Any dudes here 30+ happy with casual sex and not being committing to a woman?

[BornagaininUES]

Mainstream society and the misc say you are supposed to be miserable if you live this way but I just hate LTRs and committing to women. I feel like I am so into my life, my business, my work, and my hobbies that women are good for company, chatter, and sex but that's it.

I also imagine society will judge you harshly and say that you are weird, odd, or messed up but the men I know in real life like this are happier than the married and recently divorced guys.

Sometimes I wonder if its crabs in a bucket by other men. They know they messed up marrying quick or marrying the wrong woman so they hate the men who have freedoms in life and try to make them feel bad for being bachelors.

Unfortunately this school of though has infested the misc too.

Wanted to know if men on here are happy being bachelors and casually dating without commitment.

No FAs please.

[GeezersPalace]

Everything I would say is right there, I just tried a relationship again recently, i'm 37 and for 6 months I was over with it. The key issue is children and family, You have to in my opinion still have kids if you want kids. Most relationships now are pretty terrible, you won't see this though because of social media and men being cucks, Most decent-looking women even in a marriage will test the waters and date, someone, when together when things get hard, this was on the misc yesterday.

The best situation I belive you can do is be good at work, make good money, remain fit and attractive, have children, but don't see them as much, the kids will still love you and you can still travel and do what you want, also phuck who you want.

It depends where you live, If you are in a non metropolis people will think your weird, but most americans are total dumbsh*ts so who cares?

Like i said being single phucking around is the goat, but the key issue missing out is children, if you want children you will run into problems I feel unless your an alpha seed planter like me. The guys on here who say marriagei s great never mention their wives it's always, I love being married becasue of my kids etc etc.

[RagnarChadbrok]

Only 26 but yeah, happy with it. I really can't see myself only fking one girl forever, would get insanely bored and frustrated

[willinguniform0]

I think marriage works for other cultures but american society is so fked up its hard to find enough common ground that will last a lifetime. Doable but it's very hard, you need to filter through hundreds of ppl. Easier to pair up when you're a teenager. Most ppl I know that are in happy 10+ year relationships met in highschool and never dated anyone else. Growing up together builds a strong foundation.

[Techriding101]

out of a LTR, get lonely/sad every now and then but then realize I am only remembering the good parts of the relationship. The reality is i was miserable 90% of the time i spent with her

[randomuser12345]

I guess i wouldn't mind ltr with some prime girl. But relationship isn't always sex and hugs and rainbows

[droc81yo]

Everything I would say is right there, I just tried a relationship again recently, i'm 37 and for 6 months I was over with it. The key issue is children and family, You have to in my opinion still have kids if you want kids. Most relationships now are pretty terrible, you won't see this though because of social media and men being cucks, Most decent-looking women even in a marriage will test the waters and date, someone, when together when things get hard, this was on the misc yesterday.

The best situation I belive you can do is be good at work, make good money, remain fit and attractive, have children, but don't see them as much, the kids will still love you and you can still travel and do what you want, also phuck who you want.

It depends where you live, If you are in a non metropolis people will think your weird, but most americans are total dumbsh*ts so who cares?

Like i said being single phucking around is the goat, but the key issue missing out is children, if you want children you will run into problems I feel unless your an alpha seed planter like me. The guys on here who say marriagei s great never mention their wives it's always, I love being married becasue of my kids etc etc.

You nailed it. Just got out of a 10 year marriage and I'm 40. It sucks only banging one woman the rest of your life, but I would have stuck it out if she didn't get obese AF and not change. Now I date and only see my kids every other weekend. Miss the kids, but love the freedom of doing whatever the hell I want and getting fresh vagina.

[MetalliNattyCa]

You nailed it. Just got out of a 10 year marriage and I'm 40. It sucks only banging one woman the rest of your life, but I would have stuck it out if she didn't get obese AF and not change. Now I date and only see my kids every other weekend. Miss the kids, but love the freedom of doing whatever the hell I want and getting fresh vagina.

How´s been getting back in the game at 40 after 10 years out of it? I´m also 40, in a relationship for 8 years and maybe things end in the near future, and i know things have changed a lot since the last time i was single.

[chivasregal]

I’m 32. Divorced after 29. I had so much fun right after my divorced not being committed to anyone and just having fun.
I got a girlfriend in September 2020 but I never felt fully happy. Broke up March 2021 and have been single since then.

I love being able to talk to any girl, doing whatever I want, whoever I want with no repercussions. Family says i should settle, but why?

I know the feel, OP.

[BornagaininUES]

I have never been married and don't intend to, it gets me that most men if they do not get married are divorced guys who now realize their freedoms. Both are tough situations to be in.

What about men who just flat out sleep around their whole lives and don't commit?

[akmerle]

I got married at 20, divorced at 30, and remarried at 42. Basically single from 30-40, with the longest relationship during that run being about a year and a half.

Was a huge learning experience over that time, and genuinely enjoyed the process of basically having to re-learn who I was as an adult.

The freedom to do whatever i wanted, while also having the security of being stable in a well paying career was a huge benefit.

Dating was basically on EASY mode while being a relatively young looking / in shape / successful male. Essentially dating window of females between 18-45.

Eventually found the right girl (at the right time).

[cam1987]

Never got married but was in a 10 year relationship. Last 2 years of being single have been amazing. Dated more women than I ever have even during college. I will say getting back into the game is hard. Not because it's hard finding dates, it's very easy for 30 something single guys who are successful and good looking. Trying to find a woman who you click with on an emotional and mental level is the hard part. Looks only go so far and with most women, I feel like I would need to settle. That never ends well with relationships. The older we get, the more stuck in our ways we become and less willing to compromise the freedoms we have.

Also, marriage scares me, mostly because I've seen how many family members, friends and coworkers have gotten screwed. The only people who I know that aren't divorced are those that got married in their 30's, like my parents and a few cousins. Plus marriage is a huge commitment. Not ruling it out, just don't want it now. Am I content just hooking up for the rest of my life? Yes. Do I miss being in a stable relationship? Honestly sometimes but having the taste of freedom makes it hard to go back to that.

[JerG]

I'm 31 and single. Have never even been in a long-term relationship. Dated a handful of girls in my early/mid 20's.

I wouldn't say I'm happy, but I'm not really unhappy either ... I don't think being in a committed relationship would make me any happier. I value my freedom A LOT. I hate feeling tied down. I like going to the gym when I want, sleeping when I want, eating when I want, etc. At this point I look around and girls in their 30's (even most in late 20's) are generally unappealing. I don't feel like I'm missing out. Honestly feel like at this point it would be a miracle if I found the right girl to be with. Not complaining though.

[Silencespeaks]

No idea what men 30+ are doing since I don’t talk to them but I can tell you men 20-25 are very happy with casual sex lifestyle. They can date any hot prime 20 year old girls they want but they like being single and don’t want gf’s srs.

[Gosu14]

How about have casual sex even in a relationship? That’s the double win there

[Nicklol]

If you can get a steady rotation of girls / new girls.. it is amazing

but when you are only able to a handful a year.. its kind of not worth it.
thats why I keep any girl around I can or maybe a gf is better

[alltrapbrah]

I always think people perceive this topic is such a strange way.

What would you rather have? A best friend or multiple friends?

I ask this question because people tend to view friendship more level-heatedly. I’m sure some folk would prefer multiple friends, but i’m betting the majority would prefer having a best bud.

No one ever “settled” for a best friend. It is something that happens organically, and if the right person never comes along you end up having a bunch of friends rather than a best friend.

But when it comes to opposite sex relations, people will “settle”. It’s like looking at all your acquaintances and deciding “okay, Bob has a slight edge over the rest, so from this point forward he can be my best bud”. It’s weird, and my point is you would never entertain such a process for a best friend, yet it’s somewhat normal to do it for your long-term partner or whatever.

[elterrible987]

I always think people perceive this topic is such a strange way.

What would you rather have? A best friend or multiple friends?

I ask this question because people tend to view friendship more level-heatedly. I’m sure some folk would prefer multiple friends, but i’m betting the majority would prefer having a best bud.

No one ever “settled” for a best friend. It is something that happens organically, and if the right person never comes along you end up having a bunch of friends rather than a best friend.

But when it comes to opposite sex relations, people will “settle”. It’s like looking at all your acquaintances and deciding “okay, Bob has a slight edge over the rest, so from this point forward he can be my best bud”. It’s weird, and my point is you would never entertain such a process for a best friend, yet it’s somewhat normal to do it for your long-term partner or whatever.

It depends on your sexual chemistry too. Like Mike is my best friend but he also gives the best blow jobs out of my friend circle so thats why we are closer than the others. Jeremy has some teethy blow jobs.

[elterrible987]

I think marriage works for other cultures but american society is so fked up its hard to find enough common ground that will last a lifetime. Doable but it's very hard, you need to filter through hundreds of ppl. Easier to pair up when you're a teenager. Most ppl I know that are in happy 10+ year relationships met in highschool and never dated anyone else. Growing up together builds a strong foundation.

It is pretty bad, i think once people get past a certain age they cant properly pair bond. and with apps these days it seems like some new chad or stacy is always around the corner so nobody wants to commit or if things get rough they all think they can do better. Yeah most people I know of still together got together young and so were basically unaffected by modern dating

[BornagaininUES]

I wonder what happened to men in the past few years or maybe it is the misc and online forums attracting the worse. I do not need a woman to keep me happy and when I do get clicking with one, we are great with casual sex and her occasionally tagging along. My life is too busy and fun with lots going on that I cannot dedicate the time to an LTR, marriage, and especially not kids.

What I find is that most men who are fulfilled in life, happy with themselves, and have lots of hobbies and things going on are perfectly content with a GF or just having a rotation.

The men who need a woman for an LTR and emotional support tend to be men who need a shoulder to cry on. Most of them are emotionally vulnerable and cannot find much interesting things going on in their own lives so they cling to LTRs.

Maybe I am odd but I do not see a problem with being single, having a rotation, being committed to your hobbies, and living life.

[FarmersSon]

I wonder what happened to men in the past few years or maybe it is the misc and online forums attracting the worse. I do not need a woman to keep me happy and when I do get clicking with one, we are great with casual sex and her occasionally tagging along. My life is too busy and fun with lots going on that I cannot dedicate the time to an LTR, marriage, and especially not kids.

What I find is that most men who are fulfilled in life, happy with themselves, and have lots of hobbies and things going on are perfectly content with a GF or just having a rotation.

The men who need a woman for an LTR and emotional support tend to be men who need a shoulder to cry on. Most of them are emotionally vulnerable and cannot find much interesting things going on in their own lives so they cling to LTRs.

Maybe I am odd but I do not see a problem with being single, having a rotation, being committed to your hobbies, and living life.

I'm not sure I follow what you are saying in your first sentence. It wasn't that long ago that a large portion of society didn't consider you a man until you showed you could support a family. I think it is a good thing that society has moved away from judging men by that standard.

I think it is good for a man to be happy and fulfilled regardless of his relationship status, but I think having a marriage and family is a good thing, too, and a worthy objective to seek after. It's been my observation that people who aren't happy on there own make poor partners in life, because it's even more complicated to be happy in a partnership than it is as a single person. As far as emotional stability, it is nice to have someone to talk to, and it is good to know my wife has my back in everything. At the same time it is my job to be the emotional rock of our family. In 18 years of marriage, I think the only time my wife has seen me truly heartbroken and cry was in the first 10 minutes after we found out we'd lost a baby. Honestly, I think showing a bit more emotion would probably be a good thing, but at this point I probably am what I am. Anyhow, I'm all for people seeking after happiness in whatever way suits them, but I don't think you should necessarily assume that people seek after long-term commitments out of weakness.

[alltrapbrah]

It depends on your sexual chemistry too. Like Mike is my best friend but he also gives the best blow jobs out of my friend circle so thats why we are closer than the others. Jeremy has some teethy blow jobs.

This is exactly my point. Mike is your best friend cos he sucks your dick well? Like wtf.

You shouldn’t be able to pinpoint why Mike is your best friend. He just is because it happened that way and you love his (tight) ass.

[skinnyfat88]

I had something with a lot of longterm potential not work out not too long ago.

Might be a while before I have the desire to date seriously again but that's okay because (as others mentioned), I don't crave it given I have enough other things in my life to keep me fulfilled.
Getting attention from women isn't that difficult and I'm getting better at the conversations regarding managing their expectations for short-term casual stuff. Many times they respect your honesty and stick around a while to enjoy your company/see if you'll change your mind.

[BornagaininUES]

I am approaching my 30s and still, do not see how men get so obsessed with wanting company and an LTR. Like I see so much whining on misc about a girlfriend when really, I feel like I am happy not being tied down and just having a rotation going. Weird chit I guess.

[G1adi4tor88]

It is pretty bad, i think once people get past a certain age they cant properly pair bond. and with apps these days it seems like some new chad or stacy is always around the corner so nobody wants to commit or if things get rough they all think they can do better. Yeah most people I know of still together got together young and so were basically unaffected by modern dating

I know that feel. I'm 33 and at this age I'm wondering if real pair bonding is even an option for me. If it happens now it certainly won't be in the same way as in your early 20's where you ignorantly go all in.

And yeah, most of the happy couples I know got together in high school or college.

[G1adi4tor88]

I am approaching my 30s and still, do not see how men get so obsessed with wanting company and an LTR. Like I see so much whining on misc about a girlfriend when really, I feel like I am happy not being tied down and just having a rotation going. Weird chit I guess.

I don't care as much about the LTR/company with the woman as I do about the relationship I'd have with my kids. If you have kids in your early 40's then when they are 10 you are already in your 50's and slowing down. By the time they are teenagers you are approaching retirement and I'd say pretty disconnected from what they are going through in life. At this point even being 5 years younger on your end would probably make a big difference in you being able to relate to them and keep up with them. I'd much rather have kids in my 30's than 40's for this reason and that drives my "obsession" more than anything else.

The company with the sloot would be great too but I've learned that sloots come and go too easily especially nowadays. As I get older I place less stock on my enjoyment of her company as much as I do on her being a good mother to my kids as she and I may split but she'll still always be the mother of my kids.

[BornagaininUES]

We are thinking differently then, I don't actually want to have kids.

[G1adi4tor88]

We are thinking differently then, I don't actually want to have kids.

I didn't either until just this year. It hit me out of nowhere.

[BornagaininUES]

I didn't either until just this year. It hit me out of nowhere.

adopt?

[G1adi4tor88]

I don't think that's for me. At least not at this time.