37 Looking for advice. Please help

[joshua74133]

Hey everyone.
Looking for some advice, maybe a slap on the hand for what I'm doing wrong, either way I'm trying to get my routine fixed so I don't feel like I'm wasting my time at the gym.

Some back story, I just recently went through a divorce because I caught my wife having an affair, cant say I honestly blame her... I mean my once boxing physique turned into a big pile of fat ass, now here I am single father of 3 boys and I'm focused on making my boys proud of their daddy.

when I got married I was 175lbs solid muscle
Divorced weight 315lbs
Weight now 225lbs

My workout routine has been all cardio.
I do the stair machine at a pace of 12 to 14 for 25 minutes, I then jump on the elliptical and do a level 12 for 10 to 15 minutes, then jump on the treadmill and Jog for 10 to 15 minutes. My goal is to burn 1k calories.

My diet has been keto for the majority of my weight loss but here recently (if im being honest) every other week ive been drinking with the buddies which ends up being Friday, Saturday and Sunday event and has led to bad eating of bar food on those days, you would think my body could shake that 3 days off but damn if I'm not slowly gaining weight... So I know I need to stop

Gym wise.
if I'm being honest I'm dadgum board with my routine, I do it 5 to 6 days a week, same thing everyday, I haven't lifted weights in over 4 years because I fell off a building that kinda messed up my shoulders but I'm ready to try lifting again.
I honestly could care less of abs but I would love to build my chest and arms that I once had.

I need some advice on a new routine.
Should I do more weight 3x10 push until fail.
Or less weight 3x20 push until fail

How do I add pics?

[willybrokeback]

First, congratulations on your weight loss. That is an area I struggle in, so I am always impressed by people who drop significant weight. As far as weight training goes, I would look at some of the routines in the section named for that, such as Fierce 5, Strong-lifts and what-not. In general, if you are getting stronger, you are going to get bigger and more toned. You may change things up later to fine-tune them to exactly what you want, but learning the big compound lifts give you the most bang for your buck IMHO. You do not need to fail on every set of every rep. Focus on steady progression, getting stronger, doing the lifts properly and things will progress from there.

Good luck.

[drudixon]

An affair is never justified, period. Get your mind right, then your body will follow.

[shaneinga]

If you are in a gym pick a good beginners routine and run it for about 6 to 8 months. Fierce 5 in the sticky at the workout programs part of this forum is a good place to start.

The biggest mistake people make in the gym is not progressively overloading their weights and not eating with a goal in mind. Get stronger, eat to your goal, train with intensity, and get adequate sleep and allow time to recover. Do those things and you are pretty much guaranteed to have results.

[Jdizzlean]

An affair is never justified, period. Get your mind right, then your body will follow.

you gotta lay off the drinking period, the bar snacks will follow. you know it already, but even 1 day of that destroys everything you did during the week. that doesn't mean you can't go out w/ the boys, but make better decisions. have an iced tea, drink water instead. you can still socialize w/o the booze. i dropped booze cold turkey beginning of august and am staying off it until next august entirely. you can do anything you set your mind to, you just have to set it to the things that matter to you.

all cardio is great for dropping weight, but muscle is needed to maintain that. otherwise as soon as you get off the treadmill, the weight will flood back. do some kind of weight training, even if it's 65lbs bench presses (which is what i do right now on the incline press...) get past the fear of looking like a weakling in front of everyone else at the gym and just start somewhere. if you never start, you'll never get better.

above all, you have to do it for yourself. the other reasons are important, but you have to come first or you'll never stick to it no matter what.

[tblodg15]

The biggest mistake people make in the gym is not progressively overloading their weights and not eating with a goal in mind. Get stronger, eat to your goal, train with intensity, and get adequate sleep and allow time to recover. Do those things and you are pretty much guaranteed to have results.

That’s some great advice! If everyone would follow that along with being consistent there would be a lot more people satisfied with their results.

[esterocker]

Hey man, keep your head up.
Lay off the alcohol, weight train, get your eating in check, cardio at end of workouts and get plenty of sleep and you will feel like a different person.
Your boys need a healthy dad who will be around for a long time!