, were definitely high on the list of reasons we divorced (she is currently on probation for her 2nd DWI I recently heard). I've also lost two friends in my lifetime to drunk drivers.

I've seen first hand how negatively alcoholism can be in the lives of those who drink to excess, and to their friends and families... and sometimes to innocent bystanders. For those of you in this thread who have made the choice to stop allowing alcohol to destroy yourself and those you care about, you have made one of the most important choices of your life, and I applaud you.

[GirLInterrupted]

I cannot recall having cravings or being overwhelmed by the thought of never drinking again. I was pretty much done and never looked back. Step One was pretty easy for me. I had tried to control my drinking and failed miserably with each attempt. My only option was to get sober and stay sober.

THIS IS HOW I KEEP IT ALIVE:

At the end, I was drinking pretty much round the clock, waking up in the middle of the night, shaking in the morning until I got my fix, hiding bottles throughout my house, liquor store hopping so as not to be recognized, driving under the influence (sometimes my kids were in the car - SHAME!), my car had dents and scrapes from "close calls", passing out, blacking out, pissing myself, liver enzymes were out of whack, finances were a mess, my kids looked at me with disappointment, I embarrassed them.....the list goes on.

I was on the verge of losing everything that meant something to me; my kids, my job, my house, my liver. No drink was worth that.

Yeah, I am done. Thank God.

I think that's part of my problem. I don't find that my life was unmanageable. I have a really great career, worked my way up over the past five years from entry level supervisor to a promotion to VP that is right around the corner. Great relationship with my kids and family. Nice house, car, friends, hobbies, kids sports.... I did do stupid things and had trouble stopping once I started. I had benders where I would wake up and drink in the middle of the night and in the morning. I just listen to other people's stories and think I wasn't so bad. I had as many enjoyable drinking experiences as unenjoyable ones. I guess that is what is making it so hard for me. How sick does this sound, just wish there was a way to learn to control it. I have an ED too, and you are forced to learn to control that. You can't just quit eating, so you have to learn to eat normally. It is sooooo hard. Could you imagine if you HAD to drink every day to survive but just drink 3 drinks over the course of a day? So..... if you can control one addiction, why not the other?

Today, I feel good about being sober. Today I will be sober. I'm just going to worry about today. Tomorrow I'll worry about tomorrow

[Meatpants]

Been a bit busy lately, so I am late to the party. Congrats Steve!

[vindex1963]

Ladies and Gentlemen.
Boys and Girls.
Children of all ages.
As of today I am celebrating 12 years clean and sober.
That includes weekends and holidays
My clean date is 9-9-99
Its not about numerology.
Just couldnt find any dope that day and decided it was time to go to rehab.
Of course I was court mandated for a year. They gave me 30 days to get into one.
Truth is, at the time, I didnt even know what year it was.
I just knew it was time.
Sometimes that moment of clarity kicks in real strong.
And theres no denying it.
So to celebrate I will be speaking at a rehab tonite of about 100 men. Stagg meeting.
And tomorrow I,ve been asked to speak at another big meeting that should have 3 different rehabs there and various others to listen to little ol' me
I want to thank you all for being a part of my recovery.


steve

Steve man a dozen years!!!!! Congrats my brother.

[Frankie75]

I just found this thread recently. I've read alot of great stories and would like to say congratulations to all that have stayed sober for many years. It's been a struggle for me last few years when i decided to quit for good, always tried to do it myself without any support and ended up being worse. Last year went to AA for a few meetings but didn't really like it and felt ashamed to go back after drinking again. After reading a few of the posts here I decided to go back this week and give it another try. Maybe go to another location or another time. Stopped this year on July 11 so 2 months sober.

[muttytwist]

I just found this thread recently. I've read alot of great stories and would like to say congratulations to all that have stayed sober for many years. It's been a struggle for me last few years when i decided to quit for good, always tried to do it myself without any support and ended up being worse. Last year went to AA for a few meetings but didn't really like it and felt ashamed to go back after drinking again. After reading a few of the posts here I decided to go back this week and give it another try. Maybe go to another location or another time. Stopped this year on July 11 so 2 months sober.

Welcome to the thread, and congrats on 2 months. Hit as many meetins as you need, and don't feel ashamed, everyone has set backs.

[GirLInterrupted]

I just found this thread recently. I've read alot of great stories and would like to say congratulations to all that have stayed sober for many years. It's been a struggle for me last few years when i decided to quit for good, always tried to do it myself without any support and ended up being worse. Last year went to AA for a few meetings but didn't really like it and felt ashamed to go back after drinking again. After reading a few of the posts here I decided to go back this week and give it another try. Maybe go to another location or another time. Stopped this year on July 11 so 2 months sober.

I'm one of those don't really like it folks, but I can tell you this, you never have to be embarrassed to go back in. What a great group of people in the rooms! Probably one of the only places on the planet that I don't feel judged. I would say the majority of them have made a few comebacks themselves.

Congrats on your 2 months! Whoot! That really is a huge accomplishment

[thepowerwithin]

I just found this thread recently. I've read alot of great stories and would like to say congratulations to all that have stayed sober for many years. It's been a struggle for me last few years when i decided to quit for good, always tried to do it myself without any support and ended up being worse. Last year went to AA for a few meetings but didn't really like it and felt ashamed to go back after drinking again. After reading a few of the posts here I decided to go back this week and give it another try. Maybe go to another location or another time. Stopped this year on July 11 so 2 months sober.

Every time I see someone walk back into the rooms of AA after relapsing and sharing about it, I admire them because of their honesty and humility. In our group, that person truly becomes the most important person in the room and we tend to focus our sharing on what we think will help them. This is how I was received after my relapse, too. Did not feel judged one iota.

I can't go at it alone either. Been there, done that, didn't work.

Congrats on your 2 months.

[Twineagles]

Beth, When I first started thinking about getting clean, I couldn't bear that thought of life without meth. Meth was my best friend but it was killing me. Then one night one of the young members of my group (and he has 13 years) carefully explained that that the thought of living without drugs, even now, overwhelms him, and that the only way he can stay clean is to just not use today. He said he has done this for 13 years, put it off to tomorrow, and as we all know, tomorrow never comes. You can do this and you are doing this. Thanks for being here. We arell draw strength from your hard work. mike

[vindex1963]

Every time I see someone walk back into the rooms of AA after relapsing and sharing about it, I admire them because of their honesty and humility. In our group, that person truly becomes the most important person in the room and we tend to focus our sharing on what we think will help them. This is how I was received after my relapse, too. Did not feel judged one iota.

I can't go at it alone either. Been there, done that, didn't work.

Congrats on your 2 months.

Amen to that. You can feel the pain they're in.

[Frankie75]

^^^Thanks for all the replies. I will try and go to as many meetings as i can and not try to do this on my own again.

[cowboybiker]

^^^Thanks for all the replies. I will try and go to as many meetings as i can and not try to do this on my own again.

First off. Congrats on 60 days. Thats an accomplishment. You should be proud.
And secondly let me explain H.O.W.
Honesty
Openmindedness
Willingness
The big book says with these we are well on are way.
With honesty we need to be honest with ourselves. We can no longer tell ourselves that our drinking/using is not hurting anyone or the lie that we can control it.
We're beyond that point. so admit. step 1. and be honest with others.
Openmindedness is to realize that our way is not working and that we are still teachable and can take advice and learn from others. Not just there mistakes, but there triumphs as well. If a program is working for countless others, good chance it can work for you.
Willingness, sounds easy enough. Willing to change, willing to take advice, willing to help others, willing to accept help from others.
The only opstacle there would be pride. They say pride comes before the fall. What will you do to keep your pride from killing you?
Im not just singling you out. Many will read this and not respond. So im hoping I will reach them as well.
Once again congratulations on the decision you have made to change your life. Hope nothing but the best.


steve