New Dad Motivation - Cheat codes needed

[iamclarky]

Hey, I'm only 33 so not quite 35 but I'm hoping over35s will have the answers.

Just become a dad for the first time, son is currently 7 months old. Haven't worked out consistently for the best part of a year and a half due to lockdowns etc...

I hate running / bw home workouts so with gyms closed I've been screwed staying active.

Currently sitting best part of 10kgs overweight, perpetually tired and unmotivated.

Don't seem to have any time or money to look after myself.

Does anyone have any experience of this rut? any tips for getting back on track?

Any advice would be really appreciated

[lukepeter]

I'm 32, with a 10 year old and a 5 year old... not sure if it satisfies your criteria for life experience, but lets try.

I gained a bunch of weight after my son was born, lifestyle changed from training upwards of 3 hours a day (not exclusively lifting, but very active with 5 day a week lifting thrown on top), to next to zero physical activity, and gaming at home... After my daughter was born, I found myself disinclined to take part in the same sort of activities I did when my son was a lighty, and it didnt sit well with me. So I started training again, with less obsession than before, but regularly, despite not enjoying it and finding it uncomfortable. I ate less sugar etc, and got more sleep as a rule.

At the end of the day, I wanted to change more than I wanted to eat like crap, and sit on my arse... So I skipped a couple episodes of series a week, and exercised instead, I spent less money on eating out, so I could spend more on good food etc.

[lukepeter]

People are weird, we often look at our life and think "how the hell can I afford to exercise and train, no time, no money", when there is plenty of both, that only requires that we shuffle priorities around and experience some discomfort. Maybe you are one of the dudes that is working 3 jobs, barely making enough money to stay above the bread line, and caring for his kid on his own (I suspect this is not the case) - then sure, you can't afford the time or the money to train and eat cleanly.

[lukepeter]

But its far more likely, that you simply don't care enough to prioritize healthy living and self care (which directly benefits your kid, your partner, and yourself) over quadrant 4 waste activities and comfortable indolence (I've been there). It's evident in many people who lead unhealthy lives (myself included) no money for a gym membership (drinks a bunch of alcohol every week), cant afford healthy food (smokes a couple packs a day), don't have the time to train (has binge watched 10 different series over the past 3 months).

The hardest lift, at least in my experience, is always the one off the couch and into a pair of training shoes - whether its to go exercise, or start a new project in the garage etc. Just get up and make a start - it doesnt take a lot, 45 mins 4 times a week, or even less when you start out.

Happy hunting. (posted multiple times since forum is being ****ty)

[ArchAngel'73]

I hate running / bw home workouts so with gyms closed I've been screwed staying active.

This is a choice.
You can chose to suck up less than optimal conditions or you can chose to do nothing, waste away, and die earlier than you might have if you looked after yourself.

Should you do the latter, when your kid is a teenager you will be a fat slob. They will probably not listen to you and be embarrassed to be seen with you in public. They will lip off to you and you won't be fast enough to slap them upside the head.
When that kid is in his/her early 20's and in dire need of life advice from his/her parents you will be suffering from the effects of diabetes, heart issues, probably depression, and your sex life will be in the shi**er.
You will probably die earlier than what you should, leave your kid to fend for themselves in this f'ed up world, and won't live long enough to see grand kids. Throw a good probability of divorce in there too.

I didn't write that to "motivate" you...motivation is far to fleeting and temporary. I wrote that hoping to instill a spark within you and remind you of what your role as a father is, and that includes being around and healthy for as long as possible.

Years from now your son/daughter might be asking you "Daddy, what did you do during the pandemic of 2020/2021?"
You will either be able to tell him/her that you did what you could, fought on, and adapted
or
that you gave up when things got difficult.

Again, this is your choice.

[iamclarky]

F me guys, thank you. Its amazing how getting called out on my own BS can flip the switch from wallowing in self pity to fired up for the challenge.

I've dug out the old Tupperware and got to meal prepping for the rest of the week. Will work on an exercise solution as the household budget wont extend to a gym membersip until the missus goes back to work.

Thank you again

[mtpockets]

This is a choice.
You can chose to suck up less than optimal conditions or you can chose to do nothing, waste away, and die earlier than you might have if you looked after yourself.

Should you do the latter, when your kid is a teenager you will be a fat slob. They will probably not listen to you and be embarrassed to be seen with you in public. They will lip off to you and you won't be fast enough to slap them upside the head.
When that kid is in his/her early 20's and in dire need of life advice from his/her parents you will be suffering from the effects of diabetes, heart issues, probably depression, and your sex life will be in the shi**er.
You will probably die earlier than what you should, leave your kid to fend for themselves in this f'ed up world, and won't live long enough to see grand kids. Throw a good probability of divorce in there too.

I didn't write that to "motivate" you...motivation is far to fleeting and temporary. I wrote that hoping to instill a spark within you and remind you of what your role as a father is, and that includes being around and healthy for as long as possible.

Years from now your son/daughter might be asking you "Daddy, what did you do during the pandemic of 2020/2021?"
You will either be able to tell him/her that you did what you could, fought on, and adapted
or
that you gave up when things got difficult.

Again, this is your choice.

^^^^ This says it all!!



Good luck op

[lukepeter]

F me guys, thank you. Its amazing how getting called out on my own BS can flip the switch from wallowing in self pity to fired up for the challenge.

I've dug out the old Tupperware and got to meal prepping for the rest of the week. Will work on an exercise solution as the household budget wont extend to a gym membersip until the missus goes back to work.

Thank you again

GJDM. set up a training/weight loss log here, it helps with adherence, and outside of the Misc, people are incredibly supportive (in the category of encouragement, and hard truths when required ) wishing you discipline.

[xTeTe]

I always tell my friends with kids that use having them as an excuse to not exercise.... would you rather carve out 30 minutes a day now to stay in shape so you can live a long life and be there for your kids as long as possible... or run the risk of dying early from a heart attack and missing out on many years later? Even if not that extreme, poor lifestyle choices will burden them later in life when you are in rough shape and can't do much for yourself toward the end of your life.

[GrouchyUSMC]

Hey, I'm only 33 so not quite 35 but I'm hoping over35s will have the answers.

Just become a dad for the first time, son is currently 7 months old. Haven't worked out consistently for the best part of a year and a half due to lockdowns etc...

I hate running / bw home workouts so with gyms closed I've been screwed staying active.

Currently sitting best part of 10kgs overweight, perpetually tired and unmotivated.

Don't seem to have any time or money to look after myself.

Does anyone have any experience of this rut? any tips for getting back on track?

Any advice would be really appreciated

I think you answered it yourself. You hate running and bodyweight workouts, but those are probably the best two things to be doing right now when you have nothing else available. You just need a bit more variety to keep it interesting.

Try this.

http://site.stewsmithptclub.com/45dayplan.pdf

[air2fakie]

F me guys, thank you. Its amazing how getting called out on my own BS can flip the switch from wallowing in self pity to fired up for the challenge.

I've dug out the old Tupperware and got to meal prepping for the rest of the week. Will work on an exercise solution as the household budget wont extend to a gym membersip until the missus goes back to work.

Thank you again

Be honest with your priorities and if getting into shape is high on the list, do something about it. If not, then so be it. If you hate running, play some pickup sports like basketball - you're 33 not 63. Then do some boring bodyweight exercises around the park or playground equipment.

And meal prepping with Tupperware is great if you need to do it mentally in order to control calories, but totally unnecessary in the list of things to do to get healthy.

[EiFit91]

Hey, I'm only 33 so not quite 35 but I'm hoping over35s will have the answers.

Just become a dad for the first time, son is currently 7 months old. Haven't worked out consistently for the best part of a year and a half due to lockdowns etc...

I hate running / bw home workouts so with gyms closed I've been screwed staying active.

Currently sitting best part of 10kgs overweight, perpetually tired and unmotivated.

Don't seem to have any time or money to look after myself.

Does anyone have any experience of this rut? any tips for getting back on track?

Any advice would be really appreciated

I have three kids, 30 years old (so subforum insiders forgive me for intruding). I piled on fat in my 20s. Having lost about 60 pounds now I can definitely say I would have preferred to turn it around sooner. If you think about it, you can definitely find time for it. Try to think of how much time you spend just surfing pointlessly online. Just a fraction of that time could be spent working out and you would already be in much better shape.

BW exercises can be fun and very challenging, but you don't need a lot of equipment to do your workouts with added resistance at home. For instance, buy a pullup bar, some plates and a dip belt. Maybe a couple of dumbbells. Do weighted pushups and weighted pullups at home, use progressive overload over time. I made a home gym in my basement to not have to travel to the gym to work out. For many it's getting out the door that is the challenge, but with a home gym or equiptment at home you have no excuse.

I also hate running and cannot sustain structured cardio, so I push my youngest daughter (< 1 year old) in a stroller almost every day and try to do more work around the house to get more activity. Sometimes she won't sleep unless I run so then I run, otherwise I never run. Try to incorporate some form of activity in your daily life.

[BaseJumper]

If you want to go as minimalist as possible, a pull up bar and two kettlebells (16kg and 24kg) can give your whole body a good workout. During the first wave, that's all I had and I was able to lose weight even during lockdowns.

I guess it's all on your mentality. You've got to convince yourself that you're doing it because you want, not because you're forced to.

[jademonkey]

Have you tried UUDDLRLRBA?

[Grifter3511]

Have you tried UUDDLRLRBA?

That's utterly pointless! That won't do anything! You left out Select/Start

[reallymj]

F me guys, thank you. Its amazing how getting called out on my own BS can flip the switch from wallowing in self pity to fired up for the challenge.

I've dug out the old Tupperware and got to meal prepping for the rest of the week. Will work on an exercise solution as the household budget wont extend to a gym membership until the missus goes back to work.

Thank you again

A gym membership is $10 a month for me. If you can't find a way to come up with an extra $10 a month there's no excuse not to go to a park and run or shoot some hoops to stay active. I have 5 kids myself (2 months to 12) and I understand it's been hard with covid and all to get out and train. I took a year off, but I've been back at it for 2 months now. I've lost close to 20 pounds now and almost back to where I want to be. Just get a calorie counting app and eat what you need to to survive.

[SwoleCPA]

I also hate running and cannot sustain structured cardio, so I push my youngest daughter (< 1 year old) in a stroller almost every day and try to do more work around the house to get more activity. Sometimes she won't sleep unless I run so then I run, otherwise I never run. Try to incorporate some form of activity in your daily life.

I was going to suggest this also. By pushing a stroller, you get your exercise and spend time with your kid.

Find something that you like and look forward to doing for a workout. It doesn't have to be in a gym. Walking, biking, hiking...anything is better than doing nothing.

[mtpockets]

Hey, I'm only 33 so not quite 35 but I'm hoping over35s will have the answers.

Just become a dad for the first time, son is currently 7 months old. Haven't worked out consistently for the best part of a year and a half due to lockdowns etc...

I hate running / bw home workouts so with gyms closed I've been screwed staying active.

Currently sitting best part of 10kgs overweight, perpetually tired and unmotivated.

Don't seem to have any time or money to look after myself.

Does anyone have any experience of this rut? any tips for getting back on track?

Any advice would be really appreciated

Sounds like you don't want it bad enough..

Your child should be motivation enough to maintain a level of fintness that will promote your longevity..

Stop with the dumbass excuses and get it done or not

[frankdtank20]

42 yrs old. Have a 6 yr old and 1 yr old. Helps that I can do 4 hrs of sleep for days in a row, which I know is not normal, so I have a personal cheat code there.

Anyway, get some light to moderate dumbbells and moderate to heavy kettlebells for at home and a weight vest. Plenty of HIIT workout ideas out there, or create your own workout. I prefer ones where I'm gassed in 20 minutes, 30 at most. You're still nearby if needed.

Basic - Weight in a backpack and do pushups, keeping weight high on back. Weighted pushups are superior to bench press anyway. Add the weight vest if needed.

Jumping squats (ass to the grass range of motion) as high as you can with 15 -30 lb dumbbells.

I like finishing a home workout with a complex set or two. With or without weight vest, light/moderate dumbbells in hand do all the following:

-burpee, with a real full pushup
-after jumping back up, double bicep curl
-then do a clean with dumbbells. Hold at top there
-do a thruster. Drop DBs back down at side
- jumping squat

That's 1. Do as many as you can. I like doing them for time. A great finisher set or two.

Pull-up bar is mandatory too. If you have a high door frame throw in some burpee/ pull-up combos.

Explosive moves help keep your strength if you can't go to the gym to lift heavy. A million you can do, especially with kettlebells.


Alcohol on weekends only.
Crank music like you're 17 again.
Get outside.

[drkelly74]

Where there is a will there is a way.

I got sent home to WFH in mid-March of 2020 like many others. My work has a very nice gym, and I always use to workout during my lunch hour. All of the sudden my daily lunch time workout was gone. I have had some cheap Wal-Mart plates and dumbbell handles for years. The first week I was sent home I built a FID bench from scrap wood, and put a pull-up/chin-up bar in my shed. I got creative with lots of different exercises using just dumbbells. I set my alarm for 4:50am and don't make skipping a workout an option. I get up every day and do something. I alternate cardio and weight days. On cardio days I ride my bicycle or walk. I had to buy a headlight for my bicycle. There is almost always a way.

[BiGx5MurF]

IMO, an Airdyne bike is the closest thing to a fitness cheat code there is. You can usually find them cheap on local classifieds, and parts are easily available for repair/maintenance.

I just got mine end of Feb this year. Check the attached screenshot for the major difference it made. Consider I had been lifting consistently before adding it to my routine. Then consider I've only been using it for about 10 minutes a day (HIIT at 30 sec intervals). The first week I struggled to break 5 min of HIIT on it. I've worked my way up to doing 12-13 minutes a day. It's still just as miserable as ever, you don't get used to these machines. Yet, no matter how hard you go on it the night before, you wake up the with no lingering soreness.

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