Dating & Mental illness.

[Nelly87]

How far down did it end getting? So sad.

It took out North Western part of the Springs, Mountain Shadows and a couple other neighborhoods in that area. Official burnt down homes/structures were I think 346-349. That doesn't include homes that may need to be bulldozed due to fire dmg, etc. though.

Very sad, I watched from afar and could not believe what I was seeing.

[cyanotikat]

No.
Unless it was brought on by a traumatic event(i.e: accident) in which we were already seeing each other and was in "love" with. Other than that, if I can avoid a headache, I will.

[sarahkay_3]

That sucks. I've only really been to the airport there, so I don't know the area. Very sad to hear about.

[levijay]

No.
Unless it was brought on by a traumatic event(i.e: accident) in which we were already seeing each other and was in "love" with. Other than that, if I can avoid a headache, I will.

as shallow as this sounds, i would be the same

[BrotherWolf]

I had an ex (who did NOT have a mental illness) that was rather depressed after our break-up. (I broke up with him for reasons that he could have helped but did not want to make that sort of effort).
A week or two after the breakup he messaged me on ********, I replied. He wanted to be friends, I said I didn't think I could deal with seeing girls post on his fb etc quite yet.
Every day he'd message me on ********.
Some days he was nice, telling me he missed me (which I never reciprocated but told him that he needed to move on, that he needed to live his life).
Some days he'd say he wanted to kill himself (I begged him to get help)
Some days he just would rant at me for hours and hours and hours about how I'd ruined his life.

This went on for 4 months and only stopped when he got a girlfriend. I didn't know what to do; I couldn't ignore it because I was worried, but it hurt to be told what a horrible person I was every few days.

This is why people cut off their ex's.

sounds like a pretty average reaction a bit excessive but common... you broke up with him
the killing part is stupid , when a person is really dangerously depressed often you don't see it until it's too late
if someone wants to kill him/herself and they are severely depressed they just do it they don't tell you first .. I am not a psychiatrist but this is what happened to my friend
he picked up the gun and shot himself no prior notice

****!!! makes me depressed every time I think about it, I still cry when I think back... and we weren't even that close

[aristomeow]

sounds like a pretty average reaction a bit excessive but common... you broke up with him
the killing part is stupid , when a person is really dangerously depressed often you don't see it until it's too late
if someone wants to kill him/herself and they are severely depressed they just do it they don't tell you first .. I am not a psychiatrist but this is what happened to my friend
he picked up the gun and shot himself no prior notice

****!!! makes me depressed every time I think about it, I still cry when I think back... and we weren't even that close

After a lot of drama, a lot of bs, and a lot of second chances.

[BrotherWolf]

It's difficult to discern who is faking it and who isn't. Like I said upthread, I had a bf commit suicide. Didn't know it was coming. Knew he was depressed but he didn't mention it once.

If someone is mentioning it, likely they don't want to do it, but they do want some attention and or help.

Yeah this...
sometimes it's just too hard to give up someone even if you know they don't wanna be around you and that sometimes needs time
it might sound horrible to think that someone would resort to threatening to commit suicide but it is a desperate move, my best friend found herself in this situation , she fell for a guy I used to live with
he was on meds when I met him just me being around him and hanging out after a couple of months he was off the meds .. I take full credit lol
I met this girl that eventually was to become my best friend brought her home one night with her friend because she needed a place to sleep after months of me and her hanging out as friends
she and him kinda fell for each other this lasted a few months, she broke up with him when he turned abusive.. verbally or he'd be dead right now and I'd be writing from cell block C lol
but that's went he went crazy again, threatened to kill himself etc.. he would stalk her sending pictures of his GF one day and insult her the next day desperate moves
so basically he just turned out to be an *******

[BrotherWolf]

After a lot of drama, a lot of bs, and a lot of second chances.

of course, the point is it's still painful and hard to accept unfortunately second chances only delay the inevitable and make things worse..


perhaps you are that special and you drive people to do nutty things ... not serious

after all, men do the weirdest things for the love of a woman ..
women do to , think about those who are abused by their men but keep going back thinking "it'll get better this time, he promised" and you know many times either they end up seriously injured or even dead

[BetterMeToday]

it's fair to say that it would depend on my partner's willingness to seek help and continue getting treatment for the disorder. I could never be in a relationship again where that person allowed their sickness to continue harming me because they refused to acknowledge a problem. At this point (were I casually dating) mental illness would be an enormous red flag for me. I'm looking for someone rock steady and responsible, who I can have a family with, and mental illness isn't part of that.

I agree with that. I would only consider it if the person itself is seeking help and getting treated. That he is taking care of himself (it's a given in any case). So it depends on the person, how serious his illness is and how is he dealing with it. But as I've been through enough in my life so far, I would rather be with someone solid.
Then again, it's a totally different situation when you love that person, I would stay no matter what. I hate double standard for wanting someone to stay with you through your hard time, but then running away when the other person has hard time.

[Nelly87]

Now here is another twist though. A lot of you say you are willing to stay with them if the are willing to seek help. What if they weren't willing during the relationship but once you left them they said they would get it fixed? My ex is doing that to me and I am standing my ground. It was an issue for years and you never did anything and now promise to change once it is too late? I think not.

[cyanotikat]

Now here is another twist though. A lot of you say you are willing to stay with them if the are willing to seek help. What if they weren't willing during the relationship but once you left them they said they would get it fixed? My ex is doing that to me and I am standing my ground. It was an issue for years and you never did anything and now promise to change once it is too late? I think not.

More than likely she will seek some sort of help for a short period of time and then after you recognize it, she will go back to the old ways.
One of my old guy friends had that happen over and over and I told him to stop being a damn doormat. Be strong. Don't stick your dick in crazy again :P

Edit: Just my opinion! Of course you don't have to take it, I'm not pushing anything or saying that this will happen. It's ultimately up to you(Obviously).

[aristomeow]

More than likely she will seek some sort of help for a short period of time and then after you recognize it, she will go back to the old ways.
One of my old guy friends had that happen over and over and I told him to stop being a damn doormat. Be strong. Don't stick your dick in crazy again :P

Edit: Just my opinion! Of course you don't have to take it, I'm not pushing anything or saying that this will happen. It's ultimately up to you(Obviously).

Agreed. What's the bet, one fight, and she goes off her meds?

[Nelly87]

More than likely she will seek some sort of help for a short period of time and then after you recognize it, she will go back to the old ways.
One of my old guy friends had that happen over and over and I told him to stop being a damn doormat. Be strong. Don't stick your dick in crazy again :P

Edit: Just my opinion! Of course you don't have to take it, I'm not pushing anything or saying that this will happen. It's ultimately up to you(Obviously).

You are absolutely correct! I am NOT going back down this broken path. I spent years trying to work at it no more!

Agreed. What's the bet, one fight, and she goes off her meds?

Might not even be that, if something was hard or she didn't like it, would jump ship almost immediately.

*Edit - I just read what I said ^ and no, I did NOT mean my d*ck!!!!

[sarahkay_3]

Now here is another twist though. A lot of you say you are willing to stay with them if the are willing to seek help. What if they weren't willing during the relationship but once you left them they said they would get it fixed? My ex is doing that to me and I am standing my ground. It was an issue for years and you never did anything and now promise to change once it is too late? I think not.

Don't do it.

[Nelly87]

Don't do it.

I won't!

[cyanotikat]

I won't!

Yay Fem Misc saved someone! Lol

[Nelly87]

Wooo!! Thanks Fem Misc!

[mokutou]

My ex had severe, untreated depression that manifested in alcoholism. He lost his dad at a young age, and instead of going to therapy, he was told to man up for his mom's sake. Took about six years before the depression seriously took hold, and his alcoholism developed shortly thereafter. I tried for years to help him, but when they don't want help, you can't do a thing. I left him, after seven years, and he tanked even further before finding his rock bottom. He's doing better, but mental illness is serious ****.

My current partner has depression, but he's being treated for it and it makes me far easier to live with. I suffer from mental illness (depression, recovered self harmer) but I'm on top of it.

Really, it's just a matter of whether it's being addressed. The medicated schizophrenic is far more tolerable than the uncontrolled severely depressed person.

[tacdgb]

I would not date someone with mental illness as I have mental illness and I know how hard it is for the other person to deal with it. Dennis faces his challenges with it. He has said it is tough sometimes. I know how hard it is to be me.