Girlfriend suddenly broke up with me today (LONG)

[steelcherry]

still wearing his clothes. Other than that,

Dude, as a woman I can tell you: if she's still wearing his clothes, he owns her. She might as well be branded and donning a collar.

[Thebunz]

4 months and you write an autobiography... How many times did you eat her angus out serious? I cannot get over 4 months and in this amount of turmoil. You obviously don't body build.

[Bonesbrahh]

Just wanted to update...

Been 5 weeks since the breakup. After a few weeks I talked to my doc and agreed to try Wellbutrin because I was barely feeling better. I was supposed to do counseling too, but they never contacted me. Been on Wellbutrin 2 weeks now and I think it's helping me in some ways. It's an anti-depressant that's supposed to help with energy, motivation, and even sex drive. In those areas I do think it's helped me, but I still think about her, wonder what she's doing, miss her, and feel lonely as hell at times, but at least I'm not crying like a b!tch every day anymore and my need to vent about it has lessened greatly. I also moved into a new place last saturday. It's bittersweet, because what initially sparked me to get a new place was our relationship (but it wasn't all for her--I DID need a new place).

In terms of other girls/dates/sex, I've hooked up with 3 girls (two are pretty far so I'll probably never see them again, the 3rd I'm kinda meh about and I think she's kinda meh about me too), gone on a couple dates with another (who's 5 years older than me and also just went through a breakup lol so we're on the same page), am supposed to have a wine, netflix & chill date with another tomorrow, and am supposed to be grabbing a drink with another saturday. This is all barring flakes, of course. I immediately remembered why I hated dating so much when I got back into it. It just takes SO much work and women are crazy flakey. It's really exhausting swiping, then trying to keep a bunch of conversations going, then trying to set up dates and hoping they don't flake, and of course prioritizing women you think are more interested/less likely to flake. It is legit a second job.

[skinnyfat88]

Just wanted to update...

Been 5 weeks since the breakup. After a few weeks I talked to my doc and agreed to try Wellbutrin because I was barely feeling better. I was supposed to do counseling too, but they never contacted me. Been on Wellbutrin 2 weeks now and I think it's helping me in some ways. It's an anti-depressant that's supposed to help with energy, motivation, and even sex drive. In those areas I do think it's helped me, but I still think about her, wonder what she's doing, miss her, and feel lonely as hell at times, but at least I'm not crying like a b!tch every day anymore and my need to vent about it has lessened greatly. I also moved into a new place last saturday. It's bittersweet, because what initially sparked me to get a new place was our relationship (but it wasn't all for her--I DID need a new place).

In terms of other girls/dates/sex, I've hooked up with 3 girls (two are pretty far so I'll probably never see them again, the 3rd I'm kinda meh about and I think she's kinda meh about me too), gone on a couple dates with another (who's 5 years older than me and also just went through a breakup lol so we're on the same page), am supposed to have a wine, netflix & chill date with another tomorrow, and am supposed to be grabbing a drink with another saturday. This is all barring flakes, of course. I immediately remembered why I hated dating so much when I got back into it. It just takes SO much work and women are crazy flakey. It's really exhausting swiping, then trying to keep a bunch of conversations going, then trying to set up dates and hoping they don't flake, and of course prioritizing women you think are more interested/less likely to flake. It is legit a second job.

Good to hear things are going better.

I think it's good to get back in the game relatively quick to not get stale and ensure the confidence doesn't dwindle but at the same time you're probably not ready yet for a legit relationship again so don't prioritize it too much. Better to spend time with friends/family, gym/looksmax/careermax and doing things you enjoy.

[BullittEV]

Just wanted to update...

Been 5 weeks since the breakup. After a few weeks I talked to my doc and agreed to try Wellbutrin because I was barely feeling better. I was supposed to do counseling too, but they never contacted me. Been on Wellbutrin 2 weeks now and I think it's helping me in some ways. It's an anti-depressant that's supposed to help with energy, motivation, and even sex drive. In those areas I do think it's helped me, but I still think about her, wonder what she's doing, miss her, and feel lonely as hell at times, but at least I'm not crying like a b!tch every day anymore and my need to vent about it has lessened greatly. I also moved into a new place last saturday. It's bittersweet, because what initially sparked me to get a new place was our relationship (but it wasn't all for her--I DID need a new place).

In terms of other girls/dates/sex, I've hooked up with 3 girls (two are pretty far so I'll probably never see them again, the 3rd I'm kinda meh about and I think she's kinda meh about me too), gone on a couple dates with another (who's 5 years older than me and also just went through a breakup lol so we're on the same page), am supposed to have a wine, netflix & chill date with another tomorrow, and am supposed to be grabbing a drink with another saturday. This is all barring flakes, of course. I immediately remembered why I hated dating so much when I got back into it. It just takes SO much work and women are crazy flakey. It's really exhausting swiping, then trying to keep a bunch of conversations going, then trying to set up dates and hoping they don't flake, and of course prioritizing women you think are more interested/less likely to flake. It is legit a second job.

Damn, youre pathetic.

You shouldnt be trying to find another chick- get seriously involved in a few hobbies. Cars, lifting, building chit, etc. All youre doing is cementing your beta-bs with female companionship. People dont realize they need to be happy with themselves first.

[Bonesbrahh]

Damn, youre pathetic.

You shouldnt be trying to find another chick- get seriously involved in a few hobbies. Cars, lifting, building chit, etc. All youre doing is cementing your beta-bs with female companionship. People dont realize they need to be happy with themselves first.

Don't think you have room to be calling anyone pathetic with 11.5k posts on the misc, being on this forum since 2012, and looking like an insecure homo in your AVI. Every time I see your AVI I fantasize about stomping your face into a curb. Fuk outta here f@gg0t.

This.

You're not ready to be dating around and you're still dating women with terrible backgrounds. I.e. dating another girl who is out of a relationship. She's going to get attached very quickly because you're gonna remind her of her ex and you're gonna get hoodwinked into another broken relationship. I totally expect you to make another thread a few months down the road with the aforementioned chick.

Either way best of lucks.

Dawg you're a 21 y/o virgin and you're trying to give people horrible advice. Just stop. You don't know wtf you're talking about and it shows in ALL of your posts.

[BullittEV]

Don't think you have room to be calling anyone pathetic with 11.5k posts on the misc, being on this forum since 2012, and looking like an insecure homo in your AVI. Every time I see your AVI I fantasize about stomping your face into a curb. Fuk outta here f@gg0t.

Let me translate for all the lifting bros:

"Im mad at you for telling me the truth about how pathetic I really am so Im going to mention your post history which is actually below average and then make a completely random comment about your good aesthetics to make myself feel better!"

Sorry bones, you are pathetic. Youre literally going on dates and talking about exes lmao. No girl has ever had that emotional control over me, youre weak.

[Luc1fer]

Just wanted to update...

Been 5 weeks since the breakup. After a few weeks I talked to my doc and agreed to try Wellbutrin because I was barely feeling better. I was supposed to do counseling too, but they never contacted me. Been on Wellbutrin 2 weeks now and I think it's helping me in some ways. It's an anti-depressant that's supposed to help with energy, motivation, and even sex drive. In those areas I do think it's helped me, but I still think about her, wonder what she's doing, miss her, and feel lonely as hell at times, but at least I'm not crying like a b!tch every day anymore and my need to vent about it has lessened greatly. I also moved into a new place last saturday. It's bittersweet, because what initially sparked me to get a new place was our relationship (but it wasn't all for her--I DID need a new place).

In terms of other girls/dates/sex, I've hooked up with 3 girls (two are pretty far so I'll probably never see them again, the 3rd I'm kinda meh about and I think she's kinda meh about me too), gone on a couple dates with another (who's 5 years older than me and also just went through a breakup lol so we're on the same page), am supposed to have a wine, netflix & chill date with another tomorrow, and am supposed to be grabbing a drink with another saturday. This is all barring flakes, of course. I immediately remembered why I hated dating so much when I got back into it. It just takes SO much work and women are crazy flakey. It's really exhausting swiping, then trying to keep a bunch of conversations going, then trying to set up dates and hoping they don't flake, and of course prioritizing women you think are more interested/less likely to flake. It is legit a second job.

So have you learned you have attachment issues, and what are you doing to combat that?

[DBoyDaRealest]

Second of all, all of my advice is based on my limited experience and what I've observed around me. I.e. My fathers relationship with my mother, my uncles relationships with my aunts, and my buddies. Keep running around broken women Op. I truly don't give a fuk if you do. I'm dating a lovely girl and I love myself enough to know that I deserve better than some tramp who's recently left a relationship. You're a bumbling moron and it shows.

Hey man, not here to attack you again, this part just stood out to me. Are girls not allowed to date and break up with someone and date again?

Are they supposed to sit around for some arbitrary time period and not have sex (because I know you'd judge them if they did have sex outside of a relationship), and once they've been single long enough for your arbitrary probation period, they are now no longer tramps?

Think about what you are saying and understand why so many people discount your advice on here. I was getting reps for calling you out in the other thread.

[Mr Beer]

Advice above was spot on. There's no point in trying to build romantic relationships while you are still dealing with the fallout of the last one and yeah you should be doing some work on yourself to be more comfortable without a woman in your life.

[DBoyDaRealest]

They can start dating once they have completely moved on from their past relationship. Op's case justifies my position on this topic. Someone right out of a relationship has not moved on and Op is wasting his time if he is looking for a long term relationship.

There is no set arbitrary time period. Once they are 100% ready they can date again. And yes sex outside of a relationship is a sign of a low value female and male. Sorry not sorry . Healthy relationships are between two loving adults who have low slay counts and who don't date around. The misc is the total opposite of this notion. I will respect your life decisions but I won't support it.

I also got reps from other miscers saying to ignore you and your advice. So I guess we're on a divide here.

I don't disagree with your first paragraph. I think the way you originally worded your earlier post came out harsh. I agree in that it's what doomed OP.

Let's be real though. You admit you tried degenmaxing. No one who ever tried to degenmaxx and succeeded with HBBs ever quit right away like you did. LOL at getting a peck on the cheek at the end of a first date with a 5/10 girl from your study group and calling it degenerate behavior.

It's all a cope, and that's cool. I hope it works out for you, sincerely. I'll respect your life decisions and even support them. It's easier to admit you are not in the top 20 percent and to scale back and date average girls who you can force to be loyal than it is to go out and get rejected or not match any decent girls.

Cheers.

[PxV]

I don't think dating is an issue but definitely don't get into a new relationship. Focus on yourself first. It took me a few months to start dating again and I knew I wasn't ready to commit. You gotta be happy with yourself first.

[Luc1fer]

If you’re comparing girls to your ex, you aren’t really ready to date yet.

[Bonesbrahh]

Let me translate for all the lifting bros:

"Im mad at you for telling me the truth about how pathetic I really am so Im going to mention your post history which is actually below average and then make a completely random comment about your good aesthetics to make myself feel better!"

Sorry bones, you are pathetic. Youre literally going on dates and talking about exes lmao. No girl has ever had that emotional control over me, youre weak.

First of all...

Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: San Diego, California, United States
Age: 34
Posts: 11,434
Rep Power: 69781

On top of that, you're wearing a backwards cap and have two women who are paid to take pics with people as your AVI. LOL. And on a bodybuilding website. If I look up insecure and pathetic in the dictionary there's a 99.999% chance your AVI will be next to both definitions. Even just wearing a cap backwards instantly makes you a f*cking loser, which I'm sure you are.

By the way is that your instagram when I google search your username?

To everyone else who isn't a complete retard, I'm not looking for a long-term relationship lmfao. Just about every girl I talk to I tell I'm just out of something and am not looking to jump into something serious. Plus I've only caught legit feelings for two girls in 11-12 years of dating. The chances of me even contemplating a relationship with someone, especially right now, is extremely slim.

Also this 21 y/o saying that having sex out of a relationship is a sign of a low value person is so unbelievably idiotic and naïve that it's hilarious.

[smashedurgfx10]

And yes sex outside of a relationship is a sign of a low value female and male. Sorry not sorry

its a sign of low value from a girl's perspective. not a guy's.
if you want to GF every girl before you smash them I've got some bad news. really bad news. but maybe deep down you already know that

[Luc1fer]

its a sign of low value from a girl's perspective. not a guy's.

If you mean it generally makes a girl less desirable, but (at minimum) doesn't impact a man's desirability, then I'd agree.

if you want to GF every girl before you smash them I've got some bad news. really bad news. but maybe deep down you already know that

Not really, different types of people have preferences when it comes to mating strategy. r/K selection.

It's evident that the majority of men want the ability to fuk without commitment, but not all.

Probably the most respectful position is a man who can, but opts not to.

[DBoyDaRealest]

If you mean it generally makes a girl less desirable, but (at minimum) doesn't impact a man's desirability, then I'd agree.



Not really, different types of people have preferences when it comes to mating strategy. r/K selection.

It's evident that the majority of men want the ability to fuk without commitment, but not all.

Probably the most respectful position is a man who can, but opts not to.

One of the biggest cope themes of the misc, that goes beyond just this 21 year old kid in the above, is calling out miscers who do actually wheel, as degenerates, or that if we are getting sex outside of a relationship it must be from trash tier girls.

It's been a thing on here since 2012, and it will continue until the end of time.

Some dudes cannot fathom in their head that girls they think as "gf" material, engage in casual sex outside of relationships. It enrages them because they have never came close to any sexual encounters outside of a relationship, or nothing that was regular or from an actual HBB.

[Gurgy]

read the post where OP says made a date with his ex and the guy shes talking to, so that he can show her she can take her time....

Doesn't get any more BETA than this... Pathetic peter

[veggie530]

Don't know about her relationship with her dad.

She did say her sister gave her trust issues because her sister was TOTALLY f*cked up in the past and would do messed up sh!t to her. Didn't say much past that.

She was also being stalked by a guy kinda sorta recently, and ended up seeing him in public a couple weeks ago, which REALLY freaked her out. I came right over when she told me and she literally cried on my shoulder.

She also told me she was drugged at a party in college and raped (woke up in the guys bed with no memory of what happened), which messed her up for a year after, so I'm guessing she has some PTSD.

Also, she wanted me to call her a dirty/stupid little sl*t/wh0re/f*cktoy in bed as well as slap her (lightly). She was also into calling me master sometimes. It seemed a bit extreme, but some people are into it so I did it for her pleasure and didn't think much of it.

We liked a lot of the same stuff, but it didn't seem sketchy. She liked lifting, hiking, and doing different stuff that I liked. That's one of the reasons I felt chemistry with her. But it wasn't in a weird way like she loved EVERYTHING I liked or something.

Her ex is also not in the picture. He moved way far away and she had strong reasons for breaking up with him on top of that.

It's funny, because she WANTED me to spend the night two nights in a row last weekend, which we had never done. Things like that made me think we were getting closer. Then she drops this bomb on me.

There's more, but can you see why/how I was falling for this girl?

First bolded sentence: liar looking for emotional currency so she can excuse away aggressive, manipulative behavior "because I was raped." Once she lays something like this on you, you're suddenly in the red in context to emotional currency.

2nd bolded paragraph, holy lmao bro, she's nuts

you leave out these little bread crumbs that add up to a whole god damn loaf

[BullittEV]

First of all...

Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: San Diego, California, United States
Age: 34
Posts: 11,434
Rep Power: 69781

So that's about 3 posts a day. lmao

On top of that, you're wearing a backwards cap and have two women who are paid to take pics with people as your AVI. LOL. And on a bodybuilding website. If I look up insecure and pathetic in the dictionary there's a 99.999% chance your AVI will be next to both definitions. Even just wearing a cap backwards instantly makes you a f*cking loser, which I'm sure you are.

By the way is that your instagram when I google search your username?

i met those 2 chicks at a concert I was at. Are you really this pathetic? lol

To everyone else who isn't a complete retard, I'm not looking for a long-term relationship lmfao. Just about every girl I talk to I tell I'm just out of something and am not looking to jump into something serious. Plus I've only caught legit feelings for two girls in 11-12 years of dating. The chances of me even contemplating a relationship with someone, especially right now, is extremely slim.

Also this 21 y/o saying that having sex out of a relationship is a sign of a low value person is so unbelievably idiotic and naïve that it's hilarious.

Once again bones, you went too RL about yourself and got embarassed for you actually are. You making up things about chicks in my avi is actually even more cringe, but damn.. you really are the poster autistic miscer, lmao.

[ChaseW]

Updates OP?

[BullittEV]

Lol ok.

It all boils down to your mental state and your overall biological awareness. If you and or a female is sleeping with a person they barely know, you are not exhibiting normal human/mammal behavior. Why? It all comes down to pregnancy and the risk of your sperm getting to the egg. Don't give me the condom crap because it does not change basic human biology. Sex outside of a relationship is not "normal" human behavior. Only someone of low quality and who's not normal would sleep around with people they barely know. Do you see the lioness sleep with every male lion out there? Not really. They choose one partner and stick with him, unless something happens to him that warrants a partner change.
This is why time and time again statistical data shows that people who wait until marriage or people who at least wait a few months until they become official are happier when they finally do the sexor. And this is why time and time again miscers are crying and whining about why they can't find a quality female, how they feel depressed, empty, and feel like they're not getting anywhere in life because they chase sex with females outside of a loving relationship.

All of what im saying is available to you on the internet. You don't need a 21 year old to tell you these things. Or maybe you do, who knows? The amount of times I've dated a girl who regretted sleeping with a dude they barely knew is way too high for it to be an anecdotal evidence. These females are simply low quality and whilst they feel regret, they still partake in this lifestyle because they know they are trash and don't deserve better. Which is why the term nice guys finish last was created. They don't finish last. They finish in a loving relationship with a girl that loves them because they are genuinely nice. You and Op come off as rude and pathetic. But Im sure you already know this.

It took you a month to formulate this response? I think he bested you here bruh.

Your brain: "Herh, he sat there for 3 months thinking of a response the whole time, LOL!"

Cringe.

[MeFromG]

Replying to your original post, your answer to her was good.
But usually it is already a disaster waiting to happen when you met someone right after their breakup.

Better wait, give them a few months, tell them to come back to you later, when they are at least to some degree over it.