The No Contact Thread v2.0

[petemar]

I know those feels brah. When someone like that has passed by in your life, you dont know it at the moment till its over. But when it is you can look back and just think "wow". My ex is one of the few people in this world who had solid values and morals, an old soul if you will. What a heart she had. She was a beautiful person inside and out and with where I'm at, in my heart of hearts if I ever heard from her again, I genuinely hope that she would tell me of all the success she had in her life whether it be her career, relationship, health, family, or children and has found happiness. Me and her together we had that moment of happiness together but it was a mere flicker. I hope she finds that lifelong happiness so many are searching for because I really think she deserves it. I truly do.

I love old souls. They're the salt of the earth (pardon the biblical reference from a Buddhist, lol). Without people like her and your ex, and my ex for that matter, life can be pretty damn bland. What's so amazing about them is that, while it hurts to say goodbye, it feels amazing just having known them. Like the way you feel when you watch a sunrise... They touch our hearts and we're better having known them. Angels.

Here's to hoping we encounter a hundred million people just as spectacular in our lifetimes... or just one more that won't say goodbye.

[imawesomebro27]

Time for my beta Lord Byron-ish thoughts:

At first, I just enjoyed talking to her. It was so refreshing! Then I wanted romance with her - she is quite spectacularly beautiful - but when she rejected my advances, I wanted genuine friendship with her. How quickly I'd pack up and move if I could find a city full of people like her.

She's such a blessing to have known. I've never seen a more amazingly beautiful soul. I wish her kind wasn't so rare. The world would be a better place.

I will never again try to escalate - or even be open to the idea of romance - with someone who so throughly resonates with me. I never want to say goodbye to someone like her again. Ever. I treasured our talks, treasured just knowing her. And now all I can do is hope that she smiles from time to time.

Such is life.

I'm confused. Is this a oneitis or ex? Too poetic for me brah.

[petemar]

I'm confused. Is this a oneitis or ex? Too poetic for me brah.

Lol, neither. She was just someone I happened upon and knew for a short while. Someone I greatly admire.

Oneitis isn't the right word for it because I'd be just as happy as her close friend as I would as her lover.

[TimeToGrowUp]

If she never called it quits on me I would NOT be where I am today when I think about it. All this growth I've experienced in the past few months is because she left me. I would of never took the same chances and opportunities if we were still together. Because of how everything has worked out for me with my life recently it almost feels as if it meant to be. (corny I know) but too many things fell in a perfect line for me and I'm sittin quite pretty haha. Sometimes you just dont know where you'll end up after something life changing like that, although it wasn't right away, so heads up brahs

Only thing keeping me going - everything else in my life is on the up and I'm becoming a far better person. It's just a shame something like this had to happen to make me the man I should have been all along.

It's bizarre that this has basically killed my anxiety, making me more confident, assertive & less awkward. Only real concern is I may develop some sort of sex addiction when I finally get over the grief. Sorry to lower the tone but I'm masturbating a lot at the moment.. Hopefully it's just some sort of outlet to blow off steam (no puns pls).

[TXNinja99]

Stay strong homies.

[skarj]

Guys I really need a hand with how I’m going. Basically I dated this girl for 18 months, we were in a LDR with me in Australia and her in England. Have had a fair few gfs before her and this was something awesome, really made me happy. I struggled with long term anxiety, depression and feeling really insecure and we spent a lot of time talking about it and trying to work it out. At the same time she had her own anxiety but it was more based on being a perfectionist at work and stressing about exams and such. I went over twice last year and spent time with her family and friends, I got quite insecure around her friends as they were talking heaps about her ex boyfriends and dudes she’s tried to get with. Obviously my problems were quite bad so I started seeing a shrink to talk about it and finally have recently just got off my meds.

She was coming to oz for 3 weeks over easter and I havnt seen her since Christmas which I spent with her family. While I was there I was quite stressed out because I had to find out if I passed my degree, my family came over and spent Christmas with hers and I was quite depressed while there, as she had to go to work and I had to just sit at home all day, which is hindsight is bull since I was in London and could have done anything. Just felt so insecure and stressed out and didn’t have the motivation to do anything. One day I didn’t get up until 3pm because I felt like absolute crap.

Anyways we were going ok since I got back, but last weekend she went to her friend’s wedding and got really drunk. She then didn’t text me for nearly 48 hours, even after seeing my texts just asking how it was or if she can call when she’s home. She wouldn’t have cheated on me, but it was more just the lack of care from her. That was the final straw though and she went nuts at me saying I’m selfish and she’s done.

Anyways I called her after 2 weeks of NC today to try to see if she would be willing to come over easter to at least get some closure, or maybe see if we can make it work. She said shes not coming, no way she will change her mind and shes just eating the cost of the ticket which is like 1000 pounds. Says shes not happy, doesn’t love me anymore and doesn’t care about closure, even if I lived there she wouldn’t want to see me or talk to me about it. Then she got really mad and I started saying that she will just find some ******* and realise that I treated her so well. Has just been so crap saying she cant remember any positive times with me and then started shouting getting really angry. I asked her if she is leaving me for somebody and she said no, she just doesn’t want a relationship that is making her really unhappy.

What I don’t understand is how can someone who 2 weeks ago was about to book her visa to move here and telling me how excited she is to see me,is now having this dramatic of a reaction. I wished her all the best for life, and will probably send her mum a message on fb because she’s awesome but then I have to just go NC, which is bloody painful considering I have planned my life around her moving here later this year.

Look after me brahs please, all I want is her back and I know it is never going to happen.

[Violettt]

"If you love it set it free, if it never comes back it was never yours to begin with."

Memories. This reminds me of an ex who said that quote to me before. Well, years after the breakup he contacted me (after NC) and we start catching up on what's going on in our lives. He told me that talking to me makes him start loving me again. I didn't feel the same. He had changed so much...his personality and everything. I miss the person he used to be but that person I knew is gone now. We had both changed a lot since then. Anddddd now we're no contact...again. Proof you should keep NC with an ex!

[Elebrah]

Guys I really need a hand with how I’m going. Basically I dated this girl for 18 months, we were in a LDR with me in Australia and her in England. Have had a fair few gfs before her and this was something awesome, really made me happy. I struggled with long term anxiety, depression and feeling really insecure and we spent a lot of time talking about it and trying to work it out. At the same time she had her own anxiety but it was more based on being a perfectionist at work and stressing about exams and such. I went over twice last year and spent time with her family and friends, I got quite insecure around her friends as they were talking heaps about her ex boyfriends and dudes she’s tried to get with. Obviously my problems were quite bad so I started seeing a shrink to talk about it and finally have recently just got off my meds.

She was coming to oz for 3 weeks over easter and I havnt seen her since Christmas which I spent with her family. While I was there I was quite stressed out because I had to find out if I passed my degree, my family came over and spent Christmas with hers and I was quite depressed while there, as she had to go to work and I had to just sit at home all day, which is hindsight is bull since I was in London and could have done anything. Just felt so insecure and stressed out and didn’t have the motivation to do anything. One day I didn’t get up until 3pm because I felt like absolute crap.

Anyways we were going ok since I got back, but last weekend she went to her friend’s wedding and got really drunk. She then didn’t text me for nearly 48 hours, even after seeing my texts just asking how it was or if she can call when she’s home. She wouldn’t have cheated on me, but it was more just the lack of care from her. That was the final straw though and she went nuts at me saying I’m selfish and she’s done.

Anyways I called her after 2 weeks of NC today to try to see if she would be willing to come over easter to at least get some closure, or maybe see if we can make it work. She said shes not coming, no way she will change her mind and shes just eating the cost of the ticket which is like 1000 pounds. Says shes not happy, doesn’t love me anymore and doesn’t care about closure, even if I lived there she wouldn’t want to see me or talk to me about it. Then she got really mad and I started saying that she will just find some ******* and realise that I treated her so well. Has just been so crap saying she cant remember any positive times with me and then started shouting getting really angry. I asked her if she is leaving me for somebody and she said no, she just doesn’t want a relationship that is making her really unhappy.

What I don’t understand is how can someone who 2 weeks ago was about to book her visa to move here and telling me how excited she is to see me,is now having this dramatic of a reaction. I wished her all the best for life, and will probably send her mum a message on fb because she’s awesome but then I have to just go NC, which is bloody painful considering I have planned my life around her moving here later this year.

Look after me brahs please, all I want is her back and I know it is never going to happen.

PMd you

[BreakYouDown]

Still keeping at it. Still think about her everyday but not as often anymore..

Will never understand why they have to send the "how are you/are you okay" text after they cheat/dump you? How the f@ck do you think we will!

I really just want to be over with this **** already

[petemar]

Still keeping at it. Still think about her everyday but not as often anymore..

Will never understand why they have to send the "how are you/are you okay" text after they cheat/dump you? How the f@ck do you think we will!

I really just want to be over with this **** already

Something I've learned firsthand: NC does not make you get over someone. Not hearing from someone for a while might make the pain go away. It forces you to resign yourself to the reality of the situation - that your love isn't enough to sustain a relationship, that the other person or the circumstances make a relationship with that person impossible. Resignation to the end comes with NC, and the death of that glimmer of hope that things will work out is probably the saddest part.

But I've befriended many elderly men and women who have confided in me that they still think about people that were once friends or lovers 20, 30, and even 40 years after "the end" of those relationships. I myself have never stopped loving anyone I once loved, regardless of how much time has passed since I saw their face or held a conversation with them.

If you go into this wondering how long it's going to be before you forget them, think again. Even a lifetime can't cleanse past loves from our minds. That's okay, though. I mean, what feels better than love? Amp up the love, let it dissolve the hurt, live in it. There's no shame in loving someone who doesn't love you. It's an unfortunate predicament to be in, but an all too common one.

The Sioux believe that if you die in unrequited love, your soul will wander between the winds for eternity. If that's true, I'm fking screwed, and so are most of the people reading this post.

[yeshli2nuts]

Going on about 24 hours of NC with ex-gf of eight months who I broke up with two days ago, as I discussed here http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=161249493 . Feels bad man

[jmoock76]

Ex just texted me saying she was going into her "sugar daddys" house, and that hes fixed so he can finish inside... Was feeling great the last two weeks without her and now im all rustled. Deep breaths..

[moviebrah]

This sucks brahs. I'm talking to like 5 different girls right now and I just can't get my ex out of my head. I know she is never coming back but I keep thinking about her. When does it end? I keep making myself feel like chit because of the mistakes I made. When do you even know you've found the one? I feel like I lost that. Like I'm never going to find a girl as good as her again

[bananabucket]

This sucks brahs. I'm talking to like 5 different girls right now and I just can't get my ex out of my head. I know she is never coming back but I keep thinking about her. When does it end? I keep making myself feel like chit because of the mistakes I made. When do you even know you've found the one? I feel like I lost that. Like I'm never going to find a girl as good as her again

how long has it been? trust me brah, you WILL get over it. everyone with any experience has been in your position, and we all have moved on from it. I had the same feels about my ex, but now I couldn't be paid to talk to her. I found someone much more compatible (and if it doesn't work out, I'll continue the cycle)

[moviebrah]

how long has it been? trust me brah, you WILL get over it. everyone with any experience has been in your position, and we all have moved on from it. I had the same feels about my ex, but now I couldn't be paid to talk to her. I found someone much more compatible (and if it doesn't work out, I'll continue the cycle)

Its been about a month now. I'm still so angry about how we ended and how she used me for sex and then dumped me. No girl is filling the void I have right now in my heart. It's beginning to affect my confidence in myself to develop a future relationship

[bananabucket]

Its been about a month now. I'm still so angry about how we ended and how she used me for sex and then dumped me. No girl is filling the void I have right now in my heart. It's beginning to affect my confidence in myself to develop a future relationship

this is all normal and expected. a month is nothing.. if anything I felt worse after a month. you cant expect to fall for another girl so soon after losing someone. however it IS going to happen and you'll appreciate it 100x more when it does.

[TimeToGrowUp]

I'm coming up to 6 weeks NC and still don't have the heart to even pursue other women yet. It just takes time, some less than others. This is why NC is so important - we all move at different speeds and if you see them moving on quicker it will destroy you. Don't compete, take your time and make sure everything you do has your best interests at heart rather than trying to prove something to someone else.

[Gringo12]

This sunday it will be have been 1 month since ive seen or heard my ex gf.

I struggle to remember what it was like :/.

All gooood brahs. All good.

[yeshli2nuts]

This sucks brahs. I'm talking to like 5 different girls right now and I just can't get my ex out of my head. I know she is never coming back but I keep thinking about her. When does it end? I keep making myself feel like chit because of the mistakes I made. When do you even know you've found the one? I feel like I lost that. Like I'm never going to find a girl as good as her again

You will keep feeling like you're never going to find another girl like her... until you actually do find a girl who is better, and then you're going to think to yourself "holy shyt what was I even thinking being with her??" It will happen brah. You might find that girl tomorrow or you might find her in a year, but if you keep looking, you will find her. There are 3+ billion girls in the world. Think about that.

[tresdosuno]

Tfw your ex is not on your mind 24/7 and sometimes you're even surprised that you've gone says without thinking about them

We will all make it

[TimeToGrowUp]

Tfw your ex is not on your mind 24/7 and sometimes you're even surprised that you've gone says without thinking about them

We will all make it

I want those feels. Still feel like sheet after seeing her pic on FB a couple of days ago. Hold me misc.

[skarj]

Deleted her fb, phone number. Still have heaps of pics on my phone but some of them I need to give her (probably get my sister to so I don't break NC) and I don't really want to look through them all/delete them yet. Had such a horrible nights sleep and feel so **** today. The concept of someone just deciding it's not worth you being in their life is terrible.

Thought of her being out picking up is killing me as well.

[SquatTillSenile]

Been having some one night stands and getting different girls numbers and setting dates. Meaningless sex works to temporarily numb the pain for now. Feels okay man

[Carson92]

All my ex's stuff was picked up today. Feelsweirdman. She also started liking everything I post on social media as of yesterday. Still 13 days NC.

[skarj]

My sisters fb was open and saw my ex is out clubbing with her friends. Trying to do NC but all I want to do is text her. Fukkkkk

[crusader005]

Hey guys.. going on almost 3 months of NC and I think today just proved today that I will stay NC forever with my ex. Today is my birthday and as it passes by, I kinda expected a happy birthday text at least from my recent ex who dumped me . It was more of a test on myself as I was really curious to see if she would contact me. I implemented NC by putting the ball in her court as she was getting less responsive and she just never hit me up. So before you bros say that I am pathetic for waiting around for a text, that is not the case here. I'm not saying I would go out with her again...but if she wanted to talk to me then whatever. But nope nothing... I know it sounds like that I'm butthurt or anything... but I'm just more disappointed in her as a person. She just proved to me that she is a coward and can't wish someone who was part of their life for a while just a happy birthday. Sure, girls don't like to initiate but when a girl isn't willing to take a chance on any situation at all, i don't care if she is 10/10, she has such a ugly personality. I had to get this little rant off my chest right before I go to the club, and I actually feel better!

Take care bros, remember... "THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!!"

[bertishere]

My sisters fb was open and saw my ex is out clubbing with her friends. Trying to do NC but all I want to do is text her. Fukkkkk

out of respect your sister should delete her off fb.

[zackarykapowski]

it's really strange how you view things after a certain amount of time has passed. all the different emotions and mindstates you experience and go through. the way you view things changes drastically. it's really strange and mindblowing how the perspective changes so much.

[biggerleaffan]

fuark haven't checked in for a while
4 months NC now
brahs it gets better, everyday there's something that happens that reminds me of her but the thought of her goes away almost instantly now, no longer dwell on her or anything

[zackarykapowski]

fuark haven't checked in for a while
4 months NC now
brahs it gets better, everyday there's something that happens that reminds me of her but the thought of her goes away almost instantly now, no longer dwell on her or anything

glad for you man. it fades more and more each day. might have some moments where it comes back on you and hurts, but those become less and less all the time.