How can I talk to the girl I’m seeing about us deleting our tinders?

[Dirtylocks]

I know it feels great, but girls get to do that every other day.
I had a good time with a girl at the beach a few weeks ago and had one of those "perfect" romantic dates that was similar to yours.
She said after how she likes me and wants to see me again.

lets just say she didnt. she ghostd

hope it can work out though

Damn that hit an old wound.

I remember figuring this out at about age 23.

[LordMU]

Lol once again, why would she go through all the effort of seeing me 4 times (gonna be 5 on tuesday) only to play me? It takes her almost an hour and a half and even more to meet up with me. Why go through all the effort of cuddling, kissing like crazy and starring into my eyes like a madman if she was seeing other dudes? Legit makes zero sense. Why would she wear a skirt when I told her I like them? Why would she open up emotionally? She’s split bills with me and is always eager to meet me. We have late video calls that can last up to an hour and a half almost every night. Where would she possibly make time for other dudes?

Your view of woman as a whole is messed up because of the misc and your experience with women. Not all women are sloots, not all women have BPD and not all women are out there to use you. Normal women just like normal men want a love filled relationship. They wanna build dreams, have kids, and have someone they can count on. You attract what you want in life. If you’re a chitty person you’ll attract a chitty girl.

Every time I’ve followed the misc’s advice when it came to women I’ve ended up becoming a controlling freak with zero trust. Sometimes the misc is right but usually it’s wrong.

mate you sound extremely naive. No one is saying that once you get into a relationship do not pay attention to your woman. It just so happens that in the age of 24/7 social media, simping and endless attention that NOT being controlling and having a chill non-chalant attitude is the way to get the girl in the first place. After that; do as you please.

The only time being truly open-and-honest works is when both parties are mature (>25+) or there is a huge looks discrepancy between the dude and the chick. OP sounds like a young dude so he's almost certainly dating a young chick. They don't respond well to good intentions and honesty.

[Dirtylocks]

Ya I know but obviously I was gonna delete mine as well. We just had such an amazing romantic date yesterday and she’s ticking all boxes
Sex was amazing - best I’ve ever had in my life
She’s smart af and a lawyer
We get along like a house and fire- laughing, flirting and joking around all day
She’s gorgeous
I can tell she’s excited to see me and hang out with me - like she makes a proper effort with her makeup etc for our dates and dresses really cute and feminine

I really wanna just gush all my feelings to her right now but I know I have to try and hold back a little bit longer until her feelings are on the same level. She sent me a message the other day saying she thinks I’m out of her league and she’s nervous that I’m just playing her for sex and I legit couldn’t believe she thinks that because in my head she is way out of my league and I’m so suprised she wants to date me!

Has to be roll bread...someone confirm?

[jasticus]

Not only this, but he's thinking about revealing his feelings to her. Men should never fall in love with a woman 1st. Retard op calls her a 10/10 on date #3 LMAO. As soon as ******* op opens up she'll lose respect. Never knew there could be so many weak *******s on a bodybuilding forum

This. Don’t fo it op. You’re in emotional quick sand.

[Dirtylocks]

Girlfriends don’t exist in 2020. Just your turn bub. That’s why I never make things official with girls I smash more than once or twice even though sometimes they want too.

All the guys I know with girlfriends either get cheated on or are in “open relationships”.

Living in liberal dumpster fire city, I can confirm all girls are in open relationships if at all in relationships.

[multiplemiggs]

The person that cares the least in a relationship is the one that controls it.
Do this and enjoy your leash and collar.

[wd0694820]

mate you sound extremely naive. No one is saying that once you get into a relationship do not pay attention to your woman. It just so happens that in the age of 24/7 social media, simping and endless attention that NOT being controlling and having a chill non-chalant attitude is the way to get the girl in the first place. After that; do as you please.

The only time being truly open-and-honest works is when both parties are mature (>25+) or there is a huge looks discrepancy between the dude and the chick. OP sounds like a young dude so he's almost certainly dating a young chick. They don't respond well to good intentions and honesty.

We’re both 22 and just graduated

[skinnyfat88]

We’re both 22 and just graduated

She’s smart af and a lawyer

She's not a lawyer then - she's going into law school, right?

You know her more than we do so you may know more than us if you think she genuinely wants to be exclusive or not.

My advice would be to do what you want in terms of stopping to talk to other girls or w/e but preoccupy yourself with a lot of other things to keep your mind off if she's doing the same or not. You also need to do this to slow down your attachment so you don't become blinded by your emotions and can still view her with a clear mind.

IMO a lot of quality people naturally become monogamous before the "official talk."

If you do have a serious talk, I wouldn't focus on deleting tinder or using bf/gf labels, I would just want to confirm y'all ain't sleeping with anyone else while you get to know each other and see where this may go.
"Locking her down" with labels and making sure she deletes the apps to soon can come off a bit needy/insecure/controlling.

From my experience though, if a woman doesn't want you sleeping with anyone else she will bring it up one way or another.

[Xgamer791]

Opie is a massive ***gort

[GorillaGlue2]

Thought this was a SANDMAN thread.....

[Hector002]

Quit getting attached to girls so damn easily. Especially ones you meet online or at bars / clubs.

[northernlights7]

3 dates is way too early to start talking about things like telling the other person to get off tinder or whatever. Even if you dated her for months and you both agreed to be exclusive, it's not the sort of thing you want to have to convince someone to do. If a woman doesn't voluntarily decide to stop using dating aps like tinder of her own volition, then don't expect it to go well if you try telling her to. Even if she agreed and followed through, it's just going to build up resentment in her mind down the road.

Honestly, that logic applies to most things about relationships. You never want to be trying to convince someone you're in a relationship with to change their behaviors in a significant way. Because again, even if they listen and change whatever it is you didn't like, it will make them resentful eventually and cause issues in the relationship. If they don't change something like the tinder thing automatically on their own, you can try bringing it up as a mild discussion where you explain your thoughts on it, but without asking them to change it just because you want them to. If you feel like you have to convince someone to change something about their behavior significantly, then you're probably not as good of a fit as you think you are.




Cliffs:

- 3 dates is way too soon to talk about things like that
- Don't waste your time trying to convince someone to change their behavior for a relationship with you

[NMS3]

3 dates is way too early to start talking about things like telling the other person to get off tinder or whatever. Even if you dated her for months and you both agreed to be exclusive, it's not the sort of thing you want to have to convince someone to do. If a woman doesn't voluntarily decide to stop using dating aps like tinder of her own volition, then don't expect it to go well if you try telling her to. Even if she agreed and followed through, it's just going to build up resentment in her mind down the road.

Honestly, that logic applies to most things about relationships. You never want to be trying to convince someone you're in a relationship with to change their behaviors in a significant way. Because again, even if they listen and change whatever it is you didn't like, it will make them resentful eventually and cause issues in the relationship. If they don't change something like the tinder thing automatically on their own, you can try bringing it up as a mild discussion where you explain your thoughts on it, but without asking them to change it just because you want them to. If you feel like you have to convince someone to change something about their behavior significantly, then you're probably not as good of a fit as you think you are.




Cliffs:

- 3 dates is way too soon to talk about things like that
- Don't waste your time trying to convince someone to change their behavior for a relationship with you

This man knows.

[drove12hours]

You need to smash her so good that she begging to be your gf

[ErnieMccracken]

If she's not begging you for a relationship, there is a reason. Probably multiple reasons with 8" dinks srs. Just stop.

[4ea]

op, the best advice i can give you is dont get attached, and certainly dont start acting like a love sick puppy towards her. it will backfire on you.

if you must try to turn this into a relationship then at least wait until you fuk her, then put it to her in a more dominant way. dont say "i like you and want to be exclusive"

it might also be wise to ask her what her intentions are, see if shes even looking for a relationship, or if she just wants to screw around. but again, i emphasize the point, dont act like a sprung sissy towards her, shel go NC on you immediately if you do that.

making a tinder sloot a girlfriend?

what are you doing dude...

this. the vast majority of girls on tinder (possibly 100% of them) are not looking for exclusive relationships.

[CanardMedic]

get down on one knee and put a ring on it.

[whitepaper]

You start by posting her pics here, kunt

[Shysty021]

Misc is acting like hes asking her hand in marriage

Hes just trying to see if they can be a exclusive...i dont think its that hard of a question to bring up with her. At least he will know how much shes into him by her response

[Comply_or_Die]

absolutely DO NOT do this OP

continue to act semi interested, enough she feels wanted but not enough that she'll still want more.

let her bring it up

this. be very careful.

i almost f*cked up my situation by doing exactly the same

https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showt...post1614484311

[Critter5592]

inb4 op listens to the 21 y/o canadian and gets kicked to the curb and enters a deep depression

[Nacured]

Lol, why would someone try to seriously date a person from Tinder/any form of online dating?

[Archangel_Lost]

broseph, recall the old proverb and hoes and housewives

[Critter5592]

Lol he’s gonna listen to the misc, he will act all alpha, he won’t open up emotionally and she will catch onto that fact and then she will meet another dude who triggers an emotional reaction and Op will be abandoned. It’s really that simple. As long as he isn’t professing his love before 3 months Op is fine.

You guys are making him overthink something as simple as asking a girl if she still has tinder after 3 dates. That’s enough dates for them to be cutting off other people. In order to achieve something serious both parties need to invest their energy into one person and one person only. Theres a reason why we keep seeing miscers cry that their relationship failed and its because he tried pulling off some alpha type chit. Girls dont give a fuark if they like you enough. As long as op is having fun, cuddling and making out he’s a golden goose.

There's a happy medium bro. Your defense is arguing against the extreme.