Learn to not view events negatively

[Lolzords]

Don’t make events that happen around you mean anything negative about you… 99% of all the stuff happening around us is outside of our control, it just happens. It’s illogical to make it mean something about us… Be a good person for yourself, help others for yourself, be cheeky at the right times and never expect anything in return. What you are getting is self-satisfaction even if the other person doesn’t appreciate you, you're appreciating yourself.

I’m not saying ignore the responses of others if anything I’m saying truly listen to them… Instead of feeling sad someone was mean to poor little old you the center of the universe ask them what else is going on that’s making them upset… This way you achieve understanding and mutually benefit from it. I’m saying you give their actions your own meaning, someone being mean to you... Why it’s because it’s you right? Your story is that people are mean to you… So instead of trying to understand their hostility, you react by swearing or shutting down and then you both feel bad. The reality is that person who was snippy with ya might be going through a divorce and might have just received a phone call from the ex’s attorney and is understandably frustrated, and it’s nothing to do with you personally… Is it fair they reacted badly to you in the first place? Maybe not but we all sometimes do that sort of thing, seek understanding though and the negative situation usually becomes a positive one. Either seek understanding or let the comment pass and continue on your merry way if you don't want to know that's equally fine as well.

Others may not have intended their actions to be perceived by you the way you perceived them. But you listened to your own interpretation and chose to make it something negative about yourself… This resulted in a weak reaction on your part based on your own negative self-perception. A rational person doesn’t care if someone’s a dick to them because if someone else is unpleasant it’s not their problem and they don’t make it their problem, they may try to help but they always understand it's the other person's problem.

Don’t be nice expecting a reward, as humans we have to go after what we believe we deserve if we don’t play the game right be it a date or a job interview chances are we will lose, and it was our game to lose. There’s always another person or another job opportunity though don't get stuck on something that fell through. Tell yourself that you are enough, you have what you’ve been born with, you have what you’ve earned, all of that adds up to where you are at. If you want to feel good then feel good, acknowledge the progress you’ve made in the gym, reward yourself for trying and for not giving up. Don’t be too hard on yourselves for failing, we all fail… Success is born from the ashes of failure, people that learned from past mistakes who adapted in order to achieve the result they desired win. Then they realize it’s not a final stop they create a new goal and pursue it.

TL;DR
You give all the things that happen around you meaning.
Stop making those things mean negative things about you.
Often situations are far more detailed than you assume they are and by seeking understanding you reach better outcomes.

[RobertChase]

Dude, well said. +1 props

[PrimeTimeZach]

True!

[OneManMatrix]

Don’t make events that happen around you mean anything negative about you… 99% of all the stuff happening around us is outside of our control, it just happens. It’s illogical to make it mean something about us… Be a good person for yourself, help others for yourself, be cheeky at the right times and never expect anything in return. What you are getting is self-satisfaction even if the other person doesn’t appreciate you, you're appreciating yourself.

I’m not saying ignore the responses of others if anything I’m saying truly listen to them… Instead of feeling sad someone was mean to poor little old you the center of the universe ask them what else is going on that’s making them upset… This way you achieve understanding and mutually benefit from it. I’m saying you give their actions your own meaning, someone being mean to you... Why it’s because it’s you right? Your story is that people are mean to you… So instead of trying to understand their hostility, you react by swearing or shutting down and then you both feel bad. The reality is that person who was snippy with ya might be going through a divorce and might have just received a phone call from the ex’s attorney and is understandably frustrated, and it’s nothing to do with you personally… Is it fair they reacted badly to you in the first place? Maybe not but we all sometimes do that sort of thing, seek understanding though and the negative situation usually becomes a positive one. Either seek understanding or let the comment pass and continue on your merry way if you don't want to know that's equally fine as well.

Others may not have intended their actions to be perceived by you the way you perceived them. But you listened to your own interpretation and chose to make it something negative about yourself… This resulted in a weak reaction on your part based on your own negative self-perception. A rational person doesn’t care if someone’s a dick to them because if someone else is unpleasant it’s not their problem and they don’t make it their problem, they may try to help but they always understand it's the other person's problem.

Don’t be nice expecting a reward, as humans we have to go after what we believe we deserve if we don’t play the game right be it a date or a job interview chances are we will lose, and it was our game to lose. There’s always another person or another job opportunity though don't get stuck on something that fell through. Tell yourself that you are enough, you have what you’ve been born with, you have what you’ve earned, all of that adds up to where you are at. If you want to feel good then feel good, acknowledge the progress you’ve made in the gym, reward yourself for trying and for not giving up. Don’t be too hard on yourselves for failing, we all fail… Success is born from the ashes of failure, people that learned from past mistakes who adapted in order to achieve the result they desired win. Then they realize it’s not a final stop they create a new goal and pursue it.

TL;DR
You give all the things that happen around you meaning.
Stop making those things mean negative things about you.
Often situations are far more detailed than you assume they are and by seeking understanding you reach better outcomes.

Great information. I propose people try reading a book called 'The gift of imperfections', I'm halfway through and it gives some good insight into changing your mindset to understand that things, life can get messy sometimes, and accepting that.

[NosyJossie]

Being negative is a survival instinct that has served mankind for...ever. If we believe that by staying away from a human from another tribe we will survive, it lessens the risk of complications, arguments, hunger due to sharing - anything that might go wrong.

However, today it's clearer that a rejection from another human in the real world doesn't yield to many consequences. Getting rejected by a group of three women won't lead you to getting speared by their leader, or eventually hunted down.

More importantly, though, is the dilemma between avoiding pain and gaining pleasure. One would need a confidence as strong as diamond to approach a pre-historic group of people in order to lead them or at least join them, focusing on the benefits of sharing food, extra defending and attacking power, and information that may help the group grow. This proactive mindset would yield growth! Just as well, today it doesn't take much to make someone else's day a little better.