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  1. #1
    JOIN DATE: 2005 graciejjbrazil's Avatar
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    Talking Made a funny email application for a marketing job after losing my old job

    I live in Miami and my industry got destroyed by this Corona Virus so I'm venturing into marketing which I've done at the self employed level.

    Email subject line: Marketing intern application
    I don't know who you are, I don't know what you want.

    If you are looking for a cookie cutter robot, I can tell you I don't have that trait, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career.

    Skills that make me a nightmare for your competitors.

    If your hire me now, that will be the end of it.

    I will not look for you, I will not pursue you.

    But if you don't, I will look for you, I will pursue you and I will convince you.

    Ok, so I hope you liked my creativity from the famous "Taken" movie speech as I'm sure this position requires creativity and thinking outside the box.

    After spending 3 years in the Air Forc as a crew chief at Joint Base Charleston, I've learned how to think outside the box to complete daunting tasks.

    https://www.esquire.com/entertainmen.../taken-speech/

    Besides being able to be the Batman to your Robin and having amazing coffee making skills (yes I can pour hot water very well) I have worked as a freelance direct response copywriter making clients such as JackManleyTV (1.2 million subscribers) over $6000 his first week on a $37 digital product with my email marketing strategy and copywriting.

    After that I decided to use Gary VaynerChucks jab, jab, right hook method of offering value to other influencers Instagram accounts in exchange for collaborations and shout outs and grew my Instagram account to around 80,000 followers.

    Currently I am experimenting with rebranding it so I can write a case study on the negative engagementand ROI of a rebrand with a tier 3 audience compared to starting from scratch.

    I understand this form of application might be so unique as it will catch you off guard but I'm expecting this is the type of effort and creative you want your interns to have.

    With no further ado, I'd love to set up a phone conversation just confirmed that I am:

    A) Not Liam Neeson from "Taken"
    B) Creative but not crazy
    C) 100% stoked to create incredible content

    - Brent (Batman) L*** (843-***-****)
    venmo: @brent-laclair
    paypal: brentgraciejj@gmail.com
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  2. #2
    Banned wincel's Avatar
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  3. #3
    Platinum OG user Evolutionary1's Avatar
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    cringe.. proofread
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  4. #4
    sheet it forward stevemckenna's Avatar
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  5. #5
    You Never Had Me Fuqdatass's Avatar
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    I don’t want a large farva, I want a goddamn liter of cola

    Send In The Clowns
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  6. #6
    Banned ZeroPercentTip's Avatar
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    I would hire you just so I could fire you that same day
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  7. #7
    JOIN DATE: 2005 graciejjbrazil's Avatar
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    Lol I love how bad this turned out.

    I can find the humor in failing, going to be so much funnier when I am homeless.
    venmo: @brent-laclair
    paypal: brentgraciejj@gmail.com
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