One of a Kind Gym Characters

[borat_sagdiyev]

The "Warming Up at a Metallica Concert" Guy:

You're on your last set of cable flyes, virtually struggling your ass off to get the 2 handles together, when all of a sudden this guy walks into the weight room, literally starts moshing as though it was the climax of a heavy metal song and he was in the front row then proceeds to rent a basketball from the counter, shoots some hoops for about half an hour at the court outside, and goes home.

The Soccer Player:

Everytime I see this guy at college, he looks(and smells) like the sole survivor of a train wreck. This guy spends about 25 minutes alone in the field outside the gym juggling a soccer ball, goes into the gym, proceeds to do a few concentration curls with an 11 lbs dumbbell, along with other exercises he's probably seen in movies, then heads for the cardio bike for about 10 minutes, followed by more soccer in the field again.

The Indian Entourage:

Don't even get me started on this one. There basically a group of Indian guys from India who go to my gym, I ALWAYS see one of them whenever I'm working out. Normally have a pack leader, who benches about 180 for reps with probably the ****tiest form you have ever seen, then proceeds to scream as though someone just grabbed his balls with a pair of pliers while repping out 45 lbs a side on the dumbbell bench press. Feels the need to walk around school with his GNC shaker bottle to show everyone how "ultra-fit" he is, when in fact he look like an ultra-douchebag. His entourage can normally be seen sitting on a bench in the gym alone a couple HOURS before their schedule workout, watching an episode of Friends on their laptop.

Rocky:

Basically the people who shadowbox, jump around and start kicking in the air like some Muay Thai champ between sets or for warmups. Annoys the hell out of me, especially when I'm struggling on my last set.

[BUGIE]

Rocky:

Basically the people who shadowbox, jump around and start kicking in the air like some Muay Thai champ between sets or for warmups. Annoys the hell out of me, especially when I'm struggling on my last set.

Snap... We have rocky at our gym except he does the ducking and air punching on the treadmill..... I'll tell you now it's hard as fek to run while watching some nerd air punch (with sound effects) next to you

[bbowen32006]

Beep Guy-

Guy ,he's about 220 11% b/f been working out for 4 years or so. Doesn't say a word to anyone (only girls fat or ugly he doesn't care), and all his reps are extra fast. During decline bench press when he powers up he says 'beep' really loud, he does 10 reps and says 'beep' on the way up on every rep. Then does tri pull downs and counts every rep, OUT LOUD so every person across the room can here him count to 12. YES OUT LOUD VERY LOUD..... I laughed, he gave me a dirty look, and I kept lift while counting in my head, who would have thought huh. He wears the running pants (covering his legs im sure) with a wife beater, everyone in the gym should see his upper body you know.

Saw him last night

[Blake Austin]

Beep Guy-

Guy ,he's about 220 11% b/f been working out for 4 years or so. Doesn't say a word to anyone (only girls fat or ugly he doesn't care), and all his reps are extra fast. During decline bench press when he powers up he says 'beep' really loud, he does 10 reps and says 'beep' on the way up on every rep. Then does tri pull downs and counts every rep, OUT LOUD so every person across the room can here him count to 12. YES OUT LOUD VERY LOUD..... I laughed, he gave me a dirty look, and I kept lift while counting in my head, who would have thought huh. He wears the running pants (covering his legs im sure) with a wife beater, everyone in the gym should see his upper body you know.

Saw him last night

LOL Good one.

[joe447]

The Monday night people-
These people can be found at the gym after work on Monday night only. They are never in the gym but on Monday night. Usually the female group of these people can be seen for HOURS on the treadmill talking to there friend about how they need to lose what they have gained from eating last weekend, reading a magazine, on the cell phone, or even just standing there. The males of this group can be found lifting, but only doing bi's bench, and maybe abs. When they are there they can be seen sitting on the bench or other equipment for upto 15 mins doing nothing. Then they always want to talk to you while you are lifting. Always asking "dude how much you....." Then they want to talk about how they need to lose weigh or some **** like that. Then they leave after about 30 mins. NEVER to be seen again until the next Monday night.

i see these people every Monday. They piss me off. Either they are alway "using" the equipment I need or they are in the way all the F***in time.

[Bushmaster]

The Monday night people-
These people can be found at the gym after work on Monday night only. They are never in the gym but on Monday night. Usually the female group of these people can be seen for HOURS on the treadmill talking to there friend about how they need to lose what they have gained from eating last weekend, reading a magazine, on the cell phone, or even just standing there. The males of this group can be found lifting, but only doing bi's bench, and maybe abs. When they are there they can be seen sitting on the bench or other equipment for upto 15 mins doing nothing. Then they always want to talk to you while you are lifting. Always asking "dude how much you....." Then they want to talk about how they need to lose weigh or some **** like that. Then they leave after about 30 mins. NEVER to be seen again until the next Monday night.

i see these people every Monday. They piss me off. Either they are alway "using" the equipment I need or they are in the way all the F***in time.

Good post and I encountered one of those fux just yesterday (Yes, monday). I do abs every other day and sure enough, yesterday there was this idiot sitting on an ab bench yakking on his fuking phone. All the other ones were in use so I hung back for a minute expecting him to get up, but he didn't..

"Dude, you shoulda been there! I TOTALLY got SOOOOO wasted!"

Finally, I asked him, "Are you using this bench?"

"Huh? Yeah man..."

So I flat out told him, "No, you're talking on the fuking phone. Some people actually come here to workout, so go outside to talk."

He got up and it pissed him off, but the funny thing is he got all Alpha into the phone to whoever it was he was talking to.. "Man, I hate this place! Some guy just came and tried to run me offa my bench!"

Seriously though, people yakking on the phone in the gym is really starting to burn my ass.

[jsheppard1]

The Indian Entourage:

Don't even get me started on this one. There basically a group of Indian guys from India who go to my gym, I ALWAYS see one of them whenever I'm working out. Normally have a pack leader, who benches about 180 for reps with probably the ****tiest form you have ever seen, then proceeds to scream as though someone just grabbed his balls with a pair of pliers while repping out 45 lbs a side on the dumbbell bench press. Feels the need to walk around school with his GNC shaker bottle to show everyone how "ultra-fit" he is, when in fact he look like an ultra-douchebag. His entourage can normally be seen sitting on a bench in the gym alone a couple HOURS before their schedule workout, watching an episode of Friends on their laptop.

I used to have an Asian entourage at my college gym. These 4 asian guys would do curls together and flex after sets. They were hardcore.

[Amra]

Lockeroom Countertop Captain: Old guy who insists on resting hist cock and nutsac ONTOP of the counter while shaving his face at the sink.

[PowerBuilder08]

"The De-Loader" - Yesterday on my set of squats, I did my warm-up at 185, and take the 25 off and am putting the 2nd 45 on. I do this, then walk two feet over to where I had set my workout sheet down to make sure I what weight I was doing, and when I look over, this dumb ****ing kid is unloading the other side of the bar. I just assume he is being a nice guy and helping me put the weights on for whatever, reason, so I think nothing of it. Then, he takes the 45 off and puts a 10 pound plate on, to do curls I'm assuming. I look at him and say "What the ****?" and he looks seriously pissed off and agitated, like "Oh, are you still using this?" I stare at him dumbfounded, and say "I just did my ****ing warm-up, I have 3 more sets to go, get the **** out of here." Then he goes and does abs and forearms...wtf?

[PlateSlammer]

I hate the lolly gaggers...just there to socialize. Doing anything to start a convo with you

[PlateSlammer]

The Monday night people-
These people can be found at the gym after work on Monday night only. They are never in the gym but on Monday night. Usually the female group of these people can be seen for HOURS on the treadmill talking to there friend about how they need to lose what they have gained from eating last weekend, reading a magazine, on the cell phone, or even just standing there. The males of this group can be found lifting, but only doing bi's bench, and maybe abs. When they are there they can be seen sitting on the bench or other equipment for upto 15 mins doing nothing. Then they always want to talk to you while you are lifting. Always asking "dude how much you....." Then they want to talk about how they need to lose weigh or some **** like that. Then they leave after about 30 mins. NEVER to be seen again until the next Monday night.

i see these people every Monday. They piss me off. Either they are alway "using" the equipment I need or they are in the way all the F***in time.

Dude!!!!! I worked out on monday night. It was soo packed I started at 8pm and got out at 11pm the next day. That's when 24 fitness turns into studio 24.

[user67987300011654]

the attention whores, the chicks that just come there to get attention, I despise those, like the one that told me las week nice Mercedes about my car
and I just said I know

the dudes with the parachute pants, the guys that bring their girlfriends and than just look at other guys and say damn that guy is strong, and the girlfriend is now staring at you

the horny old ladies whom look at you like they want to eat you. the old man that stops lifting and stands there and stares when you lift heavy

the highschool kids whom bring their little girlfriends and than take all the benches and dumbells cause that is all the do, chest and dumbells, while their girlfriends are actually now looking at the really big guys in the gym pushing heavy weights LOL

the women that walk around in high heels and strut like they are working the corner WTF its a gym not a club

[East1600plus]

There are a group of kids at my highschool gym who i'm friends with but wow they are lame in the gym.

Bench/arms: All they do every other day when they are in the weight room 1 day they do bench..the next they do arms thinking they are going to get huge. I have given them advice here and there, but they just laugh at me, eventhough i'm about 100x bigger than they are lol. They always go o man i'm huge to me like trying to make fun of me, yet they cant even fill out an extra small shirt.

[Karsk]

Magnet Man -

No... not a super hero. He's the guy who stays as far away as humanly possible from you... until you go to do a heavy compound lift, like deadlifts, or squats, or clean + jerks. Then he finds himself compelled to stand exactly where your weight is going to go [I've actually had one of these idiots walk AROUND the bar on the floor, and proceed to do bicep curls about a foot in front of the bar, while I was crouched over it. I'm hoping his brain just had to duck out on an emergency call]

[Flex Appeal]

The- It's true, I really have no idea what I am doing guy.

You know, you've seen him at the gym for 8 years and he hasn't grown an inch. He likes to give advice to everybody and tell them how long he's been working out and the advice is ALWAYS BAD.

[RollTide1]

reps for that. Why do they do that?

These are the worst.....

The old men in the locker room who I SWEAR just LOVE to be naked! They sit on the benches naked, shave naked, go to the bathroom naked.....it drives me insane. They'll stand and have 20 minute conversations each other while totally naked. I'm not homophobic or anything, but c'mon guys....not while you're naked!

[unrealalexk12]

I want to curse out the naked guys in the locker room every time. ****ing turds use a godamn towel.

[Pretty Boy Floyd]

so is there a complete list of all the characters?

if so can someone pm them? I'll rep

I dont think i can go through the whole (legendary) thread

[HulkHagen]

I took a break from my college gym-- a pretty long one, about five to six months, and when I came back last week everyone thinks they're Chuck Liddell now, shadow boxing and drinking from BodogFIGHT water bottles. I didn't even know BodogFIGHT sold water bottles, and I still don't know why anyone would go out of their way to get their hands on one, lol.

[BUGIE]

Miracle Worshippers

These are pretty much the Monday night people to a certain extent in the fact that they join the gym in mid may thinking that in a week they're going to be beach ready with their bulging 8 pack and gleaming body. Anyway they get on the treadmill or sit on the bench press ready to give it their all, Do some half a55ed attempt at a set, give up, go home and aren't seen again until next may.. Oh yeah and you can easily identify them by their newly purchased Nike trainers, Nike tracksuit, Nike T-shirt, Nike Cap, Nike Socks, Nike towel, Ipod

The girls in this group are the best as they come in the gym with their saturday night makeup and within 10 mins their makeup has run soo much it looks like they've been crying and their white t-shirt is full of lines of the runny makeup

[Mitsuomi]

attention whores:

you all know about these type of people. girls walking around with their bodyparts exposed or just wearing clothes that are see through. for example, today i see this girl bent over stretching and i can see her thong like she has no pants on. hell, i wasnt complaining. nice view during resting in between sets

abercrombie model:

this guy comes walking into the weighroom with a tanktop on except the sides are cutoff all the way down through his shirt, can see his ribs sticking out, chewing gum, has that preppy rich boy hair going, and thinks he's hot ****. he takes the equipment that he needs and uses it but doesnt put it back when otehr people need it. today, he was doing DB curls and after he was done one set he would go and pick up heavier DB's and would'nt put the other ones back. inconsiderate, stuck up, pretty boy looking homo!

[bigcalves]

gay trainer

this douche has his boyfriend come up while he trains people, and while his client goes to get water, he and his boyfriend make out (yes tongue in and everything) for a brief 10-15 seconds right in the middle of the gym. yuck.

[sugicalmike]

The Beach Comber....
This is the guy in our gym who looks like he's better suited for working at the tanning joint.... or selling snow-cones on the beach... His workout clothes consist of abercrombie cargo shorts, usually a tshirt, or sometimes a polo (Of course the collar is popped). He is often sporting a pookah shell neckalce and a visor... because the glare from the THREE windows in our gym must be a killer! We constantly question his sexual orientation due to the fact that while we're lifting he deems it necessary to stand within a 1ft radius and say "You guys lift here alot?" "You like doing that workout?"... personally I would like to kick his ass back to the shore.... f*ing creeper!

The bad-form badass...
That guy that oddly enough, does all the same workouts we do... shortly after we start.... though he cannot keep up with either our reps or our weights he still throws on well more than he can handle....
Apparently this makes him better than us, for he is a cocky and arrogant little prick with little regard for others... he is one to ask for a spot yet tell others he is "busy" (Doing jack ****) when they need one. He takes as many plates from the racks others are using when there is ample plates left at his rack, basically you just want something totally embarrasing to happen to him on the gym's most crowded day.

ARM DAY MAN!
He does decent sets and reps, respectable weight, and has a genuinely decent demeanor... yet all you see him do ever is Arms... I counted this guy do arms three days in one week.... I understand trying to improve certain spots... but he's kinda takin' it to the max.... on your actual arm day he will of course be there.... using the weights you intend to use... that he used yesterday... and the day before....


Oh and I almost forgot.....

The ******* on the cellphone

I can understand having a phone with you at all times for emergencies, or in case your work demands it(emergencies)... but do you really need to sit on my hack squat machine while you wrap up your fifteen minute convo with whatever douche is on the other line? Yes I am staring at you... Yes I would like to use that machine... Yes, get teh F*k outta the way!

[BiigJohn]

The Screamer:

Can be heard from 3 blocks away. With a scream more powerful then a hydrogen bomb exploding, this guy attracts/scares everyone at the gym. Sometimes lifting heavyweight, but most of the time the weight doesn't match the power of the scream.

[doughasmuscles]

Mark became a vegetarian. Mark became unstable. Simba left Mark and took his children. Mark's autopsy showed his diet killed him. Mark is the vegetarian that lost his family.

Too bad it's true.

DHM

[DaCougarMech]

the skinny asian crew:
bunch of ecto short asian kids who spend more time oogling girls they'll never get than lifting weights
tend to occupy the benchpress for hours at a time without lifting anything over 100lbs
sometimes they'll have one semibuff guy who they all take advice from even though the guy is naturally like that and has no idea how to work out

[doughasmuscles]

This Paris Hilton wanna-be shows up at the gym with a little dog, bleach blonde hair, and fake blue contact lens. She's actually ugly but since everyone is convinced somehow that's she's beautiful they actually believe it. If she went to your high school nobody would want her. Everyone worships her but she's really fake. She's Chattanooga EconoLodge.

DHM

[bigDADDY205]

This one is for real: Ugly Possibly Lesbian Powerlifting Grunt Woman (my wife contributed Grunt Woman)

She possesses many of the traits already discussed here: Fairly tall, long scraggly reddish brown hair, eyes almost popping out of her fugly freckled face. Lays down on the bench to throw up some "serious weight" (135, I had to spot her once), and every rep is accompanied by the smell of wet dog and a hearty EHHAHH! Then it gets really nasty. My wife says she had no problem walking around the locker room completely naked, children present and all (this is at the local Y). She also said something to the effect of drying each pubic hair individually with her towel (runs to toilet, ralfs up protein shake) Nasty stuff, I'm tellin ya.

[user179144]

The Homo Sexual Cell Phone Talker, Who Does Girl Workouts But is Clearly a Homo Sexual Male/****phile, Checking Out The New Meat In The Gym And Giving Them A Smirk While Talking On His Cell Phone Out Loud Just Because He Wants Attention, Always Wearing The Same Clothes, Beader And Tight Girl Shorts: Basically this is the guy that......well the title says it all.

[Issobolic28]

gay chinese kid (no racist)

This skinny looking chinese kid who walks around the gym like a fairy. Nuff said.

There is one at my gym too. He does not train; but walks around I guess how they say, "Cruising for gay sex". ewwwwww