Loled at that too. Keeping up with basic house-hold chores takes a few hours per day at most. Some days may take a bit more time then others if you have to go grocery shopping or something like that.
But in her mind a woman should sit at home all day and only do like 1-2 hours worth of chores. And the dude should work 8h per day and get home and do a few hours worth of household chores. Lmao.
|
-
08-09-2020, 10:38 AM #31
-
08-09-2020, 10:43 AM #32
Not everyone has parents that aren't working jobs themselves. I can't even imagine trying to do my job with a baby or toddler here at home. There's no way I'd get my work done.
I didn't say that, but that caveman attitude makes me balk. Just because a woman is a stay at home mom doesn't mean she should be your slave. You're a grown man and you can't make your own breakfast or make your family breakfast or lunch on a weekend? Your wife has been up most of the night with your newborn and you expect her to wake up to make your breakfast? Yeah, just lol at that.
Please show me where I said that.~ In a world where you can be anything, be kind ~
-
-
08-09-2020, 11:03 AM #33
-
08-09-2020, 11:07 AM #34
Sheesh, I was exaggerating but my point still stands. If someone is going to tell their wife that is caring for a newborn 24/7 (because yes, there are newborns that don't sleep all day or happily sit in a bouncy seat all day) that they have to do every single piece of housework, cooking, errands, etc etc then that is expecting a slave and not a partner.
~ In a world where you can be anything, be kind ~
-
08-09-2020, 11:10 AM #35
I don't agree with people who think that if I go to work and my wife stays at home then she has to do everything herself.
But, if I'm on some 90 hour week from hell, she's going to need to do most of the things herself. But we would have talked about my work commitments before ever having a baby. So, I think that the partner communication / expectation is the key to a happy balance in any relationship, with or without kids.
-
08-09-2020, 11:14 AM #36
Why are you complicating it, though? Of course no man expect his wife who just had a new born child, to do 100% all of the tasks she usually does when she did not have a newborn child.
I have a friend who works a normal, steady job. 3 kids now. His wife has been a stay at home wife since the beginning, because that's what she wanted and that's how their culture and religion is.
She has never complained and does not mind cooking, cleaning, doing all the stuff a man would want his woman to do while he is working and coming home either tired or not.
She does this because she knows this makes his life better, just like he does stuff for her that makes her life better. Ying and Yang?
Does he come home and just sit there? No, he plays with the kids, kisses his wife, laughs, jokes, eat together, etc.
Edit: She even gets up before him in the morning to cook him breakfast every day for years now, without him ever asking her to do it.
-
-
08-09-2020, 11:15 AM #37
Of course a newborn is not a newborn forever. Well, I wasn't a stay at home mom when my son hit 6, so not really sure. Once he went to preschool I worked the entire time he was in school. Once I picked him up it was kids actives time/ then as he aged homework time, cooking dinner (which btw usually takes much more than 30 min) serving dinner, eating, cleaning up from dinner, any chores that needed to be done, getting him into bed and then finally being able to sit down and relax at 8-9 pm. While my ex worked 8 hours that day and sat on his ass or did whatever he wanted all night. Tell me how that's fair?
Tell me why he couldn't lift a finger and do the dishes? I'd love to hear the reasons.
Exactly this. I have no problem with pulling my weight and more when there is a partnership and exchange of responsibilities depending on the situation.~ In a world where you can be anything, be kind ~
-
08-09-2020, 11:17 AM #38
this is very true. srs.
in third world countries, all the middle class families have live-in maids plus errand boys, so a lot of chores are taken care of.
and all the families, rich or not, are relatively big or extended families live together so the women help each out more.
also, the women are trained in these things from a young age, dealing with younger siblings or cousins, or nieces and nephews.
over here, it's one woman doing everything and it's all new.
made some friends from south africa. they started laughing at how we live here, they said our women are being tortured. all of their household chores are done by domestic workers. it's the same all over africa, middle east, indopak region, etc.
-
08-09-2020, 11:18 AM #39
-
08-09-2020, 11:18 AM #40
This thread is about choosing a SAHW over a career woman. I listed my criteria for what I would expect from a woman if I were to be the sole provider for the house-hold. Your insinuating the basic list of house-hold tasks I listed is a 24/7 job. Its not. I grew up with a SAHM and my sister is a SAHM. They manage to finish all the house-hold chores in just a few hours per day. With plenty of time for recreational activities.
As it is now, I average 55h per week at work and manage to do everything around the house and yard myself. If an unemployed female moves in with me, she isn't a 50/50 partner in the relationship. A 50/50 partner would be someone with a career that splits all of the bills and house-hold chores 50/50.
If a woman isn't capable of making my life easier at home and contributing to the house-hold. Then why should I choose to house her, financially support her and allow her to be part of my life? My life is already established & secure. If someone wants to be part of my life, they have to bring something to the table other then sex. Because I don't need to marry and/or support someone financially for that.
-
-
08-09-2020, 12:29 PM #41
-
08-10-2020, 09:19 AM #42
Exactly, I look at it as an equal partnership in the above scenario.
The wife is saving $1.2 - $2k per month on day care fees, priceless amount against indoctrination or learned bad behavior, and saving money by preparing meals at home and maintaining the home.
I truly don’t understand those that hold the viewpoint that SAHM aren’t admirable. The work of a SAHM is measured in opportunity costs rather than income producing.
Bookmarks