Yo Gbullock32 could you tell us some crazy prison stories? Srs

[Barteh]

Just for you I can type a few from time to time; not always able to use my mic. I'll type at least one a day or so.

What a legend. I'll make and exception and listen to some of the vocaroos when I have the time. They ought to be good.

[stegosaurus]

OK Chief. Wanna tell me how many years you did and how many family members who are career criminals and how many millions of dollars you touched with your own hands? No? then mind your bussiness

Heres a fuking scenario for you Your driving come from work going home.You take sip of coffee and you hit a homeless bum in the middle of the street cause the fuk was high?. Next thing you know your getting arrested for vehiclure manslaughter. WTF do you do? Thats right you dont know what to do and your mom or sister could get charged on a chitty day at any time.chit happens

yes, we get it, you're mad

on with the thread

[gbullock32]

Working A Yard, it's just after 0500 and my partners and I are escorting 5 inmates from A Yard to R&R (receive and release), some are paroling, some transferring, and we take them back there right before the end of our shift; to make this go faster we grabbed a long golf cart that will fit 8 people, and it has a metal wheelchair ramp on the side that folds up. Even folded though it does still stick out 8 inches or so from the side of the cart, this is important to factor in when driving through tight spaces. So we load the inmates on the cart and this new guy is driving the cart, I am opening the gates; I open the vehicle gate, but only open one side since it's easier than opening the full gate; the guy driving the golf cart just slams the gas and goes through, but the wheelchair ramp slams right into the center post of the gate. A normal person would stop at this point, not this guy, he just keeps flooring the gas and drags the wheelchair ramp right through the gate and bends the fck out of the center gate post. The inmates are laughing and I'm like "Bro, wtf is wrong with you, why the hell didn't you stop." All he says is "I dunno", well dammit this guy is fcking dumb. I look at the gate and the post is so bent we can barely close the gate, and there is no way in hell that the side that got bent is opening, fck it, we'll deal with that later.

We go and drop the inmates off and head back to the gate, this time I am driving because I ain't trusting this idiot to not run into more sht. When we get back to the gate I can tell we can't just leave it, it's so obvious it's bent and I don't want to write that memo as to how it happened, so I just hit the gas on the cart and slam the gate from the other side, it's already broken so fck it, worst case is I break it more. Luckily this worked and the golf cart slamming it bent the post back to mostly straight, good enough we could open and close the gate fine anyways. Got back to the yard and just didn't bother mentioning anything, it got fixed (kind of) so no problems!

[gbullock32]

Working A Yard, it's just after 0400 and we are escorting the dining workers to the dining hall, we have a non-regular Sgt. who likes to micromanage, but she has no idea WTF she is doing, thinks she knows policy but is oblivious. So I come out of building 3 with 2 inmates and I see the Sgt. standing in front of building 4 screaming at this big motherfcking AMI (American Indian) guy.... fck, I really don't feel like getting my ass kicked right now, and this is a big mofo. I walk up like "Hey, uh, what's going on?" and it turns out the Sgt is screaming at this guy for wearing a bandana, saying he can't have it on, it's not allowed. He says it's a religious bandana, and he can wear it. Now, the inmate is right, per policy an inmate can wear any headwear they consider religious as long as it is listed in the Inmate Property Matrix for Religious Items. This policy says any bandana, 24"x24" as long as it is grey or white can be worn as a religious item. I know this, but dammit I can't say it in front of the inmate, my Sgt might be a fcking idiot and wrong, but they're still my partner and I need to back them up.

So I am cool with this AMI dude and just tell him don't worry about it, we'll sort it later and to just head to work, and the whole walk my Sgt is going off on this guy, luckily he's chill and doesn't do anything. We get to the dining hall and let the workers in, and right as we close the door my Sgt looks at me and says "I'm right, aren't I?" I Bert Stare at her and said "No, no you are completely wrong but I couldn't just say that and front you off" and I then had to go and pull up the policy on religious items just to get her to believe me that she was wrong.

I hate supervisors who have no idea what they are doing.

[gbullock32]

yes, we get it, you're mad

on with the thread

I think we worked it out, two sides, same coin, we can move on.

[gwg77]

Mostly it's free staff (cooks, teachers, counselors, ect) that bring sht in, occasionally COs but it's less common. Also, $800? Damn, currently $2k for a cheapo burner phone right now, though I have seen some of the newest Samsungs, IPhones, and Google phones, those can get up to $5-7k. Though CA gave all inmates tablets with video/picture/text message capabilities so prices coming down. Even looking at just giving inmates cell phones, because, you know, CA.

So that got tablets and wifi for prisoners now? Wow.


Great thread bro!

[Akd123]

So that got tablets and wifi for prisoners now? Wow.


Great thread bro!

Yeah but they are locked and most places you have to pay for them.If you take them home you even have to pay the company to unlock them to do the stuff normal tablets do. Its alot better than nothing though

[gbullock32]

Yeah but they are locked and most places you have to pay for them.If you take them home you even have to pay the company to unlock them to do the stuff normal tablets do. Its alot better than nothing though

No pay in CA, it's all free, because CA of course... No taking them home though, they are State property, but if you break it, no questions asked, you get a new one.

[gbullock32]

On the tablets too, so we have a station in the dayroom of the buildings, you put the tablet on it (a wall mounted dock basically) and it has a magnet that lets inmates do video calls to family; no magnet and the video call wont work. Apparently any magnet works though, so inmates figured this out, and well, that's a 'security' issue. Given it's CA though, they just ignore it, sure they can take video of the entire building, us doing security checks, any possible security issues (doors, windows, whatever) and instead of fixing this, it's just ignored. CA! They got tablets since the assumption was it would lead to less violence, it didn't.

Used to be if we had a staff assault we would go into lockdown for weeks/months. Now... normal program, it was an 'isolated incident', we had 2 staff assaults in an hour, and nothing, normal program. Fck us right?

[lightsarefallin]

Some wild stories, boyo. Thanks for sharing. Will read through them periodically.

[Akd123]

On the tablets too, so we have a station in the dayroom of the buildings, you put the tablet on it (a wall mounted dock basically) and it has a magnet that lets inmates do video calls to family; no magnet and the video call wont work. Apparently any magnet works though, so inmates figured this out, and well, that's a 'security' issue. Given it's CA though, they just ignore it, sure they can take video of the entire building, us doing security checks, any possible security issues (doors, windows, whatever) and instead of fixing this, it's just ignored. CA! They got tablets since the assumption was it would lead to less violence, it didn't.

Used to be if we had a staff assault we would go into lockdown for weeks/months. Now... normal program, it was an 'isolated incident', we had 2 staff assaults in an hour, and nothing, normal program. Fck us right?

Thats because CA has one of the highest amounts if not the highest amount of violent criminals locked up in the country. Im sure as chit glad ive never done time there. In most places Tablets would decrease crime but CA is fuked. You gotta pay for them here in some places i think. You guys have those JPay or JP5 Tablets?

[gbullock32]

Thats because CA has one of the highest amounts if not the highest amount of violent criminals locked up in the country. Im sure as chit glad ive never done time there. In most places Tablets would decrease crime but CA is fuked. You gotta pay for them here in some places i think. You guys have those JPay or JP5 Tablets?

Jpay, srs though, it's like fck me how crazy sht gets.

Sitting on the bench on the yard and I see a guy stomp a soda can, cool he likes to recycle! Nope, he picks that stomped can up and goes and slices the face damn near off another guy. There's Wednesday for me.

[Getter_done]

Happy new years brah!

[stegosaurus]

Jpay, srs though, it's like fck me how crazy sht gets.

Sitting on the bench on the yard and I see a guy stomp a soda can, cool he likes to recycle! Nope, he picks that stomped can up and goes and slices the face damn near off another guy. There's Wednesday for me.

lmao damn, happy new year

[Akd123]

Jpay, srs though, it's like fck me how crazy sht gets.

Sitting on the bench on the yard and I see a guy stomp a soda can, cool he likes to recycle! Nope, he picks that stomped can up and goes and slices the face damn near off another guy. There's Wednesday for me.

No fuking way. You let guys have cans?And in the yard?i can kill people with cans. ive ripped them in two and cut people with them.story for another time.Never seen cans in the joint. always plastic bottles. You gotta be working in a MIN securuty place or Cal is just straight stupid and fuked up. Probably both. Never seen cans. you can take them apart and put chitty old earbuds in them to amplify the sound lol thats old school chit. Think they use milk cartons now

[gbullock32]

No fuking way. You let guys have cans?And in the yard?i can kill people with cans. ive ripped them in two and cut people with them.story for another time.Never seen cans in the joint. always plastic bottles. You gotta be working in a MIN securuty place or Cal is just straight stupid and fuked up. Probably both. Never seen cans. you can take them apart and put chitty old earbuds in them to amplify the sound lol thats old school chit. Think they use milk cartons now

Like I said, Level 3, but with Leven 4 overrides, it gets... intense; seems like you know. More stories to come, had some sht come up at the moment. Also, yep, canteen sells packs of soda, in cans.

[Akd123]

Like I said, Level 3, but with Leven 4 overrides, it gets... intense; seems like you know. More stories to come, had some sht come up at the moment. Also, yep, canteen sells packs of soda, in cans.

Im not familiar whith waht your saying. Thats a Cali thing i think. In IL we dont have levels that i know of. Im sure there levels to everything. I watched the Superbowl with Mattew Millby Jr a few years ago. Kid brought a gun to school and shot at a cop. Nice kid really. Let me use the phone on his dime. I got a long story there with that kid.I woulf of have had that crazy kids back.fuk bullies. now hes doing like 30 years if the joint. i might write the kid

[gbullock32]

Im not familiar whith waht your saying. Thats a Cali thing i think. In IL we dont have levels that i know of. Im sure there levels to everything. I watched the Superbowl with Mattew Millby Jr a few years ago. Kid brought a gun to school and shot at a cop. Nice kid really. Let me use the phone on his dime. I got a long story there with that kid.I woulf of have had that crazy kids back.fuk bullies. now hes doing like 30 years if the joint. i might write the kid

Ah. Level 1 is minimum, level 2 is next, level 3, then level 4; basically least to most violent. I work Level 3.

[gbullock32]

All right back to it!

Working C Yard, I'm in on my day off doing overtime in Work Change, pretty much all I need to do is... nothing; Work Change is pretty much just a building inmates go through to get to the education and vocation shops and I'm there to search them as they go through. Today nothing is running so nothing for my partner or I to do. We got a heads up there's supposed to be a fight on the yard, but we aren't responders so we're just kind of watching and waiting, not sure who is supposed to fight just a rumor an informant gave up. As we are sitting there we see 2 guys start fighting, neat... then 3 jump in, then another 4. Sht, guess it's a riot. We just watch as gas grenades get thrown, and it's the nasty stuff, very strong tear gas. Well the wind blows all the gas right off the yard, it's a windy day, but the inmates get down anyways. We just watch as staff handcuff and escort the inmates, and start recalling the yard since everyone needs to write reports. Suddenly there's a knock on the bad door, a bunch of medical staff are standing there covered in snot and crying, guess the wind took all the gas right into them when they just happened to be walking by. We let them in and one of the nurses says "What happened, we were just walking and all the tear gas hit us!" Well, yeah, tear gas does that, it doesn't pick sides.

We're trying to not laugh as they all wash up in the bathroom, they're hating life, I know that feeling all too well but luckily no gas got into the building I'm in.

[jwtiger69]

All right back to it!

Working C Yard, I'm in on my day off doing overtime in Work Change, pretty much all I need to do is... nothing; Work Change is pretty much just a building inmates go through to get to the education and vocation shops and I'm there to search them as they go through. Today nothing is running so nothing for my partner or I to do. We got a heads up there's supposed to be a fight on the yard, but we aren't responders so we're just kind of watching and waiting, not sure who is supposed to fight just a rumor an informant gave up. As we are sitting there we see 2 guys start fighting, neat... then 3 jump in, then another 4. Sht, guess it's a riot. We just watch as gas grenades get thrown, and it's the nasty stuff, very strong tear gas. Well the wind blows all the gas right off the yard, it's a windy day, but the inmates get down anyways. We just watch as staff handcuff and escort the inmates, and start recalling the yard since everyone needs to write reports. Suddenly there's a knock on the bad door, a bunch of medical staff are standing there covered in snot and crying, guess the wind took all the gas right into them when they just happened to be walking by. We let them in and one of the nurses says "What happened, we were just walking and all the tear gas hit us!" Well, yeah, tear gas does that, it doesn't pick sides.

We're trying to not laugh as they all wash up in the bathroom, they're hating life, I know that feeling all too well but luckily no gas got into the building I'm in.

Haha! Good times.... It was always a good day at HDSP when you could smell the gas. I would take the gas all day over over spray.

[gbullock32]

Been raining a lot here lately, at work on D yard and it's pouring when I hear "Observation put the yard down, man down in the parkcourse." Dammit, that's like a 200 yard run (jog) so I take of running and I fcked up. I should have grabbed my jacket. By the time I get there I've got mud all over my boots and I am soaked, and all it was is a guy said he had chest pains and the yard officer he said it to (who is new) panicked and put the yard down instead of, I dunno, walking the guy 40 feet to medical. So we are all talking sht to this guy, and I got to spend the next few hours feeling wet and cold. At least I didn't slip in the mud I guess.

[gbullock32]

Another new guy story.

So working A Yard and it's just 2215, my paperwork is all done, I am on a double shift and this is shift #2, been here since 1400 and all I want to do is eat my lunch. I just take my food out of the microwave and we get a call from the officer in building 5, he has someone screaming man down. Like, motherfcker, I just wanted to eat. Now my partners are a guy on overtime, one of my regular partners, a new guy and our Sgt. This new kid has maybe 1 week in, and we all think he's an ass because he knows it all, I mean sure we've all been doing this for years but here's this new kid telling us how to do our jobs.

Since we are all right there we start heading to the building and I make it maybe 30 feet from our office and notice 'Were the fck is this new kid at?' I go back into the office and he's just sitting there at the computer, not even wearing his duty belt... I fcking lost it, I already had to tell this guy some sht earlier and this just had me snap

Me - "What the fck are you doing you dumb fcker!"

Him - "Huh?"

Me - "What the fck do you mean huh? You were right there when we had this conversation, we have a man down, get your sht on and follow me!"

Him - "Uh, what?"

Me - "Just shut the fck up, put your sht on and follow me, Now!"

He finally gets up, and we head to the building and as we get there a guy is screaming for his mother to make it stop; turns out he was ODing and was just trying to puke but he had nothing left, so he's just heaving. We are all at the cell, our Sgt. is doing the radio call for an ambulance while we glive up to handcuff this guy. We were going to send the new kid to do it, but nah, I know he will fck it up and I have one problem, I don't need 2.

I go up to the door and say "Hey man, what did you take" he wont say, sometimes they do but now this time. Ambulance gets there and we cuff this guy up, and we get a good idea, one of us needs to go with the ambulance, so new guy! So he goes with them and medical determines he needs to go to an outside hospital, since the new guy was already at our on site hospital they hold him for the hospital run. Ah well, sucks for him; the rest of us just went back to work.

[Getter_done]

Been raining a lot here lately, at work on D yard and it's pouring when I hear "Observation put the yard down, man down in the parkcourse." Dammit, that's like a 200 yard run (jog) so I take of running and I fcked up. I should have grabbed my jacket. By the time I get there I've got mud all over my boots and I am soaked, and all it was is a guy said he had chest pains and the yard officer he said it to (who is new) panicked and put the yard down instead of, I dunno, walking the guy 40 feet to medical. So we are all talking sht to this guy, and I got to spend the next few hours feeling wet and cold. At least I didn't slip in the mud I guess.

Another new guy story.

So working A Yard and it's just 2215, my paperwork is all done, I am on a double shift and this is shift #2, been here since 1400 and all I want to do is eat my lunch. I just take my food out of the microwave and we get a call from the officer in building 5, he has someone screaming man down. Like, motherfcker, I just wanted to eat. Now my partners are a guy on overtime, one of my regular partners, a new guy and our Sgt. This new kid has maybe 1 week in, and we all think he's an ass because he knows it all, I mean sure we've all been doing this for years but here's this new kid telling us how to do our jobs.

Since we are all right there we start heading to the building and I make it maybe 30 feet from our office and notice 'Were the fck is this new kid at?' I go back into the office and he's just sitting there at the computer, not even wearing his duty belt... I fcking lost it, I already had to tell this guy some sht earlier and this just had me snap

Me - "What the fck are you doing you dumb fcker!"

Him - "Huh?"

Me - "What the fck do you mean huh? You were right there when we had this conversation, we have a man down, get your sht on and follow me!"

Him - "Uh, what?"

Me - "Just shut the fck up, put your sht on and follow me, Now!"

He finally gets up, and we head to the building and as we get there a guy is screaming for his mother to make it stop; turns out he was ODing and was just trying to puke but he had nothing left, so he's just heaving. We are all at the cell, our Sgt. is doing the radio call for an ambulance while we glive up to handcuff this guy. We were going to send the new kid to do it, but nah, I know he will fck it up and I have one problem, I don't need 2.

I go up to the door and say "Hey man, what did you take" he wont say, sometimes they do but now this time. Ambulance gets there and we cuff this guy up, and we get a good idea, one of us needs to go with the ambulance, so new guy! So he goes with them and medical determines he needs to go to an outside hospital, since the new guy was already at our on site hospital they hold him for the hospital run. Ah well, sucks for him; the rest of us just went back to work.

How many new guys quit? Whats the turnover like?

[gbullock32]

How many new guys quit? Whats the turnover like?

Maybe 10-20%, had some quit day one after seeing some sht. Always wondered wtf they even started for, not like they hide anything from you in the academy; they show you videos and pictures of exactly what you are going to experience.

One women on day one saw a guy get his arm almost hacked off in a stabbing and she had a breakdown. One guy had an inmate threaten to kill him and he noped out before even half a shift.

I'll do more stories today in a bit. Some vocaroo and some typed.

[Getter_done]

Maybe 10-20%, had some quit day one after seeing some sht. Always wondered wtf they even started for, not like they hide anything from you in the academy; they show you videos and pictures of exactly what you are going to experience.

One women on day one saw a guy get his arm almost hacked off in a stabbing and she had a breakdown. One guy had an inmate threaten to kill him and he noped out before even half a shift.

I'll do more stories today in a bit. Some vocaroo and some typed.

Yeah you probably have to be pretty mentally and physically tough to do a job like that.

[gbullock32]

Yeah you probably have to be pretty mentally and physically tough to do a job like that.

More mentally TBH, it's a lot less physical than you'd think, but it does beat the sht out of your body. Wear a 15-20 pound weighted belt/vest for 8-16 hours a day for 5 days a week. Now do that for years. My back, hips, knees and one ankle are so fcked.

For a mental test, go to a mall or any place with a large crowd and try to be aware of everyone around you. Their posture, where their hands are, their body language, who they talk to, how they walk, ect. Do that for 8-16 hours.... it drains you entirely being hyper aware all day.

Also it fcks with you even outside of work, I am always aware of everyone around me, any movement, who is too close to me, I hate when people stand behind me, always try and know where doors are and if they are open or not...

[Getter_done]

More mentally TBH, it's a lot less physical than you'd think, but it does beat the sht out of your body. Wear a 15-20 pound weighted belt/vest for 8-16 hours a day for 5 days a week. Now do that for years. My back, hips, knees and one ankle are so fcked.

For a mental test, go to a mall or any place with a large crowd and try to be aware of everyone around you. Their posture, where their hands are, their body language, who they talk to, how they walk, ect. Do that for 8-16 hours.... it drains you entirely being hyper aware all day.

Also it fcks with you even outside of work, I am always aware of everyone around me, any movement, who is too close to me, I hate when people stand behind me, always try and know where doors are and if they are open or not...

Oh yeah i can imagine, how long u plan on doing this?

[gbullock32]

Watch somone get murdered or beaten, maybe a friend/partner, or deal with a riot, hostility all day, being on edge for hours... then go home and be 'normal'. It's not easy.

I started at 24, got to go until 57 for full pension, so 33 years total. If I make it, 9ish in now.

Edit: Watched one of my friends almost get choked to death, she was never the same, ended up medically retiring with PTSD. Sucks, she was a great C/O, but it just got to her. I still work with her husband, not easy for him but he plays it off, gotta be like that here and it really is hard.

[Getter_done]

Watch somone get murdered or beaten, maybe a friend/partner, or deal with a riot, hostility all day, being on edge for hours... then go home and be 'normal'. It's not easy.

I started at 24, got to go until 57 for full pension, so 33 years total. If I make it, 9ish in now.

Edit: Watched one of my friends almost get choked to death, she was never the same, ended up medically retiring with PTSD. Sucks, she was a great C/O, but it just got to her. I still work with her husband, not easy for him but he plays it off, gotta be like that here and it really is hard.

Damn yeah thats brutal.

[gbullock32]

So this was just last night, maybe 2220 and again I am on a double shift. Just heating up my food, normally when I eat my second lunch, all of my partners and I are just hanging out talking about how the last few days have been, catching up and doing paperwork before we do our security checks. One guy is off doing alarm testing (making sure certain alarms work, but we do not test the buildings at night, you know, since inmates are sleeping). Suddenly we hear over the radio "Personal alarm in Alpha 2", dafuq? This must be all bad to go straight to an alarm, if it were just something minor the Booth C/O would just call us.

Again, fck my lunch I guess, we all go running from the office, maybe 200 yards, to the building. Also, man my cardio is sht, 200 yards in full equipment and I'm dying lol. We get to the building and the Booth is at the back window looking at us like "I have no idea what the fck happened, I didn't hit an alarm." We turn the alarm off, go into the building and do a security check, nothing out of the ordinary, we are confused as hell.

The guy doing alarm testing gets there (he was way in the back testing alarms when this happened), and he walks up and says "Hey, check this out" and he pushes an alarm, the building alarm goes off again. Huh, we turn it off again and he pushes the alarm again. The building alarm goes off again, which is weird. Turns out one of our Dining Hall alarm somehow is setting off the building's alarm instead of the dining alarm. No fcking clue how that worked but whatever, mystery solved and got my cardio in for the day!