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  1. #1
    Registered User direstraits18's Avatar
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    Did I make the right move ending things with this person?

    * Sorry for long text dont kill me, cliffs at bottom

    so I am a 32 Male, she is 26 years old, I met her through someone I knew a while back and she always had a crush on me, well when things ended in her relationship she reached out and came over and we had sex immediately, it turned into a hook up/ hang out thing all throughout the summer but never dates or anything, I made it clear and she heard me we could never date (I just never saw it happening). Anyways fast forward to a month or so ago I was dating around and came to a realization that I actually do want to date this person and that she is an awesome fit for me (we have almost identical interests/ always get a long). I asked her to come over to talk I told her I wanted to start dating and she was taken back, but she did say I moved on from you and started dating someone, I suggested lets try it, so we tried dating for a month and it was AWESOME we had a great time, last week she slept over and I told her I had dating apps I wanted to delete and wanted to be exclusive. she told me she needed more time (specifically saturday) this is when she was going to see this person and decide on things, I thought it was really weird, we had another sleep over during the week and after she had her friend go shopping with her, I texted her throughout the day but nothing all until the following morning, I texted her saying i’m going to the gym you must of had a hot date, she told me she didnt but something tells me she did since we always text constantly. I started thinking more and during the night I texted her saying Hey I had a lot of time to think and I really like you but I dont like this situation, I dont like waiting for a day to find out if you want to be with me or this other person. she didnt really fit for our relationship in the text, she told me if thats what I want then she understands, she told me I always will have a soft spot but maybe we should do this. I agreed and blocked her on social media and moved on, I am so confused why this person.Really liked me for all this time, and finally when I want to be in a relationship she didnt want to commit, I told her she can take as much time as she wants to figure out us being exclusive that wasnt what bothered me, what bothered me is she is seeing two different men (me and this other person) and I don’t like how she wasnt genuinely ready like I was, I also didnt like how she didnt fight for this when I sent the message saying I didnt like the situation and maybe we shouldnt pursue this, I wrote her off and a lot of friends agreed that I made the right move because if a person doesn’t have the same feelings as you then why pursue them, I do understand I came back into her life demanding a lot but still. I would LOVE to hear other peoples opinions, I dont know if she will reach out ever but I will never contact her unless she does, I feel like everything is in her court. Our final text was me ending things saying something along the lines of dont worry I'll get over this quick since it was new for our relationship transition, she said she always had a soft spot for me.


    - Banged girl once she ended things with her bf (she had a crush on me the entire time, she came over as soon as break up)
    - Hooked up for the whole summer ( she heard me tell my friends she is easy and wouldn't actually date her)
    - Dated multiple women found out she actually is a someone that is really compatible with me
    - She "moved on" from me since I was a ****boy and started dating someone else
    - She was willing to try dating with me, we did for a month
    - Told her I had dating apps that I was willing to delete and be exclusive
    - She told me she was still seeing another guy and wanted to wait till Saturday for closure ( had this conversation 5 days prior)
    - I texted her explaining how I felt and didnt want to be part of a choice between two guys, she didnt fight much for our relationship.
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  2. #2
    Registered User sandman2019's Avatar
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    sounds like a young sloot wh ocan't make up her mind probably would of cheated on you anyway
    *pray everyday that my ex gets corona crew
    * misc all day at work coz no friends at work crew
    * hide in my car on saturday night so my ant farm think i have a social life crew
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  3. #3
    Registered User PxV's Avatar
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    When you're an option to someone, you don't put them as a priority. It'll suck in the beginning but you'll make it through. GL OP.
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  4. #4
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    Well, you didn't really end anything... she did that for you.

    Remember back when you met her and pretty much said you couldn't date? That has something to do with this and do you actually expect her to just come rushing back to you? She doesn't see you the same way and likes another guy right now so let her go be happy.

    You let her hear you tell your friends she's easy and would never date her? Just LOL at thinking this girl should actually end up with you.

    You did this to yourself dude.
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  5. #5
    Registered User savageoldman's Avatar
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    so she played her trap card and you fell for it lol
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  6. #6
    Registered User direstraits18's Avatar
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    direstraits18 is offline
    Originally Posted by dolvioblue View Post
    Well, you didn't really end anything... she did that for you.

    Remember back when you met her and pretty much said you couldn't date? That has something to do with this and do you actually expect her to just come rushing back to you? She doesn't see you the same way and likes another guy right now so let her go be happy.

    You let her hear you tell your friends she's easy and would never date her? Just LOL at thinking this girl should actually end up with you.

    You did this to yourself dude.
    As it stands she wanted time to see this person and figure things out, I wanted exclusivity, we had conflicted desires so I ended things. I get that she heard what I said to friends, can you blame me? she was at my house having sex at 2 am close to the time her boyfriend broke up with her, all summer it was hook ups and hangouts, thats it, I changed and wanted a relationship (which looking back doesnt seem too ideal) we just get along really well, or at least we did before this transition and blocking on social media and such.
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  7. #7
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    dolvioblue is offline
    Originally Posted by direstraits18 View Post
    As it stands she wanted time to see this person and figure things out, I wanted exclusivity, we had conflicted desires so I ended things. I get that she heard what I said to friends, can you blame me? she was at my house having sex at 2 am close to the time her boyfriend broke up with her, all summer it was hook ups and hangouts, thats it, I changed and wanted a relationship (which looking back doesnt seem too ideal) we just get along really well, or at least we did before this transition and blocking on social media and such.
    It’s interesting that is men always make a snap decision and sometimes regret that later after we see who people really are.

    Let’s take a step back here and not be so quick to just delete her from your life. You probably confused here coming back into her life while she was seeing someone else. If it were me I’d focus on being stable and reliable feeling for her because when it ends with this new guy of hers she may text you at 2am again missing you.

    Just because she found someone else doesn’t mean you have to throw her away. Let her do as she pleases and if she finds her way back to you it’s meant to be. Perhaps it’s just not your time.
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  8. #8
    Registered User direstraits18's Avatar
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    direstraits18 is offline
    Originally Posted by dolvioblue View Post
    It’s interesting that is men always make a snap decision and sometimes regret that later after we see who people really are.

    Let’s take a step back here and not be so quick to just delete her from your life. You probably confused here coming back into her life while she was seeing someone else. If it were me I’d focus on being stable and reliable feeling for her because when it ends with this new guy of hers she may text you at 2am again missing you.

    Just because she found someone else doesn’t mean you have to throw her away. Let her do as she pleases and if she finds her way back to you it’s meant to be. Perhaps it’s just not your time.
    Right but here is the negatives (which I should have mentioned)

    - jumped on me a week after break up (she did have a crush on me)
    - she didn't fight when I suggested ending things she lives 2 min from me and when things got akward I went to her house and talked to her before this fiasco
    - She really liked me during the summer and DM'ed my roommate/friend asking for information about me idk why, she sent him an ass pick of her as a present for him telling information about me, she denied it when I asked her about it before the ending of the relationship
    - her insta does have a lot of revealing pics (out of relationship wanting attention)

    besides those red flags everything else is great when we are together.
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  9. #9
    Registered User SBB1's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by direstraits18 View Post
    * Sorry for long text dont kill me, cliffs at bottom

    so I am a 32 Male, she is 26 years old, I met her through someone I knew a while back and she always had a crush on me, well when things ended in her relationship she reached out and came over and we had sex immediately, it turned into a hook up/ hang out thing all throughout the summer but never dates or anything, I made it clear and she heard me we could never date (I just never saw it happening). Anyways fast forward to a month or so ago I was dating around and came to a realization that I actually do want to date this person and that she is an awesome fit for me (we have almost identical interests/ always get a long). I asked her to come over to talk I told her I wanted to start dating and she was taken back, but she did say I moved on from you and started dating someone, I suggested lets try it, so we tried dating for a month and it was AWESOME we had a great time, last week she slept over and I told her I had dating apps I wanted to delete and wanted to be exclusive. she told me she needed more time (specifically saturday) this is when she was going to see this person and decide on things, I thought it was really weird, we had another sleep over during the week and after she had her friend go shopping with her, I texted her throughout the day but nothing all until the following morning, I texted her saying i’m going to the gym you must of had a hot date, she told me she didnt but something tells me she did since we always text constantly. I started thinking more and during the night I texted her saying Hey I had a lot of time to think and I really like you but I dont like this situation, I dont like waiting for a day to find out if you want to be with me or this other person. she didnt really fit for our relationship in the text, she told me if thats what I want then she understands, she told me I always will have a soft spot but maybe we should do this. I agreed and blocked her on social media and moved on, I am so confused why this person.Really liked me for all this time, and finally when I want to be in a relationship she didnt want to commit, I told her she can take as much time as she wants to figure out us being exclusive that wasnt what bothered me, what bothered me is she is seeing two different men (me and this other person) and I don’t like how she wasnt genuinely ready like I was, I also didnt like how she didnt fight for this when I sent the message saying I didnt like the situation and maybe we shouldnt pursue this, I wrote her off and a lot of friends agreed that I made the right move because if a person doesn’t have the same feelings as you then why pursue them, I do understand I came back into her life demanding a lot but still. I would LOVE to hear other peoples opinions, I dont know if she will reach out ever but I will never contact her unless she does, I feel like everything is in her court. Our final text was me ending things saying something along the lines of dont worry I'll get over this quick since it was new for our relationship transition, she said she always had a soft spot for me.


    - Banged girl once she ended things with her bf (she had a crush on me the entire time, she came over as soon as break up)
    - Hooked up for the whole summer ( she heard me tell my friends she is easy and wouldn't actually date her)
    - Dated multiple women found out she actually is a someone that is really compatible with me
    - She "moved on" from me since I was a ****boy and started dating someone else
    - She was willing to try dating with me, we did for a month
    - Told her I had dating apps that I was willing to delete and be exclusive
    - She told me she was still seeing another guy and wanted to wait till Saturday for closure ( had this conversation 5 days prior)
    - I texted her explaining how I felt and didnt want to be part of a choice between two guys, she didnt fight much for our relationship.
    I’d say continue dating other women, when she reaches out, set a date and have fun.

    Do not drop all other options for her as she seems she’s also playing the field and just seeing what she likes, telling a girl you don’t want to be in competition with other guys is kind of a feminine move. Who cares if she is talking to/dating other guys because

    1) you’re dating other chicks
    2) she either wins and chooses you or she chooses one of the other dudes, if so, her loss
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