Fat guy question, help

[ironfluff]

First off, I was absolutely mortified to post a picture of myself on here because I hate the way I look, but I'm making efforts to change my body and need real feedback. So please do be honest, I want to do things right.

Basic info about me below:

29 years old
6 foot 3 inches
269 lbs, down from nearly 300 lbs - got married and had a kid, diet went out the window basically.
Been consistently working out/lifting now for 10 months.
Had a sports background (wrestling) in high school but other than that, before I started 10 months ago the only real intensive activity I've had would have been 12ish years ago. I lifted a bit into college but stopped.

I've been SUPER happy with the strength gains I've made since I started. Pretty much all of my lifts exploded about 5 months in when I really started running legitimate programs/splits. My squats lagged a bit due to quadraceps tendonitis, however my squat is still drastically better than it was when I started.

But, IM TIRED OF BEING FAT. I hate the way I look. I'm a bit torn on how to eat because I know you have to eat lots of good nutritious food in order to build muscle. I have by no means been perfect on my diet as I pretty much just started out with the mindset of "I just want to lift heavy ****" so I was only strict on getting enough protein. But now I want to lift heavy AND look better.

From a lot of the things I've read you have to be in a caloric surplus in order to build muscle, but in a caloric deficit in order to lose fat? I know about eating the correct amount of protein and such, its just the caloric side of things I'm confused about.

How am I supposed to eat enough to facilitate good muscle gains while also trying to lose my chub? I want to maintain the strength I've built and continue to add MORE strength, but I would like to lose a lot of my fat in the process.

Maybe I'm asking the impossible. I've learned so much about splits, routines, lifting form and what to do in the gym, I'm just sorely lacking on the nutrition side of things.

TLDR: Do I eat in a plus or a deficit to keep building muscle/strength while trying to get rid of my fat?

Thanks

[gbullock32]

Deficit, aim to lose 1 pound per week, or slightly more. You can gain muscle in a calorie deficit if you train properly (follow a proven program) and are new to lifting or overweight; as you become leaner it will be harder to do this though.

[Vandeman17]

Deficit, aim to lose 1 pound per week, or slightly more. You can gain muscle in a calorie deficit if you train properly (follow a proven program) and are new to lifting or overweight; as you become leaner it will be harder to do this though.

Agreed with this. Eating at a slight deficit while lifting on a good program will do you well. Just don’t rush it and enjoy the process. It will be worth the patience in the end

[cljolley]

I second the top two posts. Looks like you’ve already got a good bit of muscle underneath the padding. You don’t look as bad as your post made it seem. Just train hard following a good program while eating at a moderate deficit and you’ll get there. If you’ve already been training for 10 months and shed a significant amount of fat already then I’d say you’ve got the patience/commitment part down. Good luck!

[CommitmentRulz]

First off, I was absolutely mortified to post a picture of myself on here because I hate the way I look, but I'm making efforts to change my body and need real feedback.

You've already gotten some terrific advice in this thread, so I won't repeat what you've already been told.

I'll address the quoted part... Don't worry about stuff like that. We want to help people who WANT to be helped and will actually listen to advice. You're not so far away. Just work hard, be consistent, and realize that it's a long, slow, but REWARDING process. Good Luck.

[dski79]

You've already gotten some terrific advice in this thread, so I won't repeat what you've already been told.

I'll address the quoted part... Don't worry about stuff like that. We want to help people who WANT to be helped and will actually listen to advice. You're not so far away. Just work hard, be consistent, and realize that it's a long, slow, but REWARDING process. Good Luck.

couldnt agree more!!

[AdamWW]

I would add: try to take a more positive attitude toward yourself, and don't get caught in comparing yourself to others.

I like the quote: "Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to what someone else is today".

This needs to be a lifestyle change, not just revenge against your body. Your body has kept you alive for a long time, no matter how much you 'hate it' for whatever reason.

Make some changes, be patient, everything will work out.

[desslok]

You got some good advice already. But i think you’ll be pleasantly surprised as you lose fat, cause looks like there are some bicep peaks just waiting for the snow to melt... good luck!

[ironfluff]

Thanks everyone for the awesome replies. Its really nice to see a community/forum that isn't full of trolls. Dont get me wrong, I know there here lol, but I was super worried about posting a picture of myself and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

I started eating in a slight deficit as of yesterday and I am going to continue to do so while still training my ass off.

I'm also going to be making a better effort at not constantly comparing myself to others and really focusing on my own progress like some of you said. However, I think one thing that kept me so motivated to work as hard as I can every session was that I was always seeing myself in such a bad light. Its like I'm so concerned about how far I've let myself go that every time i enter the gym, I vow to do my absolute best to change it. But I can also see how this could be a bad thing if taken too far.

I have NO plans of stopping anytime soon, I'm still as excited to go the gym today as I was 10 months ago. Stay motivated!

[Jakeh1]

Thanks everyone for the awesome replies. Its really nice to see a community/forum that isn't full of trolls. Dont get me wrong, I know there here lol, but I was super worried about posting a picture of myself and it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

I started eating in a slight deficit as of yesterday and I am going to continue to do so while still training my ass off.

I'm also going to be making a better effort at not constantly comparing myself to others and really focusing on my own progress like some of you said. However, I think one thing that kept me so motivated to work as hard as I can every session was that I was always seeing myself in such a bad light. Its like I'm so concerned about how far I've let myself go that every time i enter the gym, I vow to do my absolute best to change it. But I can also see how this could be a bad thing if taken too far.

I have NO plans of stopping anytime soon, I'm still as excited to go the gym today as I was 10 months ago. Stay motivated!

Good luck bro. You've definitely got the right mind set and we'll support you where we can!

Keep us updated with your progress!