Why do I attract attention whores?

[user3657]

I seem to attract alot of girls who seem to just want to lead me on..

The most recent one was throwing herself at me. I ask her out to drinks and she couldn't. Fine, she continues to be extra friendly..I mean like x100 now so maybe she was just busy.
We get two feet of snow and I text her to make sure she's arite and that being she just got her own place I offer my assistance if she needs it.

Today she sees me and flips her hair around, shakes her hair like it's a shampoo commerical. It did make me smile. It's clear she loves my attention but what am I missing here?

[user3657]

Does she just want me to come out and say I want to **** her? Like Jesus Christ. If your not interested then stop pretending to be. I'm not chasing her at all so it's.not like I'm putting myself in this position.

[skinnyfat88]

Even if you don't think you're showering them with the attention they crave and aren't chasing/investing into them, the fact that you post about it says otherwise.

Ntn you can do but find productive ways to occupy your time and thus be less invested than you are. Weed out the time wasters and find the ones who will respect your time and put effort into making plans with you.

[NitrogenWidget]

lol.
if a chick shows interest then rejects me i disregard from that point on.
it's like when a dog jumps up on you, you turn your back on them.

except, dogs usually figure it out quicker than attention whores.

[cannon300]

I seem to attract alot of girls who seem to just want to lead me on..

The most recent one was throwing herself at me. I ask her out to drinks and she couldn't. Fine, she continues to be extra friendly..I mean like x100 now so maybe she was just busy.
We get two feet of snow and I text her to make sure she's arite and that being she just got her own place I offer my assistance if she needs it.

Today she sees me and flips her hair around, shakes her hair like it's a shampoo commerical. It did make me smile. It's clear she loves my attention but what am I missing here?

Should have gone NC and stopped giving her attention after she declined your offer. If she was truly interested then she would have agreed or at the very least suggested another time. Best thing to do is just be direct and let girls know your intentions, if they play games don’t waste your time just next them

[user3657]

Even if you don't think you're showering them with the attention they crave and aren't chasing/investing into them, the fact that you post about it says otherwise.

Ntn you can do but find productive ways to occupy your time and thus be less invested than you are. Weed out the time wasters and find the ones who will respect your time and put effort into making plans with you.

I honestly didnt though. I am doing something wrong. This women was even testing me. Maybe I failed her tests or maybe shes just keeping me as an option but i was actually running from her at one point because she was so needy. I honestly think she realized that because she changed her approach on me.

lol.
if a chick shows interest then rejects me i disregard from that point on.
it's like when a dog jumps up on you, you turn your back on them.

except, dogs usually figure it out quicker than attention whores.

Should have gone NC and stopped giving her attention after she declined your offer. If she was truly interested then she would have agreed or at the very least suggested another time. Best thing to do is just be direct and let girls know your intentions, if they play games don’t waste your time just next them

That is my rule to disregard them if they reject me. I understand friendly vs crossing that boundary. However this girl is an acquaintance and after the "i cant tonight i have to get up tomorrow", maybe i misread the signals but she obviously knows i like her because i noticed she was talking to another guy and when she noticed i noticed she runs from that guy and runs up to me. Now lets assume shes being a decent human and is being respectful and nice here. I respect that. However that entire week she really is crossing boundaries with her behavior. This girl is offering to warm up my car for me, make home made soup for me, walk me to my car when she noticed i had a rough day, etc. So why have enough respect for me to run from another male and then continue to lead me on if your not interested?

[cannon300]

Wouldn’t be surprised if you backing off because she was needy caused her low self esteem to question whether you actually liked her. So from that point onwards it was all about protecting her ego and regaining power. Remember, whoever cares the least has the power

To me it just sounds like she enjoys the attention you give her rather than you as a person and she is toying with you to see how much leverage she has over you because she knows you like her. I learned this the hard way

I would go cold on her and see if she initiates. But it’s probably not worth your time and effort. How old is she btw?

[user3657]

Wouldn’t be surprised if you backing off because she was needy caused her low self esteem to question whether you actually liked her. So from that point onwards it was all about protecting her ego and regaining power. Remember, whoever cares the least has the power

To me it just sounds like she enjoys the attention you give her rather than you as a person and she is toying with you to see how much leverage she has over you because she knows you like her. I learned this the hard way

I would go cold on her and see if she initiates. But it’s probably not worth your time and effort. How old is she btw?

I believe she might be 27 or 28. I think you are right. Im going to stick to my original blueprint. Never give a girl the time of day after she rejects you. The problem is my friends seen how she acted towards me and said give it another try shes playing hard to get or was really busy. If she was interested she had time for 1 drink, 20mins? I dont know what you mean by going cold, but she is an acquaintance and im not going to just ignore her but im thinking just cordial and thats it.
The confusing part in this and the reason why I didnt blow her off was that there were genuine positive body language. Her blushing, rubbing her thighs, her voice was soft around me and she was very submissive. I basically said wow i have to try and get that..

I will just go back to like she never existed and move on. i just dont know how to deal with when she wants to talk. Do i just say I have to go or do I talk to her?

[cannon300]

I wouldn’t necessarily straight up ignore, just don’t initiate anything, don’t show her you like her, if she does try talking to you then keep it brief and indifferent. Basically stop giving a fuk about her (harder said than done I know). View it like she blew her chance with you, make her work for your attention. Ask her out again in a week or so if you want to give her the benefit of the doubt. Her answer will tell you all you need to know

[RonaldMcflurry]

Sounds like you are just a nice guy who keeps getting friendzoned. Lol @ "attention whores". You have a lot to learn.

[user3657]

You have a lot to learn.

Thats why im here bro. Why are you saying that? Are you thinking I missed my chance and she sees me as weak?

[user3657]

View it like she blew her chance with you, make her work for your attention.

I will say this works. When she rejected me i took it personally. Then I remembered all the fun times I had with past girls and I know i displayed it in my body language and gave an evil smile like you just ****ed up big time. her body language changed completely to facing right in front of me playing with her hair and her removing her mask. If it wasnt a public setting that was grounds for taking it physical.

[dustcloud1]

Nothing about this indicates she's attention-seeking. Why not show that you're interested or tell her?

[user3657]

Nothing about this indicates she's attention-seeking. Why not show that you're interested or tell her?

.............crickets...........


What more do you want me to do? Beg her?

[JungleJenetics]

You're being too nice. /thread

[user3657]

You're being too nice. /thread

Okay???does this mean be more sexual? make my intentions clearer? Does she want me to just come out and tell her i want to **** her?

[CulturalDecay]

I seem to attract alot of girls who seem to just want to lead me on..

Girls want attention & a mans time the way guys want sex. Stop letting her pimp you out....you're her time & attention ho.

The most recent one was throwing herself at me. I ask her out to drinks and she couldn't. Fine, she continues to be extra friendly..I mean like x100 now so maybe she was just busy.

Ooph, painful to read this. From this sentence alone I know you don't get much female attention, and as a result, are pretty desperate. "Well maybe she was just busy" FOOL, girls don't do CHIT, girls are boring AF, they have no interesting hobbies, they don't make interesting conversation....girls are never "busy" if they want to see YOU. She doesn't want to see YOU - get it?

We get two feet of snow and I text her to make sure she's arite and that being she just got her own place I offer my assistance if she needs it.

......I just don't even.......BETA!!!
Why TF would you be a SIMP for a girl who hasn't done chit for you? Have some self respect FFS. How long did you sit there in your little room thinking about this thottie, anticipating the text, figuring out the right wording, telling yourself "She'll realize I'm a good guy and care about her....then she'll finally touch my pee-pee". This isn't how attraction works.

Today she sees me and flips her hair around, shakes her hair like it's a shampoo commerical. It did make me smile. It's clear she loves my attention but what am I missing here?

Great, so now she knows she's got a beta orbiter. You're willing to help her shovel snow, check up on her, bring her soup, hold her hair while she pukes after getting roofied & gang banged the night before.....and after she ghosts you and treats you as a time ho, all she has to do is flip her hair at you to know you're still her bitch. This is no different that a pimp giving a ho a backhand. Except, you're the one getting pimped out.


I kept this harsh because you need to hear this. Be an F'ing man and have some backbone, values, and accomplishments under your belt. Know who you are, and how people must behave if they want to be in YOUR orbit. Get some chit going on in your own life.

[user3657]

Girls want attention & a mans time the way guys want sex. Stop letting her pimp you out....you're her time & attention ho.


Ooph, painful to read this. From this sentence alone I know you don't get much female attention, and as a result, are pretty desperate. "Well maybe she was just busy" FOOL, girls don't do CHIT, girls are boring AF, they have no interesting hobbies, they don't make interesting conversation....girls are never "busy" if they want to see YOU. She doesn't want to see YOU - get it?


......I just don't even.......BETA!!!
Why TF would you be a SIMP for a girl who hasn't done chit for you? Have some self respect FFS. How long did you sit there in your little room thinking about this thottie, anticipating the text, figuring out the right wording, telling yourself "She'll realize I'm a good guy and care about her....then she'll finally touch my pee-pee". This isn't how attraction works.


Great, so now she knows she's got a beta orbiter. You're willing to help her shovel snow, check up on her, bring her soup, hold her hair while she pukes after getting roofied & gang banged the night before.....and after she ghosts you and treats you as a time ho, all she has to do is flip her hair at you to know you're still her bitch. This is no different that a pimp giving a ho a backhand. Except, you're the one getting pimped out.


I kept this harsh because you need to hear this. Be an F'ing man and have some backbone, values, and accomplishments under your belt. Know who you are, and how people must behave if they want to be in YOUR orbit. Get some chit going on in your own life.

I mean I get it....and no I dont consider it harsh. Normally I drop it if they dont give a follow up day. I dont get alot of attention from woman, but she took attention seeking to a whole new level. I dont know, she was actually doing things for me thats why I didnt consider it attention whoring. It threw me off guard I guess.

I dont get attraction, but at what point cant a man offer help to a woman without being a simp? She was kind to me, doing things for me, offering her help. If that was a guy doing the same thing I would of responded the same way. I mean im not blowing up her phone begging to go out with me or texting her every min. I sent one text to offer my assistance. Should I have not done that?

I do appreciate "Be an F'ing man and have some backbone, values, and accomplishments under your belt. Know who you are, and how people must behave if they want to be in YOUR orbit. Get some chit going on in your own life." Ive been thinking of my social group and work buddies and I feel like I do need to cut the bums out of my life....

[PlayaGonPLay]

all bitches are attention whores what else is new

[NitrogenWidget]

Girls want attention & a mans time the way guys want sex. Stop letting her pimp you out....you're her time & attention ho.


Ooph, painful to read this. From this sentence alone I know you don't get much female attention, and as a result, are pretty desperate. "Well maybe she was just busy" FOOL, girls don't do CHIT, girls are boring AF, they have no interesting hobbies, they don't make interesting conversation....girls are never "busy" if they want to see YOU. She doesn't want to see YOU - get it?


......I just don't even.......BETA!!!
Why TF would you be a SIMP for a girl who hasn't done chit for you? Have some self respect FFS. How long did you sit there in your little room thinking about this thottie, anticipating the text, figuring out the right wording, telling yourself "She'll realize I'm a good guy and care about her....then she'll finally touch my pee-pee". This isn't how attraction works.


Great, so now she knows she's got a beta orbiter. You're willing to help her shovel snow, check up on her, bring her soup, hold her hair while she pukes after getting roofied & gang banged the night before.....and after she ghosts you and treats you as a time ho, all she has to do is flip her hair at you to know you're still her bitch. This is no different that a pimp giving a ho a backhand. Except, you're the one getting pimped out.


I kept this harsh because you need to hear this. Be an F'ing man and have some backbone, values, and accomplishments under your belt. Know who you are, and how people must behave if they want to be in YOUR orbit. Get some chit going on in your own life.

brutal and honest post.
repped.

If a woman is interested in you, they make it shockingly EASY to take them out.

[NitrogenWidget]

I mean I get it....and no I dont consider it harsh. Normally I drop it if they dont give a follow up day. I dont get alot of attention from woman, but she took attention seeking to a whole new level. I dont know, she was actually doing things for me thats why I didnt consider it attention whoring. It threw me off guard I guess.

I dont get attraction, but at what point cant a man offer help to a woman without being a simp? She was kind to me, doing things for me, offering her help. If that was a guy doing the same thing I would of responded the same way. I mean im not blowing up her phone begging to go out with me or texting her every min. I sent one text to offer my assistance. Should I have not done that?

I do appreciate "Be an F'ing man and have some backbone, values, and accomplishments under your belt. Know who you are, and how people must behave if they want to be in YOUR orbit. Get some chit going on in your own life." Ive been thinking of my social group and work buddies and I feel like I do need to cut the bums out of my life....

bro, she could be grooming you to be one of her orbiters.
very few women do chit for people they aren't sweet on.
so since it's clear she isn't interested romantically there is really one other option.

she does things for you that are really no big deal to her because she knows, once she has you neutered and leashed the return will pale in comparison to her initial investment in you.

i've banged women in the past with a whole universe of dudes spending $$$$$ thinking they will get in them sugar walls.
when those women i'm just banging move or need something like their house or car fixed?
they don't usually call me to help, they call their army of chumps who eagerly drop everything and come a running thinking they will finally sex her for this task they do.

HA! the closest they will ever get to her panties is moving her underwear drawer to her new place.

there is a reason i only had fun with them despite some of them wanting more.

[user3657]

bro, she could be grooming you to be one of her orbiters.
very few women do chit for people they aren't sweet on.
so since it's clear she isn't interested romantically there is really one other option.

she does things for you that are really no big deal to her because she knows, once she has you neutered and leashed the return will pale in comparison to her initial investment in you.

i've banged women in the past with a whole universe of dudes spending $$$$$ thinking they will get in them sugar walls.
when those women i'm just banging move?
they don't call me to help, they call their army of chumps who eagerly drop everything to move her chit from one house to another.
the closest they will ever get to her panties is moving her underwear drawer.

there is a reason i only had fun with them despite some of them wanting more.

haha i love this. I know you are right. And ive been on the otherside, where im ****ing her and her boyfriend is doing all the work at home. The problem is I just dont know how to do that 100%. At this point it is clear she is not interested romantically. But how exactly do you do that without trying? At first I thought this was a trap, but she was literally knocking people over to see me and my boy said dude she is expecting you to make a move...thats why I did. And honestly there were also some tests on her part I picked up on so I felt it was a genuine interest. Attention whores dont test, they just keep going and going and getting all the attention you will give them. Also this girl was generally so submissive around me. Thats why this whole thing is confusing to me. I have plenty of attention whores at work, we flirt, say we want each other to buy the newest phones, she begs me to take her out to dinner 10x a day, and its just fun and games. This girl threw me for a loop.

So what to do now? completely ignore? or be cordial? in all honestly my time is valuable and I dont like giving it away so i should prob just be cordial and say i have work to finish and walk away. I also dont want to burn down any bridges though. shes a chill chick.

[NitrogenWidget]

haha i love this. I know you are right. And ive been on the otherside, where im ****ing her and her boyfriend is doing all the work at home. The problem is I just dont know how to do that 100%. At this point it is clear she is not interested romantically. But how exactly do you do that without trying? At first I thought this was a trap, but she was literally knocking people over to see me and my boy said dude she is expecting you to make a move...thats why I did. And honestly there were also some tests on her part I picked up on so I felt it was a genuine interest. Attention whores dont test, they just keep going and going and getting all the attention you will give them. Also this girl was generally so submissive around me. Thats why this whole thing is confusing to me. I have plenty of attention whores at work, we flirt, say we want each other to buy the newest phones, she begs me to take her out to dinner 10x a day, and its just fun and games. This girl threw me for a loop.

So what to do now? completely ignore? or be cordial? in all honestly my time is valuable and I dont like giving it away so i should prob just be cordial and say i have work to finish and walk away. I also dont want to burn down any bridges though. shes a chill chick.

I don't know what you should do.
i've never put myself in this situation.
i don't try to date women i have to work with daily.

I think you are fooked and may end up on blast at work no matter what you do now.

[user3657]

I don't know what you should do.
i've never put myself in this situation.
i don't try to date women i have to work with daily.

I think you are fooked and may end up on blast at work no matter what you do now.

arite lol. I dont really care to be honest. Id rather take the risk then always wonder what if. Sometimes it works out, at a prior job I was banging the cleaning ladies 18 year old daughter all over the office..lawyers office, conference room, etc etc. Everyone knew and life was good. One of the directors pulled me aside one day and gave me props like dude I always fantasized about what you are doing lol.

I think ill be arite. Its clear shes loving every once of it and prob makes her feel good that someone desires her. She obviously doesn't think its creepy and she fancies it. In all honestly though I too am loving it, because i got back on some dating apps this week and have the confidence to make some dates..She makes me feel desired so it goes both ways...

life is good.

[iputyouatapoint]

I seem to attract alot of girls who seem to just want to lead me on..

The most recent one was throwing herself at me. I ask her out to drinks and she couldn't. Fine, she continues to be extra friendly..I mean like x100 now so maybe she was just busy.
We get two feet of snow and I text her to make sure she's arite and that being she just got her own place I offer my assistance if she needs it.

Today she sees me and flips her hair around, shakes her hair like it's a shampoo commerical. It did make me smile. It's clear she loves my attention but what am I missing here?

Idk why do I let people touch me.

[Romancoholic]

it depends where you look the girls at.

if it's in a shady bar or dance clubs...

go to a library or cosplay gathering and see the difference lol

[iputyouatapoint]

I seem to attract alot of girls who seem to just want to lead me on..

The most recent one was throwing herself at me. I ask her out to drinks and she couldn't. Fine, she continues to be extra friendly..I mean like x100 now so maybe she was just busy.
We get two feet of snow and I text her to make sure she's arite and that being she just got her own place I offer my assistance if she needs it.

Today she sees me and flips her hair around, shakes her hair like it's a shampoo commerical. It did make me smile. It's clear she loves my attention but what am I missing here?

Idk user