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  1. #1
    Strong-Ass Jaw Crew nitr0x2's Avatar
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    Best rap punchlines

    post up the best rap punchlines you've heard
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  2. #2
    I'm a guy. Mrs Grudge's Avatar
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    I'm like stevie wonder I can't see a brother beating me ~ Lord finesse
    Access the gun's off the earth axis
    Axis of evil, the eagle will leave your hat split
    Ruck flow is like "**** you, Gawd"
    I don't wanna rhyme, I need a construction job



    - Sean Price
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  3. #3
    Iron Addiction A FREAK's Avatar
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    Eazy E on the song straight outta compton- "My identity by itself causes violence"
    "You are what your deep, driving desire is.
    As your desire is, so is your will.
    As your will is, so is your deed.
    As your deed is, so is your destiny"
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  4. #4
    #33, RB Mad Dog162's Avatar
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    Yeah I sampled your voice, you were using it wrong. You made it a hot line, I made it a hot song.

    Actually, the whole of Takeover, by Jay-Z is a great rap diss.

    This man ain't no mother-****in' MC / I know everything he's got to say against me / I am white, I am a ****ing bum / I do live in a trailer with my mom / My boy future is an Uncle Tom / I do got a dumb friend named Cheddar Bob / Who shoots himself in the leg with his own gun / I did get jumped by all six of you chumps / And Wink did **** my girl / I'm still standing here screaming "**** the Free World."

    And, "You never gonna judge me, though / 'Cause you don't know what the **** I've been through / But I know something about you / You went to Cranbrook - that's a private school / What's the matter, dog? / You're embarrassed? / This guy's a gangster? / His real name is Clarence / And Clarence lives at home wit both parents / And Clarence parents have a real good marriage... "

    "**** off, Papa Doc, **** the clock, **** the trailer, **** everybody. **** y'all if you doubt me. I'm a piece of ****ing white trash and I say it proudly. And **** this battle, I don't wanna win, I'm outie. Here, tell these people something they don't know about me."
    Last edited by Mad Dog162; 01-10-2006 at 01:20 PM.
    Molon Labe

    Once a KA, always a KA.
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  5. #5
    Supplement Junkie CEEofGraySkull's Avatar
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    Ill shove my foot so far up in your ass, the water in my knee will quench your thirst. Rass Kass - Miami Life
    MWO - Misc. World Order

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    Cheif Justice - F2.

    Caine 607*KyGunator*nail3r*Ruffian*no_strain_no_ga


    I HAVE THE POOOOWWWWEEEEEERRRRRRR!
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  6. #6
    Don't hate cuz I'm CDN. BORN2BREED's Avatar
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    I like the classic

    "Put a quarter in your ass cause you played yourself!"
    I eat more pussy than cervical cancer.
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  7. #7
    Registered User spamking's Avatar
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    You aint a Leader..Nobody ever Followed you, Your ass was a Mistake..Yo Momma Should Have Swallowed you
    .
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    Banned karmazon's Avatar
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    "Never the king of New York, You live in Connecticut" -Jadakiss
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  9. #9
    In remission dark_man812's Avatar
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    "I'll Stick my d!ck in your ear and **** what you heard."--Rakim
    Last edited by dark_man812; 01-10-2006 at 02:42 PM.
    "Giving life support to those who overdosed on an underdose of reality."--DarkPoet

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  10. #10
    Registered User blood vs. water's Avatar
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    forgot who said it but : "you couldnt beat me to death if i let you jump first"

    juice - "i leave this mutha****a so hot it will be sizzlin i havent even started my reign im only drizzling"

    breeze evaflowin - "*****s so pussy when they spit dicks slide out"

    big L - "ask beavis i get nothin but head"

    juice - "my tape's so dope it should have came with two syringes"

    juice has plenty of sick punchlines
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  11. #11
    Registered User spamking's Avatar
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    "knocked out so many teeth, the tooth fairy went bankrupt"

    "I sell ice in the winter, i sell fire in hell, i am a hustla baby i sell water to a well"
    JayZ
    .
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  12. #12
    I'm a guy. Mrs Grudge's Avatar
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    "I drop more shells then pregnant crabs" ~ Jus Allah

    "I'm like fresh prince of bal air cuz I fill up banks" ~ 40 Cal

    "Your faker then blue eyed crackers nailed to a crucifix"~ Immortal Technique

    "Your coming up short like a million midgets masturbating"~ Ras Kass
    Access the gun's off the earth axis
    Axis of evil, the eagle will leave your hat split
    Ruck flow is like "**** you, Gawd"
    I don't wanna rhyme, I need a construction job



    - Sean Price
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  13. #13
    Super Member Nonphixion90's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mad Dog162
    Yeah I sampled your voice, you were using it wrong. You made it a hot line, I made it a hot song.

    Actually, the whole of Takeover, by Jay-Z is a great rap diss.

    This man ain't no mother-****in' MC / I know everything he's got to say against me / I am white, I am a ****ing bum / I do live in a trailer with my mom / My boy future is an Uncle Tom / I do got a dumb friend named Cheddar Bob / Who shoots himself in the leg with his own gun / I did get jumped by all six of you chumps / And Wink did **** my girl / I'm still standing here screaming "**** the Free World."

    And, "You never gonna judge me, though / 'Cause you don't know what the **** I've been through / But I know something about you / You went to Cranbrook - that's a private school / What's the matter, dog? / You're embarrassed? / This guy's a gangster? / His real name is Clarence / And Clarence lives at home wit both parents / And Clarence parents have a real good marriage... "

    "**** off, Papa Doc, **** the clock, **** the trailer, **** everybody. **** y'all if you doubt me. I'm a piece of ****ing white trash and I say it proudly. And **** this battle, I don't wanna win, I'm outie. Here, tell these people something they don't know about me."
    smh @ 8 Mile quotes, ***got


    "Mad Hoes...Ask bevis, I get nuttin butt-head"
    I'm convinced now that more then truth is at stake
    Where people create language that pretends to communicate
    Euphamisms are misundertood as mistakes
    but its a bi-product of the ghetto music we make
    From an extroverted point of view I think its to late
    Hip Hop has never been the same since '88
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  14. #14
    sharp as a razor justin00008's Avatar
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    "And as for you sucka you can keep those raps, and screw your awards my son cant eat those plaques"-Jada...


    "Block is just fine, homie, the D's straight
    Most likely your new CD is a weed plate.
    Bunch of love songs, 100% pure garbage
    Just somethin' to break up buds on"-Jada...
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  15. #15
    Possessed by SlimXtreme BrentA-AUS's Avatar
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    Even if you were a casino dealer you couldn't pull my ****ing card n****. Lord Finesse
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  16. #16
    A User that Registered ajzoot's Avatar
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    "My knife CUTCHA SKEEEEEEEEEN" - 50 cent, piggy bank
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  17. #17
    Registered User blood vs. water's Avatar
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    fifty ugh, bentley ugh - hands down sickest punchline in the entire universe
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  18. #18
    I AM NEW JERSEY gregdro's Avatar
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    "you couldnt spark a rhyme even if your ink was gasoline" - dmx

    Now let's take it back to Vibe awards
    Where that ***** disrespect and then snuffed your boss
    A minute ago, all I heard was G-G-G-G-Unit
    Fifty *****z ran and they didn't even do ****
    -fat joe

    all same song:

    Peep the style and the way the cops sweat us (uh-huh)
    The number one question is can the Feds get us (uh-huh)
    I got vendettas in dice games against ass betters (uh-huh)
    and *****z who pump wheels and drive Jettas
    Take that witcha..
    - jayz

    .. Who shot ya? Mob ties like Sinatra
    Peruvians tried to do me in, I ain't paid them yet
    Tryin to push 700's, they ain't made them yet
    -biggie

    Me and Gutter had two spots
    The two for five dollar hits, the blue tops
    Gotta go, Coolio mean it's gettin "Too Hot"
    If Fay' had twins, she'd probably have two-Pac's
    Get it? .. Tu-pac's
    -biggie (rofl)

    here is the most old school:
    still leave you on the pavement
    Condo paid for, no car payment
    At my arraignment, note for the plantiff
    Your daughter's tied up in a Brooklyn basement
    -biggie flowed it nice
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  19. #19
    I'm a guy. Mrs Grudge's Avatar
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    "I break fast like flap jacks and bacon" ~ Biggie
    Access the gun's off the earth axis
    Axis of evil, the eagle will leave your hat split
    Ruck flow is like "**** you, Gawd"
    I don't wanna rhyme, I need a construction job



    - Sean Price
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  20. #20
    Cutting Kicks Ass UliqMadiq's Avatar
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    "I'll blast if cheese at stake (steak) like the city of Philly
    It's really
    The gat talking for me, that's why I named my nine Milli Vanilli"
    - Murda Mook
    "The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
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  21. #21
    I'm a guy. Mrs Grudge's Avatar
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    "Youll get pissed on like pregnacy test" ~ Cassidy
    Access the gun's off the earth axis
    Axis of evil, the eagle will leave your hat split
    Ruck flow is like "**** you, Gawd"
    I don't wanna rhyme, I need a construction job



    - Sean Price
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  22. #22
    Cutting Kicks Ass UliqMadiq's Avatar
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    "Said she loved my necklace, started relaxin'
    Now that's what the f**k I call a chain reaction"
    - Jay-Z



    "Low as Saddam and his pawn, so unharmed, I'm unarmed,
    No I'm calm, i can yawn, sing a song,
    I'm the Don King of Dons, King Kong can bring it on,
    Word is bomb."
    - AZ



    "I never cry, if I did I'd cry ice"
    From my n*gga Sauce, I hit you with this advice
    Life's short, so play hard and stick hard
    and the only time you love 'em is when your dick hard"
    - Jay-Z



    "I got some clips that'll blow your b*tch outta her blouse
    Then blow your eyes on your lips, make you literally watch what's comin' outta your mouth"
    - Murda Mook
    Last edited by UliqMadiq; 01-10-2006 at 08:26 PM.
    "The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
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  23. #23
    Yo I'm Prison Mike Big Ad's Avatar
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    some good ones in this thread

    the most disturbing "punch line" i've ever heard is this from Biggie...

    "when i met you i admit my first thought was to trip, you look so good i'd suck on your daddy's d1ck..."
    I have been Michael's number two guy for about five years, and we make a great team. We're like one of those classic famous teams. He's like Mozart and I'm like Mozart's friend. No, I'm like Butch Cassidy and Michael is like Mozart. You try and hurt Mozart, you're gonna get a bullet in your head, courtesy of Butch Cassidy.
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  24. #24
    I'm a guy. Mrs Grudge's Avatar
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    "**** laxidents I'll beat the **** out of you!
    And if your pregnant bitch Ill beat the kid out of you!" - Celph Titled


    What ni99a **** you I get respect from the rappers you look up to/ So even when I die and your standing on my grave, im gonna still be above you!" ~ Jae Millz


    "I know b1tches who deep throat it/ Guns like the matrix 2 they reloaded" ~ Party Arty


    A tech nine is my utencil filling ni99a's up with so much led they can use their dick for a pencil ~ Big L
    Access the gun's off the earth axis
    Axis of evil, the eagle will leave your hat split
    Ruck flow is like "**** you, Gawd"
    I don't wanna rhyme, I need a construction job



    - Sean Price
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  25. #25
    I AM NEW JERSEY gregdro's Avatar
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    Jadakiss - Time's Up Lyrics (basically those whole song is 1 big ass punchline)


    Yeah, yo, I'm the ***** with the perpetual oyster bars
    Mother of pearl delivery, voice of God
    And...it's hard just being the boss
    Being I can't go to jail cause them years'll cost me
    Don't get me wrong, lay a ***** down if he force me
    Rather just sit back and roll a dutch
    Think how I'ma put the game in the cobra clutch
    Think about how I'ma get the 'caine over Customs
    Never underestimate *****z, or over trust them
    Uh...yeah them M's is right in my face
    I just gotta throw my Timbs on and tighten my lace
    If it don't jam, the Tech will spray
    When I spit everybody gotta split like pepper spray
    Cause I'm a ***** that hate to settle
    I'm a man of the Lord but I still can't shake the devil
    Moved away and still can't escape the ghetto, what

    [Chorus: Nate Dogg]
    The time to talk is up
    So bring the heat, play time is over
    While you running your mouth I'm creeping up over your shoulder
    A gun, a knife, a bat, a brick, anything I can get my hands on
    Call my bluff, start acting up, and I'll leave you underground

    [Jadakiss]
    I know how to get my pairs off me
    They can cry and die from high blood pressure cause tears are salty
    It's a symptom if you bobbin your head
    Know that he's sick, know the flow is ridic', now throw him a grip
    When I get it, you already know I'm throwin them bricks
    Puttin purple everywhere, daddy, I'm throwin them nicks
    That's right, homey, you can't move me
    I ain't goin nowhere, I'm in the hood like bootleg movies
    All you shootin is the breeze, a bootleg uzi
    I'm just waitin on a que like Suzie, don't lose me
    These penitentiary chances that I take
    Should be able to get the mansion by the lake
    But I invest my bread into something else
    Into something else that'll make something melt
    You just gotta feel the kid
    if not rap for the fact of how real he is, what up

    [Chorus]

    [Jadakiss]
    Aiyo, *****z know the champ is in here
    He took it from crack to rap, now he put out two anthems a year
    And I just wanna rock for a century
    And then chase the book with the documentary
    If you, can't do nothin other than flow
    Life's a bitch like the mother from +Blow+, let's go
    Don't make me put your heart in your lap
    **** ridin the beat, *****, I parallel park on the track
    Hop out lookin crispy, fresh and new
    In the six, but it's a BM, and it's Pepsi blue
    And, I don't know you.
    But I know a man becomes a man from all the **** that he go through
    Ya'll ain't ****in with Jason
    After I cash in, it's really no justification
    Of how I'm gonna change the game, so don't get outta line
    Cause this little nine will change your frame, what up
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  26. #26
    Mata Leao Famosa's Avatar
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    Just a few from Chino XL :

    'Without HIV I'm positive you don't wanna test...I leave rappers confused like homeless cats on house arrest.'- Chino XL

    'Clear the runways, cause I'ma make you rappers my examples
    Avoiding battling me like I'm Eazy-E's blood samples ' - Chino XL


    'You get KILT like them plad skirts scottish men be wearin' - Chino XL

    'How the broke crooks in videos leave me stressed
    I'll turn on channel 2 if I wanna CBS, bitch (See BS)' - Chino XL


    'Think of me as a caveman, I invented Fire' - Chino XL

    'I'm rarely seen, loch ness and bigfoot take pictures of me' - Chino XL

    'A samauri how i shoegun (show gun)' - Chino XL

    'Chino dissed me, rappers whine/To disrespect you I would have had to had respected you at some time/ I never did and don't care so come up for air put your money where your mouth is make my crotch a millionaire' - Chino XL

    'These Homos been in the closet so long i'ma donate them to the Salvation Army' - Chino XL

    'I died a thousand deaths to posses skills such as this'
    'With delivery like where arabs live in-tents(Intense)' - Chino XL
    Last edited by Famosa; 01-10-2006 at 10:19 PM.
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  27. #27
    Who Is Phone? WIP's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Famosa
    Just a few from Chino XL :

    'Without HIV I'm positive you don't wanna test...I leave rappers confused like homeless cats on house arrest.'- Chino XL

    'Clear the runways, cause I'ma make you rappers my examples
    Avoiding battling me like I'm Eazy-E's blood samples ' - Chino XL


    'You get KILT like them plad skirts scottish men be wearin' - Chino XL

    'How the broke crooks in videos leave me stressed
    I'll turn on channel 2 if I wanna CBS, bitch (See BS)' - Chino XL


    'Think of me as a caveman, I invented Fire' - Chino XL

    'I'm rarely seen, loch ness and bigfoot take pictures of me' - Chino XL

    'A samauri how i shoegun (show gun)' - Chino XL

    'Chino dissed me, rappers whine/To disrespect you I would have had to had respected you at some time/ I never did and don't care so come up for air put your money where your mouth is make my crotch a millionaire' - Chino XL

    'These Homos been in the closet so long i'ma donate them to the Salvation Army' - Chino XL

    'I died a thousand deaths to posses skills such as this'
    'With delivery like where arabs live in-tents(Intense)' - Chino XL
    damn.......
    Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it. - Lou Holtz

    If a man wants something he has never had before, he must do something he's never done before.
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  28. #28
    In remission dark_man812's Avatar
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    "I carry more tricks up my sleeve than a three dollar hooker on 2 for 1 night."-DarkPoet

    You've heated me and you're better off repeatedly letting King Kong sodomize you while wearing a cactus condom lubricated with sandpaper."--DarkPoet

    "Bust all over your couch now you've got Seimens furniture."--Phife Dawg
    "Giving life support to those who overdosed on an underdose of reality."--DarkPoet

    First Order Log and Workout Program:
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  29. #29
    Cutting Kicks Ass UliqMadiq's Avatar
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    "You couldn't spit if you were a virgin b***h who hates swallowing
    Leave you wit fat lips like chicks getting collagen"
    - Apathy
    "The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
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  30. #30
    Cutting Kicks Ass UliqMadiq's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    Originally Posted by Famosa
    Just a few from Chino XL :

    'Without HIV I'm positive you don't wanna test...I leave rappers confused like homeless cats on house arrest.'- Chino XL

    'Clear the runways, cause I'ma make you rappers my examples
    Avoiding battling me like I'm Eazy-E's blood samples ' - Chino XL


    'You get KILT like them plad skirts scottish men be wearin' - Chino XL

    'How the broke crooks in videos leave me stressed
    I'll turn on channel 2 if I wanna CBS, bitch (See BS)' - Chino XL


    'Think of me as a caveman, I invented Fire' - Chino XL

    'I'm rarely seen, loch ness and bigfoot take pictures of me' - Chino XL

    'A samauri how i shoegun (show gun)' - Chino XL

    'Chino dissed me, rappers whine/To disrespect you I would have had to had respected you at some time/ I never did and don't care so come up for air put your money where your mouth is make my crotch a millionaire' - Chino XL

    'These Homos been in the closet so long i'ma donate them to the Salvation Army' - Chino XL

    'I died a thousand deaths to posses skills such as this'
    'With delivery like where arabs live in-tents(Intense)' - Chino XL
    Chino spits quality
    "The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it, as long as you really believe 100 percent." - Arnold Schwarzenegger
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