Some people are so lost they don't know where self-improvement begins because they don't know what their goals are and thus can't define it.
I had a period when I was single where i was obsessed with "self-improvement" and being "productive" but was very self-aware and knew what it meant to me.
For example, i still went out a lot because quality time with friends was important to me as was working on my social skills/flirting skills. I just managed my time to a tee and spent very little time watching TV/doing things that didn't make me feel motivated.
|
-
09-24-2019, 09:11 AM #421
-
09-24-2019, 09:36 AM #422
-
09-24-2019, 12:06 PM #423
-
09-24-2019, 12:13 PM #424
Well I wouldn't say that. I know I'm better than when I was 2 to 10 years ago. I view myself highly and I don't give a fuk about what other people think. I think I'm smarter, better looking and more wiser and educated too along with more laid back. I'm at my heaviest weight yet (220 lbs) and a lot more women have been coming on to me and not only that but doing me favors even without me asking for it. Better in terms of physique and intelligence...yes. Plus my conversation skills are a lot better than they were years ago.
-
-
09-24-2019, 12:18 PM #425
Well you should get smarter and wiser just by time alone, most people can say that. And in general men gain value with age as well so getting more women isnt shocking.
To me, if you have a job you like, you have friends, you're healthy and have hobbies you like, what more are you supposed to do? It is a crime to like what you've got instead of this constant need for so-called improvement? I feel like its a very american thing to always feel like there's something wrong with you you gotta fix
-
09-24-2019, 12:30 PM #426
-
09-24-2019, 12:53 PM #427
-
09-24-2019, 01:36 PM #428
-
-
09-24-2019, 01:40 PM #429
-
09-24-2019, 02:09 PM #430
-
09-24-2019, 02:35 PM #431
I'm not talking about reading "random s*** on the net." You're right, reading stuff that's basically filler and of little value is not going to improve you. However, reading books and articles on worldly topics, or philosophical ideas, or economic theories, will enrich you in terms of your understanding of the world, which can then lead to self-reflection and help you better understand your own experiences and life outcomes. That type of internal process does improve you mentally and emotionally.
-
09-24-2019, 03:32 PM #432
idk man, i just wanna be good at things i am not good at and interested in. in the future, i'd like to try stand up comedy, making music, doing different styles of lifting, cooking, etc. i dont do these things because i feel an undying urge to "improve," but because they interest me presently and i think it would be cool to learn about them. self improvement is dumb if there is no passion behind whichever particular thing youre starting to do IMO.
-
-
09-24-2019, 03:43 PM #433
-
09-24-2019, 03:59 PM #434
-
09-24-2019, 04:03 PM #435
I see, that makes more sense but then I think its a mistermed. That's not really "self-improvement", more like self actualization where you're just pursuing the life you want.
I have a gripe in general with the notion of self-improvement, because to me it suggests there must be something wrong with you or you're not good enough as you are. and I dont think thats the healthiest way to view things, especially if you're just an average joe blow trying to get by in life like we all pretty much are
-
09-25-2019, 12:12 PM #436
Self-improvement is a cultural concept. We live in a consumerist society that is very much concerned with “improving one’s lot in life’”, and we also live in a individualistic narcissistic society where everyone is mostly only looking out for themselves. I think the combination of these two sets of values has given rise to the concept of “self improvement”.
Like yourself, I think the idea of self-actualisation is healthier.
-
-
09-25-2019, 08:28 PM #437
so i just got back from a bumble date. she was really hot. much hotter than her pics. like a reverse catfish. anyway, we had pizza and drank different ciders and stuff. it was pretty neat. walked her to her car and kissed for a little bit. i think she likes me. however i get the vibe that i probably wont hear from her much, since shes really hot and on apps so she probably has a ton of dudes chasing her. but it was fun and it was great spending time with a beautiful woman who can talk, was interested in me and my hobbies, and who was very open herself. definitely was a nice time and i'm glad she was so easy to schedule with.
zookeeper girl is hit and miss with messaging. might have to let that one go, or at least stop caring. it's hard to with her. she provides the challenge i sort of like.
class girl is free tomorrow night, still deciding if i wanna go. meh.
going to NJ this weekend to see friends and gamble in atlantic city.
-
09-25-2019, 11:01 PM #438
-
09-26-2019, 05:53 AM #439
-
09-26-2019, 06:09 AM #440
-
-
09-26-2019, 06:21 AM #441
-
09-26-2019, 06:23 AM #442
-
09-26-2019, 06:28 AM #443
-
09-26-2019, 06:29 AM #444
thanks my dude, honestly i dont think i am doing anything special, i am just trying to engage them in conversation and set up plans and let my presence and irl skills do the rest, but it really isn't too hard. sometimes it's weird too, gotta be able to think quickly, and i've spent 28 years failing at this lmao so lots of practice.
-
-
09-26-2019, 06:31 AM #445
yeah im not trying to do that, ive come to expect it from most of these girls now. even one i went out with two weeks ago that i documented here, she said she would text me, waited a while, and then hit me with the "busy a lot" thing after i asked her to hang again. i'm not sure what is really happening with a few of these girls who demonstrate interest, we kiss, and then it's like they flip the script instantly or its as if they just wanted something to do that day. which is so strange to me, it makes me question why I am even feeding into the game.
-
09-26-2019, 06:45 AM #446
-
09-26-2019, 07:13 AM #447
-
09-26-2019, 09:24 AM #448
-
-
09-26-2019, 09:41 AM #449
-
09-26-2019, 01:22 PM #450
Bookmarks