Male miscers: How do you view women that you would label as a "slut" (srs)

[ziaziazia]

If she posts on the misc then she's most likely a slut in real life srs

[ClassicKaley]

In the beginning stages, I tell them my honest number which is high. Then I act completely non judgemental and encourage open sexuality in females and talk about the double standard society places on women. This is so she's honest with me when I ask her about her number.

dear god lol. pretty manipulative. but props for telling the truth.

Then, without telling her, I put her firmly in the casual relationship or potential for serious relationship category. It's the harsh truth and it IS a double standard but I'm not going to settle into a relationship with someone with a torrid sexual history of short term flings. There is a multitude of reasons for this, regardless of what the feminists in society say today. Ofcourse I don't tell the girls about this, but I play along. That is the honest truth.

It may be unfair considering my own sexual past, but I don't have to settle for a girl like that. There is an over abundance of women out there, most are good for casual sex but only a select few are worthy of being in a committed relationship with me. If they have a problem with that, they can go latch on to another guy with a different set of standards.

thanks for the serious response.

question, why though? the past is the past. i'm sure you've gone as you put it "torrid sexual history of short term flings" when you were younger AND single. not in a committed relationship. so why does it matter?

honestly think social conditioning plays a major part of it. there is such a negative social stigma against being labeled a "slut" or women being promiscuous that all guys now instantly associate a girl with a high number, with negative things like someone who cheats, is untrustworthy, etc, when it has nothing to do with that.

this is what sluts say (because they've banged a lot of dudes themselves)

nope, honestly don't judge a guy i like by the number of sexual partners he has. i'll judge him more off his actions and morals than some number in his past. now if he's still slutting around while in a relationship with me, that would be a problem. but if he's an honest, faithful guy that has all the qualities i look for in a potential boyfriend, whatever his number is wouldn't be a deal breaker at all for me.

[BeardBrahhh]

idk man but I'll just say it like this, I wouldnt mind if a girl likes to fook and do freak nasty things in the bedroom... I wouldnt really care if she did those things with alot of dudes before me (lets be real tea, I would care but as long as I'm not constantly reminded of that fact i.e. she did bang all of my bros before me or talks about past sexors alot)... but the deal breaker is that she has to be all mine and mine alone and she has to want it to be so and not doing it just because she knows that how she should be

that is a hard thing to find because usually if a girl has banged alot of dudes, there is something inside of her that makes her seek out different sex partners rather than continue to use the same ones. its one thing to like sex, its another thing to like sex with strangers u know? some people get off on actual sex, but alot of people get off on the "what would it be like to fook them" rush more than even the sex

[dopefish]

Here is my approach.

In the beginning stages of dating, I tell them my honest number which is high. Then I act completely non judgemental and encourage open sexuality in females and talk about the double standard society places on women. This is so she's honest with me when I ask her about her number.

Then, without telling her, I put her firmly in the casual relationship or potential for serious relationship category depending on her number and quality of relationships. It's the harsh truth and it IS a double standard but I'm not going to settle into a relationship with someone with a torrid sexual history of short term flings. There is a multitude of reasons for this, regardless of what the feminists in society say today. Ofcourse I don't tell the girls about this, but I play along. That is the honest truth.

It may be unfair considering my own sexual past, but I don't have to settle for a girl like that. There is an over abundance of women out there, most are good for casual sex but only a select few are worthy of being in a committed relationship with me. If they have a problem with that, they can go latch on to another guy with a different set of standards.

^This for sure

If I find out her number before things start getting serious and there are feelings I immediately disqualify her as long term relationship material. It gets more complicated if you find out after things get serious. One of the problems is that you can never be sure if shes being honest about cheating but then again a girl who has been with a lot of guys may know what she wants more than a girl who has only been with one or two. I think the reason I don't like women who sleep around is that in my eyes she is letting guys use her for sex and I don't want a girl that a lot of guys have passed around and used. It's also important on how she got to her number 5 boyfriends is one thing; a gangbang is another.

[cdizzzle]

I'm an anomaly but it wouldnt matter to me as long as shes cool. Everyone deserves a chance...Worst case scenario I walk in on her blowing a guy, I'd have a laugh with my friends about it and be over it the next day

[GencFB]

Here is my approach.

In the beginning stages of dating, I tell them my honest number which is high. Then I act completely non judgemental and encourage open sexuality in females and talk about the double standard society places on women. This is so she's honest with me when I ask her about her number.

Then, without telling her, I put her firmly in the casual relationship or potential for serious relationship category depending on her number and quality of relationships. It's the harsh truth and it IS a double standard but I'm not going to settle into a relationship with someone with a torrid sexual history of short term flings. There is a multitude of reasons for this, regardless of what the feminists in society say today. Ofcourse I don't tell the girls about this, but I play along. That is the honest truth.

It may be unfair considering my own sexual past, but I don't have to settle for a girl like that. There is an over abundance of women out there, most are good for casual sex but only a select few are worthy of being in a committed relationship with me. If they have a problem with that, they can go latch on to another guy with a different set of standards.

Absolutely this. You will never find a good strong confident husband figure who will provide for you monetarily, emotionally, and physically if you were a sloot when you were younger, they just won't be interested.

[kel_varnsen]

will reply to serious responses.

let's say you were seeing a girl, who you thought could be an ideal girlfriend. she’s completely honest with you and you start getting serious with her. you start talking about each others’ “number" and you find out she's been with enough guys (whatever that # is for you, lets say 20 for this example) where you and your friends would label her as a "slut".

hypothetical question, just because she’s been with 20 sexual partners, would you no longer find her relationship material? do all those qualities you found so compelling and attractive about her just get trumped by a “number”. if so, why does that number matter to you so much?

if the she’s never cheated during a relationship and been completely honest about her intentions, why does it matter? it's just sex. people love to have sex. we’re all human. why would you even ask or care about a number? and what are you going to do after you hear the answer? if you got a satisfactory answer (lets say her number is 5) would that make you happy and more secure about her? what if you didn't know that of the 5 she was in a relationship with 4 and cheated on 3?

what if her number was 20? would that be a deal breaker? even if she had been in a relationship with 5, been completely faithful to all 5, and the other 15 were when she was single and with f*ckbuddies or FWBs?

i ask because i wouldn’t ever judge a potential boyfriend off the number of sexual partners he’s been with. my opinion or view of him doesn’t automatically drop after finding out a “his number”. it's just sex. how i view him depends more on how he acts, his morals, and his present day actions rather than his past.

how many guys have you fuked?

as for your question, it matters to everyone. it is just a matter of degree. the more guys a girl has fuked, the more of a slut she is.

[FsuNole7]

this. i wouldnt care unless some close friends or my boss banged her.

+1. But I would have to add in no kids or stds.
problem is though that most girls that had a lot of sexual partners have mental issues/confidence issues. And girls w/mental problems (i.e. Baggage) are not ideal.

It really has nothing to do with the fact she slept with so many guys...

[PepperedAngus]

A girls "number" has to do with what kind of decisions she makes and how much she respects herself and her body.

A girl who has 20+ partners at 20 years old has very little respect for herself and makes poor choices based on her hormones.

Women have a lot more at stake by acting like hormonal fools than men do. Men dont get preggers. Thats the old double standard, and its still the bottom line. Women cant act like men.

So when it comes time to put my time and effort into a woman for a relationship, if her past choices make it clear that she didnt respect herself and made poor choices, I become very wary that her core personality needs work and she might be the type to use sex to get what she wants from men, which is a giant red flag when you are trying to establish a lifelong connection.

The more women push for total equality, the more they are finding out they dont really want that, because you cant unlearn 1000s of years of human nature in 30 years time.

[Mikerub]

Wait Kaley you've ****ed over 20 dudes?

Sorry but this isn't going to work out, I'm ending things.

[drofox]

you understand that thats almost all the bangable girls in the US...

my point exactly

[GermanLifter]

didnt read

sounds like OP is a major sloot and trying to justify it

[bigbootyho69]

will reply to serious responses.

let's say you were seeing a girl, who you thought could be an ideal girlfriend. she’s completely honest with you and you start getting serious with her. you start talking about each others’ “number" and you find out she's been with enough guys (whatever that # is for you, lets say 20 for this example) where you and your friends would label her as a "slut".

hypothetical question, just because she’s been with 20 sexual partners, would you no longer find her relationship material? do all those qualities you found so compelling and attractive about her just get trumped by a “number”. if so, why does that number matter to you so much?

if the she’s never cheated during a relationship and been completely honest about her intentions, why does it matter? it's just sex. people love to have sex. we’re all human. why would you even ask or care about a number? and what are you going to do after you hear the answer? if you got a satisfactory answer (lets say her number is 5) would that make you happy and more secure about her? what if you didn't know that of the 5 she was in a relationship with 4 and cheated on 3?

what if her number was 20? would that be a deal breaker? even if she had been in a relationship with 5, been completely faithful to all 5, and the other 15 were when she was single and with f*ckbuddies or FWBs?

i ask because i wouldn’t ever judge a potential boyfriend off the number of sexual partners he’s been with. my opinion or view of him doesn’t automatically drop after finding out a “his number”. it's just sex. how i view him depends more on how he acts, his morals, and his present day actions rather than his past.

cliffs:

im a sloot

[milkbrah]

I'll take whatever I can get so I'll stay with her it will just make me respect her a lot less, till i think i'm losing her then it's back to normal for me

[3alaRase]

All my respect completely vanishes as soon as I realize they're a slut. Maybe if I was looking for fun or a non-serious relationship (ie. I knew I would never marry her), then it probably wouldn't matter. But her past speaks volumes about her as a person. It shows how unstable and uncommitted she is. I mean she had 20 guys before, what makes her think that I'm going to be 'the one'? I obviously don't have all the great characteristics they had nor any of the faults.

I think the real problem is society's 'dating culture'. It promotes lack of dignity, self-discipline and over-expectation; people continually hook up with no commitment or consequences.


But any woman who I want to be the mother of my children better be a virgin.


no hyprocite, because I am a virgin. srs.

[gwem32170191]

i ask because i wouldn’t ever judge a potential boyfriend off the number of sexual partners he’s been with. my opinion or view of him doesn’t automatically drop after finding out a “his number”. it's just sex. how i view him depends more on how he acts, his morals, and his present day actions rather than his past.

No, you ask because you're being judged for banging twenty other dudes prior to this guy you've found and want some reassurance that you're not just a big nasty slut. Well I've got some bad news.

You are very uninformed what morals are. You are ok with him banging 20 girls, because its just sex, but your viewpoint on him depends on his morals? Lady, if he had sex with 20 girls on the random, he doesn't have morals.

The past is the past and no one can change that. But... to find out that your girlfriend was the town tramp is a lot to handle. He's going to wonder why twenty men found you unsuitable to keep around, or why you did the reverse. Is history going to repeat itself? That's a question going through his mind. No one wants to be the one you "Settled" with.

To me personally, I might be able to forgive that, but to me, you having sex with that many people is just selfish. You were only in it for you, and you're still only in it for you.

I want you to sit and think about this. In history, why is being the first to discover something so important? The first person to climb Everest, to go to the moon, to discover a new invention... why is that such an important thing to people? Because it means its yours. How could a woman be truly mine if she's given herself to twenty other men?

You can try to give everything your boyfriend, but you can't give him what you've already given twenty other men. However a small or large of a piece of you they took when they left you simply don't have that piece of to give to who you are with now.

[bigtex89]

I prefer not to ask about the number of people we've been wih cause it will make me look worse than her most likely. I don't really care too much about it

[ClassicKaley]

I classify a slut as someone who senselessly has sex with lots of people with no sense of loyalty. If she's with me and stays loyal (and doesn't give me an STD) then I'm fine.

agree.

if a girl hasn't ever cheated before (no STDs, is honest, loyal, has all the qualities you look for in a gf) then why does the number matter.

The higher number of sexual partners you've had in your past in relation to your age (lets say: 20 sexual partners at the age of 25), how many of those relationships could possibly be seen as 'serious' or 'meaningful'? That's a huge red flag, male or female. Why? Just because a person is open and honest with you, and has been loyal in the past, doesn't mean chit. Simply due to the fact that those other 'loyal' relationships never had to pass the test of time, because they weren't long enough to truly evaluate as a serious relationship.

A 25 year old girl that's slept with 20 guys. That number is incredibly high, and speaks volumes to her past. Does the past dictate the future? Not always, but a pattern of behavior can be a pretty strong indication to how things may turn out later.

do you think someone having a high number of sexual partners (which doesn't really show as much about her past and what's she's been through, more so than her present day actions/morals), is a stronger indication of how things may turn out than the opinions and views you've formed on that person before you found out that number? i'm talking about someone that you view as a potential girlfriend or boyfriend before you find out the number. why would it be a dealbreaker?

and the number of sexual partners a person has doesn't necessarily equal the number of relationships he or she has been in. single people have can have sex too.

I read it all, yes it would matter to me. I can't help but think girls that have sex with a certain amount of guys have little self-respect, which is enough for me to not want to be with them.

curious, how do you view guys who have had sex with a lot of women? do you think they have little self-respect too? i get that there is a double-standard, but still curious about your answer.

[Brunorad]

as long as she goes to woodberry academy its all good to me.

[JustThePip]

Depends. Some girls are sluts because they have serious issues. Some girls are sluts because they enjoy sex and don't give a **** what people think.

Honestly I think a big reason why a lot of guys hate sluts is they are intimidated or jealous. If a chick likes to get laid and isn't afraid what society thinks and owns up to it, good for her.

[Lastman13]

If she remained completely faithful to 30 guys, that means she was in 30 relationships.
If you get into and then break up 30 relationships...there are other problems under the surface. Big problems.

[IowaGuy]

Would be OPs 21st.

Hit me up OP.

[rckrdude]

dear god lol. pretty manipulative. but props for telling the truth.



thanks for the serious response.

question, why though? the past is the past. i'm sure you've gone as you put it "torrid sexual history of short term flings" when you were younger AND single. not in a committed relationship. so why does it matter?

honestly think social conditioning plays a major part of it. there is such a negative social stigma against being labeled a "slut" or women being promiscuous that all guys now instantly associate a girl with a high number, with negative things like someone who cheats, is untrustworthy, etc, when it has nothing to do with that.



nope, honestly don't judge a guy i like by the number of sexual partners he has. i'll judge him more off his actions and morals than some number in his past. now if he's still slutting around while in a relationship with me, that would be a problem. but if he's an honest, faithful guy that has all the qualities i look for in a potential boyfriend, whatever his number is wouldn't be a deal breaker at all for me.

This is going to go against all that society has taught women in the last 50 years or so, but the double standard is there for a reason. That kind of sexual history says a lot about about what sex means (or doesn't mean) to her. Your mentality of ''it's just sex'' is the product of either being with a longer list of partners (and being desensitized to the emotional aspects of sex) or society encouraging it, or a combination of both.

Ultimately, having THAT mentality about sex makes infidelity a much bigger possibility in a committed relationship. I'm not saying a girl like that will cheat but there's a much higher chance of it happening with her than with a girl who has a more romanticized view of sex (something experience with a lot of guys or FWB type relations take away).

Ofcourse this is a double standard because I might view sex a different way. But I'm not talking about what's fair here. I'm talking about the kind of girl I want in a relationship.

[Cynic09]

A high number on a girl will be a red flag. But I rather go in knowing it then finding out later. Because if I were to find out later, it's over.....

I would question why she been through so many guys. Either she has some issues or herself is not long term material. I'm sorry if that is not the answer you're looking for but in this day and age we can't afford to risk it like that with divorce 50%+.

[PepperedAngus]

Life is not fair. There are indeed double standards. Go against the grain at your own peril. your future will indeed be judged on your past actions by men with standards. Double though they might be.

[vcamb27]

Huge difference between a girl banging 20 dudes and dude banging 20 chicks. A good key opens many locks, a bad lock is opened by many keys/ thread. Who's trying to put a ****ty lock on anything?

[butwhowasfeel]

op, if i found out the girl had a high number i would be pretty set aback at first.

but really, i wouldn't give a fuk. why would i worry about how many guys shes fuked? i'm the type of guy who just likes to enjoy life, and if she adds to that enjoyment, i wouldnt care how many guys shes fuked.


we have 1 life and sweatin over the small stuff is stupid.







i fux wit all kinda bitches nomsayin

[esp]

I personally would not care but many miscers and other guys would. People (particularly Americans) place so much importance on sex. Its really not a big deal and its a shame people get labelled as sluts. As long as you play safe it should not be such a big deal. I would date a girl whos banged 20 guys. I banged 8 chicks myself and strive every week to go an phuck more women. It would be extremely hypocritical for me to judge a girl for having lots of sexual partners.

[crushintheface]

would never wife ...just smash and pass

[do13]

If guys didn't wean out sluts for relationship material, then evolution won't function right in social mammals. Paternal uncertainty is a bad thing indeed. Now specific numbers, it really doesn't matter. It's more of a judgement call than a number. 5 or 25 or 105 could be a slut in one girl... For example, if a girl lost her v card two weeks ago and already has slept with 8 guys.... versus a girl who has 8, but averages out to one every year since college... Judgement is key