[SRS] Depression Discussion and Support Thread Part II

[pondus_levo]

BTP, I've been going though a bit of depression with my divorce and what helps me most is practicing self-compassion.

http://self-compassion.org/the-three...-compassion-2/
http://self-compassion.org/category/exercises/

I would recommend just reading the whole website and watching her videos.

[gizmo33]

Hey everyone. I used to be depressed clinically but now I think i'm just average depressed. I don't know what will work for anyone but I'm much happier recently. I got a dumb little retail job and that's sort of my culture right now: People who work retail. Some of them have high goals and some have low goals. Many are incredibly hard working people and it's easy to forget that the people who work our grocery or clothing stores may have greater ideals beyond sticking around for rest of their lives. Getting acquainted with these people made me realize I had something in myself as well.

[vequalsixr]

Today is a new day everyone.

[ZyraThornrise]

Update on the tumors:
Doctor wants to "wait and see". She said that they are in a position that could be difficult to remove surgically, so she wants to wait to see if they are growing to start a medication treatment instead. I have to get off of my psychiatric meds in the mean time, which means very scary times ahead.

[Deathstroke]

Update on the tumors:
Doctor wants to "wait and see". She said that they are in a position that could be difficult to remove surgically, so she wants to wait to see if they are growing to start a medication treatment instead. I have to get off of my psychiatric meds in the mean time, which means very scary times ahead.

It sounds like it. There's no plan they can come up with to keep the psych conditions in check? Best of luck really, I hope that they don't need to wait too long. Are you weaning off them or need to go off cold turkey if even possible?

[300BLK]

Update on the tumors:
Doctor wants to "wait and see". She said that they are in a position that could be difficult to remove surgically, so she wants to wait to see if they are growing to start a medication treatment instead. I have to get off of my psychiatric meds in the mean time, which means very scary times ahead.

My best wishes to you. I have nothing else to say but that.

[VocelLoser]

I just had a massive anxiety attack again.

Thinking about all the chit I didn't do as a kid, the chit I missed out on as a kid, the invaluable life lessons and skills that I never received from my father, how I can't drive, how I was told I was worthless and useless and a piece of ****, how I was used as a scapegoat by my own mother, how my parents never once tried to know who I was as a person, how little they really tried to improve my life and expose me to new things, I can't get over it. I try every day to bury it, to let it go, to learn from it, but it just comes back as evidence of how right my father was about me. I let him get to me as a kid, and I know I was young as fuk and impressionable, but why the fuk didn't I try to prove him wrong when I aged? I just sat there and allowed him to beat me down.

I can't stand how he never showed me how to fish, how to change the oil in a car, how to build anything, how to be confident, and how he never once made an attempt to understand my personality and tailor his parenting methods to my own personal needs, and put me in things I'd actually be interested in. He's just a bum who has no interests and only cared to push me along in school because he never got his degree. I never had a true family, I never learned how to be a normal person, I can't share experiences with anybody except degenerates it seems, and now I'm an adult man-child with absolutely nothing to show, nothing to offer, and nothing to gain. I can't get past the anxiety, I can't get past my past, I'm just stuck in one spot that I tried desperately to crawl out of years ago. Fuk, bros.. I don't know what to do anymore.

[bongowongo]

Today is a new day everyone.

A new day of hating myself and knowing Im a failure .. yay lel.

[BigTimePlayer]

A new day of hating myself and knowing Im a failure .. yay lel.

Yeah brah, I was severely fukked up earlier today when having to go to work in the morning. It was so depressing when looking at the parkway while driving that everyone was driving down the shore while I had to go to work. I never have anyone to do **** with so it's just going to be another summer of nothingness. Also have to work all day 4th of July as well. I just fukin hate my life with a passion. My job is also making me lose it a lot of the time since all I constantly see every single fukin day is couples together & it's driving me insane. Sometimes when I see attractive women I'm just thinking like fuk off u fukin kunt & other **** without them even doing anything to me. I just get really angry about it. I just a lot of the time hate them being in my presence since all it does is remind me of how I'll likely never have a girlfriend with the way I am.

[EmperorRyker]

Yeah brah, I was severely fukked up earlier today when having to go to work in the morning. It was so depressing when looking at the parkway while driving that everyone was driving down the shore while I had to go to work. I never have anyone to do **** with so it's just going to be another summer of nothingness. Also have to work all day 4th of July as well. I just fukin hate my life with a passion. My job is also making me lose it a lot of the time since all I constantly see every single fukin day is couples together & it's driving me insane. Sometimes when I see attractive women I'm just thinking like fuk off u fukin kunt & other **** without them even doing anything to me. I just get really angry about it. I just a lot of the time hate them being in my presence since all it does is remind me of how I'll likely never have a girlfriend with the way I am.

What do you do to meet people?

[BigTimePlayer]

What do you do to meet people?

I just mainly go to the gym & don't do anything else. Where am I going to meet people? I talk to a few people that I consider friends & actually hung out with them a few weeks ago when they came around my area for some show. But they all have their own lives & **** in terms of having girlfriends or living by other people that are way closer to them that are easier to hang out with. It just fukin sucks being in this position. It's destroying me on a daily basis that I'm in this fukked up predicament.

[EmperorRyker]

I just mainly go to the gym & don't do anything else. Where am I going to meet people? I talk to a few people that I consider friends & actually hung out with them a few weeks ago when they came around my area for some show. But they all have their own lives & **** in terms of having girlfriends or living by other people that are way closer to them that are easier to hang out with. It just fukin sucks being in this position. It's destroying me on a daily basis that I'm in this fukked up predicament.

Look, dude, I get it that you're not feeling good about your life, but you need to stop bitching and try to turn things around. If you try it something and it doesn't work, then come back and bitch. But you've been complaining about the same things for months now and what have you changed? Start going out. If you're into music, start going to shows. If you're into art, check some exhibitions and talk to people there. If you're into comedy, go to a local comedy club. Meet with girls from Tinder. Check meetups in your area for other interests. If you keep doing the same thing, nothing's going to change. Make an effort.

[BigTimePlayer]

Look, dude, I get it that you're not feeling good about your life, but you need to stop bitching and try to turn things around. If you try it something and it doesn't work, then come back and bitch. But you've been complaining about the same things for months now and what have you changed? Start going out. If you're into music, start going to shows. If you're into art, check some exhibitions and talk to people there. If you're into comedy, go to a local comedy club. Meet with girls from Tinder. Check meetups in your area for other interests. If you keep doing the same thing, nothing's going to change. Make an effort.

But it seems no one has to put that much effort into **** which is what's annoying. Everyone else seems to have everything in place where they don't have to force themselves to do ****. I just don't get how some people have a natural ability in getting women or having dozens of friends that they can easily hang out with. Also Tinder is just a joke, all the convos just always end or the woman never even replies at all. I'm actually chatting somewhat with some women right now but I expect the same thing to happen with her too. Can't tell what her interest level is at the moment since she's only replied to me once today when I was at work. I responded back but haven't heard back from her yet. It seems the women I message are either just doing it for ego boosting or I'm just option #10 to them where they have other guys they rather chat with since they get 50 matches a day. I've tried the meetup.com site awhile back, all the stuff on there is way too far from me.

[EmperorRyker]

But it seems no one has to put that much effort into **** which is what's annoying. Everyone else seems to have everything in place where they don't have to force themselves to do ****. I just don't get how some people have a natural ability in getting women or having dozens of friends that they can easily hang out with. Also Tinder is just a joke, all the convos just always end or the woman never even replies at all. It seems the women I message are either just doing it for ego boosting or I'm just option #10 to them where they have other guys they rather chat with since they get 50 matches a day. I've tried the meetup.com site awhile back, all the stuff on there is way too far from me.

First of all, that's bulls. Other people have to try, too. *I* have to try. I've been a hermit for 7-8 years, and now I'm making an effort to change things. I started going to shows a lot again, and while I haven't met too many new people yet, it's just a matter of time, because I see the same people there all the time. Just make small talk to open up the conversation and start making acquaintances.

Secondly, who cares if you do have to put in more effort? It's still a choice of whether you do it and get some results, or you don't and things stay the same. What does it matter what effort others have to put in? Either you want it or not. Same with Tinder. So you're not going to win them all, so what? Just keep talking to them and have fun with it. If you're trying to impress all the time, you won't get anywhere and you also won't have fun doing it. And this option #10 business is also stupid. Yeah, you probably are option #10 for some of them. But if you didn't have this defeatist attitude, you might move up with some of them, too. At the end of the day, that's what matters, not where you start. You just need to be pass a certain threshold to have a girl interested, and from there on it's the personality that matters.

[BigTimePlayer]

First of all, that's bulls. Other people have to try, too. *I* have to try. I've been a hermit for 7-8 years, and now I'm making an effort to change things. I started going to shows a lot again, and while I haven't met too many new people yet, it's just a matter of time, because I see the same people there all the time. Just make small talk to open up the conversation and start making acquaintances.

Secondly, who cares if you do have to put in more effort? It's still a choice of whether you do it and get some results, or you don't and things stay the same. What does it matter what effort others have to put in? Either you want it or not. Same with Tinder. So you're not going to win them all, so what? Just keep talking to them and have fun with it. If you're trying to impress all the time, you won't get anywhere and you also won't have fun doing it. And this option #10 business is also stupid. Yeah, you probably are option #10 for some of them. But if you didn't have this defeatist attitude, you might move up with some of them, too. At the end of the day, that's what matters, not where you start. You just need to be pass a certain threshold to have a girl interested, and from there on it's the personality that matters.

The thing is I'm highly likely not finding a relationship material woman through Tinder. Someone to have sex or FWB maybe, but I don't think I'd want to date a woman from Tinder for anything serious. I was really close to considering just deleting it altogether but than that girl messaged me today earlier again after us chatting last night. She hasn't responded back yet again though. It says she lives 2 miles from me so she's really close, should I just ask for her number or what the next time if/when she replies? I just hate wasting my time though if I'm always just going to never be a top option for them. Who wants to be with someone that's going to choose others first before you if she had multiple options at once. I know I wouldn't want to be the guy with a woman if for instance she went out with 3 other guys before me that she liked more for whatever reason but it didn't work out with them so she gave me a chance afterwards. It would always bother me knowing I was never her top choice even if it turned out she liked me more than the guys she gave a chance to first.

And I get that, but it just sucks that I'd have to put in a ridiculous amount of effort that's pretty much just a natural thing for others. Basically I feel I screwed up by never keeping in touch with anyone from high school or anything. Wasn't entirely my own fault with all of them though since a lot of them basically just stopped talking to me never to hear from them again. Now I'm in a position where I have no one to hang out with really. As I said I have a few people I consider friends but they live way too far to ever hang out with them regularly or are too busy.

[extendlol]

Brahs, no need to stress about girls. Focus on your career and making money and the women will come along the way. Thats what i am starting to do. Sure having a **** buddy every weekend would be cool but it's just pleasure..

If you're looking for a relationship and you arn't mentally 'there' like alot of us, it will fail. I used to think that finding a girlfriend would complete me, heres a nice quote i found:

A good relationship brings 2 complete people together enhancing the individuals, NOT 1/2 ****ed up people into one "completed" mess.

[SomedayIllBeMe]

Do you live in other peoples shoes? It probably seems like other people don't put in effort, and only you do, because you've spend 0 hours experiencing their life and 24/7 experiencing yours. It's like when you see an excellent musician play; they make it look effortless, when in reality they put in thousands of hours of practice that you never saw.

And even if everyone else did get a free easy pass through life, so what? Does getting annoyed or complaining about it make your life any better? No, it never does, so that is a useless thought to dwell on. Work on yourself, maximize yourself in every way you can, and lighten up. If you're neurotically angry, annoyed, and hateful, then no one is ever going to like you. Take a step back, a deep breath, and go forth believing that you can and will make your life better.

[BigTimePlayer]

Brahs, no need to stress about girls. Focus on your career and making money and the women will come along the way. Thats what i am starting to do. Sure having a **** buddy every weekend would be cool but it's just pleasure..

If you're looking for a relationship and you arn't mentally 'there' like alot of us, it will fail. I used to think that finding a girlfriend would complete me, heres a nice quote i found:

A good relationship brings 2 complete people together enhancing the individuals, NOT 1/2 ****ed up people into one "completed" mess.

My job is just driving me insane though in terms of always constantly seeing couples. It's like in my mind I feel like it keeps getting rubbed in my face over & over & over again even though I know no one means to make me feel like **** since they're not doing anything to me. But it's just horrible to keep being reminded that I'm not good or well enough to date anyone for a serious relationship. I feel I need to get another job away from people like in a warehouse or something away from seeing good looking women & couples all the time.

[EmperorRyker]

My job is just driving me insane though in terms of always constantly seeing couples. It's like in my mind I feel like it keeps getting rubbed in my face over & over & over again even though I know no one means to make me feel like **** since they're not doing anything to me. But it's just horrible to keep being reminded that I'm not good or well enough to date anyone for a serious relationship. I feel I need to get another job away from people like in a warehouse or something away from seeing good looking women & couples all the time.

No job change will ever help you with this. And if you think you're bombarded with couples and good looking women in a warehouse, I've got news for you. If you want to live in civilization, you'll see these things, so if you refuse to work on yourself, go live with the wolves where there are no triggers.

[extendlol]

My job is just driving me insane though in terms of always constantly seeing couples. It's like in my mind I feel like it keeps getting rubbed in my face over & over & over again even though I know no one means to make me feel like **** since they're not doing anything to me. But it's just horrible to keep being reminded that I'm not good or well enough to date anyone for a serious relationship. I feel I need to get another job away from people like in a warehouse or something away from seeing good looking women & couples all the time.

Just think about the stress you don't have dealing with stupid women all the time. Lifes too short to worry about women

[BigTimePlayer]

Just think about the stress you don't have dealing with stupid women all the time. Lifes too short to worry about women

It's easier said than done when you have little to no experience with women. How am I supposed to stop thinking about it though? All I constantly see are couples all the time so how can I just shut my mind off from it & not let it bother me? I don't want to wake up & be 45 & never have had sex or a relationship before. If I don't worry about it nothing will happen but if I do than it just depresses & stresses me out.

[extendlol]

It's easier said than done when you have little to no experience with women. I don't want to wake up & be 45 & never have had sex or a relationship before. If I don't worry about it nothing will happen but if I do than it just depresses & stresses me out.

Lol brah sex is over rated. All the girls i had sex with i got a better experience with my hand.

[BigTimePlayer]

Lol brah sex is over rated. All the girls i had sex with i got a better experience with my hand.

Haven't heard many people say sex is over rated. Maybe you just had bad luck with being with women that didn't know how to have good sex.

[duglosh]

Does anyone regret admitting that they are depressed to friends and family. I feel like it done major damage that I cant recover from. I have major social anxiety which is probably the reason I feel like this

[EmperorRyker]

Does anyone regret admitting that they are depressed to friends and family. I feel like it done major damage that I cant recover from. I have major social anxiety which is probably the reason I feel like this

Major damage in what way? I don't regret it, no. If they're not supportive, they can fuck right off, family included.

[duglosh]

Major damage in what way? I don't regret it, no. If they're not supportive, they can fuck right off, family included.

As though I have lost respect and now that I have this label I cant shake it. I feel like it has weakened me as a man or something

[300BLK]

Does anyone regret admitting that they are depressed to friends and family. I feel like it done major damage that I cant recover from. I have major social anxiety which is probably the reason I feel like this

As though I have lost respect and now that I have this label I cant shake it. I feel like it has weakened me as a man or something

When you try to own up to your illness, especially a impairing one, some people try to treat you like you're special. If you feel like the illness doesn't have control over you, as people may think, you just got to tell them to **** off, really.

I can relate, because when I tried to own up to schizophrenia, some people just can't look past it, and that's all they see. People that had no problem talking to you or interacting with you before, and now they put up this wall of fear or sympathy, and it does make you feel less of a man, not even just a man, but a person. Some people you will never meet ends with, but I know people in my personal life, such as friends and family, I had to show them there was nothing wrong with me, by telling them to **** off, I'm not "special", and just being myself, a normal person, and now they don't believe I have it.

Now my next step is getting my diagnosis changed. I think I have something, but it's not schizophrenia, I can't even relate to them, from all the ones I talked to or seen. I don't even take medications at all anymore, and I function pretty normal as anyone can see, as people who are really schizophrenic/bipolar/etc really can't be off medication. Those meds actually made me worse that I didn't realize before, made me more manic and autistic, not to offend anyone here, but when people are trying to tell you something over and over, naturally you start to believe it, until then you realize, they were wrong the whole time.

[DizzySmalls]

Does anyone regret admitting that they are depressed to friends and family. I feel like it done major damage that I cant recover from. I have major social anxiety which is probably the reason I feel like this

It's one of those things that you never really get a positive effect from sharing. I don't feel a great deal of regret for the people I have explained things to, but I know better than to do so in the future.

[Kabamaro]

I went out tonight alone but I quickly felt lonely and I'm still feeling down

I wish I have friends

[hidingwithmusic]

My health is still improving with the vitamin d, but my face hasn't been getting better. I want my skinny face back. Math class hasn't been that we'll either. I can study hard enough to feel good enough for an outcome of an A and after I'm done with the test I'd feel like I'll get a C. The teacher is pretty hard. On the first day there was 37 of us and now maybe 8 still here. I want a B in the class because this is a very important grade because it's one of my prerequisites for the nursing program. I'm going to work ahead right after I'm done writing this and start the very next section for tuesday. I hope the rest of you guys are doing better.