Give me your most brutal advice (red pill? black pill?) on how to find good men, misc

[anonymous]

Cliffs

Age: P-Wally would be disgust
Sloot levels: 5 relationships: longest is 4 years; engaged once but called off wedding because guy was a serial cheater and liar; only really loved 2 people; do not do casual sex
Attractiveness: In decent shape; average facial attractiveness; well-educated; have a decent job
Flaws: LDAR tendencies (have not left house in 8 months); do not want kids ever; do not want marriage either; neurotic about cleaning; can be overly sentimental but also detached; some trust issues...obviously others that I am not self aware about
General facts: Economically liberal; slightly socially conservative; would call myself a social democrat who appreciates certain aspects of dictatorship and communism; African
Goals: To be happy; maybe publish a book or two before I die
Hobbies: Reading and writing and day dreaming

Questions:

How do I find good guys? How to know if a guy is interested? How to show interest myself? What can I do to improve? Should I just ldar for life?

[justgenetics]

Move to china so you can admire their communist dictatorship ways

[hoganrulz]

I'm right here bb

[janglingjack]

If you're not going to sloot it up on apps then you gotta find some social hobbies, something chit like a hiking club idk

Also, pm better pics

[propreffered7]

seems like you'd just need to go places you think the guys you want would be. i mean.. idk if thats 100% the answer, but it seems like it be more likely to lead you there

[TypeNirvash]

Here's a piece of advice

Go outside

/thread

[BigDaddy324]

Come in my van bb and I'll tell u my advice

[Muzzlrpress]

Missed your black ass OP.

It's gonna be hard as fuk, and probably even harder since you're in Africa, to find a GOOD dude who doesn't eventually want kids with a woman he loves. Women may have the biological clock and all, but guys really do want kids too. Nothing you can really do there since you've sworn off kids.

Do you put yourself in positions to find single guys? Do you ever make the first move?

[ShakeBrah]

Age: P-Wally would be disgust
Attractiveness: In decent shape; average facial attractiveness; well-educated; have a decent job
Flaws: LDAR tendencies (have not left house in 8 months); do not want kids ever; do not want marriage either; neurotic about cleaning; can be overly sentimental but also detached; some trust issues...obviously others that I am not self aware about
General facts: Economically liberal; slightly socially conservative; would call myself a social democrat who appreciates certain aspects of dictatorship and communism; African

lol OP you can't be serious. WTF do you even bring to the table other than a vagina to smash?

You've already disqualified yourself from any guy that doesn't already have kids. But you also don't want to marry, so there goes almost any serious man.
Also LOL at economically liberal, but socially conservative. Ass-backward as hell.

[spacecowb0y]

Location: Africa

Take down SARS and men will be lining up to go on a date with you

[ShakeBrah]

....the issues you are oblivious about is not being in tune with your femininity at all, look at your post and think to yourself "would a masculine man want someone that prioritizes what i've prioritized in my posts?"

you listed exactly zero feminine qualities except perhaps cleaning but you put that even in a masculine way

this 100%

[anonymous]

Missed your black ass OP.

It's gonna be hard as fuk, and probably even harder since you're in Africa, to find a GOOD dude who doesn't eventually want kids with a woman he loves. Women may have the biological clock and all, but guys really do want kids too. Nothing you can really do there since you've sworn off kids.

Do you put yourself in positions to find single guys? Do you ever make the first move?

Hey New Black Jesus . It's been a while. I am on your continent for two years but so far, American cultures seems very very different from mine and I am not sure I could have a successful relationship with such a divide so I just sort of figured, I'd wait until I was somewhere else but while I am waiting, maybe start improving myself?

No, I don't put myself in those positions, I don't think. I don't know what those positions are, that's why I am asking brutal miscers because in real life, people sugar coat everything. If I met someone I liked, I think I would make the first move...I think.

[Holyfenix]

Cliffs


Flaws: LDAR tendencies (have not left house in 8 months); do not want kids ever; do not want marriage either; neurotic about cleaning; can be overly sentimental but also detached; some trust issues...obviously others that I am not self aware about
General facts: Economically liberal; slightly socially conservative; would call myself a social democrat who appreciates certain aspects of dictatorship and communism; African


Questions:

How do I find good guys? How to know if a guy is interested? How to show interest myself? What can I do to improve? Should I just ldar for life?

Lol you are never going to find a good guy with those massive flaws. Yes to the bold. How do you feel about cats? No I'm not trolling either, I'm ded srs.

[jasonspezza]

the bitter truth it this.

there aren't that many good guys out there (its primarily soy boys). you might not have what it takes to lock one down. you might have to settle for a poorcel/fatcel/uglycel/manlet/soyboy or any combination of the above. or just LDAR alone at home, which you seem to already be doing.

[George2100]

I think some of your viewpoints may change if you find a man that you’re into. You like reading, writing, and daydreaming. You are clearly a homebody. Nothing wrong with that. I sort of am too. Just find someone that wants to LDAR with you lol. Plenty of people like that out there! No idea about Africa though. My uncle is from Ghana, but he never spoke about his intimate relationships there. He also never got married, so maybe it’s tougher to find someone there?

[anonymous]

lol OP you can't be serious. WTF do you even bring to the table other than a vagina to smash?

You've already disqualified yourself from any guy that doesn't already have kids. But you also don't want to marry, so there goes almost any serious man.
Also LOL at economically liberal, but socially conservative. Ass-backward as hell.

Not wanting marriage doesn't mean I don't want long term companionship; I simply do not want to subscribe to the institution, that's all.

....the issues you are oblivious about is not being in tune with your femininity at all, look at your post and think to yourself "would a masculine man want someone that prioritizes what i've prioritized in my posts?"

you listed exactly zero feminine qualities except perhaps cleaning but you put that even in a masculine way and liking a clean place is not really "gender specific" either so i'm really trying to be nice here

I am a good cook and I like cooking. When I like someone, I prioritize their happiness and taking care of them becomes as important to me as my own happiness. I think I am easy to talk to and I have a lot of love to give. I am loyal and honest. Those are my good qualities.

[Brosnbroccoli]

....the issues you are oblivious about is not being in tune with your femininity at all, look at your post and think to yourself "would a masculine man want someone that prioritizes what i've prioritized in my posts?"

you listed exactly zero feminine qualities except perhaps cleaning but you put that even in a masculine way and liking a clean place is not really "gender specific" either so i'm really trying to be nice here

This.

But I believe almost everyone can find love, if they put themselves out there.
It will be more difficult for you than others, judging by your post. No kids alone is probably a dealbreaker for 90% of ‘good men’.

[RICHSTRONG]

Does this rag smell like chloroform?

[Muzzlrpress]

Hey New Black Jesus . It's been a while. I am on your continent for two years but so far, American cultures seems very very different from mine and I am not sure I could have a successful relationship with such a divide so I just sort of figured, I'd wait until I was somewhere else but while I am waiting, maybe start improving myself?

No, I don't put myself in those positions, I don't think. I don't know what those positions are, that's why I am asking brutal miscers because in real life, people sugar coat everything. If I met someone I liked, I think I would make the first move...I think.

If you're in the states, dudes have got to be trying to holla. Like others said, you just gotta get out of the damn house. Literally anywhere.

How to tell if a guy is interested?

If a dude is talking to you for more than 30 seconds and it's not mandatory (i.e. work or business related), he's interested. Guys don't tend to seek women out for friendship because you guys are lame most of the time.

Do you have resting bitch face? Guys are intimidated by it and may not approach because of it.

This.

But I believe almost everyone can find love, if they put themselves out there.
It will be more difficult for you than others, judging by your post. No kids alone is probably a dealbreaker for 90% of ‘good men’.

If say 95 at least. Horrible men want kids. Good men want to pass on everything the have.

[xvicknumber7x]

lmfao are you kidding me

okay first off there is nothing about the actual "you" in the OP which tells me youre probably a cookie cutter broad you can find on any dating app

also if you think you're in average shape, you're in bad shape. lose some weight because it's really likely you need to and you look worse than you think you do.

wtf do you even do for fun? at some points i dont care if youre "nice" or a "good person" sometimes i just wanna laugh and crack jokes and rip on my girl and have her rip on me back over some beers

[propreffered7]

Not wanting marriage doesn't mean I don't want long term companionship; I simply do not want to subscribe to the institution, that's all.



I am a good cook and I like cooking. When I like someone, I prioritize their happiness and taking care of them becomes as important to me as my own happiness. I think I am easy to talk to and I have a lot of love to give. I am loyal and honest. Those are my good qualities.

i dont see another solution beyond going to a place you know the guys you like are at. or approaching guys

i know female.. don't want to think you're not pretty or desperate or don't have options.. but what is the alternative? wait for guys to come to you?

i would think that if you place yourself in the vicinity of a lot of dudes you'd get hit on. meaning you don't have to actually approach. just be there

[ShakeBrah]

Not wanting marriage doesn't mean I don't want long term companionship; I simply do not want to subscribe to the institution, that's all.



I am a good cook and I like cooking. When I like someone, I prioritize their happiness and taking care of them becomes as important to me as my own happiness. I think I am easy to talk to and I have a lot of love to give. I am loyal and honest. Those are my good qualities.

Don't ever bring up your negative qualities unless specifically asked. You're trying to promote yourself. As Rajc said, focus on the qualities men look for, and highlight the ones that you possess. It's not that hard.

[anonymous]

If you're in the states, dudes have got to be trying to holla. Like others said, you just gotta get out of the damn house. Literally anywhere.

How to tell if a guy is interested?

If a dude is talking to you for more than 30 seconds and it's not mandatory (i.e. work or business related), he's interested. Guys don't tend to seek women out for friendship because you guys are lame most of the time.

Do you have resting bitch face? Guys are intimidated by it and may not approach because of it.


If say 95 at least. Horrible men want kids. Good men want to pass on everything the have.

Well, I have some social anxiety so in public, I am always trying to get in and get out so to speak. Guys at work talk to me but I always think they are just being friendly, and not more. Once in the supermarket, my friends told me guys were checking me out, but I didn't see it. I don't know how to tell if it's just friendly interest or interest interest.

lmfao are you kidding me

okay first off there is nothing about the actual "you" in the OP which tells me youre probably a cookie cutter broad you can find on any dating app

also if you think you're in average shape, you're in bad shape. lose some weight because it's really likely you need to and you look worse than you think you do.

wtf do you even do for fun? at some points i dont care if youre "nice" or a "good person" sometimes i just wanna laugh and crack jokes and rip on my girl and have her rip on me back over some beers

I am in decent shape: 5'7ish and 128lbs. I could use more exercise, sure, but I don't think I am overweight.

Fun for me is spending quality time with friends and family talking about life, etc. As well as the hobbies I mentioned.

[anonymous]

you dont move eloquently or gracefully, i can easily read that out of here.. if you are in a rush all the time for no reason you will look unapproachable and your body language will be off putting, so much you don't even notice it yourself
in other words: you're look like an autistic incel

This may be true. One of my male colleagues who's my friend said I look like a nun because I always wear parachute dresses. Not always but a lot of the time. They are comfortable.

[ShakeBrah]

in other words: you're look like an autistic incel

lol fukkk on spread

[Muzzlrpress]

Well, I have some social anxiety so in public, I am always trying to get in and get out so to speak. Guys at work talk to me but I always think they are just being friendly, and not more. Once in the supermarket, my friends told me guys were checking me out, but I didn't see it. I don't know how to tell if it's just friendly interest or interest interest.



I am in decent shape: 5'7ish and 128lbs. I could use more exercise, sure, but I don't think I am overweight.

Fun for me is spending quality time with friends and family talking about life, etc. As well as the hobbies I mentioned.

The guys at work, if they go out of their way to talk to you, they're very likely interested and hoping for a sign to continue. If you're interested in any of them, you gotta conquer your fear and go for it.

Like another poster said, hang around somewhere with a bunch of dudes and they WILL approach. Just remember to make yourself approachable. Smile and dress well. That's it. The anxiety is the main thing fukking you over. Just gotta deal with the fear and jump in the deep end.

Do any of your girlfriends invite you out? If so, stop turning them down. You're only messing with your own long term happiness.

Raj is also right. You look autism.

[OptimusTrajan]

You don’t deserve a quality guy. Just buy a bunch of cats and cut to the chase.

[Ken-O]

Whats your actual age tho

[cjayzzz]

Haven't left the house in 8 months and liberal...... do you even brain

[anonymous]

this is much better, how do you present yourself.. do you dress cute and flattering? in general - if a man can wear that exact piece then it is not feminine but neutral at best... fingernails done? do you maintain yourself nicely? ideally you would want to be a bit above the average in your country.. do you move eloquently, do you not talk over a man? do you say stuff like thank you please blablabla, do you think your "decent job and good money" makes you more valuable in the dating market? (it doesnt) do you accept a mans lead? are you a "warm place to land on" (not meaning sex here obviously)
when out and about do you look approachable? meaning no headphones in, actually make eye contact, no off-putting body language

when you talk to men, is your first thought about how they want to "take advantage of you?" or do you have a healthy mindset? your inside colors your outside

you don't have to answer me, you can answer it for yourself

Thanks for all of these.

do you dress cute and flattering? Mostly no.
in general - if a man can wear that exact piece then it is not feminine but neutral at best... fingernails done? Never done my nails.
do you maintain yourself nicely? I am clean and decently dressed.
do you move eloquently. I can't see myself moving.
do you not talk over a man? I don't talk over anybody.
do you say stuff like thank you please blablabla. Yes.
do you think your "decent job and good money" makes you more valuable in the dating market? (it doesnt) Yes, I thought so.
Do you accept a mans lead? If he makes sense, yeah. If not, no.
are you a "warm place to land on" - I don't know.
when out and about do you look approachable? meaning no headphones in, actually make eye contact, no off-putting body language. I always have headphones in. I make eye contact when I can.

when you talk to men, is your first thought about how they want to "take advantage of you?" or do you have a healthy mindset? your inside colors your outside No, I don't think people are trying to take advantage of me.