couples & workout partners

[Seosaid]

I originally posted this in the general forum, although I think that men and women will have a very different view, so I am asking you girls your point of view…

I'd like to know what you think about couples who work out together...

Does it help your workout?
How has it affected your lifestyle?

Has working out together created strong connections within the couple?
Or has is been the opposite?

Is your partner a motivation, or annoyed by your dedication to the gym?

Do you think all couples are meant to be workout partners?
Context : I'm writing an article on couples who work out together, I'd like to know how good or the bad your experiences have been living with someone and working out together.... I'd like to see both sides of the spectrum. Do you think it helps you stay on track... have you felt more focused or the opposite ?

For example, I, myself, found that I am a lot more motivated to stay on track even outside the gym, since we both watch what we eat, I think our relationship is stronger since my boyfriend and I have the same goals, we’re both so into bbing, I can feed off his enthusiasm. Witnessing his strength, self-discipline and physical prowess has boosted my admiration for him. Exercise is such a major part of my life, I couldn’t be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t understand it.

How is it for you?
Josie

[jpeg]

Hi Josie!

I am lucky enough to have 2 workout partners (hi runninggirl ). I first started working out by myself and that didn't work out so well. After my gym membership was up my husband & I joined a gym together and it has definitely helped. He loves cardio, which I hate and I love lifting, which he hates. He has really helped with my pace (we started running this summer) and it's really awesome having someone to push you. Sometimes I do get annoyed with him liftingwise though b/c he really takes it easy (taking too much rest, not lifting heavy enough) but it's all good in the end. B/C after all, when it comes to fitness all you get out of it is what you put in - even if someone is holding your hand the whole way. If you want more info, PM me. Our relationship has definitely changed for the better since we became fitness-oriented..

My other workout partner is also awesome b/c she has taught me a ton and is an aweome inspiration. She started out at the same point as me and will be doing a figure competition in a few weeks! I can't stress enough how helpful it is to have partners b/c in this realm there are a lot of people who just don't get it. A lot of friends and family kind of frown upon not being able to go out to eat or getting up at 5 to go for a run so having ppl in your life who do get it is just incredible!

[nsouth]

I met my boyfriend doing pull-ups in the gym. We hit it off specifically because of our love for working out and the discipline the lifestyle requires. I still love working out with him as he knows when I'm not working to failure and he pushes me to get there. It's interesting to have the one you love pay this kind of attention to your body. It's a truly sincere compliment when you've been training hard together and they compliment your progress. But when you work out together and you're fighting - there's no greater sabotage!

[kaylers]

Hi,

I think that you have a very interesting topic posted. As a young woman who has been searching for a workout partner male or female I think that it would be very useful. However, it has been my experience that I have not met any other women my age who want to weightlift. This is probably due to a lot of misconceptions about weightlifting etc. Having said that my boyfriend and I go to separate gyms. We keep eachother motivated by going to fitness shows together, trying new protein powders. I am currently in training and although he is not at the same gym he keeps me motivated in other positive ways.
I also think that it would be positive if more people lifted together. I personally enjoy working out alone. However, I find the weight room to be a competitive atmosphere. I think that having a partner would assist in the intimidation that many women feel, thus making them reluctant to even try weight lifting. I do not want to make a firm statement on how women feel, however this has just been my experience.
Saying that if anyone in Toronto is interested in a training partner please let me know.

cheers,
Kaylers

[intrain_n]

nsouth,
I couldn't agree more with everything you've stated!!

I hired a trainer over 1.5 years ago, and we stared dating shortly after, we began training together not long after that. Not only does he know all there is to know about training and dieting, which keeps our workouts from plateauing and keeps them interesting, but he also knows me very well and he knows what I'm capable of and motivates me to push to myself to my limit. He's a great workout partner and a wonderful boyfriend!!

[Islanka]

I use to go out with this dude who would get annoyed when I wanted to go to the gym.

Also he didn't consider it to be "natural" to eat only specific food. He kept complaining, and even forcing me to eat more! What a moron!!!

He would made me feel so guilty for spending time on my own that, before I could realize it, I was going less and less often. (what a moron I've been!)

The worst part, he dumped me!

Ever since that time, I've been looking for a good and motivating partner in and out the gym.,.. no such luck yet!

I am scared as hell to end up with someone who doesn't have the same motivation as me.

Any men interested in sharing gym time and bed?

[intrain_n]

Islanka, you're a riot!!
Yes you're ex sounds like a moron and it sounds like he was intimated by you!! Silly boy!! He should have learned from you and joined in on your fun!! Too bad for him. If being fit and training hard is as important as it sounds to you, you're definitely going to need to find someone as into it as you!! The rest of the world looks at us folk, as not normal!! What's wrong with eating a slab of meat like a candy bar?? YUM!!

Finding someone who understands or appreciates it as much as you do is extremely important!! I'm glad I found my training partner!! he's cute!! It's fun to look at his butt while he trains!!

Good luck!!!

[RUBICON19]

Thanks Sweepea (A.K.A. intrain'n) Yes she is my training partner and girlfriend. She started as my client and one thing led to another and here we are 1.5 years later still going strong. intrain'n is one of the best training partners I have ever had. She is dedicated and determined. She trains with a passion. She trains just as hard if not harder than most of my past guy training partners. It makes it alot easier when your other half lives the same lifestyle you do. We understand each other. Most guys in the iron game are not as lucky as I am to have such a beautiful, wonderful, understanding training partner and best friend. Thanks for being you and keep up the great work. You are the best!!!

[Seosaid]

Guy!! thank you all so much for your answers!

I'm well into my article, even if it's for the French canadian Market I might translate and submit it to BB.com, In any event, I'll let you know how it turns out.

I had the idea for this specific article because my fiancé and I first became attracted to each other because of the dedication we each put in the gym.

I would say this is one of the pillar in our relationship, but also our relationship is one of the pillar of our work out!

I'll probably ask other questions, since I have to turn in one article each month and I'm running out of ideas. (if you have any, feel free to let me know!!)

Once again thanks!

[intrain_n]

Not only is he as wonderful as he sounds. He's also a super strong, georgous loving, caring man that will blow your mind with his vast amount of knowledge on training and dieting as well as many other things. He's been the key to my success and many others. You tell him your goals and he'll get you there!! (even if you're kicking and screaming the whole time!!)

[marellan]

When I first met my boyfriend, one of the many things we found in common was the love of working out. Though we both had different goals (he wants to gain mass, I want to lose a few pounds), we motivate each other to work towards our goals. I get excited for him when he gain some more muscle mass, he congratulates me when I lose another pound.

One of the biggest benefits is that we are still somewhat beginners and we get to learn together. We combine what we read on this forum and site and inform each other of new ideas. I can think of numerous benefits from working out with a significant other: having him/her understand when you turn down a piece of cake, feeling like you have a connection in a lifestyle that isn't common in other college students, and even something as simple as always having a spotter.

[Blaney4]

This topic couldn't come at a better time. The hubby just started coming to the gym with me, which is great because I now have a spotter. So I started him out doing my routine on a 3 day split. He needs to lose weight and gain some muscle. We are on our second week of chest and tris and I am on my third set 7th rep of the bench press and struggling a bit to get the next rep out(Soooo happy to have a spotter) and as I am pushing the weight up he says "I don't see any other woman doing these. Maybe you should do something else in the other room to stay toned" URGGGGGGGGGGGGH! In the middle of this rep I managed to spit out "How do you think I got toned you moron, lifting 3 lb dumbells?" Ok so I calmed down, really love the man and when I was done with him I think he had it straight in his head One of these days I am going to teach him how to turn the vacuum on also But he is right about the woman in my gym - I have only seen one other woman doing bench presses in the 6 months I have been going.

[kaylers]

Hey Islanka,

I just read your message and felt an immediate desire to write back to you. Your ex boyfriend sounds like he not only is he limiting himself to new doors to open up, but also limiting himself as a person not to expose himself to new things.
The best thing about weightlifting/bodybuilding is that its both a mental and physical process. It helps you not only reevaluate your pirorites but also how you manage your day. I think that when anyone critizes the idea of anyone improving their lifestyle by fitness and proper eating is in need of some wisdom.
It sounds like you have a lot of desire to get into fitness to improve the quality of your lifestyle. I'm glad that you are choosing to surround yourself with people who seek to motivate you. Remember you define your lifestyle, you ideals and what you value. Stick to it and someone on that path will find you.

Goodluck

[darkangel]

I've never really had a significant other as training partner, although I think I'd love it. My ex used to spot me when I was lifting weights at home, but would never workout with me. He didn't try to discourage me, but neither did he ever really make any positive comments about my progress. (And then he'd get jealous when I'd post progress pics online and get compliments and encouragement from other guys... go figure...)

However, I've just stumbled across a guy on the Yahoo Personals who's a member at my gym. I'm hoping maybe he'll be interested in working out together some. He teaches a kickboxing class, so I'm not sure if he'll want to weight train with me or not.

[JLB001]

My other half shares the same love of the gym. We both hate cardio and dieting, so when I decided to do a show, he diets and does cardio right along with me. We both competeted in a natty show in June, but there was no couples division, so we did individuals.

I must say Craig keeps me focused and grounded, plus puts of with me being moody when I go low carb and have to do buttloads of sprints and cardio. He also spots me so I continue to lift heavier. All of this while finishing up Chiro. school and working a part time job.

The pic is from the show we did together (he used dreamtan and didn't get it blended well on his face.)

[Anima]

Man. I would just kill for someone to work out with, I am so envious of you lot that have partners that motivate you..... Islanka, ever thought of advertising for a lifting partner? Perhaps you can find someone that way... I know it may sound wierd, but somewhere in your area there may be someone wanting the same thing. I dont mean a BF, but someone you can share your drive with, at least. Someone to keep the motivation up with (guilt is a wonderful motivator LOL if I had to show up cause someone else was coming I'd virtually never fail to arrive out of sheer guilt)

[Blue40]

Hi there!
I work out with my boyfriend as well. I use to be a workout at home video freak. LOL I met my boyfriend and a few months later we moved in together and he got me a gym membership. I instantly loved it and we workout together. We help keep each other motivated and he's taught me a lot of great things so if I do go to the gym alone I can workout on my own. Which is vary rare we workout usually together. We both have friends that think it wierd we work out together and some of our friends think were crazy for going to the gym. Go figure! We like staying in shape and being fit apparently they don't. But having my boyfriend as my trainer basically has been great he's been lifting since he was 15 so he's taught me a lot.
Blue

[child0fate]

My bf and I have been going to the gym together for years, but have just recently started working out together. Since then I've seen amazing changes in my body. We push each other harder because I like to see his discomfort when I can match him in weight, and he just likes to show off!

We also have a closer relationship because we have such an understanding for each other. We know each other's limits, both physically and mentally, and we know exactly how to push them to get our best results.

Also since we eat on the same schedule and restrict our diets to the same types of food, it makes it so much easier to stay on track.

[MariahUCF]

My husband and I met 5 years ago and have been weight training together ever since. Well, sort of together. We ride to and from the gym together and we spot each other occasionally but most of the time we do separate workouts because we like to do different exercises and splits. Working out together has definitely strengthened our bond because we share the same passion. We give each other advice about our routines and supplements. Neither of us minds that 95% of our Saturday night "dates" are spent at the gym. I can't imagine having a partner that was not interested in working out and nutrition. I definitely don't think I would be as consistent as I am now without my husband there to motivate me. Plus, he looks really good so it makes me want to look just as good so no one thinks "What's that hot guy doing with her?"

[Seosaid]

Thanks for the anwers


JLB001 what a great couple! Good luck in your shows.

RUBICON19, more women should have the luck to have someone like you, you truly are a positive asset in your woman's life as well as in her training!

Poor Islanka, but you know what they say... plenty of fish at the gym

My boyfriend and I share this passion. When we started seeing each other, he was turned on by my motivation.. while I was attracted by his bber body
If it wasn't for the gym, I'm not even sure we would have noticed each other in the first place.

Gym and a proper nutrition, for us, really is a way of life...
My boyfriend has a naturaly good body, he's been in maitenance mode for the last 10 years, while I have to work twice as hard just to avoid gaining fat, Although now that he turned 35, he decided to kick it up a notch.

We are now even more into our workout lifestyle then ever.
I am so proud to see him hit the gym in the morning with me!

I just love it! if he wasn't there I would sometime sleep in instead of going to the gym and would indulge in a large bowl of pasta instead of tuna!

[Natbornthrilla]

I wish my wife would work out with me more often. I get her in the gym maybe 1 time every 2 weeks. She has a bigger family and has learned there habits. She hates to sweat and she thinks about food a lot. It is really hard to live a bodybuilding lifestyle when you are screaming chicken breast and they are screaming pizza

[AUTIGR]

My wife won't work out with me. Not that I really want her to anyway. She gets all pissed when I try to show her the proper way to do things. It's o.k. though, she doesn't do the kind of training I do anyway.

[egoatdoor]

I use to go out with this dude who would get annoyed when I wanted to go to the gym.

Also he didn't consider it to be "natural" to eat only specific food. He kept complaining, and even forcing me to eat more! What a moron!!!

He would made me feel so guilty for spending time on my own that, before I could realize it, I was going less and less often. (what a moron I've been!)

The worst part, he dumped me!

Ever since that time, I've been looking for a good and motivating partner in and out the gym.,.. no such luck yet!

I am scared as hell to end up with someone who doesn't have the same motivation as me.

Any men interested in sharing gym time and bed?

I, If I could hop a plane to Iceland, I'd go tomorrow.

I would love to train and share life with a "significant other" who shares my love of training, the lifestyle and believes in "go hard or go home". I've trained in several gyms in recent years and don't really use them as a social tool, but with two exceptions ( one of whom was already married), all of the women in these places ( one of which was an alleged "hard core" gym) suffer from those misconceptions about weights and women and have no interest in really applying themselves to building real (and attractive) lean muscle. Most in fact are intimidated by serious trainers, male or female and are quick to bolt back to the "safe" machine and cardio areas.

[Tattoogirl4]

My boyfriend and I are both gym addicts. We have two seperate gyms, yet we do go to each others gym if our schedules allow. We both like our gyms. I go to a Gold's that is nice and clean. My boyfriend goes to what he calls a "man's gym" it's smelly, dirty, and old school. We both go 5-7 days a week and are just fine with each other putting the gym before a movie or shopping, or goofing off. We both appriaciate that about each other. It's nice not to be pressured to miss the gym because our other half doesn't want us to work out that day. Ya know

[DeezGst]

and he just likes to show off!

Not true!

[jul]

I've been training with my husband for many yrs.We are compatible in the gym because we share the same goals.I do all the same exercises as I don't feel there is a difference between his muscles and mine.I hear women say they have to do different exercises than men.I don't get this theory.Glutes,adductor/abductors?Squats cover all those bases.Women are afraid of "bulking up".If a women is concerned with getting bulky, chances are she's not taking in enough calories to support muscle let alone gain it.My husband and I have fun in the gym.Except on leg day.(I get a workout just helping him load/unload the leg press) The only negative I find is when he feels he needs an extra day off and I'm ready to go the gym.I could always go without him but then it throws our routine off.

[Islanka]

Islanka, ever thought of advertising for a lifting partner? Perhaps you can find someone that way... I know it may sound wierd, but somewhere in your area there may be someone wanting the same thing. )

I thought about it, the only problem is that here in Iceland not a lot of people work out, it may sound weird but it's not a big part of the culture. (well at least not as much as rinking vodka! )

I 3 years ago I lived in Canada for a while, that's when a good friend (THANKS JO!) introduced me to the benefits of working out.

I would train with her anytime, but she already has people lining up to workout with her... (this is true, ask seosaid about this, you'll laugh)

I also have gotten to the point where I'm more than serious.. I dont want gym talk..I want to push hard! I still havent found anyone like this here yet.

I'm thinking about going back to Canada next month or so, so we'll see once I get there.

[noho]

when you have a workout partner, what do you think is the most effective way to train together. I haven't really had a serious workout buddy, and was wondering how you structure your workouts. Do you just call them over when you need a spot or extra push? Or, do you do each exercise together, pushing them each set? Something inbetween?

[sierralulu]

My husband and I have been getting up at 4:00 a.m. for the past 4 years and workout together. We train one body part a day and we push eachother as hard if not harder than a PT would. I am currently training for my first figure competition and he is very supportive. We have two kids (11,13) So our time in the mornings belong to us. It's been a great type of Therapy.

[Seosaid]

We have two kids (11,13) So our time in the mornings belong to us. It's been a great type of Therapy.

sierralulu (and others)...

My fiancé and I are planning to start a familly soon... I know this is going to sound weird, but I'm scared not have time to go to the gym as much as I do now.

Maybe I'm just scared to become a mum :P
I dont want to be the "used to be fit" woman who doesn't take time for herself afterwards.

At the same time women around me who complain about never having time when you have kids are the ones who were only dedicated to their husband before and didnt do anything else anyway, sometime not even work.

Am I crazy to think this? How is it for you?
Does your life really change that much?