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  1. #1
    Registered User sc00t's Avatar
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    Sick to death of trying to clean bulk. Want some examples for dirty bulk.

    For context, I’m 36 years old and I’ve tried about 30 times to add weight clean. Chicken rice and broccoli and protein shakes etc - litres of full fat milk until I sh*t pale. And I can’t stand it anymore!

    I am very skinny but pretty lean. I want to add weight so I can get physically bigger and aside from hitting some steroids, which a) I can’t find and b) would be too soft to inject anyway, the only thing I can think of is a dirty bulk.

    But I don’t know where to start really. Other than McDonald’s.

    Does anyone have any examples of a dirty bulk daily diet? What it looks like? Best foods to cram in etc? Or is it just a case of “go ****ing nuts”? I’d imagine it’s more scientific than that.

    Cheers in advance.
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  2. #2
    Registered User paulinkansas's Avatar
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    I did a good bulk over 2 years by eating what some of my associates on special vitamins ate. Lots of beef. Steaks, hamburger, chicken, eggs, cheese, milk; lots of protein. I was probably taking in 150 grams of protein a day at a body weight of 150 pounds. I started college at 136 pounds. Was 165 when I finished grad school.
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  3. #3
    Banned Brutanez's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    For context, I’m 36 years old and I’ve tried about 30 times to add weight clean. Chicken rice and broccoli and protein shakes etc - litres of full fat milk until I sh*t pale. And I can’t stand it anymore!
    Why don't you just eat to your comfort level, and then have an extra meal or seconds or something?


    Why not just make spaghetti with meat sauce, and as the meat sauce is cooking toss some minced spinach in for your veggies?

    Spinach is good for you too and won't give you toxic farts that might mess up your lay count rate.

    What you do is first freeze a bunch in a freezer bag. Then take out the bag and crumple it. It shreds the Spinach without even needing to cut it. Then put it back in the freezer, and take it out and then put a cup of it in your spaghetti sauce or whatever as it cooks.

    Then just eat lots of spaghetti. Just don't store it in your pockets and you'll do fine.
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  4. #4
    Registered User jaxqen's Avatar
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    I would disguise myself into a trash panda and find out where Paul lives.
    Then I would wait.

    Pizza
    Macaroni
    Sausages
    Ice cream
    Friday would be lasagna night

    This is how you do a dirty bulk.
    A proper one!
    I like to learn from the mistakes of the people who take my advice.
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  5. #5
    Registered User air2fakie's Avatar
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    If you're not having an entire old school box of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese every day for a mid-afternoon snack (the kind where you add a stick of butter to the cheese powder), you're not dirty bulking.
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  6. #6
    team ketchup AdamWW's Avatar
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    So you failed 29 times and just had to try a 30th before realizing you're doing it wrong?

    Hmm..
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  7. #7
    Registered User paulinkansas's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jaxqen View Post
    I would disguise myself into a trash panda and find out where Paul lives.
    Then I would wait.

    Pizza
    Macaroni
    Sausages
    Ice cream
    Friday would be lasagna night
    Good guess. Tonight feeding them some 3 day old pizza and 5 day old pork tenderloins (sausage).
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  8. #8
    Registered User sc00t's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by AdamWW View Post
    So you failed 29 times and just had to try a 30th before realizing you're doing it wrong?

    Hmm..
    Insightful. Cheers.
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  9. #9
    team ketchup AdamWW's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    Insightful. Cheers.
    Well you're asking really weird questions. You claim to have tried like, everything possible, except just eating more calories.

    Why would it need to be mcdonalds?

    I can make a PBJ sandwich that's like 600 calories easy... eat two of those and a protein shake and that's like 1400 calories right there....
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  10. #10
    Han shot first! TolerantLactose's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    For context
    You've given zero useful context. Height? Weight before and after? Waist measurements before and after? Progress pics?
    Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?
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  11. #11
    Registered User air2fakie's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TolerantLactose View Post
    You've given zero useful context. Height? Weight before and after? Waist measurements before and after? Progress pics?
    He's skinny but pretty lean. Is that not synonymous enough for you?
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  12. #12
    Han shot first! TolerantLactose's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by air2fakie View Post
    He's skinny but pretty lean. Is that not synonymous enough for you?
    I'm trying to be nice.

    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    Currently I look like a bin bag of jelly: imgur.com/a/qRTfjsY 5 ft 10 and I would estimate approx 190lbs
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  13. #13
    team ketchup AdamWW's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TolerantLactose View Post
    I'm trying to be nice.
    I find his appearance the least concerning thing in that room
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  14. #14
    Registered User sc00t's Avatar
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    The internet is a pretty ****ty place.

    Those photos are about right for me as it stands today and I’m just here in my underpants asking for help.

    Thanks guys. Putting myself out there and getting a few proper wankers taking the piss. Hope it makes you feel good about yourselves.

    “Oh. I am muscly. I’m the best. Oh. This guys he knows nothing. Let’s take the piss out of him. We are the best.”

    Pair of tossers.

    I just came here to ask for some help. I’m having a really bad time right now. I want to focus on something, and that something is building myself in size and muscle instead of drinking myself to death or sitting around smoking weed until I can’t think anymore. So I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Great guys. Living your best lives aren’t you? Your mothers would love your replies wouldn’t they?

    Suck a dick.
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  15. #15
    Han shot first! TolerantLactose's Avatar
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    Not taking a piss but you needed a hard wake-up. If that pic from months ago is still accurate, you're in no place to bulk, "clean" or not. You need to lose at least 40 lbs before you should even consider it.
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  16. #16
    Registered User air2fakie's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    The internet is a pretty ****ty place.

    Those photos are about right for me as it stands today and I’m just here in my underpants asking for help.

    Thanks guys. Putting myself out there and getting a few proper wankers taking the piss. Hope it makes you feel good about yourselves.

    “Oh. I am muscly. I’m the best. Oh. This guys he knows nothing. Let’s take the piss out of him. We are the best.”

    Pair of tossers.

    I just came here to ask for some help. I’m having a really bad time right now. I want to focus on something, and that something is building myself in size and muscle instead of drinking myself to death or sitting around smoking weed until I can’t think anymore. So I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Great guys. Living your best lives aren’t you? Your mothers would love your replies wouldn’t they?

    Suck a dick.
    For the record, I did answer your Q.

    And you didn't actually ask for help. You've already made a decision to dirty bulk, and are asking for examples of things to eat.

    If you had asked for actual help based on what you wrote, I would've told you that if you've tried 30x to add weight clean & that is still your physique, your problem is your whatever training programs you were doing, & a lack of effort, discipline and/or consistency.
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  17. #17
    team ketchup AdamWW's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    The internet is a pretty ****ty place.

    Those photos are about right for me as it stands today and I’m just here in my underpants asking for help.

    Thanks guys. Putting myself out there and getting a few proper wankers taking the piss. Hope it makes you feel good about yourselves.

    “Oh. I am muscly. I’m the best. Oh. This guys he knows nothing. Let’s take the piss out of him. We are the best.”

    Pair of tossers.

    I just came here to ask for some help. I’m having a really bad time right now. I want to focus on something, and that something is building myself in size and muscle instead of drinking myself to death or sitting around smoking weed until I can’t think anymore. So I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Great guys. Living your best lives aren’t you? Your mothers would love your replies wouldn’t they?

    Suck a dick.
    WTF are u talking about ?

    Ur about as sensitive as a pre-schooler
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  18. #18
    Registered User erigni's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    The internet is a pretty ****ty place.

    Those photos are about right for me as it stands today and I’m just here in my underpants asking for help.

    Thanks guys. Putting myself out there and getting a few proper wankers taking the piss. Hope it makes you feel good about yourselves.

    “Oh. I am muscly. I’m the best. Oh. This guys he knows nothing. Let’s take the piss out of him. We are the best.”

    Pair of tossers.

    I just came here to ask for some help. I’m having a really bad time right now. I want to focus on something, and that something is building myself in size and muscle instead of drinking myself to death or sitting around smoking weed until I can’t think anymore. So I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me. Great guys. Living your best lives aren’t you? Your mothers would love your replies wouldn’t they?

    Suck a dick.
    You should focus on losing weight, not building muscle. Just work out and avoid eating too much and sugary foods, especially alcohol.
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  19. #19
    Edgerunner faithbrah's Avatar
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    what nobody mentioned yet is that you have the wrong idea about clean and dirty bulking. foods themselves aren't clean or dirty, but there is clean and dirty bulking, it just has nothing to do with the foods you eat. why are you trying to eat "clean" anyway? it's not like you'll make less gains if you throw in any "dirty" foods

    clean (lean) bulking is a surplus of 200-300 calories so you can limit unnecessary fat gain. eating mcdonalds and ice cream is still a clean bulk if the surplus is that small

    dirty bulking is a surplus of 500+ (often 1000 or so) calories and you'll gain a ton of fat instead. eating rice and chicken is still a dirty bulk if the surplus is that big
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  20. #20
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    Originally Posted by sc00t View Post
    For context, I’m 36 years old and I’ve tried about 30 times to add weight clean. Chicken rice and broccoli and protein shakes etc - litres of full fat milk until I sh*t pale. And I can’t stand it anymore!

    I am very skinny but pretty lean. I want to add weight so I can get physically bigger and aside from hitting some steroids, which a) I can’t find and b) would be too soft to inject anyway, the only thing I can think of is a dirty bulk.

    But I don’t know where to start really. Other than McDonald’s.

    Does anyone have any examples of a dirty bulk daily diet? What it looks like? Best foods to cram in etc? Or is it just a case of “go ****ing nuts”? I’d imagine it’s more scientific than that.

    Cheers in advance.
    In my opinion just maintain your weight at 190 lbs, get on a good routine structured mainly around compound movements and stick to it consistently. Track your strength progress, take progress pictures and waist measurements along the way, these should all improve over time or you're doing something wrong.
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    Originally Posted by EiFit91 View Post
    In my opinion just maintain your weight at 190 lbs, get on a good routine structured mainly around compound movements and stick to it consistently. Track your strength progress, take progress pictures and waist measurements along the way, these should all improve over time or you're doing something wrong.
    ^^^this, Sc00t.
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    Does anyone have any examples of a dirty bulk daily diet? What it looks like? Best foods to cram in etc?
    Go by calories and macros. Not by names of foods.
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