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  1. #1
    Registered User David2112's Avatar
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    I've tried online dating three times, and I get no messages.

    I've tried OKCupid three times in a row already, and I don't get any messages. I tried Tinder and Bumble twice in the past, and it was the same thing, just a bunch of swiping. Anyone else had this problem?
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    Copeaesthetic HangingChad's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post
    I've tried OKCupid three times in a row already, and I don't get any messages. I tried Tinder and Bumble twice in the past, and it was the same thing, just a bunch of swiping. Anyone else had this problem?
    You need better pics and a better profile. What are you using now?
    物の哀れ
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  3. #3
    Registered User randomuser12345's Avatar
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    all about dem pics dude

    You need:
    1) professioanl photo of your face
    2) Full height in a suit and shoes
    3) On vacation mb playing some sports on a beach shirtless if you got good physique
    4) photo with your friends
    5) In woods or on a boat to add adventure vibe

    If you are at least 7\10 just first two can work.

    if you are below 7\10 you are entering the world of pain.
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  4. #4
    Registered User AshkenaziJew's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post
    I've tried OKCupid three times in a row already, and I don't get any messages. I tried Tinder and Bumble twice in the past, and it was the same thing, just a bunch of swiping. Anyone else had this problem?
    Okcupid and tinder are total garbage these days. I used to get hundreds of matches on tinder back in 2012-2014, these days I barely get any. They don't show your profile to most people unless you buy their crap.

    Bumble is alright if I set my distance to 30+ miles.

    Tried hinge?
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  5. #5
    Registered User David2112's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by HangingChad View Post
    You need better pics and a better profile. What are you using now?
    I tried OKC again. Nothing.
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  6. #6
    Registered User David2112's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    all about dem pics dude

    You need:
    1) professioanl photo of your face
    2) Full height in a suit and shoes
    3) On vacation mb playing some sports on a beach shirtless if you got good physique
    4) photo with your friends
    5) In woods or on a boat to add adventure vibe

    If you are at least 7\10 just first two can work.

    if you are below 7\10 you are entering the world of pain.
    1. I have that.
    2. I've done that. No change.
    3. Done something similar. Nothing.
    4. I've done that.
    5. No thanks.

    I don't believe that women go by looks, this just isn't working or something.
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  7. #7
    Registered User David2112's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by AshkenaziJew View Post
    Okcupid and tinder are total garbage these days. I used to get hundreds of matches on tinder back in 2012-2014, these days I barely get any. They don't show your profile to most people unless you buy their crap.

    Bumble is alright if I set my distance to 30+ miles.

    Tried hinge?
    Online Dating doesn't work for me for some reason. All I do is swipe, and getting messages is extremely rare. For example, On OKC, I got 12 likes last time within 3 days of my account being open, no messages except one person that said "Hey". One girl tried to meet up with me last year, but spark faded the next day.
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  8. #8
    Registered User lara012's Avatar
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    if ur messages are short , u better have a strong profile picture or we won't reply.

    There are just too many messages to filter
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  9. #9
    Registered User randomuser12345's Avatar
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    Ah lol, i missunderstood. You want girls to message you first, right? Then you better be 8\10 and above with profile pics that have some conception and tell a story with short and engaging bio.

    And even then don't expect much. Girls aren't messaging first usually, that's just how it is.
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  10. #10
    Registered User Charlie Murphy's Avatar
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    get rich and get a sugar baby. All you want is sex anyhow
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  11. #11
    Registered User JLT's Avatar
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    I keep seeing threads like this. I consider myself an average looking guy and I'm having to choose which girls I want to respond/talk to and meet up with on bumble and hinge. I found that candid pics with you doing something seem to work the best and I don't really have much of anything in my profile.
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  12. #12
    **** Love, I Want Cash. BlackScorpio91's Avatar
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    Not really.

    Even though I don't be swiping as much, I still get matches and women messaging me if I already swiped right on them.
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  13. #13
    Registered User NealIRC's Avatar
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    I only have Facebook, and have a hard time getting women to msg or add me.
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  14. #14
    brb Acquiring gains InsanePain11's Avatar
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    I get matches whether I put a strong bio or not. But I am not doing well progressing these matches into dates. I mean, I've been on a few dates but I've been doing this for months after my last breakup. Part of it is I'm picky, but I also get ghosted on occasion and plenty of girls who don't reply to messages. I think I forgot how to flirt with women (I believe I'm better in person but maybe I'm delusional). On the apps I match with some attractive women but my batting average is horrendous. I need help lol, first time in my life I feel lost and super lonely. (also still crushed from a recent family tragedy and a breakup of 6 years so that's part of it, but still I never thought I'd be this stuck..)
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  15. #15
    Copeaesthetic HangingChad's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by InsanePain11 View Post
    I get matches whether I put a strong bio or not. But I am not doing well progressing these matches into dates. I mean, I've been on a few dates but I've been doing this for months after my last breakup. Part of it is I'm picky, but I also get ghosted on occasion and plenty of girls who don't reply to messages. I think I forgot how to flirt with women (I believe I'm better in person but maybe I'm delusional). On the apps I match with some attractive women but my batting average is horrendous. I need help lol, first time in my life I feel lost and super lonely. (also still crushed from a recent family tragedy and a breakup of 6 years so that's part of it, but still I never thought I'd be this stuck..)
    Damn that sounds really rough. Six years is a long time. It's great that you're getting matches. You can experiment and try different strategies without having to worry.

    I usually have good luck if I can get their numbers and get them off the app in the first 5-10 messages. Once you get the digits, it's a lot easier to land a date because you're not competing for their attention with 100 other dudes. I'm aiming for 30s / LTR, so depending on what you're looking for it might be different for you.
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  16. #16
    Registered User BourgeoisBrah's Avatar
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    All the misc talk had scared me off from even bothering with the apps.

    I’m average looking with no pics, so I’d have to get some. I figured it would just crush my confidence more than anything.
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  17. #17
    Copeaesthetic HangingChad's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BourgeoisBrah View Post
    All the misc talk had scared me off from even bothering with the apps.

    I’m average looking with no pics, so I’d have to get some. I figured it would just crush my confidence more than anything.
    Super average here. Just try it, nothing to lose. A lot depends on location too, and some places certain apps are more popular.
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  18. #18
    Registered User Caldef's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post
    1. I have that.
    2. I've done that. No change.
    3. Done something similar. Nothing.
    4. I've done that.
    5. No thanks.

    I don't believe that women go by looks, this just isn't working or something.
    Strong cope.

    Women 100% go by looks. You think we're actually going to notice your sparkling conversation on an app? Just lol

    Take the advice, update your pics. I'm sure you can get a female friend or sister to help you choose your most aesthetic pics.
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  19. #19
    Registered User Rebel012's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post

    I don't believe that women go by looks, this just isn't working or something.
    Are you coping or just an idiot? Online dating is practically ALL about looks. Stop watching fairly tale ROM/COMS and fix your strategy
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  20. #20
    Wavy miscerForLulz's Avatar
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    David please
    Doesn't have a crew crew
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  21. #21
    Registered User snailsrus's Avatar
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    Dating online during covid, logic much
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  22. #22
    **** Love, I Want Cash. BlackScorpio91's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by snailsrus View Post
    Dating online during covid, logic much
    Hey it works and it's a good way to connect with people.

    Honestly if people are sexually attracted to you enough, they'll meet up. If they're not they come up with excuses like "We should wait after the pandemic". People are horny and sexual arousal is the most powerful biological impulse.

    Same goes with irl; if people are attracted to you enough, they'll gonna wanna meet up.
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    Registered User NealIRC's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BlackScorpio91 View Post
    Honestly if people are sexually attracted to you enough, they'll meet up. If they're not they come up with excuses like "We should wait after the pandemic". People are horny and sexual arousal is the most powerful biological impulse.

    Same goes with irl; if people are attracted to you enough, they'll gonna wanna meet up.
    This probably applies to Black girls, probably White girls. But not at all to Hispanic girls. Hispanic girls brought up by their grandmas not to chase after guys.
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  24. #24
    **** Love, I Want Cash. BlackScorpio91's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by NealIRC View Post
    This probably applies to Black girls, probably White girls. But not at all to Hispanic girls. Hispanic girls brought up by their grandmas not to chase after guys.

    Doesn't matter....if a woman is horny af, she's gonna change or accommodate her schedule to fit a guy so she can **** him. Doesn't matter the race or upbringing. And even if it's just to go on dates, same principle.

    If that doesn't happen with you then they'll not attracted to you enough.
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  25. #25
    Registered User NealIRC's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BlackScorpio91 View Post
    Doesn't matter....if a woman is horny af, she's gonna change or accommodate her schedule to fit a guy so she can **** him. Doesn't matter the race or upbringing. And even if it's just to go on dates, same principle.

    If that doesn't happen with you then they'll not attracted to you enough.
    Actually, what you can do is set up a trap experiment with women - to see if they like you or not. Women can pretend they're not into you, say they're not into you, but when that experiment proves they're into you, then it's like an insecurity test to see if they can admit that they're into you. The downfall to this is, doing the experiment itself can get her to be angry with you. Like a mindhack.
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post
    I've tried OKCupid three times in a row already, and I don't get any messages. I tried Tinder and Bumble twice in the past, and it was the same thing, just a bunch of swiping. Anyone else had this problem?
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7XzDaRG4tQ&t=1s

    Personally I have not had a major problem with dating apps, but you just have to be prepared to accept that meeting a woman on a dating app is much harder than meeting someone in person. Think about it, if you were just walking down the street and an attractive woman approached you, you would probably seize the opportunity to at the bare minimum talk to her. Now use a dating app, let's assume you had the option of choosing to talk to 25 attractive woman with that same woman in the mix. The chances of that same woman getting a chance to talk to you is even lower.Keep in mind I am merely giving an example, what I said above happens more often with woman on dating apps who are very attractive or highly attractive men.

    The only thing you can really do with dating apps is optimize your pictures to the best of your abilities and approach women with the angle of humor, especially if you really are not a highly attractive person.
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    No one on this forum men or woman is surprised looks matter we all learn that in middle school. I think what men have a gripe about here, is how FEW men are sexually attractive in womans eyes from a purely physical standpoint. It's very, very few. Most men are happy if a woman from their own country who's not overweight shows interest in them. mens wants are more basic prefrences than anything. Woman take looks to a whole new level were, you have to be tall (70% of woman admitted on this board of wanting a tall man greater than 6ft0) you have to have a low body fat, the right mixture of masculine and progressive facial features, muscularity, the right hair - just a genetically gifted specimen overall. Men are for more lax on what they find sexually attractive. pull 10 random woman off the street around the age that arent fat (around 18), and I'm willing to bet we will find an appropriate amount of them suitable for a ltr. Now do the same to women and line up 10 non-fat guys, and I'll bet you they will find only one or two attractive, sometimes none.

    Woman are asked who they find attractive and they list men like Ian somerhalder, or henry cavil. When men are asked they will say like uh that one girl in my class, or the girl at work or the girl next door.
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    Originally Posted by David2112 View Post
    I've tried OKCupid three times in a row already, and I don't get any messages. I tried Tinder and Bumble twice in the past, and it was the same thing, just a bunch of swiping. Anyone else had this problem?
    It might depend on the type of thing you say when you message them. Sometimes the best thing is just to say hey rather than a comment about them or yourself etc. If you start a conversation how you would a friend then you might get a reply.
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