Eating Disorder Support Thread: "Take Action" (part 3)

[Grappa]

lol, I really hope I end up like you. Amazing progress though man, you're an inspiration!

I know you spent several months refeeding with no lifting or activity but your body recomped after working in the gym, right?

Well if u are saying gaining muscle mass as recomping yes. I have started lifting when i reached the state where my bloodwork was fine, i had energy, the edema went away and my med team allowed me to do physical activity. During that time i would not say i was fat, or anything,but yes i held all of my fat at the midsection, and that is finally evened out. Cuz the ****test part of it was i was skin and bones everywhere just not in my midsection, but nowdays i can finally sit comfortable D On th eother hand i just looked like an average skinny guy, keep in mind i was borderline underweight that time. During lifting i just toned out, cuz i have lost most of my muscle mass. Yes you will recomp once u start lifting, i do not know how much muscle you will gain i think that is a genetic thing etc. But my hormones especially my testosterone levels are elevated, so that is a ''boost" for my muscle gain i guess.

[AdamWW]

Well if u are saying gaining muscle mass as recomping yes. I have started lifting when i reached the state where my bloodwork was fine, i had energy, the edema went away and my med team allowed me to do physical activity. During that time i would not say i was fat, or anything,but yes i held all of my fat at the midsection, and that is finally evened out. Cuz the ****test part of it was i was skin and bones everywhere just not in my midsection, but nowdays i can finally sit comfortable D On th eother hand i just looked like an average skinny guy, keep in mind i was borderline underweight that time. During lifting i just toned out, cuz i have lost most of my muscle mass. Yes you will recomp once u start lifting, i do not know how much muscle you will gain i think that is a genetic thing etc. But my hormones especially my testosterone levels are elevated, so that is a ''boost" for my muscle gain i guess.

It'll be interesting to see how I adjust to weight gain as well. I have very large changes in appearance even on a daily basis (usually way softer/puffier in the evening) and so far my stomach doesn't look TOO much different.

I've always held most of my fat in my love handle area and lower stomach, but my legs/glutes stay pretty lean.

Doesn't matter much either way though

[Grappa]

His mental transformation should be the goal, regardless of how he looks or how his clothes fit.

This, once you solve in yourself why u are afraid of gaining weight, everything will be alrght, and you will not going to give a single **** about gaining weight
For me now the opposite plays a big role, i am afraid of losing weight.

[Grappa]

Alrght, tomorrow i am going to my first stag hunting, with my dad and my grandfather's younger brother. Hunting has a big tradition in my family, so it will going to be an awesome time to hunt with my elders. Also this will be my dog's first hunting too D

[AdamWW]

This, once you solve in yourself why u are afraid of gaining weight, everything will be alrght, and you will not going to give a single **** about gaining weight
For me now the opposite plays a big role, i am afraid of losing weight.

same... same... i do not want to dip any lower.

It's been such an interesting week already just not knowing what I'm eating and eating for energy and performance. I actually feel NOT cold all the time... I'm not going to bed thinking about what I might have the next morning... I've spending my time thinking about what I can DO tomorrow and what I accomplished today... instead of being so preoccupied with food.

Kind of opens up a whole new world I forgot existed. Pretty sweet...

[MosToorani]

Just wanted to make sure I put in a post today! haha!

I'm glad you guys are doing great and are seeing decent progress on the road to recovery!!

Today was a meh day! Thought I'd try working out fasted in the morning, yah .. complete fail haha .. powered through it with miserable strength and quite a bit of failed sets.. I guess I'm not part of the "train fasted" group haha .. lesson learned!

Cheers lads!

MT

[Grappa]

Just wanted to make sure I put in a post today! haha!

I'm glad you guys are doing great and are seeing decent progress on the road to recovery!!

Today was a meh day! Thought I'd try working out fasted in the morning, yah .. complete fail haha .. powered through it with miserable strength and quite a bit of failed sets.. I guess I'm not part of the "train fasted" group haha .. lesson learned!

Cheers lads!

MT

Never train fasted, NEVER! Maybe it is just me, but i am not willing to lift without food in my system no way. For me fasted training is like trying to run a car without gasoline.

[Grappa]

On the other hand, i have shot down my first stag in my life It took me 6 hours of chasing, but fking worth it \o/

[Grappa]

Also clk, land me a pm if u have any question about refeeding, i am gladly answer all of your question and soothe down all of your concern about this thing

[Groce]

Just wanted to make sure I put in a post today! haha!

I'm glad you guys are doing great and are seeing decent progress on the road to recovery!!

Today was a meh day! Thought I'd try working out fasted in the morning, yah .. complete fail haha .. powered through it with miserable strength and quite a bit of failed sets.. I guess I'm not part of the "train fasted" group haha .. lesson learned!

Cheers lads!

MT

I hate training fasted, never understood people who like it.

[AdamWW]

Never train fasted, NEVER! Maybe it is just me, but i am not willing to lift without food in my system no way. For me fasted training is like trying to run a car without gasoline.

This. ESPECIALLY in recovery

[AdamWW]

Played 18 holes of golf today with one of my leagues. Played horribly, weather was just shyt, but had a great times with my friends.

I admittedly did NOT plan enough food to bring... I thought i'd be OK but I got a bit hungry toward the end and just didn't have anything on hand. Live and learn I guess... thankfully I didn't have to walk though because the weather was just horrid.

Otherwise still doing great with progress... eating freely... sleeping better... everything feels like it's going in the right direction.

[MosToorani]

Haha calm down lads!!

I couldn't have breakfast because my mom was using the kitchen and basically locked the kitchen door as she was preparing a large feast for guests that visited from abroad!

So instead of nagging on her to unlock the door bla bla .. I was like 'let me just try to train fasted today and see how it goes' .. Horrible .. Horrible workout but I did manage to grind through it somehow though i did skip the BP lol.

@Grappa ... I'd like to go hunting with you man, it sounds like an amazing 'adventure'. I did try my luck once at a shooting range, and even when the targets were idle, my accuracy was still crappy haha.

@Adam we all go through these days where our skills just doesn't want to live up to what it can be! Nevertheless, you'll ace it at the next session! And, at least you had a great time ey!

MT

[Grappa]

Haha calm down lads!!

I couldn't have breakfast because my mom was using the kitchen and basically locked the kitchen door as she was preparing a large feast for guests that visited from abroad!

So instead of nagging on her to unlock the door bla bla .. I was like 'let me just try to train fasted today and see how it goes' .. Horrible .. Horrible workout but I did manage to grind through it somehow though i did skip the BP lol.

@Grappa ... I'd like to go hunting with you man, it sounds like an amazing 'adventure'. I did try my luck once at a shooting range, and even when the targets were idle, my accuracy was still crappy haha.

@Adam we all go through these days where our skills just doesn't want to live up to what it can be! Nevertheless, you'll ace it at the next session! And, at least you had a great time ey!

MT

Yeah hunting is a great experience, but if u can not tolerate blood that thing is not for you Things can get pretty gore fast, as yesterday, i have given a stag a heart shot, the animal ran away, i released my hounds, they found the stag in his thing called " death bed" and at that point you can not use your gun to execute the animal cuz it is goes agains the hunter etiquette, so you have to pull out your bayonet and thrust the steel into the animal's spine to kill it instantly. Boar hunting is more hardcore, injured dogs left and right, every1 is shouting, gun shoots every 20-30 secs, pretty intense experience But you have to born to be a hunter, it is not for everybody.

[AdamWW]

Sup guys!

Hope everyone is having a good weekend. I know I am for the most part

I wanted to pose a question to the group on here... especially @grappa, @sonny, and @strawng given your experience in recovery.


My mental focus around food has been great lately... I've been making tremendous strides in the right direction just not restricting at all and trying to let my body heal itself by listening and responding to my hunger and cravings. Urges to track and restrict definitely come to mind, but for the first time in a long time everything has been consistently going in the right direction... at least in terms of my thoughts.

HOWEVER, one thing that has not been getting much better is my recovery, and that's what I'm curious about.

I've been training 3-4 days a week, full body, and in general my sessions have been going well... though still not making the progress I'd like to see physically. Again, mental progress has been super.

In short, I don't know if I"m recovering as quickly as I should be. I definitely think I'm still under 140lb... still quite lean... and i'm just not sure if my continuing 'thinness' in recovery could be the reason for my muscles/joints/etc not repairing quickly and remaining sore days after I train.

I haven't lifted in 2-3 days now (though I did play golf yesterday) and my body feels very, very sore.

I guess what I'm wondering is if simply being LIGHT and LEAN still (despite eating more and gaining a little weight, I think) could be making my soreness last longer than it should and also make it harder to repair myself.

If so, i'll gladly stop lifting until the ideal time... I just don't know which to do.

Input appreciated

[Grappa]

Sup guys!

Hope everyone is having a good weekend. I know I am for the most part

I wanted to pose a question to the group on here... especially @grappa, @sonny, and @strawng given your experience in recovery.


My mental focus around food has been great lately... I've been making tremendous strides in the right direction just not restricting at all and trying to let my body heal itself by listening and responding to my hunger and cravings. Urges to track and restrict definitely come to mind, but for the first time in a long time everything has been consistently going in the right direction... at least in terms of my thoughts.

HOWEVER, one thing that has not been getting much better is my recovery, and that's what I'm curious about.

I've been training 3-4 days a week, full body, and in general my sessions have been going well... though still not making the progress I'd like to see physically. Again, mental progress has been super.

In short, I don't know if I"m recovering as quickly as I should be. I definitely think I'm still under 140lb... still quite lean... and i'm just not sure if my continuing 'thinness' in recovery could be the reason for my muscles/joints/etc not repairing quickly and remaining sore days after I train.

I haven't lifted in 2-3 days now (though I did play golf yesterday) and my body feels very, very sore.

I guess what I'm wondering is if simply being LIGHT and LEAN still (despite eating more and gaining a little weight, I think) could be making my soreness last longer than it should and also make it harder to repair myself.

If so, i'll gladly stop lifting until the ideal time... I just don't know which to do.

Input appreciated

Hmm well keep in mind recovery is a slow process, you can recover mentally quicker than your body recovers. I remember when i started lifting i was sore as fk 24/7. Luckily i never had joint pains, but with time it will get better and better, now i am really rareley sore, slight doms sometimes but that's it. I think the problem what you are experiencing is the following: U are eating more, so your workload can increase, but your joints can not cope with the pressure well. I do not think your leanness is a really really big problem in terms of recover from workouts, but i am not sure about that, i am still too lean also, prbly not as lean as u, but i do not have any recovery issues. I can even hit pr-s in and upper/power followed by a lower power day.

[AdamWW]

Hmm well keep in mind recovery is a slow process, you can recover mentally quicker than your body recovers. I remember when i started lifting i was sore as fk 24/7. Luckily i never had joint pains, but with time it will get better and better, now i am really rareley sore, slight doms sometimes but that's it. I think the problem what you are experiencing is the following: U are eating more, so your workload can increase, but your joints can not cope with the pressure well. I do not think your leanness is a really really big problem in terms of recover from workouts, but i am not sure about that, i am still too lean also, prbly not as lean as u, but i do not have any recovery issues. I can even hit pr-s in and upper/power followed by a lower power day.

Gotcha. Yeah I'm not too sure either... It COULD, i think, also be that i'm pushing too hard in the gym when I do go in... using RPE's that are maybe above what I should be following for 5x5 routines... I tend to push myself to the max. Not failing, but very close to it on my last rep. Could be better to get to maybe RPE 8 or so and leave 1-2 in the tank... especially given it's golf season again which means 1-2 rounds a week.

[Grappa]

Gotcha. Yeah I'm not too sure either... It COULD, i think, also be that i'm pushing too hard in the gym when I do go in... using RPE's that are maybe above what I should be following for 5x5 routines... I tend to push myself to the max. Not failing, but very close to it on my last rep. Could be better to get to maybe RPE 8 or so and leave 1-2 in the tank... especially given it's golf season again which means 1-2 rounds a week.

For me pushing sets to failure is not an issue. I know from prev experiences how food effects me. When i had to overfeed myself 1 week before my fights i felt like superman 24/7 The more you eat, the better your recovery will be

[sonnydfrizzy]

@Adam

Do this and you will recover better.
Take 1 week off and DELOAD.. 50% of weights for 1 set each. Eat the same.

Week 2. Do ICF Novice but only ramp up to 1 top set on EACH evercise for the first week. Keep doing this on main lifts trying to progress with 1-2 reps in the tank. Once you stall 2-3 weeks, add 1 set for that exercise.

EDs drastically reduce volume tolerance. Trust me man... every single recovered individual I know does not recover from exercise well for a long time until their body and hormones adjust.

[MosToorani]

@Sonny ..

Interesting point you make there with regards to exercise and recovery.

I've been trying to do ICF 5x5 as well but unfortunately, due to herniated disc and operation, I stopped squats (replaced with leg press) and barbell row (replaced with seated machine assisted row).

Any recommendation if the exercise replacements are okay? I still bench, seated press with DB and may add pulldowns ..

What do you think?

MT

[partydave]

Just checking in.

This weekend was much better. Didn't track once and ate like a monster, pancakes, treats, whatever I wanted. It felt good, but I have some (less than usual) regret this morning. I've managed to stay off the scale though

Next week I'm going away for a week long vacation, hitting the gym hard (yes, I enjoy working out) and hitting McDonalds harder. We don't have a Mickey locally, so when I get the opportunity, I clean them out

[MosToorani]

Just checking in.

This weekend was much better. Didn't track once and ate like a monster, pancakes, treats, whatever I wanted. It felt good, but I have some (less than usual) regret this morning. I've managed to stay off the scale though

Next week I'm going away for a week long vacation, hitting the gym hard (yes, I enjoy working out) and hitting McDonalds harder. We don't have a Mickey locally, so when I get the opportunity, I clean them out

That's excellent news Dave!

With time, you'll get over the regret!

I'm still on the bandwagon with counting calories and weighing-in.. Nevertheless, I've increased the amount I eat without any regret because It enables me to hit it hard in the gym!

MT

[AdamWW]

@Adam

Do this and you will recover better.
Take 1 week off and DELOAD.. 50% of weights for 1 set each. Eat the same.

Week 2. Do ICF Novice but only ramp up to 1 top set on EACH evercise for the first week. Keep doing this on main lifts trying to progress with 1-2 reps in the tank. Once you stall 2-3 weeks, add 1 set for that exercise.

EDs drastically reduce volume tolerance. Trust me man... every single recovered individual I know does not recover from exercise well for a long time until their body and hormones adjust.

I actually did that ramp-up with squats yesterday and it was much more tolerable.

Will keep that up for a while

Will try the deload this week.

[Grappa]

@Sonny ..

Interesting point you make there with regards to exercise and recovery.

I've been trying to do ICF 5x5 as well but unfortunately, due to herniated disc and operation, I stopped squats (replaced with leg press) and barbell row (replaced with seated machine assisted row).

Any recommendation if the exercise replacements are okay? I still bench, seated press with DB and may add pulldowns ..

What do you think?

MT

Can i ask what lead to your injury?

[Strawng]

EDs drastically reduce volume tolerance. Trust me man... every single recovered individual I know does not recover from exercise well for a long time until their body and hormones adjust.

This. Even now I have to take a break now and again to pair down the volume, but I had to modify all of my routines in the early stages of recovery because my body was far too lean to handle the stress without being sore/run down for days. I definitely suggest you give sonny's advice a try. I did something similar and it worked quite well for me.

[AdamWW]

This. Even now I have to take a break now and again to pair down the volume, but I had to modify all of my routines in the early stages of recovery because my body was far too lean to handle the stress without being sore/run down for days. I definitely suggest you give sonny's advice a try. I did something similar and it worked quite well for me.

Yeah definitely going to do this as well until I add more padding/weight.

[AdamWW]

Wanted to share some difficulties I noticed today just with my thought process. NOT meant to be a negative post, I just want to make sure everyone knows they're probably not the only ones who are struggling sometimes.

I said it already, that my overall mental progress has been great over the past week +. I've given so much less thought to food than before, I've been eating without concern for calories or macros, etc, almost all the time... in general I'm happy with my progress.

Today, however, I woke up feeling like I have a bit of a cold. Nothing serious, but because it's messing with my balance (these things always effect my ears and whatnot), I don't feel comfortable trying to get almost any activity in. I wasn't planning on lifting, but even some basic stretching, etc, just doesn't sound 'good' to me.

On days like this, I do still have the ED thoughts creep into my head, especially in cases like today where - despite almost no activity (and I mean borderline completely sedentary) - I still feel ravenous hunger.

I woke up and had a very, very large meal... and yet 2 hours later I still felt hungry. So, I ate again... 2-3 hours later... yet again hungry.

After several times of getting hunger urges when I know I am doing nothing to burn them off... the ED starts to kick in. I start to tell myself that it "doesn't make sense"... and that i'm not "doing anything to justify all this food... i'm just sitting here".

It is still a struggle on days like this, even though my overall outlook has been great.

I'm working through it... trying to ignore and just eat what I feel like... but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't playing tricks on me. Not that I'm counting, but I'm a math-dude/analytical guy by nature and professional, so I KNOW when I'm eating well over 4000 calories in a day before it's even 6pm, and I know I'll want more later. That is a huge issue with just having experience in tracking and logging food... you get real good at estimating, and my brain starts tracking without me even knowing it.

ANYWAY, just a general update. Getting through it, but sharing in our collective experiences and difficulties.

Stay strong everyone! Keep on fightin.

[Grappa]

Wanted to share some difficulties I noticed today just with my thought process. NOT meant to be a negative post, I just want to make sure everyone knows they're probably not the only ones who are struggling sometimes.

I said it already, that my overall mental progress has been great over the past week +. I've given so much less thought to food than before, I've been eating without concern for calories or macros, etc, almost all the time... in general I'm happy with my progress.

Today, however, I woke up feeling like I have a bit of a cold. Nothing serious, but because it's messing with my balance (these things always effect my ears and whatnot), I don't feel comfortable trying to get almost any activity in. I wasn't planning on lifting, but even some basic stretching, etc, just doesn't sound 'good' to me.

On days like this, I do still have the ED thoughts creep into my head, especially in cases like today where - despite almost no activity (and I mean borderline completely sedentary) - I still feel ravenous hunger.

I woke up and had a very, very large meal... and yet 2 hours later I still felt hungry. So, I ate again... 2-3 hours later... yet again hungry.

After several times of getting hunger urges when I know I am doing nothing to burn them off... the ED starts to kick in. I start to tell myself that it "doesn't make sense"... and that i'm not "doing anything to justify all this food... i'm just sitting here".

It is still a struggle on days like this, even though my overall outlook has been great.

I'm working through it... trying to ignore and just eat what I feel like... but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't playing tricks on me. Not that I'm counting, but I'm a math-dude/analytical guy by nature and professional, so I KNOW when I'm eating well over 4000 calories in a day before it's even 6pm, and I know I'll want more later. That is a huge issue with just having experience in tracking and logging food... you get real good at estimating, and my brain starts tracking without me even knowing it.

ANYWAY, just a general update. Getting through it, but sharing in our collective experiences and difficulties.

Stay strong everyone! Keep on fightin.

In this scenarios, just soothe your brain, play some games, read and eat a lot It is totally normal to eat big when u are doing nothing. Why? Cuz your body has to recover from prev activities. This is the same with me, when i am taking a day off and doing literally nothing, i am really really hungry sometimes, but you have to go with the flow this is the only way And in this situation keep reminding yourself, what is your goal? You want to gain weight? So yeah, u deff have to eat and eat. With time this mindset of " i have to earn my food " vanishes away and you will not going to give a single fk about what u eat when u are not active.

[AdamWW]

In this scenarios, just soothe your brain, play some games, read and eat a lot It is totally normal to eat big when u are doing nothing. Why? Cuz your body has to recover from prev activities. This is the same with me, when i am taking a day off and doing literally nothing, i am really really hungry sometimes, but you have to go with the flow this is the only way And in this situation keep reminding yourself, what is your goal? You want to gain weight? So yeah, u deff have to eat and eat. With time this mindset of " i have to earn my food " vanishes away and you will not going to give a single fk about what u eat when u are not active.

yup... even more so if you're sick: your body is recovering from lifting AND fighting a virus. I'll get through it. The ED voice can fukk off

[MosToorani]

Can i ask what lead to your injury?

Yes, Of course.

I was doing squats, was going for a PR, I knew I had it in me as the previous warm-up lift was easy!

As I was descending with the PR weight on my back, a douche bag in the gym, next to the squat rack, bumped into the bar, and the weight of the bar completely shifted to my right side.

I thought at first it was just a muscle strain, but after a year of dieting and squatting + deadlifting, it caught up with me and eventually the disc got herniated while i was walking in a mall on a business trip for work!!

MT