Distant and unresponsive girlfriend

[therealthedong]

Her response.

"yes it's because I don't want to talk about it. I'm feeling pretty low right now and I'm staying away because I don't want you to feel the same. I'm not fun to be around at the minute"

I did sense some sort of depression or anxiety. I don't know how best to approach this.

Don't listen to other guys that she is actually banging other guys, but I'm willing to bet her ex husband is back in the picture and possibly trying to win her back...

Best bet is to be cool and nice... then go no contact.

[PowersKenny]

If I have responsed to another stupid threads...I'm going to **** your girlfriend

[AndroMuscle]

I've not made any contact with her today, it's usually me who texts first. Sure enough, just had a text saying she loves me.

Exactly and now you go in for the kill and say when can i see you!

[CT2018]

Beginning to question whether NC actually works with a girlfriend as compared to a girl your trying to pick up.

Been over a week and still not getting anywhere with this girl. Starting to think if I should break it off with her, the head **** is wracking my brain. Really like this girl too, could have been something long term there.

How's the best way to let her down??

[AndroMuscle]

Hey dude! i would just leave it cold. Maybe some day she will text you again..?

[kingof_queens]

Beginning to question whether NC actually works with a girlfriend as compared to a girl your trying to pick up.

Been over a week and still not getting anywhere with this girl. Starting to think if I should break it off with her, the head **** is wracking my brain. Really like this girl too, could have been something long term there.

How's the best way to let her down??

She wouldn't be doing this if she cared about your relationship, it's that simple. All those excuses she's giving you are BS

Have some self respect and start moving on bro, it sucks but there is nothing you can say or do to save it. Starting today, right now, move on. Focus on improving yourself, find your balls, and start talking to new girls

[CT2018]

She wouldn't be doing this if she cared about your relationship, it's that simple. All those excuses she's giving you are BS

Have some self respect and start moving on bro, it sucks but there is nothing you can say or do to save it. Starting today, right now, move on. Focus on improving yourself, find your balls, and start talking to new girls

Needed that. Do I be honest and break up with her?

[kingof_queens]

Needed that. Do I be honest and break up with her?

If you respect yourself, yes

99.100% chance this is happening because there's another dude involved, in one way or another. Like I said, it simply comes down to this, if she cared about your relationship she wouldn't be behaving like this, even if she was "depressed"

But do it like a man. No emotional or unnecessary bullsh*t. Keep it short and sweet. It'll suck for a bit, but how bad it'll suck will be up to you and your attitude about it. Focus on improving yourself, it'll help you move on

Good luck bro

[CT2018]

Called and dropped the bombshell.

Then get this text just.

"Yeah and I was going to talk to you this week about what’s been going on. After you called me the other night I sat there with *her mate, name* and ****ing cried for ages because I’ve pushed you away. Guess I pushed too far."

[CT2018]

Totally regretting it now. I'm a ****ing wuss.

[Meralus]

Totally regretting it now. I'm a ****ing wuss.

Keep you head up, brah. Plenty more opportunities and chances in life.

[Custo]

Called and dropped the bombshell.

Then get this text just.

"Yeah and I was going to talk to you this week about what’s been going on. After you called me the other night I sat there with *her mate, name* and ****ing cried for ages because I’ve pushed you away. Guess I pushed too far."

what a cop out,... and i was going to talk to you!!!! no she wasn't.
I pushed you away and was really upset about it... but kept doing it. Just think about this man. Her actions and words don't match.

[BetaThanU]

Her response.

"yes it's because I don't want to talk about it. I'm feeling pretty low right now and I'm staying away because I don't want you to feel the same. I'm not fun to be around at the minute"

I did sense some sort of depression or anxiety. I don't know how best to approach this.

its complete horsechit. move on its over. try and salvage some dignity.

you just hit the three month wall, always happens to me.

[BetaThanU]

Called and dropped the bombshell.

Then get this text just.

"Yeah and I was going to talk to you this week about what’s been going on. After you called me the other night I sat there with *her mate, name* and ****ing cried for ages because I’ve pushed you away. Guess I pushed too far."

you just gave her what she wanted and now she's feigning regret...'oh no what have i done, oh well cya!'

[kingof_queens]

Totally regretting it now. I'm a ****ing wuss.

Don't regret it. She didn't care about you, you were patient, you expressed your concerns, nothing changed, so you did what any self respecting man would do. It's her loss man, not yours

what a cop out,... and i was going to talk to you!!!! no she wasn't.
I pushed you away and was really upset about it... but kept doing it. Just think about this man. Her actions and words don't match.

Exactly

[kingof_queens]

Think about it this way. This entire time she figured she could do or treat you any way she wants and that you will not have the balls to do anything about it. Doesn't that piss you off? You did what needed to be done and you should be proud of it, you should be proud of respecting yourself and taking control of your life, that is what being a man is about

[kingHanley]

Girls always say they were just about to blah blah blah when you break up with them lol

[CT2018]

Thanks for the "pick me ups"!! Last night was tough a won't lie, I hardly slept. I've got a strong sense of guilt at the moment, part of me think she has serious depression problems, in hindsight she did display a lost of the symptoms. The other side of my thinks like the above posts I did the right thing getting out as she didn't display any regard for my feelings with the way she was behaving.

Contact has been very little since yesterday. I replied to her last message by saying she needs no talk to me, to which the reply was 'what's the point anymore'

Going to keep myself and my mind busy. Off to the gym shortly.

[CT2018]

So I've been to the gym and decided to pop to my local for a few beers, in the hope I can have a better sleep. Not good alcohol after the gym I know!! Was in bed 10 hours last night, probably slept 2!!

[kingof_queens]

..... to which the reply was 'what's the point anymore'

She's saying that because she doesn't care

No contact

[phatwebbos]

I'm coming into this late but it is super clear you guys were both in a rebound relationship. I had a similar experience and i'm telling you, you were both trying to fill a void left by your ex's cheating on you by rushing into a relationship with the first person you hit it off. She could have been distant because she realized how fast you guys were moving after a marriage. There could have been another guy but probably not. You guys needed to be alone and learn about yourself all over again. I've been there, married, cheated on, no self esteem no confidence. Relayed heavily on the next girl to boost my confidence and replace the emotional damaged my ex caused and rushed into a relationship that I knew was a dead end and kept trying to keep it alive until it finally died.

[Exaw]

Lol this is how one of my ex's was acting around the time she broke up with me. She apparently wanted ME to break up with her.

[CT2018]

Ok she finally come clean with me. She's in a bad way financially. 20k in debt!! Cards, loan and overdraft. Basically more money going out than coming in every month. Single parent living with her own home and a ex who is not pulling his weight.

She said she was pushing me because she didnt want to drag me down with her.

Meeting up for lunch later. Not sure how to play this one.

[AndroMuscle]

She has you bad man, like Usher.

[Brandan1997]

Ok she finally come clean with me. She's in a bad way financially. 20k in debt!! Cards, loan and overdraft. Basically more money going out than coming in every month. Single parent living with her own home and a ex who is not pulling his weight.

She said she was pushing me because she didnt want to drag me down with her.

Meeting up for lunch later. Not sure how to play this one.

lmaoooooooo OP if you give her a single penny I will neg you to infinity and beyond. Shes not your problem anymore and if shes in debt because her ex husband wouldnt pull his weight then thats on them. Dont let them drag you down too. I wouldnt even go on lunch with her but if thats what you need for closure then make this the last time and end it on your terms. Dont let her get in your head and feed you bs

[CrimsonSteel]

Again my demons kicked in and I said to her she's changed since the girl I first met and I was frustrated at not seeing her, I also told her I was feeling insecure that she might be cheating on me and I was getting quite depressed about the way things were working out. I also said "what are you looking for from this" which she responded that "are you really asking this" Looking back when I sobered up the next day I know it was the worst thing I could have said. This happened about a week ago. We've not met up since but we've been messaging and she still says she loves me, but still acts quite distant.

Last night I messaged her asking if I had done anything to upset her to which she said no and that she's just tired (she sleeps a lot). I said something has changed between us, and if there's any problems she is going through, I hope she feels like she can talk to me, also saying that i want her to be happy. She responded by saying "she doesn't want to talk about it" I said fine but I'm here to support her if she does and that I'm worried about her.

God damn, man. You really fukked this one up severely. You were basically rewarding her for her sh!t behavior in the neediest ways possible. Which caused her to detest you. She's dryer than a desert in a drought, bro. It's a turn off for most women when a guy is a push-over.

I've bit the bullet and put the cards on. Can't be arsed with mind games, rather be open. If things aren't working out time to cut loses and be honest.

Rightly or wrongly. Thanks for all the advice above. It's been wrecking my brain and emotions. I'd rather know where I stand. I know it's over but this is what I've said.

"Sorry bab but I've got to be open with you and say I'm worried about you and us. I've noticed a change in you the last 3 weeks, you've become more and more distant. I know you've been bad but I also sense something else is up. You said the other night there's something you don't want to talk about?? I wish you could be open with me. I really like what we have going on. It's right we have some space between us to do our own thing with our own friends, it's healthy for any relationship. But I just never seem to see you and you never seem interested in meeting up anymore"

You can put the cards on the table without being a total b!tch about it. Where's your balls, man? Holy fuk. Must be a troll. "Sorry bab."

EDIT: Just saw how she "came clean" about her 20k in debt, and living with her ex. If you don't mind essentially renting her, go for it. But that there is just hiring a whore. Who lives with her ex. Does he watch you fuk her from the corner in his bathrobe?

[Nicklol]

exact same **** happend to me..

she would text to me all day everyday
say sht like : " I missssss youuuuu <3, can I come over after work!?"

then one day she didnt for the whole day and I said whats going on? and she responded super late "im just tired"
all day?
then she would say weird sht to me like "I am tired of being used by guys, like I just am there to suck their dicks"
and I said "what? you dont think about me like that right"? and I told her all the reasons I like her and how I like her smile and appreciate the things shes done for me etc and?.. no response.
fukn weird but my instincts are always right..
its veryyyy simple to spot a difference in pattern with just texting..
we textd all day every day.
then one day she just disappears

[FU3L]

Ok she finally come clean with me. She's in a bad way financially. 20k in debt!! Cards, loan and overdraft. Basically more money going out than coming in every month. Single parent living with her own home and a ex who is not pulling his weight.

She said she was pushing me because she didnt want to drag me down with her.

Meeting up for lunch later. Not sure how to play this one.

Lol, as usual OP is a goober and will get sucked back in despite all the advice telling him to gtfo.

[CT2018]

Lol, as usual OP is a goober and will get sucked back in despite all the advice telling him to gtfo.

Tough love there dude. Hindsight is a great thing, I can see how my actions drove her away now, which was a shame because I really liked her. Live and learn.

[NitrogenWidget]

Ok she finally come clean with me. She's in a bad way financially. 20k in debt!! Cards, loan and overdraft. Basically more money going out than coming in every month. Single parent living with her own home and a ex who is not pulling his weight.

She said she was pushing me because she didnt want to drag me down with her.

Meeting up for lunch later. Not sure how to play this one.

unless the ex is basically jobless it takes very little these days for a woman to fill out a piece of paper, get a court date and have the ex's wages garnished for child support.

trust me on this.
If there is one thing the court system does expediently it's getting single mother's with no real jobs off the government dole by ass-raping the father financially.

run Forrest run.