Get in shape or die

[txbass97]

I say this because my mental health and physical health has gone off the deep end.

I started lifting when I was 15 years old. Socially apprehensive and complete loser. By age 17 it was religion to me.

Freshman year 130lb. stick 15-16%BF
Sophomore year swam competitively / lifted a little heavier 150lbs 12-13% BF
Junior year dropped swimming, 100% lifting. 175lbs. 10% body fat
Senior year eat breathe sleep fitness. No sweets, counting cals, water/protein only, messed with pro hormones ~3 months 185# 8% BF.
It all stopped when I just started skipping workouts a few times a week, then it became only 2-3 workouts a week, then it stopped completely.

Joined the USMC, and I got lean and mean in bootcamp. But the lifting drive never came back. Went to the gym maybe 2-3 times a week for spurts of 3-6 months, stopped for a few months. repeat. Depression / anxiety kicked in hard, started drinking heavily and binge eating to deal with the stress. 3 years into my 4 year contract, I was Black out drunk at a bar and back flopped on the concrete, hit the back of my head so hard I was out cold for 10 minutes. Pretty bad concussion. Went back to work too soon and had another concussion 2 months later. Was pulled from my MOS (job). Went through speech therapy, balance therapy, memory therapy etc. The Military Medically Retired me with just over 4 years of service.

I've been out since Feb 2021. No motivation to do anything, binge eat to feel good, drink a couple of beers just to fall asleep because of the anxiety / insomnia. Depression blows too so I just eat the good stuff for that 2 minute feel good then it goes away.

If I keep this up I'm not going to be here much longer. So it's time to make a change.

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result. It's cliche but I am living proof.

From my previous knowledge, I am skinny fat. Kyphosis from looking at phone / computer, anterior pelvic tilt from sitting down all day. No flexibility in ankles/hips to squat. Mental health is easy to pinpoint, no exercise is causing it.

Just want to say to anyone who is just starting out. Have hope. I'm about to put myself through hell and back to fix my body which in turn will fix my mental health issues. I've done this before, it sucked at first, but eventually it becomes your new life, and you will thank yourself for it.

Wish me luck. I've really got no other ideas.