Matches have pretty much died ³

[twovalvekid]

Because you're a Chad!

I mean yeah. But i also know what kills me is my pics. I don't get many pics to use really. The group of friends never really takes them so i have to work with what i got. My "profile" pic is me and an older married friend who is sorta like my mom. Not sheriff i should use it. I get completely different reactions in person, and outside of dating apps have no real issues. Wondered why, had someone actually tell me meeting me once how i was one of the few people she went out with who actually looked *better* in person.

[TBO1313]

I mean yeah. But i also know what kills me is my pics. I don't get many pics to use really. The group of friends never really takes them so i have to work with what i got. My "profile" pic is me and an older married friend who is sorta like my mom. Not sheriff i should use it. I get completely different reactions in person, and outside of dating apps have no real issues. Wondered why, had someone actually tell me meeting me once how i was one of the few people she went out with who actually looked *better* in person.

Probably because you have good posture and a good presence. I hate pics of myself cause I never feel like they look like me, could be my poverty camera though. I'm completely fine with videos except when I hear myself talk. I sound like if Ice Cube was raised by hillbillys and it makes me cringe every time

[Mr Beer]

I sound like if Ice Cube was raised by hillbillys and it makes me cringe every time

I think everyone hates their own voice when recorded and played back to them.

[TBO1313]

I think everyone hates their own voice when recorded and played back to them.

I think this is especially true for people with regional accents. When I hear myself I don't really have much of an accent but when I hear it played back its magnified like 100 times.

[twovalvekid]

Probably because you have good posture and a good presence. I hate pics of myself cause I never feel like they look like me, could be my poverty camera though. I'm completely fine with videos except when I hear myself talk. I sound like if Ice Cube was raised by hillbillys and it makes me cringe every time

Yeah i definitely am an "in person" kinda guy. No issues if i get someone out away from a damn phone.

[brightbrah]

I think this is especially true for people with regional accents. When I hear myself I don't really have much of an accent but when I hear it played back its magnified like 100 times.

lol, reminds me of a time I met this tinder girl from down south and the first thing she said upon hearing my voice is that I "sound country" (there's a hint of Appalachia in my voice)

I guess she had a misconception that everyone from up north sounds the same.

[Mr Beer]

lol, reminds me of a time I met this tinder girl from down south and the first thing she said upon hearing my voice is that I "sound country" (there's a hint of Appalachia in my voice)

I guess she had a misconception that everyone from up north sounds the same.

BRB everyone north of the Mason Dixon is from Brooklyn.

[TBO1313]

lol, reminds me of a time I met this tinder girl from down south and the first thing she said upon hearing my voice is that I "sound country" (there's a hint of Appalachia in my voice)

I guess she had a misconception that everyone from up north sounds the same.

I knew a guy from rural southern Ohio in college. He dressed ghetto but had a country accent and country hobbies like hunting and fishing. He was a pretty cool cat once you got to know him. I think he ended up moving up to Chatanooga.

A lot of it is urban vs rural too. You can spot all the people who come from the biggest city in my state because they all have a different accent. Northerners think they sound country and southerners think they sound like yankees.

[Luc1fer]

I get so lazy with the app once I've met one girl and it looks like we'll continue dating.

I don't even want to message, or set up new dates etc. I have multiple girls I can potentially meet right now, but cba. And it isn't because I'm attached, I'm not at all.

I guess I'm a 1 girl kinda guy, or lazy with these apps. I know people say to date multiple women because she is, but fuk that's so much effort. Even keeping track of each girl and what I've said to her - I mix them up.

[Legz422]

I get so lazy with the app once I've met one girl and it looks like we'll continue dating.

I don't even want to message, or set up new dates etc. I have multiple girls I can potentially meet right now, but cba. And it isn't because I'm attached, I'm not at all.

I guess I'm a 1 girl kinda guy, or lazy with these apps. I know people say to date multiple women because she is, but fuk that's so much effort. Even keeping track of each girl and what I've said to her - I mix them up.

I've always been that way. One guy at a time. When I was online dating if there was someone I felt like we connected through messaging/texting more so than the other guys, I'd stop messaging with the others until we met and saw if we had any connection IRL. If we did, then I just went with that and would get off the app while we dated.

[Luc1fer]

I've always been that way. One guy at a time. When I was online dating if there was someone I felt like we connected through messaging/texting more so than the other guys, I'd stop messaging with the others until we met and saw if we had any connection IRL. If we did, then I just went with that and would get off the app while we dated.

You know what's hilarious. One of my ex'es (very slutty) friends was complaining about how difficult it is to find a bf, because she and everyone else is constantly meeting new people and jumping around.

I was thinking... you just answered your own question. Stop being the village bicycle and actually give one a chance, even with his flaws and yours.

Imagine complaining about something, yet being an active participant in doing the thing that causes it.

[Legz422]

You know what's hilarious. One of my ex'es (very slutty) friends was complaining about how difficult it is to find a bf, because she and everyone else is constantly meeting new people and jumping around.

I was thinking... you just answered your own question. Stop being the village bicycle and actually give one a chance, even with his flaws and yours.

Imagine complaining about something, yet being an active participant in doing the thing that causes it.

Yeah, I see what you're saying. But my way didn't get me anywhere, either, cause here I am still single. lol It really doesn't pay to be an honest upfront person nowadays.

[Mr Beer]

^

Yeah but having integrity isn't something that you necessarily get rewarded for, you do it for the sake of being a decent person.

[Luc1fer]

Yeah, I see what you're saying. But my way didn't get me anywhere, either, cause here I am still single. lol It really doesn't pay to be an honest upfront person nowadays.

I don't think that's the right conclusion to draw. Her point is that she's perpetually single.

^

Yeah but having integrity isn't something that you necessarily get rewarded for, you do it for the sake of being a decent person.

Agree, but this isn't an integrity thing, unless there's misleading or deception. That's why I push them into a clear situation of integrity, by setting clear boundaries on sexual exclusivity, and agreeing to it.

[skinnyfat88]

I get so lazy with the app once I've met one girl and it looks like we'll continue dating.

I don't even want to message, or set up new dates etc. I have multiple girls I can potentially meet right now, but cba. And it isn't because I'm attached, I'm not at all.

I guess I'm a 1 girl kinda guy, or lazy with these apps. I know people say to date multiple women because she is, but fuk that's so much effort. Even keeping track of each girl and what I've said to her - I mix them up.

I've forced myself to "keep my options open" at times and schedule dates w/ multiple girls as a way to not over-invest and what not in the past but once you know you'd have no problem finding another woman if things went south with the current one I agree you really don't "need" to despite what people say.

[legbroke]

In to continue vicariously dating through you people

[twovalvekid]

In to continue vicariously dating through you people

Stronk username to my leg a year ago ratio.

[legbroke]

Stronk username to my leg a year ago ratio.

Oof, sorry to hear that. Hope you're doing better.

Chose it myself becaue I had pretty bad knee tendonitis a year ago, though I somehow still have it

[Legz422]

^

Yeah but having integrity isn't something that you necessarily get rewarded for, you do it for the sake of being a decent person.

Dis true. I can't be any other way.

I don't think that's the right conclusion to draw. Her point is that she's perpetually single.

Right, but so am I. lol

Agree, but this isn't an integrity thing, unless there's misleading or deception. That's why I push them into a clear situation of integrity, by setting clear boundaries on sexual exclusivity, and agreeing to it.

Yep, me too.

[Luc1fer]

Right, but so am I. lol

but my point was just that her antics aren't finding her anyone either.

You were married and have kids, right?

[Legz422]

but my point was just that her antics aren't finding her anyone either.

You were married and have kids, right?

Yep. Married for 15 years and have 1 kid.

So I have a question for all of you. What do you think of someone requesting that you both get tested before having sex? Would you feel insulted that someone asked? I'm petrified of STDs and the fact you can have something and be asymptomatic terrifies me. I just want to make sure I'm safe and I'm completely willing to get tested myself.

[FemaleWarriorxo]

Yep. Married for 15 years and have 1 kid.

So I have a question for all of you. What do you think of someone requesting that you both get tested before having sex? Would you feel insulted that someone asked? I'm petrified of STDs and the fact you can have something and be asymptomatic terrifies me. I just want to make sure I'm safe and I'm completely willing to get tested myself.

I’ve had so many guys get offended over this and I never understood why.

“How would you like if I told you to get tested even though you don’t have any sexual partners?”

Lmaooo

[Legz422]

I’ve had so many guys get offended over this and I never understood why.

“How would you like if I told you to get tested even though you don’t have any sexual partners?”

Lmaooo

I mean, I guess I understand the offense, they think you're saying they are lying or something. But for me it's more about worrying about those rare cases where someone has HSV2 and are asymptomatic. Like, wouldn't you want to know? I would.

[TBO1313]

I’ve had so many guys get offended over this and I never understood why.

“How would you like if I told you to get tested even though you don’t have any sexual partners?”

Lmaooo

Kinda kills the mood a little bit. Could be an out of sight out of mind situation where if you're asymptomatic you'd rather not know

[Legz422]

Kinda kills the mood a little bit. Could be an out of sight out of mind situation where if you're asymptomatic you'd rather not know

Well I wouldn't ask right as we're about to have sex. lol Also don't get not wanting to know. Then you'd be going around infecting people.

[MediocreGains]

Yep. Married for 15 years and have 1 kid.

So I have a question for all of you. What do you think of someone requesting that you both get tested before having sex? Would you feel insulted that someone asked? I'm petrified of STDs and the fact you can have something and be asymptomatic terrifies me. I just want to make sure I'm safe and I'm completely willing to get tested myself.

I wouldn't be offended, but it does take the spontaneity out of it. I used to get tested somewhat regularly anyways.

[Luc1fer]

Yep. Married for 15 years and have 1 kid.

So I have a question for all of you. What do you think of someone requesting that you both get tested before having sex? Would you feel insulted that someone asked? I'm petrified of STDs and the fact you can have something and be asymptomatic terrifies me. I just want to make sure I'm safe and I'm completely willing to get tested myself.

So you have had success imo. 15 years married... more than most.

To answer your question: I would be glad to hear it, and it would increase my attraction towards her.

As with most things in dating, you actually want to weed out those types who would reject certain propositions.

[Legz422]

I wouldn't be offended, but it does take the spontaneity out of it. I used to get tested somewhat regularly anyways.

Well, like I said, I would ask in advance. getting tested regularly is good, but if it hasn't been since the last person you were with it could mean nothing.

So you have had success imo. 15 years married... more than most.

To answer your question: I would be glad to hear it, and it would increase my attraction towards her.

Yes. Together 17 years total. Son is a good kid and in college now. I do feel good about that.

Good to know. I would feel the same way if someone asked me to get tested first.

[skinnyfat88]

I’ve had so many guys get offended over this and I never understood why.

“How would you like if I told you to get tested even though you don’t have any sexual partners?”

Lmaooo

It's tough to time it right. Don't want to make them get tested then get cold feet about hooking up but don't wanna wait too long and then have to wait longer than you want to when you're both ready.

Totally within your right and kind of a way to weed out people who have no interest in monogamy.

[FemaleWarriorxo]

It's tough to time it right. Don't want to make them get tested then get cold feet about hooking up but don't wanna wait too long and then have to wait longer than you want to when you're both ready.

Totally within your right and kind of a way to weed out people who have no interest in monogamy.

I understand what you mean. That’s why I always tell them up front while getting to know one another. It’s one of the best ways to weed out some people. Decent amount of men don’t take it serious until they try something and get a big ol’ no.

I mean, I guess I understand the offense, they think you're saying they are lying or something. But for me it's more about worrying about those rare cases where someone has HSV2 and are asymptomatic. Like, wouldn't you want to know? I would.

Eh. Some of tried to say it’s offensive to ask them to but I just shrug. Caring about your health isn’t offensive. It can be annoying but not offensive. Then again I don’t mind offending people. I’d rather be up front and get things out of the way. People are way too sensitive but I have been told I can be “cold”. Can’t help it lol

Also every guy that got offended with me asking got an “lol” and a NC.

Kinda kills the mood a little bit. Could be an out of sight out of mind situation where if you're asymptomatic you'd rather not know

Get that too but like I told skinny. I bring it up before anything happens.

I guess I’m different on the second part. I want to know every little detail about my health lol
However that’s probably due to me going slightly “chaotic” when losing weight. Hard to find a respectable middle ground rn