Ditch gym and personal trainer?

[enoonami]

Hi. Just a quick question, I won't take up much time. I've been working with a Personal Trainer for the last few months. I've had great results, lost about 40 pounds. I really enjoy her company and I like working with her. I also appreciate her encouragement and drive to push me and kick when I need it. Today, however, things kind of crossed the line.

The gym is family owned and they are really nice people. One of the other trainers injured himself so my sessions have been coupled with another persons which is fine, I don't really need a baby sitter, just a set of instructions and a plan. That has been somewhat of an annoyance but I've been totally cool about it. Today, however, she was the only one at the gym and as the session began someone walked in to sign up after I was finished with my warm ups. She asked me to get on the treadmill for a few minutes.

I wasn't really feeling the treadmill so I started a routine that we've done pretty regularly on this day, 3 sets of 15, biceps, triceps, overhead pullover, and pull-downs. She walks over to me and says "I thought I told you to get on the treadmill". I was thinking "well, I didn't pay for personal training to get on a treadmill, I can do that on my own any time" but I said "I thought this would be more intense and part of our normal routine anyway". She then starts chastising me in front of everyone.

I was turning red with embarrassment but I did everything I could to just smile and keep my ego in check. We start to do some things on the mat and about 5 minutes into it, I just couldn't do it. I was embarrassed and just kept thinking to myself "these people who I know at the gym, who have seen me in there for months, must think I have no respect for myself to let someone talk to me like that."

Finally, I just said my shoulder was hurting and I left. I went to another gym and worked out for an hour. Wound up doing 3 sets of 15 mentioned above, some goblet carries, kettlebell swings, kettle bell pulls, kettle bell rows,
press and lifts, and some single leg presses since I've had some knee problems and I'm trying to strengthen it.

I thought to myself "you know, I've really learned a lot from her". And I really enjoy working out with her too.

I appreciate her being tough on me. But I'm really embarrassed, so much so that I'm not if I want to go back.

Your thoughts?

[oldandintheway]

Leave, go to another gym. She’s in the service industry not a drill sergeant

[Duplicitous]

You're paying her. There's no reason why you should have to tolerate being embarrassed. Just move on.

[etet1919]

This bad experience with a BAD trainer has nothing to do with ' keeping your ego in check.' SHE should be ashamed of the way she treated you, her valued client! Run the hell out of that gym....

BTW, Congratulations on your weight loss and fitness achievements. Remember, when you move on, that YOUR resilience was responsible for this...

[backinthegymbro]

Once you know how every exercise goes, what training routine to follow, why are you still paying someone to count your reps?
Seems like a waste of money imo, unless you have money to burn.

Youtube is full of videos, this forum is full of routines and the possibility to ask questions etc. I think a personal trainer is obsolete, and if you do want one, they're only good for the beginning until they taught you how to train and after that it's a waste.

[KyleAaron]

I've been working with a Personal Trainer for the last few months. I've had great results, lost about 40 pounds. [...] I'm really embarrassed, so much so that I'm not if I want to go back.

Your thoughts?

Sounds like your personal trainer is better at the trainer than the personal part. This could possibly be sorted out by actually talking to her, rather than tossing out questions to anonymous strangers online.

"I've got great results, I'm thinking of quitting." Consider this carefully.

As for "you have the info, you can do it yourself", in principle that's true. But 70% of the Western world is overweight or obese, and they all have access to the internet. This suggests that people need something other than a few articles and YouTube videos.

[etet1919]

See, we can easily tell Sir Kyle has a lot of patience and reasoning...and he'd be a terrific PT, especially for enoonami!

It very likely can be worked out if that trainer is willing to listen, is empathetic and learns how to multitask better under certain conditions. It's possible she became flustered trying to juggle everything- a potential new client or sale for the family business, taking on another trainer's client on the fly, trying to sort out what was best for enoo at that moment...She wasn't accustomed to be alone there.

But if enoo tells her how embarrassed she made him feel (I don't excuse her behavior due to work stress), and in the near future she still talks to him like that...she won't change her personality. Empathetic interpersonal skills are an important integral part of the success of the client, trainer AND family business involved.

[Garage Rat]

A couple things here.
You pay for one on one right?
So if someone else is added to your session then thats wrong or you should be getting a reduced rate.
No one should be training with you if thats how it was worked out in the first place.
A trainer should never embarrass or belittle the client and if someone else came in ask them to wait or come back later you are in a session.
Thats disrespectful to you.
You can only be so understanding.
You are paying for the session and the trainer needs to realize that.
They are in your service.
The other thing as a student/client you should be learning from your trainer so eventually you can use what you learned on your own unless you need someone to be help accountable to so you train consistently.
I would let her go and if you have it in you tell her why with what you explained above.
Move on use what you learned and maybe get a new trainer if need be.
Do your research on that person if you do.
Not all trainers are created equal.
Good luck.

[GravityLee]

Whenever I have a conflict I try to look at “what is their intention?”. Was it to just belittle you out of pure ego trip and scumbaggery? Or as another person said did she feel overwhelmed and flustered? At the end of the day though you pay them to help you. Im on the fence about it. Before deciding think first about whether you need that added value to achieve your goals and also why did she behave that way.

[xsquid99]

I would have a 1 on 1 heart to heart with your PT and just tell them exactly what you told us here. If she is apologetic and understands where you're coming from then stay, if not then you can move on. Tell her straight up that she embarrassed you in front of the other patrons and you're not paying money to a PT to get on a treadmill nor be publicly berated.

I'm not sure why people these days are hesitant to confront people and tell them how they feel, that way she can avoid doing it to you again and possibly doing it to another client in a future situation.

[Ronin4help]

Trust me, no one is watching you guys train because no one cares. The only issue is with your personality type and what benefits a hired professional would provide you personally. Some people need a rough drill sergeant type to promote motivation and to keep them focused, while others prefer a more nurturing and patient type. Clearly, her training style doesn't suit your needs. Therefore, you can now go find another trainer who you now understand will fit your clientele needs. When you seek a new trainer, you at least now know which questions to ask during the initial 'interview' session.