Misc I need engagement advice srs

[Dyel1991]

I need advice misc brahs. Please respect the srs tag.

Been dating gf for 3 years. She has been wanting to get married for a year. I was planning to propose in the fall and aim for a fall 2024 wedding.

She has an 11 year old dog. Healthiest, most energetic, well cared for 11 year old in the world. I was planning to propose when we took this dog hiking in Colorado in September. This week out of ****ing no where we get a cancer diagnosis. Hemangiosarcoma. Deadly. 90% of dogs are dead within 1 year. Most 6 months.

She has been telling me for years how much she wants this dog at her wedding. It’s like the only thing she cares about. He is her baby. Do I propose and try to rush an engagement and wedding to make sure this dog is there? Or is that already ruined and the focus should be on the dog in the little time he has left and not be doing crazy insane last second wedding planning?

Srs

[wigwogzigzog]

Propose. Have mini wedding with just the 3 of you just in case dog don't make it to the real 1.

Srs tho. Mini trip with you her and the dog sometime after the proposal.

[DuracellBunny]

I can't help you on this one.

My wife and I discussed getting married, decided to get married and then went and got married. Fk all the proposal and wedding stuff.

You're adults, if you want to get married, go and get married, not the engagement nonsense.

[GaryRidgway]

Is she the one that you were thinking about banging her mom?

[stevebec]

Can't help you. Pseudo-arranged marriage crew.

[Pterodactyl314]

Odd situation. If that’s what she really wants then go for it. Idk about other miscers but we didn’t care much about our timing, we got married a few months after our son was born.

[Godfrd824]

I'm all for loving your pets, but let's be serious. It's a dog, it's not a person, it's not one of her parents. You do what you think is right, but don't rush into anything because a dog is dying. Remember, you're supposed to be the man in the relationship, you're supposed to be the one who sets the tempo, the one who dictates where the relationship is going.

I can't help you on this one.

My wife and I discussed getting married, decided to get married and then went and got married. Fk all the proposal and wedding stuff.

You're adults, if you want to get married, go and get married, not the engagement nonsense.

Same here, we spent the wedding money on buying and furnishing our first house.

[bench900]

So many red flags

[darkninja67]

first off: Golden or Berner??

[kusok]

You should never allow a dog or any other living creature or a thing dictate anything related to your life and your plans,

in fact, I would be very suspicious of the stupid pageantry of expensive weddings, engagement rings, and other idiocy like a honeymoon trip, expensive wedding dresses, and other complete BS, which demonstrates that your woman is more interested in her selfish desires, rather than actually being with you.

[yewotm8]

Dogs shouldn't be at weddings. And elaborate proposal is gay.

[DesiredUserphag]

Pro Tip: Don't do it

[87dman]

If you were planning to propose go ahead and do it anyway. Then once she's accepted you can talk over options for wedding to include the dog. Could rush it, could do a small private ceremony with the dog now and then have the big day later on, but you can decide on that part together. Don't allow this to stop the plans you had.

[Jayarbie]

Propose. Have mini wedding with just the 3 of you just in case dog don't make it to the real 1.

Srs tho. Mini trip with you her and the dog sometime after the proposal.

I like this idea if that's what she wants, as long as you are 100% sure that she is the one and you want to get married. Definitely don't rush the decision to marry her because of the dog, but if the decision is a done deal, then you should try to make her happy.

[ImpressiveGainz]

I need advice misc brahs. Please respect the srs tag.

Been dating gf for 3 years. She has been wanting to get married for a year. I was planning to propose in the fall and aim for a fall 2024 wedding.

She has an 11 year old dog. Healthiest, most energetic, well cared for 11 year old in the world. I was planning to propose when we took this dog hiking in Colorado in September. This week out of ****ing no where we get a cancer diagnosis. Hemangiosarcoma. Deadly. 90% of dogs are dead within 1 year. Most 6 months.

She has been telling me for years how much she wants this dog at her wedding. It’s like the only thing she cares about. He is her baby. Do I propose and try to rush an engagement and wedding to make sure this dog is there? Or is that already ruined and the focus should be on the dog in the little time he has left and not be doing crazy insane last second wedding planning?

Srs

So basically it has nothing to do with getting married to you, it has to do with getting married with her dog there. I.e, the marriage is an event she has planned out. Have fun with that...

[jamalfudge]

Hard to say man, when a dog's health goes downhill, it goes fast. The dog might be fine for a while then they will suddenly take a turn for the worse. Even if you rush the wedding, no saying something won't happen next month. Sucks but that's the reality sometimes.

[lightsarefallin]

Thats awful, OP. I don't know what to tell you. I don't think this is a situation you should rush into even though there's a sense of emergency. I'd advise you two to communicate as openly as possible about this whole situation. Weddings are a large logistical challenge to plan and organize and it's not something you should just jump into. Maybe have a serious chat and maybe do a mini ceremony or hire a photographer and take some nice photos altogether you can cherish forever.

[piramparam]

Propose next weekend and worry about it later

[Titansfan08]

Geez sounds like she's pressuring you to rush it. If you're cool with it do it but she sounds a little crazy and I wouldn't be for rushing it. She's taking all the excitement away and sounds like she knows you'll propose soon

[DolphinPilot]

Agreed with the others; go ahead and propose now since you feel it's time and you seem to have yourself set on this woman anyways. Then do a small ceremony with the most important people + dog. Obviously your girlfriend will know if she wants a bigger wedding it will take longer to prep and the dog won't make it.

[Codo]

No, dude.

Keep things in perspective. The marriage has nothing to do with the dog and has EVERYTHING to do with you, your future, and your life.

The dog is not her baby, the dog is a pet, a luxury item.

Don't plan anything around a pet dog. That is thr advice.

It's a lovely thought. And afterwards, tell her how you had planned this and that but the dog got sick. The thought will count.

[wrassler45]

I've been with my wife for almost 18 years so let me give you some good advice. COMMUNICATE. If you cannot have a rational conversation with her about this and yalls plans then I would advise not to get married. If she is genuinely someone worth being married, then the two of you will be able to come to a proper arrangement. Also, if you love her, and this is what she wants, then I hardly find it to be a huge concession if you all were going to be engaged this year and get married.

Talk it over. You'll either be doing something your future spouse will appreciate or you will be dodging a bullet

[lightsarefallin]

I've been with my wife for almost 18 years so let me give you some good advice. COMMUNICATE. If you cannot have a rational conversation with her about this and yalls plans then I would advise not to get married. If she is genuinely someone worth being married, then the two of you will be able to come to a proper arrangement. Also, if you love her, and this is what she wants, then I hardly find it to be a huge concession if you all were going to be engaged this year and get married.

Talk it over. You'll either be doing something your future spouse will appreciate or you will be dodging a bullet

Communication is the most important aspect of a relationship. If you're unable to communicate, you're doomed from the start.

[bradlehman]

Thats awful, OP. I don't know what to tell you. I don't think this is a situation you should rush into even though there's a sense of emergency. I'd advise you two to communicate as openly as possible about this whole situation. Weddings are a large logistical challenge to plan and organize and it's not something you should just jump into. Maybe have a serious chat and maybe do a mini ceremony or hire a photographer and take some nice photos altogether you can cherish forever.

I've been with my wife for almost 18 years so let me give you some good advice. COMMUNICATE. If you cannot have a rational conversation with her about this and yalls plans then I would advise not to get married. If she is genuinely someone worth being married, then the two of you will be able to come to a proper arrangement. Also, if you love her, and this is what she wants, then I hardly find it to be a huge concession if you all were going to be engaged this year and get married.

Talk it over. You'll either be doing something your future spouse will appreciate or you will be dodging a bullet

I agree with these. Talk it over with her. Despite her desire to have the dog at her wedding, she might feel differently under the current circumstances (i.e., she may not want to rush a wedding for the sake of a dog). How she responds in this situation will likely also tell you something important about her like how she is going to behave during tough times in the future and whether you are going to be able to make reasonable compromises with her on important issues. Getting some nice professional photos of the three of you might be a good compromise idea.

[Legz422]

If you were planning to propose go ahead and do it anyway. Then once she's accepted you can talk over options for wedding to include the dog. Could rush it, could do a small private ceremony with the dog now and then have the big day later on, but you can decide on that part together. Don't allow this to stop the plans you had.

This. And I'm so sorry to hear about the pupper. Cherish every second you all have together. Take lots of pics and videos.