I'm reaching out for help

[BecomingApex]

Let me start off by saying this hard. It's hard to feel like I need to reach out and join a community to help myself with my own body. I'm 25 years old male military member who is 5 feet 6 inches, 185 pounds. I was very consistent in working out before and during deployments. However after realizing my significant other was unfaithful, I'm newly divorced and it's been hard to be consistent in the gym for the past 3 months. I'm trying to work on the mental, physical and spiritual side of things. I feel like being able to get my diet and fitness down will truly help with my happiness and overall well being. I've never had a super lean six pack, I've probably stayed around 17 to 20 percent fat. I want to once in my life reach around 10 percent. I'm currently following the PHAT program, only one week in now. While consistent at the gym, I was able to get my squat to 5 reps of 335, neglected doing dead lifts since I failed to stretch enough, 125lb dumbell press. Now I feel so weak, I can still squat 225 by 5 for 3 sets. I need help dialing down the nutrition ,as well as, find the best possible program for me. I'm so tired of feeling down and stuck in my house. So I'm reaching out for help. I want to run a spartan race, I mainly focus on power lifting because it's comfortable. I appreciate whoever reads this and helps me throughout this journey to find myself and to find peace of mind.

[yak93]

Hi! Congrats for getting back on the wagon. I agree that exercise and body transformation will help with confidence. As far at the "best possible" program for you, the best program is one you enjoy, adhere to, and progresses you toward your goals.

If your goal is to run a Spartan Race, then find/create a program that matched your fitness level that will help you achieve that goal. You mentioned you are doing the PHAT program, if you enjoy that, continue it. If you want to stick to powerlifting and transform your body, I would maybe consider looking into powerbuilding programs (PHAT is similar to a powerbuilding program). It combines lifting heavy and bodybuilding accessory exercises.

As far as nutrition, find a way to log your food and stay consistent. The best advice anyone can give you is find something you enjoy and stick with it. Start of at your current fitness level and progress slowly from there.

Just keep pushing and fight through it. You will get to where you want to be, if you keep moving.

[gesten]

Let me start off by saying this hard. It's hard to feel like I need to reach out and join a community to help myself with my own body. I'm 25 years old male military member who is 5 feet 6 inches, 185 pounds. I was very consistent in working out before and during deployments. However after realizing my significant other was unfaithful, I'm newly divorced and it's been hard to be consistent in the gym for the past 3 months. I'm trying to work on the mental, physical and spiritual side of things. I feel like being able to get my diet and fitness down will truly help with my happiness and overall well being. I've never had a super lean six pack, I've probably stayed around 17 to 20 percent fat. I want to once in my life reach around 10 percent. I'm currently following the PHAT program, only one week in now. While consistent at the gym, I was able to get my squat to 5 reps of 335, neglected doing dead lifts since I failed to stretch enough, 125lb dumbell press. Now I feel so weak, I can still squat 225 by 5 for 3 sets. I need help dialing down the nutrition ,as well as, find the best possible program for me. I'm so tired of feeling down and stuck in my house. So I'm reaching out for help. I want to run a spartan race, I mainly focus on power lifting because it's comfortable. I appreciate whoever reads this and helps me throughout this journey to find myself and to find peace of mind.

Married in ur 20s.. not just ur 20s but early 20s lmao.

Never get married

Be happy ur free now lmao. U should be happy af

4 years ago I was in a relationship and I never been more happier ever since I left lmao

125lb press is good

[Tommy W.]

Congrats on getting out of a toxic relationship. That alone is the best thing in the world for health. Now get your diet in check. get on a good training program and never look back.

[BecomingApex]

Hi! Congrats for getting back on the wagon. I agree that exercise and body transformation will help with confidence. As far at the "best possible" program for you, the best program is one you enjoy, adhere to, and progresses you toward your goals.

If your goal is to run a Spartan Race, then find/create a program that matched your fitness level that will help you achieve that goal. You mentioned you are doing the PHAT program, if you enjoy that, continue it. If you want to stick to powerlifting and transform your body, I would maybe consider looking into powerbuilding programs (PHAT is similar to a powerbuilding program). It combines lifting heavy and bodybuilding accessory exercises.

As far as nutrition, find a way to log your food and stay consistent. The best advice anyone can give you is find something you enjoy and stick with it. Start of at your current fitness level and progress slowly from there.

Just keep pushing and fight through it. You will get to where you want to be, if you keep moving.

I appreciate the words of wisdom. It took me a second to really let it sink in that consistency is key here and to make my program into something I can maintain. I try my best to track my foods but I'm really unsure on if I'm getting what I need. Once again, I appreciate the reply, it really allowed me to take a step back and not look so short term with my fitness goal.

[BecomingApex]

Married in ur 20s.. not just ur 20s but early 20s lmao.

Never get married

Be happy ur free now lmao. U should be happy af

4 years ago I was in a relationship and I never been more happier ever since I left lmao

125lb press is good

I can honestly understand where your coming from, I also know that it was probably going to fail one way or the other. I'm trying to find that happiness outside of a relationship now that I'm so new in this area.

[BecomingApex]

Congrats on getting out of a toxic relationship. That alone is the best thing in the world for health. Now get your diet in check. get on a good training program and never look back.

I'm really trying to. I'm finally getting comfortable with being alone now. It's really consistency in the gym since I'm always so busy. I need to decide on how I want my diet to go. I'm really in search of some base like to start from for it.

[Tommy W.]

I'm really trying to. I'm finally getting comfortable with being alone now. It's really consistency in the gym since I'm always so busy. I need to decide on how I want my diet to go. I'm really in search of some base like to start from for it.

Read the stickies in the Nutrition section that's all you need

[yak93]

I appreciate the words of wisdom. It took me a second to really let it sink in that consistency is key here and to make my program into something I can maintain. I try my best to track my foods but I'm really unsure on if I'm getting what I need. Once again, I appreciate the reply, it really allowed me to take a step back and not look so short term with my fitness goal.

Hey no problem! Glad I can help! You mentioned issues with going to the gym due to time constraints and not knowing where to start with your diet. If you are looking for a simple solution, I would start by monitoring your calories via MyFitnessPal and do some at home workouts. You can start by not changing what you are eating but monitor how much of it you eat. Putting yourself at a moderate caloric deficit (1-2lbs/wk) is simple enough and you will lose weight. You could then slowly start adding more whole food options and dialing in your Macros. Again, do this slowly so you do not burn out.

The home workouts could be literally anything you wanted. They could be short or long in duration and there are countless workouts on YouTube. These do not need to be perfect or yield the best outcome, but they give you the ability to workout when you can't make the trip to the gym. A 4 minute tabata push up workout is better than no workout.

You got this!

[pondman]

You really sound as if you are smart person and know this stuff already. Sounds like you've got to work through the emotional side of this. I'd give that a priority. Yeah, getting you food intake back to a reasonable levels and getting back into a lifting program, probably is a good way to focus on your goals and future.

I'd try and discourage you from the ab goal, unless you are one of those people who has a lot of genetic muscle mass. The healthiest, happiest, and fittest people I know don't show a lot of abs. I know a number of people who show a lot of ab, but they use a hell of a lot of gear and are constantly pressing their diet.