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  1. #31
    Catbrah LinuxJon's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TBO1313 View Post
    LOL where do we begin?

    OPs wife is allergic to cats and he keeps 9 of them in the house

    OP has a problem with impulse buying fine watches and firearms

    OP let his car get repossessed

    OP let his electricity get cut off playing too fast and loose with the grace period

    OP works in insurance so is probably worth much more dead than alive (very common in the industry)

    OP has some sort of undiagnosed mental illness that leads him to not be repulsed by living in squalor



    Honestly if OP was married to my wife he'd have been dead years ago. His wife must be a saint


    Or this could be the unstudied terminal stage of toxoplasmosis
    I suppose most of this is accurate. I have about 14x income in life ins, so that's probably not great. Maybe I'll chance the beneficiary to a cat sanctuary today just in case.
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  2. #32
    Russian bot keyboardworkout's Avatar
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  3. #33
    Registered User BraneyGumble's Avatar
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    It was the Chinese government.
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  4. #34
    Devil's advocate GreatOldOne's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    I'm not trying to have my mind controlled by big brother
    It's not too late to get one. It won't control your mind.

    That said. My boss worked for the CIA and he refuses, refuses...to get a flu shot.
    (oO) That is not dead which can eternal lie,
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  5. #35
    I hump you like camel? 401Delta's Avatar
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    My girlfriend tried to kill me by poisoning me, I'm almost positive.

    I had these raised horizontal ridges on my toe nails because of it, which is the telltale way of indicating that you were poisoned.

    I think toe nails only grow like a mm per month or something, so it's pretty easy to establish the time period that you were poisoned.

    Have you confronted your wife about this? Maybe you could talk to her and just ask her not to poison you.

    Also, pics of wife?
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  6. #36
    Never Registered TBO1313's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    I suppose most of this is accurate. I have about 14x income in life ins, so that's probably not great. Maybe I'll chance the beneficiary to a cat sanctuary today just in case.
    Nothing wrong with being overinsured if you have a family to think about. Maybe put it in a trust for your kid to take over once he/she turns 18 or 21 instead of the cat sanctuary if your really worried about your wife offing you.
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  7. #37
    Registered User BrunotheBoxer's Avatar
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    Could be a tape worm. Or aids.
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  8. #38
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  9. #39
    Welcome to Wendy's ZyraThornrise's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by keyboardworkout View Post
    Toxoplasma gondii
    This would explain a whole lot about CatBrah, tbh.

    When I was diagnosed with schizophrenia I was tested for this because the symptoms can emulate mental illness.
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  10. #40
    Catbrah LinuxJon's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TBO1313 View Post
    Nothing wrong with being overinsured if you have a family to think about. Maybe put it in a trust for your kid to take over once he/she turns 18 or 21 instead of the cat sanctuary if your really worried about your wife offing you.
    I'm definitely doing the trust. Maybe will leave enough directly to her just to pay off the mortgage.

    Assuming I survive I was going to write the rest of the ins to get to 20x income before the end of the year.

    I wish we had a variable U.L. product. The traditional ones are a joke but I know there are some companies I'd actually consider a VUL from.
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  11. #41
    Registered User snailsrus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    I suppose most of this is accurate. I have about 14x income in life ins, so that's probably not great. Maybe I'll chance the beneficiary to a cat sanctuary today just in case.
    Get a divorce? And write a living will for the child to be the sole beneficiary
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  12. #42
    Never Registered TBO1313's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    I'm definitely doing the trust. Maybe will leave enough directly to her just to pay off the mortgage.

    Assuming I survive I was going to write the rest of the ins to get to 20x income before the end of the year.

    I wish we had a variable U.L. product. The traditional ones are a joke but I know there are some companies I'd actually consider a VUL from.
    I know a lot of people talk chit on UL and will tell you term life and invest the difference into some type of money market account but I agree that there are some good VUL products out there or at least there were back when I was in the life insurance business. Not everyone wants to keep up with multiple investment accounts as well as life insurance
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  13. #43
    Catbrah LinuxJon's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TBO1313 View Post
    I know a lot of people talk chit on UL and will tell you term life and invest the difference into some type of money market account but I agree that there are some good VUL products out there or at least there were back when I was in the life insurance business. Not everyone wants to keep up with multiple investment accounts as well as life insurance
    Yeah agreed. ULs mostly get a bad wrap because of how poor of product they are if you only fund them enough to basically cover the cost of the insurance each month. Plus how chitty the basic products with Allstate, State Farm, etc are structured.
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  14. #44
    Throbbing Member jamalfudge's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    Went to bed last night feeling fine.

    Woke up at 3am so cold I couldn't get warm with 3 layers of blankets (I usually sleep hot).

    Got out of bed this morning and am so weak I could barely get laundry out of the dryer. Still so weak driving to work was hard. Still freezing even though I'm wearing a hoodie at my desk.

    Zero normal cold symptoms. No sinus issues. No cough. No stomach issues. Just freezing and weak. Temp was 97.1 this morning.

    I never get sick without a runny nose and sinus stuff. This is weird AF.
    I came down with Lyme and this was my biggest symptom right off the bat. Extreme chills, then followed by big fever, felt like I had a sore throat but no sinus symptoms.
    Authorities said...best leave it...unsolved
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  15. #45
    Registered User bristol83's Avatar
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    I have an idea that will keep you warm catbrah...

    ...set your hair on fire.
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  16. #46
    Red NerdyLady's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BrunotheBoxer View Post
    Could be a tape worm. Or aids.
    The tapeworm getting around on Misc
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  17. #47
    Red NerdyLady's Avatar
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    If you end up not dying off this sudden onset illness, and you seriously suspect your wife is poisoning you, I'd suggest you maybe want to think about possibly leaving a situation where you suspect your spouse of wanting you six feet under. Just an idea to mull over.
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  18. #48
    Registered User CementPizza's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by NerdyLady View Post
    If you end up not dying off this sudden onset illness, and you seriously suspect your wife is poisoning you, I'd suggest you maybe want to think about possibly leaving a situation where you suspect your spouse of wanting you six feet under. Just an idea to mull over.

    I don't know why she would care too much. Doesn't he live in a shack outside in the back of the house?
    Besides she married him knowing that he was a crazy cat lady and had his squalor on.
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  19. #49
    Here's beer Mr Beer's Avatar
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    You probably have the flu or something similar but if your go-to explanation for feeling unwell is that your wife is poisoning you, you may want to rethink your living arrangements. Either you are paranoid or she has a major personality disorder, either way I'd say that your marriage is dead in the water.
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    Originally Posted by CementPizza View Post
    I don't know why she would care too much. Doesn't he live in a shack outside in the back of the house?
    Besides she married him knowing that he was a crazy cat lady and had his squalor on.
    Every few posts, OP think his spouse is going to kill him because *insert latest expense*. I'm sure that's all TIC, though.
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    Registered User CementPizza's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by NerdyLady View Post
    Every few posts, OP think his spouse is going to kill him because *insert latest expense*. I'm sure that's all TIC, though.
    Yeah, most likely.
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    You probably got parasites from sharing your food with your cat you degenerate.
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    Originally Posted by johnnyboi123 View Post
    Based on your threads recently, you need to get out of this marriage no matter the financial consequences. There's obviously no trust there, irreversible damage has already been done, it's a lost cause.
    haven't read your threads but

    if you think maybe, it's obviously time to leave her.
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    Registered User PowersKenny's Avatar
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    Sounds like antifreeze toxicity, I watch ID channel so I'm kinda an expert, do you have antifreeze in your catshack?
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  25. #55
    Redheaded Stepchild RedRusty's Avatar
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    I've also heard Toxic Shock Syndrome starts out like this.
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    My farts don't smell aleeboy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LinuxJon View Post
    She hates me and I have over $1m life ins
    Change your beneficiary, bro.

    Srs.

    It's actually more common than you think. Females can actually research, procure and execute their plans when they really want to do something.
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    Registered User bigdownunder's Avatar
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    The round Earth conspiracy society usually poisons people when they get too close to the truth. Sorry OP, some secrets are just too important.
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    Catbrah LinuxJon's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mr Beer View Post
    You probably have the flu or something similar but if your go-to explanation for feeling unwell is that your wife is poisoning you, you may want to rethink your living arrangements. Either you are paranoid or she has a major personality disorder, either way I'd say that your marriage is dead in the water.
    I mean it's like... under a 30% chance I think that's what she did. But it isn't outside the realm of possibilities.
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    Throbbing Member jamalfudge's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by RedRusty View Post
    I've also heard Toxic Shock Syndrome starts out like this.
    Lol
    Authorities said...best leave it...unsolved
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    An abundance of toxins in the cat piss all over your squalid domicile
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