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  1. #1
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Exclamation How do you guys deal with post relationship regret?

    Guys I feel like i'm over my ex. Only because my frequency of thinking of her is less and less and my memories of her are less and less. We did only go out for 7 months after all.

    But I guess, what makes me a bit sad is the regret. How do you guys deal with it?

    In hindsight, she was a good girlfriend. She didn't drain my life. She improved my life. She wanted a relationship. I took her for granted, didn't give a fark tried to act alpha (but was actually really beta), just went full retarded and I don't blame her for losing attraction for me

    It's been a year and although I've had my issues I feel like I've improved as a male . And I guess what gets me down is knowing that if I were to meet her now, the relationship would be a lot different. And I know she'd respect me, love me more and wouldn't lose attraction for me.

    I date other girls and been out with other chicks but it was getting so depressing that I've stopped and went back to seeing hookers. It's not my life goal to find a girlfriend, and I don't really care so much about chasing pussy anymore and I've gotten used to being on my own....but it's more like what could of been? Do you guys ever think like this? do you end up finding someone "better" ?

    I keep trying to find the same feeling and a similar girl like my ex but time and time again these girls don't seem to measure up and/or I don't feel anything. I don't enjoy their company. They don't really add to my life.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  2. #2
    B- grad student Cadet4life's Avatar
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    i appreciate the time spent with the other person but realize nothing is forever.

    seems like you're trying to find joy in life through a girl. you'll never be happy if you do that. woman aren't here to make you happy. fine other things in life that bring you joy, something that is actually controllable. such as a hobby. i love mountain biking. i ride 3-4 times a week and it makes me happy.
    be the turtle in the race.
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  3. #3
    Registered User Vrykul's Avatar
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    I deal with it by negging OP

    edit: on spread
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  4. #4
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Cadet4life View Post
    i appreciate the time spent with the other person but realize nothing is forever.

    seems like you're trying to find joy in life through a girl. you'll never be happy if you do that. woman aren't here to make you happy. fine other things in life that bring you joy, something that is actually controllable. such as a hobby. i love mountain biking. i ride 3-4 times a week and it makes me happy.
    Yea I get what you're saying but life was better with a girlfriend at least for me, having someone to do fun stuff with, sex , love affection . I no longer feel so dependent on having a girlfriend but I felt like I was happier and life was better with one than without one. (Better than being lonely / no sex etc)

    Originally Posted by Vrykul View Post
    I deal with it by negging OP

    edit: on spread
    negged man I'm not trolling just trying to improve my life and I come here for support as I don't really have anyone in real life. I' actually trying man. negged.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  5. #5
    Registered User Vrykul's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sandman2019 View Post
    negged man I'm not trolling just trying to improve my life and I come here for support as I don't really have anyone in real life. I' actually trying man. negged.
    You already made at least 10 threads about this and got 500 posts of advice and ignored all of it

    Stop wasting people's time phaggot
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  6. #6
    Not actually fat or a kid Fatkidwholifts's Avatar
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    -date a girl for 7 months

    -spend 8 months crying about her on the internet
    Once upon a time:

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    Currently Washed up.
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  7. #7
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Vrykul View Post
    You already made at least 10 threads about this and got 500 posts of advice and ignored all of it

    Stop wasting people's time phaggot
    Yes and I've followed the advice. Going no contact and getting hobbies has really helped, I also start a new job . But unfortunately I haven't really been able to replace her and sometimes I think about the regret and what could of been.

    Originally Posted by Fatkidwholifts View Post
    -date a girl for 7 months

    -spend 8 months crying about her on the internet
    1 year actually (crying about her)
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  8. #8
    Registered User JmanOnOne's Avatar
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    What I find hard to understand is even men that are woke and understand no relationship lasts forever and women are just not monogamous at all, is why even bother trying to have a relationship? That guy said he appreciates the time spent, but why put yourself into a situation like that in the first place? It's almost impossible not to get emotionally attached otherwise it's just a fook buddy, so why go through all the mess of a breakup and feeling like chit when you already know monogamy and happily ever after doesn't exist in women? Serious question.
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  9. #9
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JmanOnOne View Post
    What I find hard to understand is even men that are woke and understand no relationship lasts forever and women are just not monogamous at all, is why even bother trying to have a relationship? That guy said he appreciates the time spent, but why put yourself into a situation like that in the first place? It's almost impossible not to get emotionally attached otherwise it's just a fook buddy, so why go through all the mess of a breakup and feeling like chit when you already know monogamy and happily ever after doesn't exist in women? Serious question.
    Yea good point, but there are certain aspects of having a relationship I really enjoyed and I found a good relationship beats being lonely.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  10. #10
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    bump - feeling pretty depressed. I've forgotten about my ex but it's a lot better than being lonely. And been 1 year haven't found better. How do you move on from the regret of having a good girlfriend and losing a good gf?
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  11. #11
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TechniqueBrah View Post
    Yeah like the first comment said, vast majority of women are never going to bring you joy in life lmao.

    The sooner you realise this the better my guy, PM me if you ever need to have a chat
    really?

    I was happier with a girlfriend than without a girlfriend, going out and doing fun stuff having good sex etc. You're saying that women don't bring you happiness/joy?
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
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    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  12. #12
    Powerlifting Doctor Hardlifter9's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TechniqueBrah View Post
    You were happy... But that happiness was temporary. Relying on women for happiness doesn't fulfil you in the long term, doing something you're passionate about does however.
    Companionship is a natural human desire.
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  13. #13
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TechniqueBrah View Post
    You were happy... But that happiness was temporary. Relying on women for happiness doesn't fulfil you in the long term, doing something you're passionate about does however.
    but isn't that why we are on this earth brother? to pro create.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  14. #14
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    checked her social media first time in ages and watched stories of her on all these dates with her guy and I felt so sad man. srs. could of been me. feel so angry man.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  15. #15
    Registered User cantsquat315's Avatar
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    I had a good gf for 6 years, who would do anything for me, even look past some mistakes I did, as I was becoming unsure about that level of closeness, and she was more of what you could call traditional woman. What did I do? I went for a total sl00t, who was NPD psychopatic ****, because she was bringing me highs like a drug. The sloot discarded me.

    Its interesting how this **** turned out because just when I was playing Witcher 3, and I was in dilemma between Yennefer and Triss, as I picked Triss during the dialog, this sloot hoovered after NC. Heard Triss is a cold back stabbing bitch later on and Yennefer is better long term option. But Triss was more fun to me. I threw it all away and began dating sloot more seriously. Way to go. Now both are gone.

    Now I’ve lost my motivation to finish W3, just too many triggers there.
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  16. #16
    Registered User newbuck's Avatar
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    What regret is there? I thought she cheated on you, find a better woman
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    Originally Posted by sandman2019 View Post
    checked her social media first time in ages and watched stories of her on all these dates with her guy and I felt so sad man. srs. could of been me. feel so angry man.
    You made a mistake. Ill never in a million years check her SM, no way.

    Say, do you have any of her photos that u took or two of u together? I locked mine away to an archive and stored it to one of my servers but I get too many urges to fap to them and sometimes I do.
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  18. #18
    Registered User JmanOnOne's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Hardlifter9 View Post
    Companionship is a natural human disaster
    Fixed your quote. Also I don't desire it as I'm aware of what cheating sloots women are not capable of monogamy or love, so why would I waste my time putting myself into a chitty situation that's never going to last? Like the other guy said put your happiness into a passion of yours like a hobby, much better for you mentally than being with a woman.
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  19. #19
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    Originally Posted by newbuck View Post
    What regret is there? I thought she cheated on you, find a better woman
    Lol @ find a better woman. They're all the fukking same same nature, cheating little hypergamous sloots not capable of love or long term monogamy. Instead you should advise him to avoid them at all costs and use the little cum dumpsters for sexual reasons only.
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  20. #20
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    Sometimes I feel s awfully depessed like tday. Shocking day. I felt like crying all day I just watned to go back in time and be with my ex, having fun etc.

    Now i'm older, uglier, my face looks like crap (Finasteride) balding and greying, women don't even look at me. I feel horrible. Maybe because i've slept 1 hour lol. But honestly I want to go back guys I want to be with her, having fun, getting food going out. Life is feels so pointless.

    and when you're short and ugly its ****ing pointless. such is life. Sometimes I have thoughts that are real bad.
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew *
    * clown world crew *
    * Can't get a better girl than my oneitis crew*
    * Feel depressed that I can't remember my oneitis crew *
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  21. #21
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    Originally Posted by sandman2019 View Post
    Sometimes I feel s awfully depessed like tday. Shocking day. I felt like crying all day I just watned to go back in time and be with my ex, having fun etc.

    Now i'm older, uglier, my face looks like crap (Finasteride) balding and greying, women don't even look at me. I feel horrible. Maybe because i've slept 1 hour lol. But honestly I want to go back guys I want to be with her, having fun, getting food going out. Life is feels so pointless.

    and when you're short and ugly its ****ing pointless. such is life. Sometimes I have thoughts that are real bad.

    Give it time.

    The best thing you can do is focus on doing things that make you happy and improving your own life.

    It won't all happen overnight but eventually you'll get to a point where you're actually pretty content overall.

    Also the chemicals that make you happy, you can produce those naturally through regular exercise, good sleeping habits, decent nutrition, associating with good people and getting outdoors.

    Probably too much time miscing is not good for you tho srs.

    It's natural to want human companionship. And a good partner will improve your life. Be careful of course, cos a bad choice will set you back....not all women are bad (despite what some miscers will tell you) but the good ones do tend to be taken. But not always.

    Most of all just keep moving forward.
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  22. #22
    Registered User Beararms's Avatar
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    You need professional help, very srs

    You have been making threads for weeks/months crying about this one woman. Misc isn't going to help you, you get advice and you constantly cry about the exact same thing. You honestly need to move on. You have an unhealthy obsession with that woman and its very sad/creepy.
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    You've went on about how she does not have qualities that make her appealing long term (to which misc agrees). The reality is you need much self-improvement and to get your head in a better space before you can attract/keep someone with desirable qualities for a LTR.

    It only hurts because it ended before you were ready for it to end.
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    I think you’re massively in denial OP. This is my first post in over a month and you’re still making threads about this girl. You say you’re over her but if that was truly the case you wouldn’t keep making threads about her. Not sure why you’re still checking her social media either, big mistake. Rather than pulling the plaster off quickly you’re just doing it slowly and prolonging the pain.

    Originally Posted by sandman2019 View Post
    It's been a year and although I've had my issues I feel like I've improved as a male . And I guess what gets me down is knowing that if I were to meet her now, the relationship would be a lot different. And I know she'd respect me, love me more and wouldn't lose attraction for me.
    I can actually relate to this a lot. I wish I knew in my previous relationship what I know now. But I don’t regret what happened because the funny thing is had it not been for the relationship I wouldn’t have learned what I did.

    So try to treat it as a learning experience to improve your next relationship. Focus on yourself, stop putting this one girl on a pedestal and realise there are tons of other girls out there who will make you just as happy if not more.
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    Originally Posted by Caldef View Post

    The best thing you can do is focus on doing things that make you happy and improving your own life.
    This is thrown around often. What does it even mean?

    Improve for what and by whose standards? Do things that make you happy? Thats just chemical and serotonin manipulation which is difficult when its just been cut off. Being "happy" and improving so much because somethings obviously not good enough are complete opposites.
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    Originally Posted by sandman2019 View Post
    checked her social media first time in ages and watched stories of her on all these dates with her guy and I felt so sad man. srs. could of been me. feel so angry man.
    I still check social media of my exes but it's moreso to see how they're doing and hoping they find whatever/whomever they were looking for. I genuinely just want them to be happy since I'm married and happy myself.

    But you're not at that point in your life yet so stay off social media and go hard NC. Keep busy and you'll get better. It always gets better. Fukc more hookers if need be, slap them around to relieve some tension.
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    You’re losing your ****ing mind man. Internet people can’t do anything more for you. Get help.
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    With Hookers, Gym, alcohol, and gambling. But you already tried all of that. It's been more than a year. She doesn't want you anymore dude, get over her. Why should you give a fuk about a woman who doesn't care about you?
    If your right leg is Thanksgiving and your left leg is Christmas, can I come and visit you between the holidays?
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  29. #29
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    Originally Posted by Caldef View Post
    Give it time.

    The best thing you can do is focus on doing things that make you happy and improving your own life.

    It won't all happen overnight but eventually you'll get to a point where you're actually pretty content overall.

    Also the chemicals that make you happy, you can produce those naturally through regular exercise, good sleeping habits, decent nutrition, associating with good people and getting outdoors.

    Probably too much time miscing is not good for you tho srs.

    It's natural to want human companionship. And a good partner will improve your life. Be careful of course, cos a bad choice will set you back....not all women are bad (despite what some miscers will tell you) but the good ones do tend to be taken. But not always.

    Most of all just keep moving forward.
    But i'm ugly and short and balding I won't get another girlfriend like her.

    Originally Posted by Beararms View Post
    You need professional help, very srs

    You have been making threads for weeks/months crying about this one woman. Misc isn't going to help you, you get advice and you constantly cry about the exact same thing. You honestly need to move on. You have an unhealthy obsession with that woman and its very sad/creepy.
    I know man. I know it's creepy and sad. I just find life so meaningless and pointless. I've seen a psychologist it hasn't really helped. It helped a bit but not that much. I just can't move on. It's weird some days I remember her so well other times not so much but it makes me so depressed (still) just knowing I failed, I won't do better and i'm lonely. I know this girl was a "hoe" but I keep thinking, I could of made her a girlfriend. I could be going out with her doing fun stuff, sex etc now I got no one and i'm ugly.

    Originally Posted by skinnyfat88 View Post
    You've went on about how she does not have qualities that make her appealing long term (to which misc agrees). The reality is you need much self-improvement and to get your head in a better space before you can attract/keep someone with desirable qualities for a LTR.

    It only hurts because it ended before you were ready for it to end.
    Yes guess you're right I was still so excited to be with her and so many things I wanted to do with her, Sooo many things. But at the same time it's like, imagine if I ddid all those things, she probably would of cheated anyway. But would she? who knows. it still hurts to think about it.

    Originally Posted by cannon300 View Post
    I think you’re massively in denial OP. This is my first post in over a month and you’re still making threads about this girl. You say you’re over her but if that was truly the case you wouldn’t keep making threads about her. Not sure why you’re still checking her social media either, big mistake. Rather than pulling the plaster off quickly you’re just doing it slowly and prolonging the pain.



    I can actually relate to this a lot. I wish I knew in my previous relationship what I know now. But I don’t regret what happened because the funny thing is had it not been for the relationship I wouldn’t have learned what I did.

    So try to treat it as a learning experience to improve your next relationship. Focus on yourself, stop putting this one girl on a pedestal and realise there are tons of other girls out there who will make you just as happy if not more.
    This is such cope man there wont be another ****ng time, there wont be im ugly now man. and the girls I attrct aren't like my ex. learning experience sure, but what if someone dies in a helicopter accident .e.g. kobe byrant? don't worry koby it's a learning experience!!

    Originally Posted by homersexual View Post
    I still check social media of my exes but it's moreso to see how they're doing and hoping they find whatever/whomever they were looking for. I genuinely just want them to be happy since I'm married and happy myself.

    But you're not at that point in your life yet so stay off social media and go hard NC. Keep busy and you'll get better. It always gets better. Fukc more hookers if need be, slap them around to relieve some tension.
    thanks man

    Originally Posted by Fang2 View Post
    With Hookers, Gym, alcohol, and gambling. But you already tried all of that. It's been more than a year. She doesn't want you anymore dude, get over her. Why should you give a fuk about a woman who doesn't care about you?
    nothing works man
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  30. #30
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    It's been said over and over and over to you about what to do, and that this chick was nothing. The real problem remains yourself. You view yourself as an ugly loser with nothing to offer to anybody and no genuine interests or happiness before you even met her. You had problems way before this girl apparently. Perhaps you didn't get enough love from your mom and dad growing up and are trying to fulfill that with a gf who loves you. I dunno, I'm not a psychologist.

    Tell me what woman wants to date a man who views himself as a an ugly loser who is just an awful consolation prize because there's nothing else better and available at the moment? If you are in fact as ugly as YOU view yourself, then your defeated personality that you show on here sure as hell isn't going to help anything. Again this is how you view yourself. I've seen a 28 year old girl who I'd rate as an 8/10 out the last few Fridays at a Tavern with a bf that looks like a total frat slob. This dude hasn't had a haircut in weeks, doesn't shave or maintain his beard if that's what he's going for, has a total keg of a belly, not in shape at all, wasn't tall, or anything. She had a marketing company that she ran, and this dude worked for her, so it wasn't money. Apparently she saw something in him personality wise and his looks were somehow cute enough to her to give it a try at the beginning. Crazy how attraction works. It doesn't work when the guy above views himself as I described him.
    Last edited by Imnew1; 06-18-2020 at 06:22 AM.
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