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  1. #8071
    brb Acquiring gains InsanePain11's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by BlackScorpio91 View Post
    You gotta strike when the iron is hot, if you don't, they're gonna feel rejected and ghost your ass. I had to learn that the hard way. Now when a woman is being sexually aggressive/flirtatious online, I take advantage of it.

    I also noticed when my place is clean that I tend to be more confident not only online but irl too cause you never know if a woman wants to hook up on the same day.

    Plus I've had women reply back to me after several days to weeks after I sent them a message, just be patient and focus on other women. But alot of times a woman will reply back asap but sometimes **** does happen and if it's another man in her life, so be it. That guy could turn out to be lame and she can get back to you.
    Yea good points brah. Agree on capitalizing when she is sending signals, otherwise opportunity can slip away. Also fair about being a bit more patient for responses. It's understandable that not everyone will check their app too often.
    Originally Posted by Luc1fer View Post
    It's over 2 years since I went NC with my ex. I think I've actually reached the point where I could talk about her or look at a picture without a strong gut wrenching emotional reaction.

    The first 6 months were brutal. I couldn't stop thinking about her, waking up with sweats, crying randomly, forcibly distracting my thoughts, being constantly reminded of her. I couldn't really date properly without this heavy comparison. I think what made that even worse is knowing that she 'moved on' super quick to new guys (I slipped once and checked her IG, BIG MISTAKE).

    A year in, and I had to ask my Mom not to bring her up since it brought back bad emotions.

    Now, 2 years in, I might go a day or two without thinking about her. And feel okay thinking about history.

    Honestly, the entire ordeal is kinda brutal but I knew that when I ended it; decided that accepting a heavy short term pain was better than a (probable) long term one if I stayed.
    Brah, I hear you big time on this. Brutal indeed. Had a six+ year relationship come to a close just about 1.5 years ago. She could have been the one but things got f'd up and it wasn't in the cards. I felt I had to end it even though I still loved her. She was crushed also and moved out of state for school. She got another boyfriend pretty quick there, and I saw some pics and comments on Facebook--which literally burned into my brain, you can't unsee that. Fuked me up for months and months. Was just like you said, waking up with my heart racing, thinking about doing crazy things to get back at her, or to get back with her (none would have been good). Been trying so hard to snap out of it but only very recently making progress at all in my head. I got in the best shape I've ever been, but I need to do more mental work. Been reading a good book that's helped. For the whole past year and a half I couldn't stop thinking about all the negative thoughts over and over, and really had no idea how to ever get positive again. Things are finally starting to clear up a bit in my head as I continue to work on myself. I did the same thing, asked friends/family not to bring her up since it made me feel dead inside. Stay up brah and keep looking forward.
    Originally Posted by fishnbrah View Post
    I still think of my first love from 15 years ago. I hooked up with her like 4 years ago. She ended up having a baby 9 months later but she said it’s her mans baby
    oh lawd
    Originally Posted by trickfinger View Post
    Last night I went on my first date post breakup. Had a really good time, lots of shared interests, we both grew up in the same area and in general there was a good vibe during the date.
    The problem is... how the fuk do I stop comparing this girl to my ex? I just can't help it, I start looking at very little things and think to myself "well, my ex was different here". I'm afraid I'll fuk this up because of this, the constant comparisons are playing tricks on my brain
    Like others have said, this is normal and it will pass. Try your best to give other girls a chance, even though it might feel impossible for a while. There is no certain timeline that you'll know it will get better, but it definitely will if you work on it.
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  2. #8072
    Registered User Austin317's Avatar
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    I went out with a female friend yesterday to a restaurant (legit just a friend) and she brought a friend along that I didn’t know was happening until we got there. Got speaking to this girl she was pretty hot, don’t think she was interested BUT if this was 8 years ago I’d have freaked out and left the restaurant lol. It’s good to be able to look back at progress you’ve made with life in terms of confidence and your social capabilities. 20 year old me would have been super proud.

    On another note I just washed my car and phuk me I don’t know where you guys are but I’m in the uk and it’s so hot I’ve had to come inside the house and lay down before I finish it off. I haven’t got this type of cardio in the heat lol
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  3. #8073
    Registered User spadelexus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by brightbrah View Post
    What % of girls would you say don't use apps?
    Last year, I ran into these 2 drunk girls one saturday night as it was getting late. I randomly started talking to them. this is in a college bar area so easy to start conversations. It was a girl and her friend, fortunately the friend didn't cockblock me.
    I'd guess over 50% of single women aged 18-29 have used/are using a dating app. Match group probably releases this type of data I'm sure it's out there somewhere so can just guestimate what the market potential is for females who don't use apps. Harder to define use since if an 22yo girl downloaded tinder 2 years ago for the first time and a week later she met her boyfriend, and has been off the market since where does she get counted?

    It's actually a pretty depressing business model if you think about it they make more money the more single people there are.


    Long story short, got the girl's #, texted her next morning and she did indeed remember me, went out the following friday or saturday night. Brought her back to mine, smashed but it wasn't great due to whiskey dink/nervousness. (hey, at least I admit it unlike most miscers)

    At one point I asked her if she used dating apps. She said no, and when i asked why not she basically said that there's too many unknowns/the guys might be creepers or whatever (I'm paraphrasing)
    Assuming she was being truthful, I wonder how many girls fall into this category? I know your situation is somewhat unique in which the girls you are after (at least to hookup with) are younger, so it's very possible that they download the app simply to go hop on a daddy's dink. Especially the ones in sororities who basically have unlimited options within their own network with zero need to find guys online.
    Then there's girls who are looking for entertainment, validation, etc...with no intention of meeting anyone on the apps.

    But yeah one of the good things about the apps for everyone is it increases the size of the pool, so if you have a small social circle, or even no social circle you can still meet people.

    College girls may want to experience older guys or they want to match the kid they have a crush on who sits in the first row of her philosophy class, but he's too pussy to say hi to her. The whole match only people you like thing changed the game.


    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    Yeah too bad it only works if you are at least 7+ at dem facial gainz or have money, but better both.
    Tho if you have it you don't need any game. You just sayin "hey girl let's have a drink at my place."

    You know what success rate i got with that approach? 1% from few hundreds samples. And i'm not even bad looking, creepy, stupid or broke. Just not good enough.

    Tell me again how ez i got it pls
    How do you measure success? Match to smash rate? If so I'm probably just as successful as you. I fail with 98-99 out of 100 matches.
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  4. #8074
    Registered User spadelexus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by NorseMan95 View Post
    Honestly not sure if it is bad or just bizarre, but I love the story so here we go.



    Met this girl via Tinder, call her D, for coffee one day. We hit it off but both had some awkward jitters. We had plans to see each other the next weekend but in the middle of the week she called me late at night, almost three AM. When I saw it was a girl I had met on tinder just once I guessed it was a booty call. So I answered it and tried to play it cool. She goes "Hey what are you up to tonight?"

    I tried to be casual and said "No much, just hanging out, relaxin" pretending I wasn't asleep 45 seconds beforehand.

    I was super wrong about the intentions of the phone call. D says "I am about to go to the emergency room and don't want to go alone, will you come with me?"

    Remember, I am out of it, so I said yes. I drove to her apartment and picked up her and her roommate (surprise) and headed to the ER. D's roommate was the one who needed medical attention because her appendix had burst as we found out later. I stayed there with them half shell shocked and half genuinely interested in what was happening. Around 5 AM her roommate was being examined and I had to ask the number one question on my mind. "How many people did you call before you called me?"

    She looked at me and said "Oh you're the first person I called, I figured you would say yes."

    Had no clue what to make of that so I half laughed it off, and after we realized her roommate would be staying in the hospital I took D home.



    I never heard from her again. Total ghost in the wind after that night.



    Not expecting so many people to read this and enjoy it. Tinder sucks balls.
    I don't know weather you are a fool or a saint but either way you did something to help someone who needed it so good for you. You will be rewarded in the afterlife.
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  5. #8075
    Registered User fishnbrah's Avatar
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    Swiped right on everything and got no matches.
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  6. #8076
    Misc's Supreme BMW Driver brightbrah's Avatar
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    I'm officially on an app "cleanse" for now.

    Last week, this chick was super eager to talk and asked me to hangout rather quickly after I got the #... so, I acted on my instincts and mentioned that I'm not religious and she's like "yeah that probably won't work then"
    wtf is wrong with these girls? I was about to waste hours of my life getting ready, going to the bar, parking, money on my drink....only to find out we're "not compatible" due to religion, and she didn't even mention it. It's something you're not going to change somebody's mind on, so you might as well rip that bandaid off immediately.

    I learned my lesson on that one a while back. If it's too good to be true (they're super eagar to hang out), then it usually is.
    A couple of years ago, I hung out with this girl and she waited until before 2nd date to tell me that she's saving herself for marriage.
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  7. #8077
    🅳🅰🆂 🅸🆃 Luc1fer's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by InsanePain11 View Post
    Brah, I hear you big time on this. Brutal indeed. Had a six+ year relationship come to a close just about 1.5 years ago. She could have been the one but things got f'd up and it wasn't in the cards. I felt I had to end it even though I still loved her. She was crushed also and moved out of state for school. She got another boyfriend pretty quick there, and I saw some pics and comments on Facebook--which literally burned into my brain, you can't unsee that. Fuked me up for months and months. Was just like you said, waking up with my heart racing, thinking about doing crazy things to get back at her, or to get back with her (none would have been good). Been trying so hard to snap out of it but only very recently making progress at all in my head. I got in the best shape I've ever been, but I need to do more mental work. Been reading a good book that's helped. For the whole past year and a half I couldn't stop thinking about all the negative thoughts over and over, and really had no idea how to ever get positive again. Things are finally starting to clear up a bit in my head as I continue to work on myself. I did the same thing, asked friends/family not to bring her up since it made me feel dead inside. Stay up brah and keep looking forward.
    Thank you, it's good to know others go through the same stuff.
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  8. #8078
    Registered User Austin317's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by brightbrah View Post
    I'm officially on an app "cleanse" for now.

    Last week, this chick was super eager to talk and asked me to hangout rather quickly after I got the #... so, I acted on my instincts and mentioned that I'm not religious and she's like "yeah that probably won't work then"
    wtf is wrong with these girls? I was about to waste hours of my life getting ready, going to the bar, parking, money on my drink....only to find out we're "not compatible" due to religion, and she didn't even mention it. It's something you're not going to change somebody's mind on, so you might as well rip that bandaid off immediately.

    I learned my lesson on that one a while back. If it's too good to be true (they're super eagar to hang out), then it usually is.
    A couple of years ago, I hung out with this girl and she waited until before 2nd date to tell me that she's saving herself for marriage.
    Think I’m going to do the same my man. The last few weeks I have nearly been obsessing over it. Constantly on it checking for matches, people to swipe on etc. That’s no way to live.

    To add to that aswell I’m also in the middle of growing my hair, currently look like Patrick Bateman and all of my pictures are of me with a fade so I don’t want to end up catfishing people because right now I just don’t look good lol. Maybe a few months off at the least.
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  9. #8079
    Registered User randomuser12345's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by spadelexus View Post
    How do you measure success? Match to smash rate? If so I'm probably just as successful as you. I fail with 98-99 out of 100 matches.
    More like date to smash. Cos i assume girl that agrees to meet up should be already physicaly attracted to me.

    But now honestly i'm on so huge (4 or 5 in a row) 1st date = last date streak that i just want to know wtf is wrong. I'm not even pushing for sex or even mention it on a date, what is going so wrong that they can decide in a 1-2 hours that they don't want to speak to me ever again?! That **** makes me depressed for realz.
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  10. #8080
    Registered User spadelexus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    More like date to smash. Cos i assume girl that agrees to meet up should be already physicaly attracted to me.

    But now honestly i'm on so huge (4 or 5 in a row) 1st date = last date streak that i just want to know wtf is wrong. I'm not even pushing for sex or even mention it on a date, what is going so wrong that they can decide in a 1-2 hours that they don't want to speak to me ever again?! That **** makes me depressed for realz.
    Are you trying to kiss them at the end?

    It's obviously your irl game if you have such a bad date to smash rate. Russian girls are probably a little more conservative than American girls but ghosting like that is something else. I'd expect they'd make you wait longer but you aren't even getting a chance. Are you an easy going guy? Like not complaining, not having a straight face, etc...you set the tone of the date based on your vibe. You control the set. And you want it to be positive and upbeat. Funny/fun, smiling, etc...

    Also you want to ask her questions, get her to open up to you, on a friendly level. Control the convo but don't hog the stage/cut her off etc...(problem I have a lot)....

    Then you want to flirt and use kino. Google kino if you don't know what it is...

    To recap:
    1. Be upbeat, easy going, don't take any thing serious.
    2. Control everything. From where she sits to where you meet, to when you leave. Not in a weird way causing tension, but like in a CEO10k/day boss way. Control the convo. Subject matter, etc..
    3. Flirt and use kino (total must do or shell friend zone you)
    4. Go for the kiss - it's up to you. Based on the girl / vibe. It can make them wonder if you like them or might be too soon.

    But if you are fun to be around, flirt and use kino there's literally no way a girl wouldn't want to move to the next date unless you didn't vibe at all which happens, very infrequently.

    After you get all that chit down then you need to practice conversation topics that will get them horny. And how to transition them in. While doing kino. That's how you smash on date 1, when it's not an obvious hookup situation. Takes practice. Guys that don't pull think it's all about the face. Guys who do pull know when they phuck up on a date, and it ain't because you suddenly became ugly
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    Registered User randomuser12345's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by spadelexus View Post
    Are you trying to kiss them at the end?

    It's obviously your irl game if you have such a bad date to smash rate. Russian girls are probably a little more conservative than American girls but ghosting like that is something else. I'd expect they'd make you wait longer but you aren't even getting a chance. Are you an easy going guy? Like not complaining, not having a straight face, etc...you set the tone of the date based on your vibe. You control the set. And you want it to be positive and upbeat. Funny/fun, smiling, etc...

    Also you want to ask her questions, get her to open up to you, on a friendly level. Control the convo but don't hog the stage/cut her off etc...(problem I have a lot)....

    Then you want to flirt and use kino. Google kino if you don't know what it is...

    To recap:
    1. Be upbeat, easy going, don't take any thing serious.
    2. Control everything. From where she sits to where you meet, to when you leave. Not in a weird way causing tension, but like in a CEO10k/day boss way. Control the convo. Subject matter, etc..
    3. Flirt and use kino (total must do or shell friend zone you)
    4. Go for the kiss - it's up to you. Based on the girl / vibe. It can make them wonder if you like them or might be too soon.

    But if you are fun to be around, flirt and use kino there's literally no way a girl wouldn't want to move to the next date unless you didn't vibe at all which happens, very infrequently.

    After you get all that chit down then you need to practice conversation topics that will get them horny. And how to transition them in. While doing kino. That's how you smash on date 1, when it's not an obvious hookup situation. Takes practice. Guys that don't pull think it's all about the face. Guys who do pull know when they phuck up on a date, and it ain't because you suddenly became ugly
    I hear you. Weird thing that i have experience. ~50+ dates is something i think. And i thought i already can feel girls vibe. I had dates that i knew were last and that few was nothing like that. Girls weren't tense or in a hurry to leave, they were laughing and talking their mouth off. 2 of them i kissed goodby. And then were ghosted. That's what confuses me the most.
    Like i can swear everyting were at least alright.
    Well just get 2 date agreement form another one on a sunday. If she's gonna ghost too i don't even know what to think. Prolly gonna start to look for my prictures with sign "STAY OUT! SERIAL KILLER!" on the internet
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  12. #8082
    Registered User spadelexus's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    I hear you. Weird thing that i have experience. ~50+ dates is something i think. And i thought i already can feel girls vibe. I had dates that i knew were last and that few was nothing like that. Girls weren't tense or in a hurry to leave, they were laughing and talking their mouth off. 2 of them i kissed goodby. And then were ghosted. That's what confuses me the most.
    Like i can swear everyting were at least alright.
    Well just get 2 date agreement form another one on a sunday. If she's gonna ghost too i don't even know what to think. Prolly gonna start to look for my prictures with sign "STAY OUT! SERIAL KILLER!" on the internet
    Most of what I wrote boils down to confidence. It's hard to keep failing and keeping your head up but it's the only way to succeed. You have to will it. Like I play what is going to happen in my head before the date. Visualize yourself winning.

    Also maybe scale down a couple notches to less attractive women. Just to practice.
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  13. #8083
    Registered User musclemagik's Avatar
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    I just got out of a 2 year relationship that seemed like it was going to be the one. i met her parents, we talked about marriage/kids and moving in together. In the end I guess I was deluding myself, there were a lot of things we weren't compatible on and she definitely didnt show me the same loyalty or affection i showed her, but I ignored all that because i wanted it to work out

    It's been two weeks and I think i'm mostly over it. I got back on tinder/bumble/hinge and maybe that was a mistake because when I see nothing but nasty 38 year old sloots I start panicking thinking I screwd up my last chance with a decent girl

    I heard from people that now is a golden time for online dating since everyones quarantined but i'm not seeing it. My profile is the same exact one that used to get me a date every day of the week, but im struggling just to get matches now.

    it's tough bros. The few dates i've been on have been disappointing and it makes me think back to my last girl and my heart starts racing and i panic again. anyone else know the feel?
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    Originally Posted by musclemagik View Post
    I just got out of a 2 year relationship that seemed like it was going to be the one. i met her parents, we talked about marriage/kids and moving in together. In the end I guess I was deluding myself, there were a lot of things we weren't compatible on and she definitely didnt show me the same loyalty or affection i showed her, but I ignored all that because i wanted it to work out

    It's been two weeks and I think i'm mostly over it. I got back on tinder/bumble/hinge and maybe that was a mistake because when I see nothing but nasty 38 year old sloots I start panicking thinking I screwd up my last chance with a decent girl

    I heard from people that now is a golden time for online dating since everyones quarantined but i'm not seeing it. My profile is the same exact one that used to get me a date every day of the week, but im struggling just to get matches now.

    it's tough bros. The few dates i've been on have been disappointing and it makes me think back to my last girl and my heart starts racing and i panic again. anyone else know the feel?
    There's no way you're over this in 2 weeks. I went into a minor panick mode too because I was the same age as you when we broke up and I had anxiety about never finding another girl. I had set up a vision in my head of living happily ever after with her.

    By now my entire mentality has changed and I'm not even as attached to the whole marriage, kids, white picket fence vision. If you asked me 10 years ago I'd have told you I'd be married with kids by now. But I'm totally fine and putting it off for another 5+ years.

    If I was a woman I'd be in a very different mode of course. I think women often drive/manipulate men into thinking they should be rushed too.
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    Misc's Supreme BMW Driver brightbrah's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by musclemagik View Post
    I heard from people that now is a golden time for online dating since everyones quarantined but i'm not seeing it. My profile is the same exact one that used to get me a date every day of the week, but im struggling just to get matches now.
    that was the case 2-3 months ago. now that everything is opened back up, it's slowed down online. this is part of the reason i'm taking a breather right now.
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    Originally Posted by musclemagik View Post
    I just got out of a 2 year relationship that seemed like it was going to be the one. i met her parents, we talked about marriage/kids and moving in together. In the end I guess I was deluding myself, there were a lot of things we weren't compatible on and she definitely didnt show me the same loyalty or affection i showed her, but I ignored all that because i wanted it to work out

    It's been two weeks and I think i'm mostly over it. I got back on tinder/bumble/hinge and maybe that was a mistake because when I see nothing but nasty 38 year old sloots I start panicking thinking I screwd up my last chance with a decent girl

    I heard from people that now is a golden time for online dating since everyones quarantined but i'm not seeing it. My profile is the same exact one that used to get me a date every day of the week, but im struggling just to get matches now.

    it's tough bros. The few dates i've been on have been disappointing and it makes me think back to my last girl and my heart starts racing and i panic again. anyone else know the feel?
    Same thing with me (4 year relationship). Still not really over it almost a year later, and initially had a lot of panic that that was my chance with a good girl. It'll take time to get over it. I still haven't been on any dates that made me feel the same way either...it sucks

    Now is a particularly bad time too for single brahs, it's fuked up right now...but we're all gonna make it brahs
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    I hear you. Weird thing that i have experience. ~50+ dates is something i think. And i thought i already can feel girls vibe. I had dates that i knew were last and that few was nothing like that. Girls weren't tense or in a hurry to leave, they were laughing and talking their mouth off. 2 of them i kissed goodby. And then were ghosted. That's what confuses me the most.
    Like i can swear everyting were at least alright.
    Well just get 2 date agreement form another one on a sunday. If she's gonna ghost too i don't even know what to think. Prolly gonna start to look for my prictures with sign "STAY OUT! SERIAL KILLER!" on the internet
    It can be frustrating at times and hard to keep your head up.

    Hell, im about to take a break myself since either girls are extremely flaky or my game is way off.

    My last 2 dates went really well but they ended up never responding afterwards.

    1. Went hiking, had great conversation, joking and laughing the whole time. Ended with her hugging and kissing me. (never responded to next text)

    2. Meet up at a bar/grill, she actually looked like her pics! Good convo, joking around and laughing, kissed at the end. (never heard from again)

    Im also 44 and dating women in ranges of 35-45. I dont think age matters at all in how these girls act, so dont ever think that older will mean less games and bs.
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    Originally Posted by brightbrah View Post
    that was the case 2-3 months ago. now that everything is opened back up, it's slowed down online. this is part of the reason i'm taking a breather right now.
    April and October seem to be the best times for getting on them.

    Ya know, the nesting times..
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    Misc's Supreme BMW Driver brightbrah's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by redliner9 View Post
    April and October seem to be the best times for getting on them.

    Ya know, the nesting times..
    Yes. In retrospect, I've gotten the most action in January-March up here in the Great White North. Conveniently, Vday also falls in those months

    Originally Posted by redliner9 View Post
    Im also 44 and dating women in ranges of 35-45. I dont think age matters at all in how these girls act, so dont ever think that older will mean less games and bs.
    I wonder if it's because they're in such a rush to get into marriage. 26 is about my limit, seems like the 28+ish crowd acts like they have the "marriage cloud" looming over their heads. I don't really want to date a girl older than me anyway.
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    Originally Posted by Austin317 View Post
    Think I’m going to do the same my man. The last few weeks I have nearly been obsessing over it. Constantly on it checking for matches, people to swipe on etc. That’s no way to live.

    To add to that aswell I’m also in the middle of growing my hair, currently look like Patrick Bateman and all of my pictures are of me with a fade so I don’t want to end up catfishing people because right now I just don’t look good lol. Maybe a few months off at the least.
    Everyone has chitty hair now, thanks to the pandemic.
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  21. #8091
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    I’m going to join the cleanse crew for a bit. Tinder has been great for me recently but some broad gave me the clap last week. Started smashing them around the same time so just cut them all off.

    Stopped working out so going to focus on that And self improvement until bars open up and then go back to bars/tinder.
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    Misc's Supreme BMW Driver brightbrah's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by newbuck View Post
    I’m going to join the cleanse crew for a bit. Tinder has been great for me recently but some broad gave me the clap last week. Started smashing them around the same time so just cut them all off.

    Stopped working out so going to focus on that And self improvement until bars open up and then go back to bars/tinder.
    Ouch, well, could be worse man. That's a risk we take, I guess.
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  23. #8093
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    Aaaaaand another girl ghosted me. "sry, father goes on a business trip tommorow". Guess she didn't know about that 2 days ago. And no alternative date obviously. fml
    like 5th girl in a row and 10th+ if not count 1 that i smashed in between.
    so freaking done with dating
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    Originally Posted by newbuck View Post
    I’m going to join the cleanse crew for a bit. Tinder has been great for me recently but some broad gave me the clap last week. Started smashing them around the same time so just cut them all off.

    Stopped working out so going to focus on that And self improvement until bars open up and then go back to bars/tinder.
    seems everyone’s going on a cleanse but tbf dating takes away from self improvement
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    Aaaaaand another girl ghosted me. "sry, father goes on a business trip tommorow". Guess she didn't know about that 2 days ago. And no alternative date obviously. fml
    like 5th girl in a row and 10th+ if not count 1 that i smashed between.
    that’s flaking, not ghosting. I have been rarely flaked on in nyc but i’m dating down. (i have been ghosted though) One thing that helps prevent flaking is do a video date beforehand, i did early on and one of the sloots who i ended up smashing said it helped her be a lot more comfortable to go out during covid after meeting via video first
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    Originally Posted by spazzin View Post
    that’s flaking, not ghosting. I have been rarely flaked on in nyc but i’m dating down. (i have been ghosted though) One thing that helps prevent flaking is do a video date beforehand, i did early on and one of the sloots who i ended up smashing said it helped her be a lot more comfortable to go out during covid after meeting via video first
    yeah mixed up words.
    It should have been our 2 date.
    I can't get a second date for the life of me lately.
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    **** Love, I Want Cash. BlackScorpio91's Avatar
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    I'm not on an app cleanse but haven't been using the apps as much though I'll probably start again soon.
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  28. #8098
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    Originally Posted by randomuser12345 View Post
    yeah mixed up words.
    It should have been our 2 date.
    I can't get a second date for the life of me lately.
    what kind of first dates are u going for? drinks? coffee? dinner?

    i stick to drinks
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  29. #8099
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    Spazzzzzzin whuddup? Still killin it with the ladies?

    I've been on a dating app cleanse too. Been about six weeks. I was gonna download them this weekend but saw a couple of recent photos of myself and was honestly horrified. Bloatmaxxed to hell haha, just...no. I don't get it, I look at myself in the mirror not bad, but in these photos no thanks jefe. Does that happen to you guys? I know lighting /angles play a role but dayum. Even though I manage to pull pretty well on the apps. Also wondering if maybe I'm picking photos of myself that make me look better than I really am. Of the last five girls I went out with, two of them ghosted me after what I thought were good first dates. Could be because they were disappointed with what I looked like IRL. Wasn't wild about either of them, but no response surprised me b/c I thought the dates went well. The other three I went out with multiple times.

    Funny story about an awkward af experience last night:

    I play soccer in a group and there's this Brazilian girl who is really good (mentioned her in previous posts). I invited her to practice, just the two of us and she was really into it. I wasn't planning on pursuing her because there's a massive age gap (she's 15+ years younger) and I don't want to fuk up the team dynamic. I'm encouraging her to try to get a soccer scholarship -- IN b4 mentoring comments :-). At the end of practicing, we're saying goodbye and she brings up a restaurant that she wants to try. My buddy had mentioned it to her and said we should all go after one of our games. I say sure, that's sounds like fun. I was thinking it would be a group of us since she often brings friends to the game who watch her play. She says she wants to go Friday (this was on Wed) since she will be going out of town for two weeks. I say uhh not much notice but ok. She gets all excited and gives me a long extended hug. However she is very friendly/touchy with everyone too (typical Brazilian), so who knows where her head's at. I let my buddy know since it was his idea and he says just the two of us should go. I say no, it'll be a group of us, it'll be fun. She texts me Thursday to confirm/check in, I say we're on and she says how much she's looking forward to it. Friday morning she asks me if my buddy is coming too and I say yes. Now, I'm thinking the obvious implication is that she will bring a friend or two, but I don't mention this to her. It's obviously not a date.

    So I get there a couple of minutes late and both of them are already there. There's no one else. It's me, my buddy, and this girl. We proceed to eat dinner and it was fine on the surface but internally I'm just going WTF the whole time. Also, I should point out my buddy mogs me in every which way. Generally I have better game but that's about it, he has looks, money, status etc. Races cars, has a couple of Porsches one of which he drove there fml haha. Lexus RC350 crew here. We finish eating, she gets in her car and I talk to my buddy, we're laughing at this point and I apologize for not having clarified she should bring friends. Me and the amigo part ways, and once I get in my car I notice she hasn't left yet. I shoot her a text asking if she wants to come back to mine and she tells me she just made plans to meet up with one of her girlfriends before she heads out of town. I give her thumbs up emoji and head back home. She texted a photo of us later that night and thanked me for coming. I didn't respond to either. Oh, and she's an Au Pair so has/makes no money and she paid for her own meal, which I didn't think about in the moment but my buddy was like that's kinda messed up because the $$ was nothing to us.

    So yeah it was just a total cringe/fuk up/beta/cuck night. At this point I don't know if she is interested in him, me, or neither. If I ever had a chance I probably blew it cockblocking myself. I'll take a shot when she gets back into town and if I get rejected (quite likely) then I'll encourage my buddy to take a swing. It's weird, he has hang ups about rejection -- I kind of have to push him on this stuff. Without rejection, you never know how much you can achieve, you know? If you only went out with girls who were automatic yeses, you're selling yourself short. For you younger guys, the more rejection you can experience the better. Eventually it doesn't even faze you. It's 1000x better to be interested in a girl, ask her out and say no VS developing these bizarre oneitis crushes that waste literally months/years of your life. Just get it over with and move on before you establish any emotional attachment. Like anyone will take my advice after the above story haha...

    Anyhow yes I'm feeling like chit bout myself, but this is rocket fuel motivation which honestly is awesome. I've been cruising along for too long in easy mode, taking what I could get, etc. Time to self improvemaxx and practice delayed gratification. Not gonna let myself back on the apps until I hit a goal weight. It's worth it, we all gonna make it brahs.
    Last edited by HangingChad; 08-15-2020 at 06:09 PM.
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  30. #8100
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    Originally Posted by HangingChad View Post
    Spazzzzzzin whuddup? Still killin it?

    I've been on a dating app cleanse too. Been about six weeks. I was gonna download them this weekend but saw a couple of recent photos of myself and was honestly horrified. Bloatmaxxed to hell haha, just...no. I don't get it, I look at myself in the mirror not bad, but in these photos no thanks jefe. Does that happen to you guys? I know lighting /angles play a role but dayum. Even though I manage to pull pretty well on the apps. Also wondering if maybe I'm picking photos of myself that make me look better than I really am. Of the last five girls I went out with, two of them ghosted me after what I thought were good first dates. Could be because they were disappointed with what I looked like IRL. Wasn't wild about either of them, but no response surprised me b/c I thought the dates went well. The other three I went out with multiple times.

    Funny story about an awkward af experience last night:

    I play soccer in a group and there's this Brazilian girl who is really good (mentioned her in previous posts). I invited her to practice, just the two of us and she was really into it. I wasn't planning on pursuing her because there's a massive age gap (she's 15+ years younger) and I don't want to fuk up the team dynamic. I'm encouraging her to try to get a soccer scholarship -- IN b4 mentoring comments :-). At the end of practicing, we're saying goodbye and she brings up a restaurant that she wants to try. My buddy had mentioned it to her and said we should all go after one of our games. I say sure, that's sounds like fun. I was thinking it would be a group of us since she often brings friends to the game who watch her play. She says she wants to go Friday (this was on Wed) since she will be going out of town for two weeks. I say uhh not much notice but ok. She gets all excited and gives me a long extended hug. However she is very friendly/touchy with everyone too (typical Brazilian), so who knows where her head's at. I let my buddy know since it was his idea and he says just the two of us should go. I say no, it'll be a group of us, it'll be fun. She texts me Thursday to confirm/check in, I say we're on and she says how much she's looking forward to it. Friday morning she asks me if my buddy is coming too and I say yes. Now, I'm thinking the obvious implication is that she will bring a friend or two, but I don't mention this to her. It's obviously not a date.

    So I get there a couple of minutes late and both of them are already there. There's no one else. It's me, my buddy, and this girl. We proceed to eat dinner and it was fine on the surface but internally I'm just going WTF the whole time. Also, I should point out my buddy mogs me in every which way. Generally I have better game but that's about it, he has looks, money, status etc. Races cars, has a couple of Porsches one of which he drove there fml haha. Lexus RC350 crew here. We finish eating, she gets in her car and I talk to my buddy, we're laughing at this point and I apologize for not having clarified she should bring friends. Me and the amigo part ways, and once I get in my car I notice she hasn't left yet. I shoot her a text asking if she wants to come back to mine and she tells me she just made plans to meet up with one of her girlfriends before she heads out of town. I give her thumbs up emoji and head back home. She texted a photo of us later that night and thanked me for coming. I didn't respond to either. Oh, and she's an Au Pair so has/makes no money and she paid for her own meal, which I didn't think about in the moment but my buddy was like that's kinda messed up because the $$ was nothing to us.

    So yeah it was just a total cringe/fuk up/beta/cuck night. At this point I don't know if she is interested in him, me, or neither. If I ever had a chance I probably blew it cockblocking myself. I'll take a shot when she gets back into town and if I get rejected (quite likely) then I'll encourage my buddy to give it a shot. It's weird, he has hang ups about rejection -- I kind of have to push him on this stuff. Without rejection, you never know how much you can achieve, you know? If you only went out with girls who were automatic yeses, you're selling yourself short. For you younger guys, the more rejection you can experience the better. It's 1000x better to be interested in a girl, ask her out and say no VS developing these bizarre oneitis crushes that waste literally months/years of your life. Just get it over with and move on before you establish any emotional attachment. Like anyone will take my advice after the above story haha...

    Anyhow yes I'm feeling like chit bout myself, but this is rocket fuel motivation which honestly is awesome. I've been cruising along for too long in easy mode, taking what I could get, etc. Time to self improvemaxx practice delayed gratification. It's worth it, we all gonna make it brahs.
    damn long story but worth the read. My pics are mediocre and blurry so i feel that i rarely get ghosted since i look better irl although still happens and as u know it did a couple weeks ago haha. I’ve had one date tell me i look nothing like my pics and that most dudes have chitty blurry pics so i guess it’s not just me. Having said that, i think if you look bloated in the mirror and that you look better in your pics it’s either in your head or you put on 20 pounds since you took your pics.
    So it’s just in your head pal


    Personally i’ve gone on dates where i try to look my best (clean shaven, ate only salads that day, worked out an hour before for pump) and some where i go in feeling like chit (feel like i’m bloated, didn’t shave, etc) and i don’t think i changed much in terms of her perception of how i look based on the results. Like i’m a 5/10 so i’m not gonna drop to a 4 or 3/10 on my worst day or go up to a 6 or 7 on my best day.

    Regarding the soccer chick, personally i think it was a bad move to take buddy who is a good looking friend on a group dinner that could end up as a potential chick u like esp since she ended up going alone since she was confused/didn’t think it through. Either way, not paying for her and that she’s broke/low money may affect your chances if she liked you but i personally wouldn’t have paid for her if it was more than 25 bucks to cover her lol

    Regarding me, i’m doing ok/not bad. Currently have 3 in my lineup, finally got flaked on when trying to re-add a fourth last week but at least she flaked in the morning so not bad
    Positive vibes crew
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