Deeply Attracted to a married woman twice my age. Need Help!

[bobby666]

OP:

You are not yet life savvy enough to deal with this situation. I assume this is the case, and I think I am rightly justified, because you had to (or wanted to) come to an internet forum to find an answer to a problem that can be handled on your own terms without other peoples' opinions.

Someone with enough experience will do this: sleep with the vagina, if that's something you both wanted to do (use protection) and move on. If you can continue to have sex and not acquire any emotional attachment, go on ahead. I fear you, however, will develop feelings (hell, you already have and you've yet to put it in). I can almost assure you that you will develop feelings that will stifle all progress in your life, then, when it all comes crashing down (and it will), you will find yourself empty and with a pissed off husband who may seek you out for revenge in any way he deems necessary.

My bottom line: You are way in too deep over this vagina that it is clouding your life view. Do not do it.

Thank you for the very well written suggestion, mate!!

[dest0]

She's married, has a daughter.

You don't pursue a woman with such status no matter what the case is, find a single girl.

[seibert253]

In for husband showing up and OP dodging gunfire.

[bobby666]

in for husband showing up and op dodging gunfire.

rofl!!! :d

[stealpulse]

Think about this then. Your mother's own cooter, where you grew and lived for 9 months, is just like every other woman's that's lived on this Earth. That thing still gets hot and wet when she gets complimented and hit on by random men that she's sexually attracted to.....so how's that make you feel, honestly? You would feel pretty bad if you found out she was letting random guys split that thing open giving her violent, squirting orgasms. How about after she sucks their dick and swallows their load, she comes home and plants a couple of kisses on you and daddy? It was just for fun, though, so as long as you and your dad never become aware, you can't get hurt, right?

This. Read it again OP.









When you're done reading it, read it one more time.

[jeffl1980]

She's married, has a daughter.

You don't pursue a woman with such status no matter what the case is, find a single girl.

This^^^ she's married with a child, back off OP. Marriage is something you shouldn't f**k with. Can you not find a younger single female?

[insanityjlh426]

I find it amusing that people are focusing more on how OP is wrong for having this temptation and choose to ignore the woman who is openly accepting and flirting back, lol. I could understand if she found the situation to be disccomforting, in which case, OP should respect and step away. That's not the case. My impression is that she has already gone the route of ruining her marriage.

OP, I still stand by what I said at the beginning, but I did forget to mention the catch. You have to be willing to live with your actions, and accept consequences that can arise as a result. I am sure that you are well aware of what's right and what's wrong. That is why I am not bashing you like everyone else. Even if you went through with it, I wouldn't bash you. I've done it.

The point I am making is this: don't do anything that you will end up regretting in the long run. If you can do it, and treat everything the same the next day, then carry on. If not, then it's better not to risk it.

[bobby666]

This^^^ she's married with a child, back off OP. Marriage is something you shouldn't f**k with. Can you not find a younger single female?

Ofcourse I can find females of my age, but I'm sure you understand the difference.

[bobby666]

I find it amusing that people are focusing more on how OP is wrong for having this temptation and choose to ignore the woman who is openly accepting and flirting back, lol. I could understand if she found the situation to be disccomforting, in which case, OP should respect and step away. That's not the case. My impression is that she has already gone the route of ruining her marriage.

OP, I still stand by what I said at the beginning, but I did forget to mention the catch. You have to be willing to live with your actions, and accept consequences that can arise as a result. I am sure that you are well aware of what's right and what's wrong. That is why I am not bashing you like everyone else. Even if you went through with it, I wouldn't bash you. I've done it.

The point I am making is this: don't do anything that you will end up regretting in the long run. If you can do it, and treat everything the same the next day, then carry on. If not, then it's better not to risk it.

You hit the nail on the head insanity. Your advice is really sensible. Cheers!!

[dest0]

She's married, has a daughter.

You don't pursue a woman with such status no matter what the case is, find a single girl.

This^^^ she's married with a child, back off OP. Marriage is something you shouldn't f**k with. Can you not find a younger single female?

Ofcourse I can find females of my age, but I'm sure you understand the difference.

I'm sure he doesn't understand the difference.

Don't fuk with a married woman, think from the husband's prespective, you're away from your wife, working your a$$ off to get money, whilst some **** is hitting on your wife and trying to steal her from you..hmmm..not the best idea.

Negged.

[FatSoccerPlayer]

I find it amusing that people are focusing more on how OP is wrong for having this temptation and choose to ignore the woman who is openly accepting and flirting back, lol. I could understand if she found the situation to be disccomforting, in which case, OP should respect and step away. That's not the case. My impression is that she has already gone the route of ruining her marriage.

OP, I still stand by what I said at the beginning, but I did forget to mention the catch. You have to be willing to live with your actions, and accept consequences that can arise as a result. I am sure that you are well aware of what's right and what's wrong. That is why I am not bashing you like everyone else. Even if you went through with it, I wouldn't bash you. I've done it.

The point I am making is this: don't do anything that you will end up regretting in the long run. If you can do it, and treat everything the same the next day, then carry on. If not, then it's better not to risk it.

I agree that the married woman is the one who should bear the brunt of the blame. In my post I even acknowledged that this will probably happen anyway at some point. But OP posted the thread, not her - and just because someone is going to do something wrong anyway doesn't mean you should help.

[bobby666]

I agree that the married woman is the one who should bear the brunt of the blame. In my post I even acknowledged that this will probably happen anyway at some point. But OP posted the thread, not her - and just because someone is going to do something wrong anyway doesn't mean you should help.

Man, you look like a big moralist :P

[jinda628]

I find it amusing that people are focusing more on how OP is wrong for having this temptation and choose to ignore the woman who is openly accepting and flirting back, lol. I could understand if she found the situation to be disccomforting, in which case, OP should respect and step away. That's not the case. My impression is that she has already gone the route of ruining her marriage.

OP, I still stand by what I said at the beginning, but I did forget to mention the catch. You have to be willing to live with your actions, and accept consequences that can arise as a result. I am sure that you are well aware of what's right and what's wrong. That is why I am not bashing you like everyone else. Even if you went through with it, I wouldn't bash you. I've done it.

The point I am making is this: don't do anything that you will end up regretting in the long run. If you can do it, and treat everything the same the next day, then carry on. If not, then it's better not to risk it.

I havent changed my stand on this but lets just say I'll support your opinion for discussion purposes.
To make this work, I would say that the guy (in this case, the OP) should be able to let go when everything becomes complicated. Like when the old lady realizes they need to stop for the sake of her family. The OP shouldn't involve his emotions in getting into this kind of affair. Must only be physical, for sexual intent only.

The reason why I'm so against it is because of what I saw from the OP based from his posts. He is already so much into the lady even if the he still really dont know what the signs really meant.
He is the type that wont let go even if the lady has been pushing him away. He sounds like the type that wont be rational.

Man, you look like a big moralist :P

What do you want us to say? What do you want to hear? I bet you wont stop whatever it is we say in here anyway. You are clearly being immature. You should know by now, at your age, what is the right thing to do.

[poolshark472]

Man, you look like a big moralist :P

and you sound like an adolescent girl crushing hard on a guy she'll never get. grow up and let this go.

[bobby666]

I havent changed my stand on this but lets just say I'll support your opinion for discussion purposes.
To make this work, I would say that the guy (in this case, the OP) should be able to let go when everything becomes complicated. Like when the old lady realizes they need to stop for the sake of her family. The OP shouldn't involve his emotions in getting into this kind of affair. Must only be physical, for sexual intent only.

The reason why I'm so against it is because of what I saw from the OP based from his posts. He is already so much into the lady even if the he still really dont know what the signs really meant.
He is the type that wont let go even if the lady has been pushing him away. He sounds like the type that wont be rational.




What do you want us to say? What do you want to hear? I bet you wont stop whatever it is we say in here anyway. You are clearly being immature. You should know by now, at your age, what is the right thing to do.

I'm not the one who would'nt let go even if she's pushing me away. I dont know what the signs really meant but they were pleasant. Hell, we texted in the middle of the night and stuff. Today, I talked to her on the phone for 25 minutes and it was a kinda heart to heart, she was opening up. Look, I dont know, I believe I can pull out if things get complicated.

[midlifecrisis79]

I'm not the one who would'nt let go even if she's pushing me away. I dont know what the signs really meant but they were pleasant. Hell, we texted in the middle of the night and stuff. Today, I talked to her on the phone for 25 minutes and it was a kinda heart to heart, she was opening up. Look, I dont know, I believe I can pull out if things get complicated.

You're already hung up on this woman. You wont "pull out" if it gets complicated. It already is complicated so by your logic you should be down the road. As I said, I dont care where your moral compas points as everyone gets what is coming to them. So when her husband shows up at your place and rolls you up into your own area rug to stuff you into the trunk of his car don't be a b!tch apologizing or begging for your life when he drags you out of the trunk and puts a gun to your head. Take a look around, there are plenty of mid forties divorced women out there that range from boring to crazier than a sh!thouse rat. Take your pick from those.

[1BadSRT]

OP, she's on the sexual prowl. Her husband is away, she gets a little lonely, and she may or may not enjoy a young boy toy. You're head over heels for this MARRIED woman and it will not work. I can tell you this right now, from experience, this chick will say all the right things, but will NEVER leave her husband for you. She may date you, f*ck you, and claims she "loves" you, but if she had to choose, she WILL choose her husband and daughter over you every single time.

[jinda628]

I'm not the one who would'nt let go even if she's pushing me away. I dont know what the signs really meant but they were pleasant. Hell, we texted in the middle of the night and stuff. Today, I talked to her on the phone for 25 minutes and it was a kinda heart to heart, she was opening up. Look, I dont know, I believe I can pull out if things get complicated.

Lol ok. You cant even let go at this point when nothing has happened yet.

[bobby666]

OP, she's on the sexual prowl. Her husband is away, she gets a little lonely, and she may or may not enjoy a young boy toy. You're head over heels for this MARRIED woman and it will not work. I can tell you this right now, from experience, this chick will say all the right things, but will NEVER leave her husband for you. She may date you, f*ck you, and claims she "loves" you, but if she had to choose, she WILL choose her husband and daughter over you every single time.

Thanks for commenting! Look, I'm not looking for a future with her, I dont want it. But I still have feelings so I'm pretty much on the crossroads already. Also, if something does happen, I dont know if I can handle such a relationship (like others pointed out).

[moviebrah]

but who was morals???

[1BadSRT]

Thanks for commenting! Look, I'm not looking for a future with her, I dont want it. But I still have feelings so I'm pretty much on the crossroads already. Also, if something does happen, I dont know if I can handle such a relationship (like others pointed out).

This is going to end in a fiery blaze. I said the same things: "I can get out when I need to, I'll be fine, it's all good fun." YEAH, it went like straight poop. I got caught up, listened to her sweet words and fell hard like a sack of ****ty diapers. It's going to be hard to sever ties because she has the career, the looks, the charm and the life experience to keep you hooked on her every word. Older women rarely marry the boy toy, they love them, keep them around, and when **** becomes too serious, they call it off. This will be the case because of her marriage. Imagine all the sweet things she says to you, and multiply them by a million fold for her husband and daughter.

[bobby666]

This is going to end in a fiery blaze. I said the same things: "I can get out when I need to, I'll be fine, it's all good fun." YEAH, it went like straight poop. I got caught up, listened to her sweet words and fell hard like a sack of ****ty diapers. It's going to be hard to sever ties because she has the career, the looks, the charm and the life experience to keep you hooked on her every word. Older women rarely marry the boy toy, they love them, keep them around, and when **** becomes too serious, they call it off. This will be the case because of her marriage. Imagine all the sweet things she says to you, and multiply them by a million fold for her husband and daughter.

You make sense, Man. Looks like I must be more mature here. I'm not thinking right.

[1BadSRT]

You make sense, Man. Looks like I must be more mature here. I'm not thinking right.

Just chalk it up as a lesson learned because you're stuck now and regardless of what we say, unless you drop her cold turkey, you'll keep gravitating towards her. Once you fook her, it's over. More than likely it'll be sans rubber after the first time and not a single f*ck will be given about pulling out.

[poolshark472]

This is going to end in a fiery blaze. I said the same things: "I can get out when I need to, I'll be fine, it's all good fun." YEAH, it went like straight poop. I got caught up, listened to her sweet words and fell hard like a sack of ****ty diapers. It's going to be hard to sever ties because she has the career, the looks, the charm and the life experience to keep you hooked on her every word. Older women rarely marry the boy toy, they love them, keep them around, and when **** becomes too serious, they call it off. This will be the case because of her marriage. Imagine all the sweet things she says to you, and multiply them by a million fold for her husband and daughter.

these kinds of stories make me never want to marry.....when the woman literally falls in love with the O/T and has real feelings for the affair.

[bobby666]

Just chalk it up as a lesson learned because you're stuck now and regardless of what we say, unless you drop her cold turkey, you'll keep gravitating towards her. Once you fook her, it's over. More than likely it'll be sans rubber after the first time and not a single f*ck will be given about pulling out.

Thats what happened. I decided 2 weeks ago that I'll leave all this. Went fine for a few days. Then she invited me for the meeting. I met her and went crazy again. I'ma take this real slow now. Lets see what happens

[AlexBlin2]

Man the best thing is to move on find another person. She is married and has 2 daughters

[bluejay83]

have you seen her without make-up?

[insanityjlh426]

You're already hung up on this woman. You wont "pull out" if it gets complicated. It already is complicated so by your logic you should be down the road. As I said, I dont care where your moral compas points as everyone gets what is coming to them. So when her husband shows up at your place and rolls you up into your own area rug to stuff you into the trunk of his car don't be a b!tch apologizing or begging for your life when he drags you out of the trunk and puts a gun to your head. Take a look around, there are plenty of mid forties divorced women out there that range from boring to crazier than a sh!thouse rat. Take your pick from those.

OP, she's on the sexual prowl. Her husband is away, she gets a little lonely, and she may or may not enjoy a young boy toy. You're head over heels for this MARRIED woman and it will not work. I can tell you this right now, from experience, this chick will say all the right things, but will NEVER leave her husband for you. She may date you, f*ck you, and claims she "loves" you, but if she had to choose, she WILL choose her husband and daughter over you every single time.

Lol ok. You cant even let go at this point when nothing has happened yet.

Thanks for commenting! Look, I'm not looking for a future with her, I dont want it. But I still have feelings so I'm pretty much on the crossroads already. Also, if something does happen, I dont know if I can handle such a relationship (like others pointed out).

This is going to end in a fiery blaze. I said the same things: "I can get out when I need to, I'll be fine, it's all good fun." YEAH, it went like straight poop. I got caught up, listened to her sweet words and fell hard like a sack of ****ty diapers. It's going to be hard to sever ties because she has the career, the looks, the charm and the life experience to keep you hooked on her every word. Older women rarely marry the boy toy, they love them, keep them around, and when **** becomes too serious, they call it off. This will be the case because of her marriage. Imagine all the sweet things she says to you, and multiply them by a million fold for her husband and daughter.

Thats what happened. I decided 2 weeks ago that I'll leave all this. Went fine for a few days. Then she invited me for the meeting. I met her and went crazy again. I'ma take this real slow now. Lets see what happens

I'm just going to respond to all this at once since it seems to all be connected...

While it seems like OP definitely has a little more attachment than he should at this point, the fact is that - regardless of the intention - there has to be some kind of chemistry/attraction from both parties for anything to happen. Just stating the obvious, I know. OP, I'll side with some of these folks' comments and say that it seems like you are a little OVER-invested in this woman. There is a very thin line between infatuation and obsession. I found older women to be much more reasonable than the younger ones. It was easier for me to establish ground rules with them - regardless of whether they were single or spoken for - to avoid an attachment that would get nowhere in the end.

You definitely need to take a step back and regroup. This isn't a "let's see what happens" or "take it slow" type of situation here. That is the wrong logic to apply based on the variables being considered. Those approaches indicate the intention of seeing things beyond an FWB arrangement. Now that is something that I will also not agree with. She is obviously still married for a reason...she knows what she has in the man that she is with. If I recall, the reason they do not live together is because of her work, correct? While there are arguments that can be used against her, you, and both of you (there are justifications as well...), the one thing to understand is that she will NEVER see you as a replacement to her husband. You are just an object of affection to her. You will only satisfy her cravings in her husband's absence. You're her piece of a$$, not a relationship partner.

Just trying to make sure you understand at least that much...

[bobby666]

have you seen her without make-up?

Lol! She rarely puts on make-up

[bobby666]

I'm just going to respond to all this at once since it seems to all be connected...

While it seems like OP definitely has a little more attachment than he should at this point, the fact is that - regardless of the intention - there has to be some kind of chemistry/attraction from both parties for anything to happen. Just stating the obvious, I know. OP, I'll side with some of these folks' comments and say that it seems like you are a little OVER-invested in this woman. There is a very thin line between infatuation and obsession. I found older women to be much more reasonable than the younger ones. It was easier for me to establish ground rules with them - regardless of whether they were single or spoken for - to avoid an attachment that would get nowhere in the end.

You definitely need to take a step back and regroup. This isn't a "let's see what happens" or "take it slow" type of situation here. That is the wrong logic to apply based on the variables being considered. Those approaches indicate the intention of seeing things beyond an FWB arrangement. Now that is something that I will also not agree with. She is obviously still married for a reason...she knows what she has in the man that she is with. If I recall, the reason they do not live together is because of her work, correct? While there are arguments that can be used against her, you, and both of you (there are justifications as well...), the one thing to understand is that she will NEVER see you as a replacement to her husband. You are just an object of affection to her. You will only satisfy her cravings in her husband's absence. You're her piece of a$$, not a relationship partner.

Just trying to make sure you understand at least that much...

Thanks insanity for making me understand all that. Yeah, maybe im too much into her and should take a step back. You're right. Look, I'm ok with a FWB arrangement but yes, I'm not sure how I'll handle it or if I'd get too involved even though I'm damn sure I dont want anything more with her. You've made me see some 'sanity' :P