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  1. #31
    Registered User user3657's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sunsean View Post
    Not all guys are aggressive. Instead of never replying to him and always waiting, take the initiative. If he’s interested, you’ll know.

    A couple posters said this more or less bit you don’t seem to want to hear it.
    OP is on some 1500 fantasy BS.
    If he is really travelling and working his ass off like you say he is, yes he is interested in you but the second he dropped you off he completely forgot about you because his life came back on. Some girls dont get this part. Not all guys are interested in chasing pussy. it should be 50 50. Some guys are too busy to chase pussy and or dont need it.

    He told you he was feeling you, so why dont you send him a text saying you are interested in going to that spot you mentioned....?


    Some of these guys that are balling and travel, they have gfs in every state. Keep that in mind...I had a co-worker who dated a guy for 2 or 3 years(?) and found out he was engaged to another girl. I dont want to scare you but just giving you a heads up. I think that is pathetic. Plenty of girls will mess around if guys are honest...
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  2. #32
    Registered User Caldef's Avatar
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    Could be a lot of things.

    Could be he's genuinely busy or could be he's met someone else in the meantime.

    Also hate to be bearer of bad news but if he was total gentleman etc but also didn't try to kiss goodnight on first date then could be that he's not actually that into you but doesn't want to be a jerk. So is just doing the slow fade.

    And you know that we girls do the slow fade all the time so....

    On the other hand soemtimes those types of guys are just taking their time processing ****. Are you friends on social media?
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  3. #33
    Registered User jebrooks1988's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Caldef View Post
    Could be a lot of things.

    Could be he's genuinely busy or could be he's met someone else in the meantime.

    Also hate to be bearer of bad news but if he was total gentleman etc but also didn't try to kiss goodnight on first date then could be that he's not actually that into you but doesn't want to be a jerk. So is just doing the slow fade.

    And you know that we girls do the slow fade all the time so....

    On the other hand soemtimes those types of guys are just taking their time processing ****. Are you friends on social media?
    Yea, we’re friends on social media.
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  4. #34
    Registered User vanballmoos's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Caldef View Post
    Could be a lot of things.

    Could be he's genuinely busy or could be he's met someone else in the meantime.

    Also hate to be bearer of bad news but if he was total gentleman etc but also didn't try to kiss goodnight on first date then could be that he's not actually that into you but doesn't want to be a jerk. So is just doing the slow fade.

    And you know that we girls do the slow fade all the time so....

    On the other hand soemtimes those types of guys are just taking their time processing ****. Are you friends on social media?

    I didn’t kiss my current gf until the 3rd date and I was crazy about her from the beginning.

    No matter how nice a man is, he isn’t making an hour round trip to drop you off unless he’s really interested or believes sex is on the table. He could’ve gotten her an Uber or seen her off if he wanted to be nice. I’m not spending an extra hour with someone unless I want to.
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  5. #35
    Registered User ezjax's Avatar
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    I'm old now.. and it's a different world.. but literally every girl I ever went on a date with texted or called me with the same line "I want to see you"

    As a matter of fact they would call or text all day.. was a constant running dialog.

    I realize this may be different now.. but the whole busy with life thing is fake.. if you like someone you talk to them constantly.. especially if it looks like it's going toward romantic. Initiating conversation after the date always came from the woman
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  6. #36
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ezjax View Post
    I'm old now.. and it's a different world.. but literally every girl I ever went on a date with texted or called me with the same line "I want to see you"

    As a matter of fact they would call or text all day.. was a constant running dialog.

    I realize this may be different now.. but the whole busy with life thing is fake.. if you like someone you talk to them constantly.. especially if it looks like it's going toward romantic. Initiating conversation after the date always came from the woman

    This...
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  7. #37
    Registered User jebrooks1988's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dolvioblue View Post
    This...

    Really? I just figured if he was interested enough he would ask because men take the lead and go after what they want
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  8. #38
    Registered User jebrooks1988's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ezjax View Post
    I'm old now.. and it's a different world.. but literally every girl I ever went on a date with texted or called me with the same line "I want to see you"

    As a matter of fact they would call or text all day.. was a constant running dialog.

    I realize this may be different now.. but the whole busy with life thing is fake.. if you like someone you talk to them constantly.. especially if it looks like it's going toward romantic. Initiating conversation after the date always came from the woman

    Thanks for the insight. I assumed he would plan after, not the other way around.

    I forgot, before an hour before our date he texted me asking how I was. I said I’m good and then he asked if I was still on time for our date because of the other times went he wanted to double check. I guess he wanted to make sure I wasn’t going to bail?

    However, I thought I was showing interest.
    He gets of the car to drop me off and he said we should do this again and mentioned going to that spot I wanted to try to which I replied either yea sure or yea we can do that. He comes in for a hug, kisses me on the temple and I go inside. All that seems affirmative enough to me?
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  9. #39
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jebrooks1988 View Post
    Really? I just figured if he was interested enough he would ask because men take the lead and go after what they want
    Some men do and some don’t have to anymore. Long gone are the days where attractive men really have to chase women... we have options now and women are messaging us for dates since the inception of online dating.

    My friend sounds a little like you... and I often say “just text him and ask him out!”. I tell her all the time things have changed in the dating world.

    Additionally, women have been doing things like this to men since the beginning of time. Slow fade, wasting time, stringing ya along,etc. It happens one time to one women and we have a whole thread about it.

    How about you take control of your life and go after what you want. You went out a couple times and I’m sure you’re not some sort of unicorn so perhaps you need to put in a little more effort and give him something to chase. Don’t be lazy...
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  10. #40
    Restomodding sumolgi's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jebrooks1988 View Post
    he was working on Saturday and his business has some big project that he plans on revealing Monday/Tuesday. Still no asking for a date though. Hasn’t texted me since Friday.
    You're overthinking. The guy is busy with his livelihood. Hit him Wednesday and ask him how the reveal went and if he wants to hit that spot on the weekend. His response will tell you all you need to know. Just my $.02
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  11. #41
    Starvation Mode GO! NitrogenWidget's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Anachron View Post
    ITT, someone learned their actual value.
    I wouldn't say that.
    It does seem like she wants him to chase her and well, if he is as successful as she claims, i'm willing to bet there are other women chasing him and he would rather go the route.
    just a guess but because of all the mishaps, it left time for him to go out with other women and he may of found one he liked but still went out with OP and decided he wasn't into her anymore.

    Instead of posting about it and letting him fade away OP should just ask him out.
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  12. #42
    muscular Brahette-Goddess MeFromG's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by sumolgi View Post
    ... Hit him Wednesday and ask him how the reveal went and if he wants to hit that spot on the weekend. His response will tell you all you need to know. Just my $.02
    Exactly. And if he doesn't have time or he doesn't suggest another day, forget him asap. You don't have time, nerves, energy for players... Many more and much, much better male options out there. Find your one :-). Plus focus on yourself and what you want, your goals, your work, your life.
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  13. #43
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    this dude is either playing by a script and not trying to look needy/clingy and expecting you to chase more

    or

    he's genuinely busy and is playing the field with other options

    or

    he thinks you're not interested cuz he isn't reading you right and he probably doesn't know what the fuk he's doing


    I'd say just play it cool and pull back. If he contacts you just bring up getting a drink together at the place and let him set the date and time, and if he doesn't and says he's busy, tell him to get a hold of you when he's free and leave it at that.
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  14. #44
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    I also want to add women need to do more than just show up to keep a man interested. So many times I’ve had to explain I don’t want to see someone again and the reason was lack of engagement and they are simply boring. I was still a gentleman and drove them home and maybe a hug but women need to make a better effort sometimes.
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  15. #45
    Registered User jebrooks1988's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dolvioblue View Post
    I also want to add women need to do more than just show up to keep a man interested. So many times I’ve had to explain I don’t want to see someone again and the reason was lack of engagement and they are simply boring. I was still a gentleman and drove them home and maybe a hug but women need to make a better effort sometimes.
    How can a woman be more engaging?
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  16. #46
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    Originally Posted by jebrooks1988 View Post
    How can a woman be more engaging?
    Ask him specific questions. Ask his opinion on things. Zuck his Dink. Touch him often. Eye contact. Give your opinion on things. Find out what he does for fun.

    Pretty simple honestly.
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  17. #47
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    I'm pretty sure I've dated and banged more than anyone here but T529( crack whores) and Leoslsyer. OP, if you like him text him, I prefer calls bc they actually pick up or don't. None of this crap in your head. Straight up ask him if he wants to see you and vice versa, you are being an idiot letting time rot sesy as you do mental gymnastics in your head. Call him up or don't..choice is yours ****.
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  18. #48
    Registered User dolvioblue's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by jebrooks1988 View Post
    How can a woman be more engaging?

    Fair question. What makes a guy seem engaged? It’s how he talks to you, his eyes, his expressions, etc. Women want to be loved for who they are so show men who you are. Be fun, sarcastic, lively and well read also.

    The biggest thing is to be present in the moment. Phone away, ex’s buried and balance the conversation between you both. Men love to tell you how great they are so capitalize those moments. When I used to date and a woman was telling me about her new job or a mark she received on a final I would always make her feel important and accomplished for sharing this. Such as “wow, sounds like all that hard work paid off”. I would say this in a way which would (I think) make someone feel valued for things they have going on in their life and use it to talk about them. People enjoy others being interested in what they are.

    So... here’s some advice. Call this guy one day, ask how his day is going and ask if he wants to meet up for pizza someplace. I think this shows you are interested and capable of making a move also. It’s subtle and could be a great night.

    Men have always had to be the ones doing all the anxious work about when to call, not call or to even bother calling. Thank feminism for changing the dating landscape

    Good luck you make your move and if it’s not right with this guy, someone else will appreciate this type of woman.
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  19. #49
    Here's beer Mr Beer's Avatar
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    Can't believe this dumb bish is still going 'but what if this? but what if that?' like a hamster on a wheel. Just ask him out FFS or get on with your life, God women are fkn morons sometimes.
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  20. #50
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    Originally Posted by NitrogenWidget View Post
    I wouldn't say that.
    It does seem like she wants him to chase her and well, if he is as successful as she claims, i'm willing to bet there are other women chasing him and he would rather go the route.
    just a guess but because of all the mishaps, it left time for him to go out with other women and he may of found one he liked but still went out with OP and decided he wasn't into her anymore.

    Instead of posting about it and letting him fade away OP should just ask him out.

    You don’t think too much time has passed to ask him out?
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  21. #51
    Registered User TrueTruth's Avatar
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    brb princess-wannabe OP sits in her castle all day expecting men to make all the moves and hard work. If you want to make something happen then stop acting like some entitled sack of sh!t and make a move yourself. It's much easier for a girl to do this because a guy will never give you a harsh rejection.
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  22. #52
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    Originally Posted by TrueTruth View Post
    brb princess-wannabe OP sits in her castle all day expecting men to make all the moves and hard work. If you want to make something happen then stop acting like some entitled sack of sh!t and make a move yourself. It's much easier for a girl to do this because a guy will never give you a harsh rejection.

    Has a woman ever asked you out after things have fizzled out and you accept? Doubt it. That’s why I’m hesitant to reach out?
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    This is cringeworthy, just ask him out like every one said and you’ll get your answer.
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    If you are as annoying as you are in this thread I can see why he wouldn't be interested anymore
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    I think I did something similar over the weekend, Chatting with this girl on FB.. We went out for drinks.. She was cool, things went well enough but I just was not super attracted. I told her at the end of the date I'd see what she was up to later.. and at the time I fully intended to.. Then later came around and said I would do it the next day. I never have gotten back to her lol. I figured if she reaches out we will go out again. If not im totally cool with that too.
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    Originally Posted by MyronGainzzyz View Post
    I think I did something similar over the weekend, Chatting with this girl on FB.. We went out for drinks.. She was cool, things went well enough but I just was not super attracted. I told her at the end of the date I'd see what she was up to later.. and at the time I fully intended to.. Then later came around and said I would do it the next day. I never have gotten back to her lol. I figured if she reaches out we will go out again. If not im totally cool with that too.
    Were you not physically attracted to her or objectively she was attractive but just no sparks?

    Yea, this guy did contact me after though and said he enjoyed spending time with me during the date and mentioned twice about seeing each other again.
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    Originally Posted by Cloudburn View Post
    If you are as annoying as you are in this thread I can see why he wouldn't be interested anymore
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    who cares he's a rich guy that owns his own business just keep talking to him
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    Originally Posted by Mr Beer View Post
    Can't believe this dumb bish is still going 'but what if this? but what if that?' like a hamster on a wheel. Just ask him out FFS or get on with your life, God women are fkn morons sometimes.
    yeah it goes like this: the guy is a turtle, playing things slow, not going for what he's after, and taking his sweet time courting her.

    the girl, having had plenty of experience, wonders why he isnt moving faster, and starts overthinking things, and thinking of all the value he's providing.

    either 1) he gets up to speed, and suddenly the girl wants to take things slow or says something like "im not that kinda girl." or much more likely, 2) some other guy moves faster, treats her like nothing, and the girl just.. disappears.

    truth be told he's made so many mistakes already, why would that confuse a sloot like OP?? there's no attraction for you, so there's no attraction for him. sounds like he literally psyched himself out and decided it's not worth it lol. now OP is wondering where her little nest egg went!

    when you take it slow, the reaction is always this: whoa, i better play this safe, can't lose this one.

    Originally Posted by jebrooks1988 View Post
    Were you not physically attracted to her or objectively she was attractive but just no sparks?

    Yea, this guy did contact me after though and said he enjoyed spending time with me during the date and mentioned twice about seeing each other again.
    sounds like something i would do if i was low on confidence with a woman. gauge your interest. and if there wasn't anything there, then oh well, on to the next one.

    since you're not going to show any interest and you've treated him like garbage up until this point, ignoring him on purpose etc., he's done. it's called auto-rejection.

    Originally Posted by DaddysGotANew45 View Post
    You're saying the same thing in every response....

    These are MEN telling you from a man's perspective what could possibly be the case

    Who cares about the why's he not doing what you think he should be doing, there's no rule book to saying for ****s sake

    How about you bring up the second date or the restaurant place and see if he asks you

    Or I mean just ask him yourself

    Or ask him why he hasn't asked you and get a direct answer
    playing it safe. can't lose the cash cow. gotta secure the bag. lol. 99% chance they met in a work setting or social circle or some other "safe" place where word can get around.
    Last edited by JGats; 03-11-2020 at 02:59 AM.
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