My journey to find balance

[dreahere]

Thinking of you...

[gobbles23]

*hugs* Hope everything turns out ok!!!! Will be thinking of you and hoping for the best all day....

[Redfizz]

Good morning, MM!

I hope all is well. Enjoy this wonderful spring rain!

[marathonmom262]

Hi ladies!!

Thank you so much for thinking of me the last few days. I am seriously so grateful for each of you!!!

Still so far so good. Doc was not concerned about the slight separation, it is common and generally heals itself. He did not say how big it is but since he didn't even put me on pelvic rest let alone bed rest I must be just fine.

Speaking of pelvic rest - my poor husband... I am just sick as a dog and can give absolutely no thought to quality time with him I am literally feeling extremely hung over during every waking and sleeping moment. I wake up in the night and feel the need to be sick! So now of course I am ridiculously tired. I miss the gym - I always got the BEST sleep on workout days!

I'm just hoping I am hitting the peak of it since I'm around 8 weeks and hopefully in another week or two the nausea will subside a bit. I'm so freaking bloated too from eating lots of bland carbs haha - on the plus side my boobs are glorious

Tomorrow I go for some routine bloodwork then nothing until April 8. That will be a scary day - basically will go in to attempt to hear the heartbeat. If it's there and strong this little bean and I can do a little happy dance together because then I will finally feel okay about things. About a week or so later I will then have another ultrasound so I'll get to see my little one really move for the first time!

At that point, unless the doc advises against it which I doubt, I am all in for hitting up the weights!!!

I am working from home tomorrow and will hopefully have some time to spend peaking in to all of your journals! I feel so behind on what is going on in here - I've been so caught up in my nausea haha

Keep rocking it out for me ladies!!!

[Redfizz]

Woooo!



(Man, I am getting a lot of use out of this one. There are so many angels to be high-fived today!)

Speaking of pelvic rest - my poor husband... I am just sick as a dog and can give absolutely no thought to quality time with him I am literally feeling extremely hung over during every waking and sleeping moment. I wake up in the night and feel the need to be sick! So now of course I am ridiculously tired. I miss the gym - I always got the BEST sleep on workout days!

You know, Dutchess Kate also had a horrible time with being sick. Have you tried putting a pea under your mattress just to check things out?

[jjeane]

Happy dancing for you MM!! I hope the sickness passes soon. It can be really rough.

[dreahere]

You know, Dutchess Kate also had a horrible time with being sick. Have you tried putting a pea under your mattress just to check things out?

I thought the same thing! Heh.

Isn't it supposed to be a good sign for the health of the developing bebe if mom has horrible morning sickness or is that an old wives' tale? I still (27 years later) remember how horrible mine was and, since I didn't want to tell my co-workers I was pregnant yet, everyone just thought I was dying, LOL. Hope it lets up really really soon, sweetie.

P.S. I had never heard the term pelvic rest till after my hysterectomy and I find it a fairly hilarious euphemism for some reason.

[marathonmom262]

Woooo!

You know, Dutchess Kate also had a horrible time with being sick. Have you tried putting a pea under your mattress just to check things out?

Love the angel high-fives! Haha - well as much as the hubs is pampering me like a sick little princess I sure don't feel like one Maybe I should give my friend the duchess a call and see if she has any tips for me!

Happy dancing for you MM!! I hope the sickness passes soon. It can be really rough.

Thanks jj! Yup - I just keep telling myself it could be worse, I feel terrible but at least I'm not getting sick constantly like a lot of ladies do. I guess I should consider myself somewhat lucky!

I thought the same thing! Heh.

Isn't it supposed to be a good sign for the health of the developing bebe if mom has horrible morning sickness or is that an old wives' tale? I still (27 years later) remember how horrible mine was and, since I didn't want to tell my co-workers I was pregnant yet, everyone just thought I was dying, LOL. Hope it lets up really really soon, sweetie.

P.S. I had never heard the term pelvic rest till after my hysterectomy and I find it a fairly hilarious euphemism for some reason.

Haha - you know I had a little more nausea with my first (a girl - so that wives tale kind of came out true) and more exhaustion with my second (although that was likely more to do with the first being a toddler...) - I will say the old wives tale about boys sucking the life out of your hair is true. I had really gorgeous hair before I got pregnant with my son and now it's so frizzy!

I do think that the sickness means my hormones are going strong so that is a good thing. What sucked about my pregnancy last fall is that I was really really ill for like 3 weeks after the baby had no longer continued. Here I was thinking - oh the sickness is good - meanwhile it was all for nothing I guess the hormones keep going in your body for a while after a missed miscarriage (weird that they call it that) because your body is still trying to support the pregnancy and doesn't really know the baby hasn't survived.

I think my coworkers think I have cancer. I've had to work from home almost once a week for various appointments (thank goodness because I need the one day to not actually wear my tight pants to work over my bloated body and feel sick at my office desk all day!!) - a few days ago a coworker came over and asked how I was doing. I said "I'm okay". He gave me a really strange and serious look and said "Are you really okay?". I just laughed and said I wasn't quite caught up on the time change and was tired. I know I looked like death because it was the very worst day I've had yet. I am convinced they think I have cancer!

Good ole pelvic rest - I hadn't heard of it until my sister was put on pelvic rest for both of her IVF pregnancies. I guess I am somewhat on a self-imposed pelvic rest - I think even if I felt better I'd be too scared to do anything to mess things up so I want my pelvis to stay well-rested

[dreahere]

I do think that the sickness means my hormones are going strong so that is a good thing. What sucked about my pregnancy last fall is that I was really really ill for like 3 weeks after the baby had no longer continued. Here I was thinking - oh the sickness is good - meanwhile it was all for nothing I guess the hormones keep going in your body for a while after a missed miscarriage (weird that they call it that) because your body is still trying to support the pregnancy and doesn't really know the baby hasn't survived.

Mother Nature sucks sometimes

Good ole pelvic rest - I hadn't heard of it until my sister was put on pelvic rest for both of her IVF pregnancies. I guess I am somewhat on a self-imposed pelvic rest - I think even if I felt better I'd be too scared to do anything to mess things up so I want my pelvis to stay well-rested

You should see the ladies on pelvic rest on the hysterectomy forums freaking out b/c they've had female wet dreams. "OMG I SWEAR I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE!" hahaha

[Cardioconvert]

Thinking of you MM and big hugs your way.

Your April appointment can't come soon enough I bet!

CC

[gobbles23]

*hugs!*

[DieselsMom]

Glad to hear things are still progress well - can't wait til the next appointment

[swooshie]

Oh my goodness.....how have I missed all of this???? I'm so sorry MM that I haven't been in your journal. I'm sitting here late Sunday night stalling going to bed because tomorrow starts another work week and I pop into your journal to find ..... work! My work!!! You do know what I do for work.....right? (OB/GYN nurse)

I think the placental separation your doc mentioned is probably a subchorionic hematoma and they can cause some vaginal bleeding, which scares the bajeebers out of every pregnant woman, but if the bleeding is coming from the subchorionic hematoma they usually just keep an eye on it through ultrasounds and the risk is very low that it is associated with a miscarriage.

Did I read correctly that you've had 3 D&Cs for miscarriages??? If so, has your doctor ordered any coagulation studies (blood clotting disorders)? Have they talked about starting you on aspirin therapy? If I did read that right, I would ask your OB about that.

I don't mean to sound like a know-it-all, but I've worked in obstetrics for almost 20 years, so I can probably translate the "doctor speak" for you

Good luck, MM! I'll be thinking about you and I'll pop in this journal a heck of a whole lot more often!

[Redfizz]

Dawww, I love Nurse Swoosh. She's always got our backs.

[marathonmom262]

Mother Nature sucks sometimes

You should see the ladies on pelvic rest on the hysterectomy forums freaking out b/c they've had female wet dreams. "OMG I SWEAR I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE!" hahaha

Bwahahahaha - that is hilarious. I did have one week where I was having some pretty vivid dreams but not quite *that* good haha. Then I started feeling nauseous all night long and sadly the sweet dreams have not returned!

Thinking of you MM and big hugs your way.

Your April appointment can't come soon enough I bet!

CC

Thank you!! Almost half way to that next appt, and I definitely have a growing bump going on so I am trying to take comfort in visible progress happening

*hugs!*

Thank you!!! Hugs back at you pretty lady!

Glad to hear things are still progress well - can't wait til the next appointment

Thanks!! I just can't wait to get through that one - because then a week and a half later we will have another ultrasound done for first trimester screening. I never did that one with my other kids but since I'm "old" now as long as I can afford it I'll take another glimpse of baby and get all of the data I can about this little one!

[jjeane]

Hey MM! Glad things are doing going well.
I hope you have old maternity clothes or they have cool ones this season. I remember both times I was preggers the maternity selection was terrible. I was like, do you just want me to look like a barn or something?
Hugs and good thoughts your way!

[marathonmom262]

Oh my goodness.....how have I missed all of this???? I'm so sorry MM that I haven't been in your journal. I'm sitting here late Sunday night stalling going to bed because tomorrow starts another work week and I pop into your journal to find ..... work! My work!!! You do know what I do for work.....right? (OB/GYN nurse)

I think the placental separation your doc mentioned is probably a subchorionic hematoma and they can cause some vaginal bleeding, which scares the bajeebers out of every pregnant woman, but if the bleeding is coming from the subchorionic hematoma they usually just keep an eye on it through ultrasounds and the risk is very low that it is associated with a miscarriage.

Did I read correctly that you've had 3 D&Cs for miscarriages??? If so, has your doctor ordered any coagulation studies (blood clotting disorders)? Have they talked about starting you on aspirin therapy? If I did read that right, I would ask your OB about that.

I don't mean to sound like a know-it-all, but I've worked in obstetrics for almost 20 years, so I can probably translate the "doctor speak" for you

Good luck, MM! I'll be thinking about you and I'll pop in this journal a heck of a whole lot more often!

Hi swoosh! I have been THE worst journal friend and have not been able to keep up with everyone else for about a month now. I am too dizzy and nauseous to look at the forums on my phone so I've had to take a bit of a break!

I've had 3 losses - but actually 4 D&Cs! Last fall I had one and then was back in the emergency a few days later with a uterus full of blood and had to have it all over again (makes me think about what you said because likely a clot is what caused my uterus to fill instead of drain!). Two of the three I believe were blighted ovums. I know the first one was which happened before my 2 kids, then I have had 2 after my kids within the last year and a half. I don't know what happened with the first of these because I never had an early ultrasound so could have been a blighted ovum, with the second I actually saw a heartbeat around 7 weeks but found out 4 weeks later the baby hadn't made it but another day or so past that u/s based on measurements. I never had any bleeding - but part of me wonders if it was a SCH that wasn't seen on the u/s and all of my running caused some problems (hence I'm a fat lazy turd this time around!)

I haven't had any bleeding with this one either so the SCH must be very small. My doc hasn't mentioned anything beyond the typical blood tests for first trimester which have always come back fine (I don't know if coag is part of that?) and aspirin therapy hasn't come up either. I think because I have two kids all 4 doctors at the center have basically considered that the embryos were not meant to be. I asked a lot of questions after the last loss because I felt like my batting average was 2 for 5 at that point and I was hitting 35 so was I being stupid to keep trying? Are my eggs all bad? I didn't want to push something that maybe was just not supposed to happen but they all felt like I had nothing wrong with me (although I do have a tilted uterus but was told that isn't an issue). I will definitely ask at my next appt about the things you mentioned specifically - I'm grateful you took the time to tell me about that!!

It's funny - I'm only somewhere close to 9 weeks and I feel like maybe I feel a little movement down there. I know most of the time it's just gas (because I am like a balloon these days), but sometimes I feel some of those odd "flippy" feelings that make me think it was the baby and it gives me a little hope to hold on to for the next few weeks until I know for sure.

Thank you so much for checking in on me!!!

Dawww, I love Nurse Swoosh. She's always got our backs.

Heck yes she does!!

[DieselsMom]

so happy to hear things are going well so far, keeping fingers, toes and eyes crossed

[marathonmom262]

so happy to hear things are going well so far, keeping fingers, toes and eyes crossed

Hehe thanks DM! But you can uncross those eyes - you've had way too many run-ins with deer over the last few months, I want you to be able to see them properly when they are coming at you

Now if I could just start feeling like my eyes weren't crossed all the time! Definitely getting a little better - don't feel incredibly horrible all day every day but I do prefer having actually drank a few glasses of wine the night before if I'm going to feel like this in the morning!

[marathonmom262]

Random drive by post!!

So this weekend we celebrated my daughter's 6th birthday at a place where they have tons of bounce houses and big blowup slides and fun stuff like that. She had about 20 little sweaty crazy kiddos to join her and they had SO much fun. I spent a small fortune (between the party rental, food, goodie bags, etc) of about $600 but felt like the best parent ever when I saw how much fun both of my kids had.

Sadly some of that fortune is going to waste as I WAY over ordered on the pizza. 5 pizzas came home with us!!! I have eaten more pizza since Saturday than I have in like 3 years. I even got a casserole recipe for dinner last night to try to disguise the pizza. The result - I had been feeling a little better but after 3 days of pizza I am seriously ill today!! We are tossing whatever is left!!

So my tiny little beauty turns 6 today actually and we are taking her out to eat to a diner that has great food and amazing desserts. I cannot wait to order a big salad with chicken on it haha I still cannot believe she is 6 - I have been looking at baby and toddler pictures of her all day and getting all emotional (thanks over active hormones).

The countdown to my next appt is steadily progressing - really happy to be less than 2 weeks away. The last 2 weeks went really fast so hopefully these will too. Starting to really show - friends are actually asking now. My belly is starting to poof a little but the big thing is the bewbs. Had a friend give me some clothes and all of the small shirts were ready to bust at the seems at the chest. Bummer because I really need more flowy shirts to hide for the next 3 weeks until we will actually tell people!! Guess I'll be forced to do some shopping this week...

Hope everyone is having a great week! Can't wait to actually post some BB related stuff here in a couple of weeks (fingers crossed!!)

[DieselsMom]

Ahh 6 - happy birthday to mini MM.

Love that age and hate that age all in one lol. We did a bouncer rental last year for the kids party (their birthdays are a month apart so we usually just do one party to save on costs and get better commitment from people) and all the kids had fun as well as the adults. It was on of those 40' obstacle ones.

Glad things are still going well - I will uncross my eyes for driving and working out purposes but do think of you and your bean often. Hope the next two weeks go as quickly as the last two

[jjeane]

Oh Birthday fun!!!!! We do small family birthdays cause I am a party loser. My kids would love you!
I too think about you and the little bean. Always hoping it is going well. Oh shopping, have fun! Keep us posted!

[Echo814]

Awe! Sounds like your little girl had an awesome time Glad everyone had a great time.

Hope all is well with you and the bean The first thing to really show on me was the bewbs, I am so surprised that it didn't click with me when I commented to Jim "Man, my bewbs look bigger and are kinda sensitive." yeah shoulda been a good hint lol. Still sending positive thoughts and good juju your way.

[dreahere]

I love six year olds. I think that's my favorite age.

[marathonmom262]

Ahh 6 - happy birthday to mini MM.

Love that age and hate that age all in one lol. We did a bouncer rental last year for the kids party (their birthdays are a month apart so we usually just do one party to save on costs and get better commitment from people) and all the kids had fun as well as the adults. It was on of those 40' obstacle ones.

Glad things are still going well - I will uncross my eyes for driving and working out purposes but do think of you and your bean often. Hope the next two weeks go as quickly as the last two

Haha - I hear you on the love and hate - I think my daughter brings more and more drama with each year

The obstacle course blowup things are my favorite! I love climbing the rope walls and sliding and all of that stuff. It was kind of a bummer that I needed to stay on the sidelines for the party - plus I took the kids there again for a fundraiser last night with other kids from the daycare and I wanted to play SO badly!!

Just a little more than a week to go!!!

Oh Birthday fun!!!!! We do small family birthdays cause I am a party loser. My kids would love you!
I too think about you and the little bean. Always hoping it is going well. Oh shopping, have fun! Keep us posted!

Hehe - we've always just done family dinner parties at the house because I have never wanted to spend the money but I decided to go for it this year. Next year I may consider doing something again but combining for both kids since they are only just over a month apart with their birthdays. Who knows - we might be feeling really poor this time next year with another little person in diapers

I did go to Kohl's on Wednesday and bought a couple of "regular" shirts in L or XL. Luckily I noticed that flowy shirts are really in this year so I got a couple of cute light-weight flowy tops that I can wear tanks under and wear some tights and high-heeled boots to work and still look nice. I think people are starting to look at me more and more. A friend even flat out asked me at work this week if I was pregnant! Most of it is bloating but... I guess it's just starting to get too obvious!

Awe! Sounds like your little girl had an awesome time Glad everyone had a great time.

Hope all is well with you and the bean The first thing to really show on me was the bewbs, I am so surprised that it didn't click with me when I commented to Jim "Man, my bewbs look bigger and are kinda sensitive." yeah shoulda been a good hint lol. Still sending positive thoughts and good juju your way.

Haha - it is really crazy how quickly they will grow for some people. I'm up at least one cup size already! Luckily the soreness is going away this week - it's nice having big bewbs but not when they actually feel like bowling balls attached to your rib cage

I love six year olds. I think that's my favorite age.

I love my little six year old - she is just ridiculously smart and she always blows me away with her brains and her heart. I can't wait to see what is in store for her over the next year!

[rickiecoombs]

April 8th is so soon! I will be back "home" by then! I guess I will recommence the rocking back-and-forth in fetal position in a day or two.

Thinking of you - hope all is well. So exciting to be able to creep you on ******** now!

At the airport now, waiting for a flight to get me halfway "home" - just trying to check in, 'cause I've been MIA for a week. And a week on bb.com is like a year in real life!

Can't wait to hear about Monday's appointment!!

<3 Rickie

[marathonmom262]

April 8th is so soon! I will be back "home" by then! I guess I will recommence the rocking back-and-forth in fetal position in a day or two.

Thinking of you - hope all is well. So exciting to be able to creep you on ******** now!

At the airport now, waiting for a flight to get me halfway "home" - just trying to check in, 'cause I've been MIA for a week. And a week on bb.com is like a year in real life!

Can't wait to hear about Monday's appointment!!

<3 Rickie

Thanks rickie!! I can't believe it is here already - I am a huge bundle of nerves :/

I love that we are FB friends now! Hopefully you'll see me post some good news on there late next week if things turn out okay between today and next week's ultrasound. I'll want to make sure I have time to talk to family first and then I'll probably post something on there. But let's not get ahead of myself too quickly...

So big appt today. Really hoping they will be able to hear the HB on the doppler otherwise I'll probably have a day or two wait to get an ultrasound scheduled. Busy week all around - our house is a construction zone... electric was done on my new walk-in closet Saturday and sheetrock went up all day yesterday in the closet and the new wall on the other side that is now a smaller 4th bedroom (future nursery hopefully!). Also expecting to get my offer letter for my new job today now that the "new" 12-month wait time has expired and they can legally offer me a job. My current employer spoke with my new company and I know things are amicable and there will be no legal trouble but they have requested I stay through the end of the month.

So step 1 - getting through today's appointment. Will hopefully have good stuff to report back soon

PS - I am SO fat. As of this morning I have gained 9.5 lbs over the last 7.5 weeks. I know it's mostly from eating bland carbs non-stop to avoid getting sick - did the same thing with my son and things evened out after the first trimester just fine but sheesh! I keep telling myself there is an extra 2.5 lbs in each bewb but I know I've got some extra flub everywhere - especially some extra padding on my belly where I'm holding tons of water too. I'm pretty grossed out but know this is temporary and for a good reason plus I'll feel better when I know things are progressing okay and I can get back to the gym to do some decent lifting and walking the TM (plus it's nice here as of this week - will be in the 70s!!! yay!!!)

[rickiecoombs]

Oh, I'm so glad you posted!! I've been checking back like a crazy lady. Haha.

Hoping to hear good news here later today! Thinking about you! <3

PS. I don't know if you remember the convo we had about my sister's (unborn at the time) baby - but you were right. I wasn't jealous and bitter. I was in love. Thanks for talking to me about that at the time. You're wonderful.

[marathonmom262]

PS. I don't know if you remember the convo we had about my sister's (unborn at the time) baby - but you were right. I wasn't jealous and bitter. I was in love. Thanks for talking to me about that at the time. You're wonderful.

Of course I remember! I knew you would feel the same way I did in a similar situation - it's really quite amazing the love that you feel I saw your picture on FB of you holding that sweet tiny little bald person and loving it - it made me smile a huge deliriously happy smile

[jjeane]

Good luck today MM!! Been thinking about you.