Can't figure out guy friend :(

[jay283]

So I have this friend. We text often and talk about a lot of stuff. But over the past month, he's gotten dismissive, doesn't want to talk as much. He also avoids hanging out, he straight out says no. The past few weeks he has taken to avoiding hugging me when we meet which hurts my feelings a lot. I'm not sure what I did wrong. He also said he doesn't want to hang out because he's only comfortable hanging out with just a handful of people he knows (thereby indirectly saying I' not one of those people).

That makes me feel bad as I really was hoping he and I would be good friends. But when I bring up the not hanging out thing he gets upset and says I'm overreacting. Recently I decided to cut ties and told him so and he's mad about it. He thinks I'm being ridiculous. I don't understand why he's upset when he doesn't even want to hang out with me. I mean if he happens to meet me somewhere he just talks for 3 minutes and then says he has somewhere to be.

It seems like he doesn't truly consider me a friend which is why I find it odd that he gets upset when I decide to cut ties or when I hold off on texting for say a week. Texting by the way is often started by me and he usually ends it by saying he's working on something.

He also got upset that I disliked him no longer hugging me and he says I'm starting to nag him as if I'm his girlfriend. He also says I shouldn't get so upset at stuff he does and that I seem too attached.

Any thoughts on the matter?

Edit: I'm drawn to him because he has a sweet side, he's looking up scholarships for me and when I was in a tight spot he offered to give me some money (I've loaned him some before, but he wanted to give about 900 bucks). I'm just very confused by him to be honest.

[Japankrazy]

Just cruising through, but it seems to me if you have someone in your life who detracts from it or makes you feel a certain way and they won't listen to you or care how you feel and might even knowingly or unknowingly (benefit of the doubt) undermine your feelings but still be unwilling to listen or provide any help then you really don't need to make them a big part of your life.

If I was you I wouldn't invest my emotions into this person. A friendship is a kind of relationship, whilst it can be effortless there are times it's important for both parties to make an effort.

Anyways IDK if that helps at all but put yourself first especially since you've brought up your concerns to him like any civilised person would do and it seems like he's just brushing it under the rug. I'm not saying don't be his friend like if he needs help or messages you, message back or try to help but definitely don't give him as much power over you and your emotions.

Okay end my rant haha let us know how it all goes with him, I wish you luck!

[PLANETGETLOW]

Nice first post troll!!!! ^^

My advice, if you feel you’re support is needed, support from a distance and just fall back for a bit.

[pondus_levo]

Guys have no interest in being just friends with women long term.

[Japankrazy]

Haha thaaaaaanks, didn't think anyone would call me out on that!

[DCSpartan]

Guys have no interest in being just friends with women long term.

Unless they are grown up.