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  1. #1
    Registered User Vertigo5891's Avatar
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    Seeing ex's move on, engaged, kids etc

    So my last 3 major ex's over last 10 years, 1st one of 3yrs wanted to fix things/ stay friends but I didnt (did the dirty on me) and moved on got married had a kid etc, i never cared. I was acquainted with new guy and he's cool, good for them.

    2nd one of 3 years i left because i didnt want kids and she eventually did, didnt want to hold her back from that but she didnt want to lose me. Tried staying friends but i had a blow out when she was trying to rub new guy in my face, she barred me and havent spoke in 18 months, just found out she's engaged, kinda throat lump but am happy for her.

    Most recent one of 1yr has moved on with new guy been with for a yr, he's a one dimensional potato and she did the dirty on me too with the most turbulence I've ever dealt with, i dont think she deserves to be happy, mutual friends have told me hes very boring and unadventurous which makes me happy (yes I'm a prick). I see her in person (small town) and there are no feelings from me at all.

    And then there's me. Kinda feel like a shadow, the past, left behind (obviously), and I know its just a matter of me moving forward which I've always done but that doesnt stop me thinking about the past. I've been seeing randoms here and there but my heart is reserved for a girl who I was dating for a while recently who's on the other side of the world atm, and she surpasses everything I couldve ever wanted, and she says likewise. If she were to come to me, which she is planning to, I think I'd marry her. Have had my fun and I would do what i could to help and support her.

    So, how do you lot 'deal' with ex's moving on from you? Do you stay friends? Manageable when new partners come into pic? Cut and run? Thank you and goodbye?
    Last edited by Vertigo5891; 08-31-2018 at 11:18 PM.
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  2. #2
    Registered User _chef_'s Avatar
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    You should move on with your own life too
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  3. #3
    Registered User Deman10's Avatar
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    Like the misc says NC is honestly the best. For me in particular I become disgusted by the girls I crushed hard on and say to my self "really?". Start focusing on yourself, shes not apart of your life or future. Why would you want a chick getting d***ed down by another dude anyway.?
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    Registered User Ninshark's Avatar
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    Should've been working on your own life during those 10 years. Did you get a new job, or promotion, or make a lot of money, improve your social skills, your health since then? If not, I totally see why you are like a shadow that has been left behind. You can start now though, so it won't be a total loss.
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  5. #5
    Is the old 48 47 or 49? Hwy61's Avatar
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    So #1 & #3 cheated on you? And you cut #2 loose so she could pursue kids which you didn't want & she repays your consideration by rubbing her new guy in your face?


    You deal by being thankful you didn't babynames.com those beyotches, got a clean getaway, and....most importantly.....hopefully have refined your tastes in women.
    Them folks that named the Venus Flytrap was tryin' to tell ya'll somethin'....
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  6. #6
    Registered User Coolman468's Avatar
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    Considering I remove my exes from everything, I'll never know what's going on in their lives and see who they are with, nor do I care to. Also work yourself man
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  7. #7
    Registered User sdoo's Avatar
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    How could you know what your ex's are up to when you've gone full NC?

    Oh wait.
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  8. #8
    Banned bretmarathon's Avatar
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    You shouldn't even be in contact with them. That way you won't know what's going on with them.
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    Registered User Legz422's Avatar
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    Unless you have children together, you shouldn't even know what your ex's are up to. Unless you live in that small of a town that it's unavoidable.
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    Stop stalking them and get some hobbies for fuks sake. Don’t you have better chit to do?
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  11. #11
    Registered User jetli12345's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Vertigo5891 View Post
    So my last 3 major ex's over last 10 years, 1st one of 3yrs wanted to fix things/ stay friends but I didnt (did the dirty on me) and moved on got married had a kid etc, i never cared. I was acquainted with new guy and he's cool, good for them.

    2nd one of 3 years i left because i didnt want kids and she eventually did, didnt want to hold her back from that but she didnt want to lose me. Tried staying friends but i had a blow out when she was trying to rub new guy in my face, she barred me and havent spoke in 18 months, just found out she's engaged, kinda throat lump but am happy for her.

    Most recent one of 1yr has moved on with new guy been with for a yr, he's a one dimensional potato and she did the dirty on me too with the most turbulence I've ever dealt with, i dont think she deserves to be happy, mutual friends have told me hes very boring and unadventurous which makes me happy (yes I'm a prick). I see her in person (small town) and there are no feelings from me at all.

    And then there's me. Kinda feel like a shadow, the past, left behind (obviously), and I know its just a matter of me moving forward which I've always done but that doesnt stop me thinking about the past. I've been seeing randoms here and there but my heart is reserved for a girl who I was dating for a while recently who's on the other side of the world atm, and she surpasses everything I couldve ever wanted, and she says likewise. If she were to come to me, which she is planning to, I think I'd marry her. Have had my fun and I would do what i could to help and support her.

    So, how do you lot 'deal' with ex's moving on from you? Do you stay friends? Manageable when new partners come into pic? Cut and run? Thank you and goodbye?

    98% of men out there would cut the relationship but I feel like you have feelings for this person. Staying friends is important, I truly believe in open relationships working and everything happens for a reason. Both of you should figure out what you want before you commit to one person.
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  12. #12
    Manlet with Credentials Jasonw1178's Avatar
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    I'd rather see my ex's moved on and happy than depressed reminiscing on what we had. Yeah you want your ex to miss you and regret it not working but when it actually happens, feelsbadman.

    Otherwise, if you still have feelings for a girl, you need to speak up before she moves on without you.
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  13. #13
    Registered User Vertigo5891's Avatar
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    I am NC with all of them, told the 1st one thankyou and goodbye over a yr ago when she last tried to contact me, my mum is still friends with 2nd one as she's a good girl, and updated me despite me not wanting to know. Told the 3rd one to go **** herself, keeps trying to fake hug me every time we run into each other. Its just reflecting i guess, thinking about it all, what if's, what i learned from them. And as said, I have seen plenty of birds inbetween and one particular girl who surpasses everything i want, its just a waiting game now. And I have done heaps in 10yrs with new jobs, skills, hobbies, experiences etc. Never dwelled to a point where its locked me in my room with a tub of ice cream
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