New and afraid

[pjlangston]

I’m afraid to go to the gym. I weigh 309 pounds and I’m afraid of all the men there making fun of me. What can I do?

[pjlangston]

Also I know it says I’m male on my profile. I am female. I can’t figure out how to change it. Every time I try it takes me to a different page

[glenn1987]

I’m afraid to go to the gym. I weigh 309 pounds and I’m afraid of all the men there making fun of me. What can I do?

think of what they will say if you go every week for the first year?
i love the power of defeating the nay sayers
you will find positive people there as well that could have been your size or bigger and turned there life around by loosing weight.
JUST GO

[BS57]

What matters most to you OP? Getting healthy, or what you "think" others may think of you?

Have you considered they possibly started the same way as you, or maybe even have respect for someone making a change?

Worry about you, forget others.

[pjlangston]

Every time I’ve been, I just get mean stares. I know I’m ugly but I didn’t think I was so ugly that people couldn’t stand to look at me.

[jlsnyderTypeR]

There are good and bad people everywhere, but you will find that more people than you expect will welcome you for taking that first step in bettering yourself!

Do not let that stop you!!

[pjlangston]

Well, you guys are gym rats, how much do you hate seeing a fat unattractive woman in the gym? You’d prefer to see cute skinny women, right?

[jlsnyderTypeR]

Every time I’ve been, I just get mean stares. I know I’m ugly but I didn’t think I was so ugly that people couldn’t stand to look at me.

Do not take that personally......I sometimes look at people that way but it's just because I am focused on my training. NO ONE Deserves that treatment, and it is their problem not yours!

[spradish]

Don't borrow trouble. The vast majority of the people who you see looking at you are just glancing around the room between exercises. They're not giving you mean stares unless it's because you're staring at them long enough for them to wonder what your problem is. Focus on yourself and not what others are doing and certainly stop thinking that you know what is going on in others' brains when they look at you. People are pretty self-centered and for the most part are thinking about themselves, not you, when they see you out in public.

[pjlangston]

I think maybe the weight part of the gym is just for men and hot skinny women, and fatties like me should just stick to doing other things.

[JSim83]

I think maybe the weight part of the gym is just for men and hot skinny women, and fatties like me should just stick to doing other things.

No, it is for everyone. If you want to lift weights, then go lift weights!

[pjlangston]

Are you sure? I feel like as an ugly woman, I just don’t belong. I never see anyone ugly lifting weights.

[JSim83]

Well, you guys are gym rats, how much do you hate seeing a fat unattractive woman in the gym? You’d prefer to see cute skinny women, right?

I don't hate seeing fat women (or men) in the gym. Not one bit. It is the opposite. I think it is great if people are trying to better themselves. Skinny women or fat women in the gym? does not matter at all. I go to gym to work out.

[jlsnyderTypeR]

Well, you guys are gym rats, how much do you hate seeing a fat unattractive woman in the gym? You’d prefer to see cute skinny women, right?

No, most of us do not like skinny gym bunnies! My wife trains with me and is very fit, but she weighs 165 lbs. at 5'5"

I think maybe the weight part of the gym is just for men and hot skinny women, and fatties like me should just stick to doing other things.

You need to train with weights just like anyone else! If you continue with that attitude, then nothing is ever going to change for you! Tough love here, but get over it, train hard and prove them all wrong.

[SunshinyDaiz]

This thread may help you.

https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showt...21&pagenumber=

[spradish]

I'm a formerly obese woman but not a "skinny woman." I encourage all women to lift. It not only helps with your physique (lifting while you lose will help you end up with better visual results than doing only cardio or no exercise at all while you lose) but also helps out in so many other ways. Life is easier when you're stronger. You're less dependent on other people (no need to get somebody to pick stuff up for you.) Your bones are stronger, which helps avoid osteoporosis (osteoporosis-->hip fractures--> increased morbidity, decreased independence.)

You have the option of continuing as you are, which means living the rest of your life being unhealthy overweight and unhappy or making an effort to change those things. I'm not sure how old you are but don't let your fears steer your next 20, 40, 60 years.

[pjlangston]

Being thin doesn’t make you automatically happy, does it?

[ironwill2008]

I’m afraid to go to the gym. I weigh 309 pounds and I’m afraid of all the men there making fun of me.

I've seen this sentiment posts dozens, if not hundreds, of times on this site. And while I can't do anything to change your mind---only you can do that---your perception is inaccurate. The fact of the matter is that the vast majority of those you'll find in gyms/fitness centers are focused on their own training and not what others are doing, or how they look.

Although I own my own private gym, and other than during vacations have been training there exclusively for about the past 19 years, my first 7 years were spent as a member of a half-dozen various gyms over that time, as well as day-rate training in dozens of others. In all that time, in all those gyms, never even one time did I ever witness someone being laughed at or belittled for being in there and working to improve themselves. Not once.

What can I do?

The very same thing everyone else has ever done who is determined to improve their condition---go to the gym and get busy.

[D4GHL]

The amount of times you have put yourself down in such a short amount of time actually makes me think this is a wind up?

If it isn’t you seriously need to look for positives and going to the gym will breed that... those first 10 lbs off give you a kick even though others probably won’t notice... when you lose 30 lbs and people start commenting it hits you harder and you will become addicted.

Honestly don’t see the stares as a bad thing... everyone looks around in between sets / exercises I am not thinking anything I am just looking normally 👍🏻

Good luck and breed that confidence 🤜🏻

[pjlangston]

I just see how ugly and disgusting I am and how perfect that everyone at the gym looks, and I don’t know how I can measure up. I really am ugly. I’m being honest about that. I never have been pretty.

[psilocloud]

Are you sure? I feel like as an ugly woman, I just don’t belong. I never see anyone ugly lifting weights.

People in the gym are so in the zone they usually don't even know what they are looking at. Trust me don't overthink things to much. Just lift weights and get some muscle to burn that fat. Cardio ain't anywhere near as good as bodybuilding. I use to be a fat fuking **** wearing hoodies in 100 degree weather so I been there

[dwightaroundya]

I see fat people all the time at the gym. The only thing I’m concerned about is where are the damn 2.5 weights are!!

[UACK7]

All I can say is that if you truly feel this way about yourself as you keep reiterating, perhaps you should seek some professional help for your image issues. Nothing we can say will change the way you see yourself until you make the choice to see it differently. Life is all about perspective. If you dont like how you look, and want to go to the gym to get in better shape, but wont go to the gym because youre afraid of how strangers will view you and decide to stay the same, it is a vicious cycle that wont go anywhere. If you need to, start at home, buy a workout dvd, build some inner confidence. We all go to the gym and see someone more aesthetic and feel out of place to a degree, but that comes from something deeper than just looks. Work hard, believe in yourself, and dont let anyone get in the way of your own goals.

[glenn1987]

I just see how ugly and disgusting I am and how perfect that everyone at the gym looks, and I don’t know how I can measure up. I really am ugly. I’m being honest about that. I never have been pretty.

When you walk into supermarket do you think of the people staring at you, or when you drive your car, what about when you get pizza on sat night?
Everyone has an opinion just live your life the way you want too?
why spend your life trying to impress those that dont care or dont know you?

[latverian41]

For one you are not ugly ok and for two don't worry about what you look like today only worry about what you will look like 12 months from now.
.
You dobt have to go to a gym. Eat right and walk and crunch your numbers for a year . The weight will come off. Then you can progress

You can do it and you are a very pretty woman

[doza808]

I don't mind seeing people who are overweight in the gym. I actually encourage them along or give them tips. Half of the battle is getting in there and actually doing the work. As said earlier, there are good and bad people in this world. Just know that what you're doing is for you and only you. I admire people going to the gym because mostly, they are in there to work and better themselves. You should be proud when you walk in the gym. I know I'm proud of them when i see them in there. Good luck.

[CommitmentRulz]

OP, people don't spend NEAR as much time looking at and thinking about you as you seem to think they do...

You can post here and whine on and on and on, or you can hit the gym and make a change. Your call.

[BS57]

Troll thread.....someone that "ashamed" of her looks, isn't going to post her pic in an avatar.