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  1. #4831
    🥋 A Karate Kid age 60 Samraiwise's Avatar
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    POOH : "The next day, she sent me a text and apologized to me."



    POOH : "GROWL~!!"
    💉St. Jude/FedEx Invitational Donation Thread (Misc. Sticky): To Help Children with Cancers
    https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=178526741
    ⭐ Samurai Break: 140kg(308lb) Failed Bench Press Recovery Video:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8eIkpZ29u0
    ⭐ Over 35 Training Journal:
    https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=4832373
    📌 Please Call me Kaz, a 60-year-old 🥋 Karate Kid in Tokyo.
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  2. #4832
    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    NEWS IN PHOTOS


    Indomitable Honey Bee Stings Itself
    Rather Than Fall To Asian Hornet


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  3. #4833
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

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  4. #4834
    Getting Toned steffo99's Avatar
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    My elderly parents got a good laugh from watching a carpentry video from New Zeeland about decking. The swedish subtitles on youtube kept using the most vulgar translation it could find throughout the video. Which (somehow) led me to find this one.

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  5. #4835
    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    LOL! Very funny, Steffo!
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  6. #4836
    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    - THE FRIDAY CHUCKLER -




    'Mortal Kombat' Introduces Brutal New
    Fatality Where Your Character Just
    States An Opposing Viewpoint




    U.S.—In a surprise update to Mortal Kombat 11 released to players on Monday,
    NetherRealm and Warner Bros. Interactive have introduced a brutal new fatality where
    your character just states an opposing viewpoint, and the opponent dies instantly.


    Every character can reportedly access this new alternative fatality.

    One character says, "There are only two genders," and his opponent instantly melts into
    nothing, being unable to handle the opposing viewpoint. Another character suggests that
    capitalism isn't all bad, and his opponent's head instantly falls off. Other Mortal
    Kombat
    fighters make statements about how it's OK to be white, or how you can be friends
    with people with opposing political ideas.

    Every single time the statement is made, the opponent instantly dies from the sudden and
    unexpected shattering of their echo chamber.

    According to insiders, Ben Shapiro is expected to be introduced as downloadable content
    soon, and he will "literally make his opponents explode in blood and guts with facts and
    logic."






    Social Distancing Doesn't Apply To Us,
    Joggers Confirm




    ST. LOUIS—MAINTAINING a distance of 6.5 feet from other people applies to
    everyone except joggers, joggers have agreed.


    People who run right in the middle of sidewalks are allowing themselves to pass right by pedestrians
    rather than run the very real risk of momentarily losing pace.

    Julian Cook said: “I’m exercising, so I’ve got priority. Now more than ever.

    “If you and your family or dog or whatever don’t look around to see a runner coming and
    immediately jump out of the way, as you would with an oncoming train, that’s your lookout.

    “I know I could just ask you to move, but passing you in a wheezing, spluttering cloud of possible
    COVID-19 will give your trip out that frisson of excitement you’re probably missing.


    “We’re doing you a favor, if anything. If you get the virus because joggers have flouted government
    advice, you’re going to make a valuable contribution to herd immunity.

    “And if not, your sacrifice was to maintain my fitness levels and possibly set a new personal best. So
    it won’t be in vain.”






    Trump Retaliates Against Asian Murder
    Hornets With American Kamikaze Bears




    WASHINGTON, D.C.—President Trump has retaliated against the release of Asian murder
    hornets with newly developed kamikaze bears.


    Trump deployed the bears all across Asia Tuesday morning, laughing maniacally as the
    aggressive predators who will definitely kill you charged into China exploding themselves
    wherever they could.

    The bears are flung from aircraft carriers and fly into their targets, frightening people
    because they're friggin' bears and then exploding everybody to death. They have been
    trained to roar, "AMERICA, SON!" as they approach their target, striking even more fear
    into the hearts of their foes.

    "What's better than hornets? Bears. Kamikaze bears. The best bears, maybe ever," Trump
    said as he unveiled six of the kamikaze bears, the deadliest biological weapon in American
    history. "Who's a good bear? You are. That's right. Bears! The best! Everyone says so!"

    Members of the press slowly backed away from the large, aggressive predators, but it was
    too late. "Why don't we try this out on the media?" Trump said. "Bears, attack!"
    Last edited by Lou1se; 05-08-2020 at 03:28 AM.
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  7. #4837
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Ha Ha Kaz, that bear cracked me up



    Originally Posted by steffo99 View Post
    My elderly parents got a good laugh from watching a carpentry video from New Zeeland about decking. The swedish subtitles on youtube kept using the most vulgar translation it could find throughout the video. Which (somehow) led me to find this one.











    Hilarious Steffo....

    Great stuff Lou1se keep em coming.
    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

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  8. #4838
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

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  9. #4839
    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    I went to a pet shop and asked for
    twelve bees. The shopkeeper counted
    out thirteen and handed them over.

    "You've given me one too many."

    "That one is a freebie."



    ~;~






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  10. #4840
    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    NEWS IN PHOTOS


    Dog’s Eye Gunk Wiped Back On Dog

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    ~~MsFit~~ Lou1se's Avatar
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    - THE FRIDAY CHUCKLER -




    Democratic States Deploy Greta
    Thunberg Drones To Lecture People
    Who Go Outside




    U.S.—Several Democrat-controlled states have released new Greta Thunberg surveillance
    drones into the wild to lecture people who go outside.


    The drones include a camera to catch people going outside and a screen playing a Greta
    Thunberg lecture. They fly along beaches and hover over parks, shouting and chasing off
    people who try to have a little fun or live without fear.

    "How dare you! You are robbing me of my dreams and my childhood!" one drone shouted
    at a couple hanging out on a California beach, though they were hundreds of feet away
    from anyone else. "You have stolen everything from me! EVERYTHING!"

    Some models of the drones are also equipped with tasers that shock people and chase
    them back into their homes while Greta warns about global warming, coronavirus fears,
    and the need to submit to the coming one-world government. "I am an expert! Fear me!
    Listen to me about everything!"

    The number of drones being shot out of the sky has gone way up in most of these states,
    except in California where you can't buy a gun.







    Study Finds Mediterranean Diet Adds
    Years To Your Life, But Only By Taking
    Them Away From Others




    SOUTH KINGSTOWN, RI—Researchers at the University of Rhode Island
    published a study Friday revealing that the Mediterranean diet can, in fact, add
    years to one’s life, but only by taking them away from others.


    “Our study confirms that a diet rich in foods such as olive oil, fish, and green vegetables
    can extend one’s lifespan by several years, as long as a life-expectancy equilibrium is
    maintained through reducing another person’s life by an equal amount of time,” said
    head researcher Mara Haugen, hypothesizing that the phenomenon could possibly
    be attributed to the complex but lesser-known vampiric properties of omega-3
    fatty acids.

    “We’ve found that people who adhere to the Mediterranean diet tend to feel more
    energized during the day and sleep more peacefully at night, feeding as they do off
    the waning life force of another human being, who withers and becomes sickly in turn.

    “This is a huge breakthrough in the field of nutrition, and we highly recommend people
    adopt the lifestyle before they fall victim to it.”

    Haugen went on to speculate that, if a person was fully committed to the Mediterranean
    diet, it may be possible for them to draw enough life force from the Earth’s population
    to achieve immortality.







    CNN Replaces President Trump's Press
    Briefings With President Xi's




    ATLANTA, GA—CNN is refusing to air President Trump's press briefings, calling them
    propaganda and fake news. Instead, the station will be broadcasting the far more fair,
    balanced, and accurate daily takes by President Xi Jinping.


    "We don't want to broadcast Trump's propaganda, so we'll turn to a far more accurate
    source," said Brian Stelter. "We pretty much were already repeating the Chinese
    government's stances word for word, so now we can go straight to the horse's mouth."

    Financial costs were also a factor here, according to insiders. Legacy media has been hit
    hard by the economic shutdown. CNN has had to look for ways to cut corners and save
    time, and they found out they could save tons of man-hours by just broadcasting President
    Xi Jinping's press briefings directly.

    Now, instead of rewriting Chinese press briefings for an American audience, CNN can just
    air the communist country's propaganda directly, getting hours' worth of free content to
    broadcast to empty airports and hotel lobbies.

    "We were spending all this time and effort translating his broadcasts and rewriting them,
    and we figured this was a lot more efficient," said a CNN spokesperson. "Work smarter, not
    harder."
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

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    mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000)
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
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  21. #4851
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  22. #4852
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  23. #4853
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  24. #4854
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  25. #4855
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  26. #4856
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  27. #4857
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  28. #4858
    temporary illusion supramax's Avatar
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    It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.

    It's easy to not be afraid of tigers when you're sitting in your living room watching a television program about tigers. When you're in the jungle where the tigers are, it's quite a different story.
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  29. #4859
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

  30. #4860
    In Witness Protection mtpockets's Avatar
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    mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000) mtpockets has a reputation beyond repute. Second best rank possible! (+100000)
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    Air Force Veteran 1976 - 1999

    Real Heroes don't wear capes.

    Keep your squats low and standards high.

    You are not stuck at home, you are safe at home.
    Reply With Quote

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