Matches have pretty much died

[Silencespeaks]

Excuses.

Yeah asking for a spot at a gym of all places is not a really an obvious sign honestly. Everybody does it. Now if you were to ask for a spot from him all the time, that's more obvious but you only did it once so that's your own fault as alot of us guys sometimes misinterpret signs and think a woman is interested in us. Just be more obvious with your signs next time. Come on now, you're damn near 50 and acting like a teenager.

Yeah I'm not saying asking for a spot is by itself an indication of interest. At my old gym I've asked random people for a spot without interest. Just that it was an opening for him to talk to me if he likes me, or any other day that I'm there or when we've shared equipment etc.

[Silencespeaks]

Lol i like you as a poster but thats total bs.

You say that now knowing that you dont have to approach but if you had to approach especially in today climate where everything is "creepy" its not easy at all.

It takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there for rejection.

Think about the guy in your gym... he probably likes that gym spends alot of time in there and has made friends there. Lets say he approaches you and you say no then it becomes awkward for him anytime he sees you. You may also say something to the staff about him being creepy and next thing you know he has been banned from the gym.

Besides there nothing stopping you from approaching guys so why not do it. You dont have to ask them out directly just start a conversation and mention in conversation that you recently broke up with your bf...that should be clue enough that you are single and open to new relationships....but i bet even something like that would be very hard to do.

Gonna be honest with you here Silence, you're typically very self aware. But on this topic you aren't.

We all have things we're irrational about, this is just one of yours.

Yes as a guy I would approach lol. And I actually have approached a guy a couple of years ago before I started thinking about this stuff. Didn't work and now that I've thought it through my position is that if a guy likes you he'll try to talk to you.

[BlackScorpio91]

Thats nothing. My most autistic phase was when i was 19-21, just severe depression for some other **** i had to deal with, but i dealt with my depression by being alone, miscing, and maxing out my physique srs. Was the most awkward, autistic looking chad ever.


This is the worst one: HBB, 9/10 californian looking chick, blonde, tanned, beautiful, perkiest set of natty tits ever, nice and long tanned legs with a bubble but was into me. She asked for my number pretending she wanted my help with some class, called me, i went to her house and helped her with her ****, she got an A on all her tests yet she still kept asking for my help. I would pick her up on my car, drive up to random places to study, go to her friends houses to study and **** like that and would make several moves during the time.

I think she kept her interest for that long because i kept pulling off the miserious, lone wolf good looking guy act, like some dude that just prefered to stay by himself even if he could be slaying bitches like her.


On the final day, she texted me "thank you so much for all your help, seriously, how can i make it up to you?". My answer "dont worry haha, you can give me an apple or something next semester".


Yeah, that was my actual answer. No reply after that, texted her again that afternoon after realizing how big of a stupid ******* i was, and never texted back. That was the last time i talked to her lol.

Wont ever share this story IRL lol. Its unbelievable i know

I had a cute blonde girl in college that I was attracted to from the first day I saw her. We became friendly and she invited me over to help her with her Math, and to sleep over. I slept on the floor.

I had another cute blonde girl in college that I used to help with some coding, she was very attractive. At a college event, she came up and invited me to dance with her. I told her I wanted to finish my drink and maybe we could dance later. She interpreted it as rejection, and I couldn't recover it.

I have many self-sabotage moments like that, all stemming from feeling like I was lacking (sexual) experience from a very young age (~age 12 it started when I felt behind for having never kissed a girl). As I got older it snowballed, and every year that passed by I was embarrassed to reveal my inexperience. Eventually (just a few years ago) I became less self-conscious enough to just say fuk it, but the damage was already done psychologically.

I wish someone had told me back then in my late teens that it was okay and normal to not have had sex. So if any young guys read this, you're good - don't feel embarrassed or ashamed and let it impact you.

One time when I was 19 and in school, I was trying to find this class and I asked a hot, busty blonde chick for directions. She said the class was such and such way. As I was about to leave, she said "WAIT!" and said "I can show you where it is." I was being an idiot "Why you want to walk with me?" and she said "I just want to". So I was like ok and we were walking and talking at the same time, getting to know each other. Eventually after like 10-15 minutes, I got to the area where I wanted to get to and instead of telling her to give me her number, I told her "I was nice talking to you" and shook her hand. She gave me a sad look as I walked away.

A woman who didn't even know me, a total stranger, was willing to walk with me for 10-15 minutes (maybe a mile or two) to show me where my class was and I fuked it up. Lmao. To this day, I still call myself retarded for that. If it was the current me, I would have definitely asked for her number.

[BlackScorpio91]

You took my post far too literally.

Oh I did?

My bad lol, I thought you were actually serious and one of those MGTOW/incel dudes complaining.

There are dudes that actually do say what you say and are serious about it.

[BlackScorpio91]

Yeah I'm not saying asking for a spot is by itself an indication of interest. At my old gym I've asked random people for a spot without interest. Just that it was an opening for him to talk to me if he likes me, or any other day that I'm there or when we've shared equipment etc.

He's probably shy or an introvert like you are. I wouldn't give up that easily. Just be more open around him. If he doesn't get the hint by now then he's either autistic, not interested or has a gf.

[Luc1fer]

He's probably shy or an introvert like you are. I wouldn't give up that easily. Just be more open around him. If he doesn't get the hint by now then he's either autistic, not interested or has a gf.

Ye I think that girl saying I had a nice ass and telling me she didn't have plans on Friday was realistically enough signal.

[BetaThanU]

Don’t know why you guys are so adamant this guy could be interested in SS. I’m pretty sure he’s not.
SS has high standards remember. This is a Chad, he has options and he’s probably not going to put effort in for a 6/10 (self proclaimed)

[Luc1fer]

Don’t know why you guys are so adamant this guy could be interested in SS. I’m pretty sure he’s not.
SS has high standards remember. This is a Chad, he has options and he’s probably not going to put effort in for a 6/10 (self proclaimed)

I don't think anyone is adamant that he's interested. We're saying it's entirely premature to reach that conclusion.

[BetaThanU]

I don't think anyone is adamant that he's interested. We're saying it's entirely premature to reach that conclusion.

I think giving someone an open to chat to you, and they chose not to, is a very reasonable assumption they're not into you.

[Luc1fer]

I think giving someone an open to chat to you, and they chose not to, is a very reasonable assumption they're not into you.

But he has chatted to her. The point here is that she asked for a spot, and now feels like her work is done and she's showed enough interest.

[BetaThanU]

But he has chatted to her. The point here is that she asked for a spot, and now feels like her work is done and she's showed enough interest.

Just that it was an opening for him to talk to me if he likes me, or any other day that I'm there or when we've shared equipment etc.

doesnt sound like its just this one instance of choosing not to talk to her at given opportunities

[Silencespeaks]

I think giving someone an open to chat to you, and they chose not to, is a very reasonable assumption they're not into you.

Right exactly.

[MeliodasK]

Don’t know why you guys are so adamant this guy could be interested in SS. I’m pretty sure he’s not.
SS has high standards remember. This is a Chad, he has options and he’s probably not going to put effort in for a 6/10 (self proclaimed)

Even if he isnt, he could be if he got to know her a little better. Woman needs to stop relying on looks alone and actually try to build attraction with him. Thats what most guys do all the time, why cant she do it?


Asking for a spot is not enough lmao, not for a Chad minding his own business anyway.

[DolphinPilot]

Oh I did?

My bad lol, I thought you were actually serious and one of those MGTOW/incel dudes complaining.

There are dudes that actually do say what you say and are serious about it.

Well it was an exaggeration, but I know there are plenty of other women at the gym who would get upset if they asked for a spot and the guy started flirting with her. Conversely there are women that ask for a spot and assume that's all the hint she needs to give that she wants sum hard d

[Luc1fer]

Even if he isnt, he could be if he got to know her a little better. Woman needs to stop relying on looks alone and actually try to build attraction with him. Thats what most guys do all the time, why cant she do it?

Because women fully rely on their looks, and their looks only. But don't judge them based on their looks.

[Weezy32]

One time when I was 19 and in school, I was trying to find this class and I asked a hot, busty blonde chick for directions. She said the class was such and such way. As I was about to leave, she said "WAIT!" and said "I can show you where it is." I was being an idiot "Why you want to walk with me?" and she said "I just want to". So I was like ok and we were walking and talking at the same time, getting to know each other. Eventually after like 10-15 minutes, I got to the area where I wanted to get to and instead of telling her to give me her number, I told her "I was nice talking to you" and shook her hand. She gave me a sad look as I walked away.

A woman who didn't even know me, a total stranger, was willing to walk with me for 10-15 minutes (maybe a mile or two) to show me where my class was and I fuked it up. Lmao. To this day, I still call myself retarded for that. If it was the current me, I would have definitely asked for her number.

Lol i think we have all been there i had many of these potato moments in my life here is just one and i may post another one later if someones interested


In one of my college classes there was this legit 9.5/10 misc standards girl who would always sit in the front row. I am tall 6'5 average looking and she was also very tall maybe 6'1 perfect face, long legs, beautiful long hair just perfect girl. As soon as i saw her i quickly determined shes way way way out of my league and i had 0 chance. I was sitting in the same row as her but in the back of the class (there was about 6 seats in between us). I am an extrovert so i would talk to alot of people that were sitting near me and made alot of friends. I also would come to class super early like 15-20 mins before class started and she would be there as well...but i would just drop off my bookbag in my seat and just go outside of class to talk on the phone (remember i had determined i had 0 chance w her).

Anyway after doing that 4-5 times she started doing the same thing so it would just be me and her in the hall starring at each other and talking on the phone. Thought that was a bit strange that she start doing the same thing and i also noticed that she kept glancing at me everytime i would come in but even after all that i was like NAHHHH i am just seeing things no way she is way out of my league..

Finally on the last day of class i come in and she is the only one there BUT THIS TIME she is sitting right infront of me and its only me and her in the classroom... I WAS LIKE WTF she had been sitting in the first seat in my row ALL SEMESTER and now she decides to sit in the back ifnront of me. I do my usual where i leave my bookbag and go outside to talk on the phone. I come back in and shes still sitting infront of me but at this point other people are coming in and the people that usually sit around me who i become friends with are coming in and they start talking to me. ALL THIS TIME I AM STILL NOT SAYING ANYTHING TO HER... IDIOT. So she turns around and asks me something about syllabus i smile and answer her she turns back and i continue shooting the **** with people around me (Could have easily said something to her like so you finally decided to sit with all the cool people and start conversation with her but nope EVEN BIGGER IDIOT). After about two minutes I **** YOU NOT SHE LITERALLY SLAMMS HER FOLDER ON THE DESK GETS UP PICKS UP HER BOOKBAG AND MOVES TO HER NORMAL FRONT SEAT. The class starts and thats it... never see her again because it was last day of class.

It only occured to me later on that yes she might have been extremely hot but she was also very tall and there was not many guys that are as tall as her so her dating options very fairly limited and even though i am only average looking i am tall af and pretty cool guy had social status in class.

TBH i still remember her long legs imagine 6'1 girl wearing booty shorts hnggggggg. Fuurk i miss college brahs

[MeliodasK]

Because women fully rely on their looks, and their looks only. But don't judge them based on their looks.

Then they get surprised when the guy that was throwing his dick at her on the first 2 minutes of conversation, does the same to a different chick and ends up cheating. If SS pursued that Chad and the guy ended up getting attracted to her, and eventually getting together, then she could be a bit more confident about him not going out at nights and looking to fuk instawhores while on the gym.



For example right now im looking for a serious partner, and if the girl blows me off a few times at first, then thats fukin perfect. Thats a good sign. If im fuking her at date 1 then im most likely guy #35, and will most likely not be the last one

[MeliodasK]

Lol i think we have all been there i had many of these potato moments in my life here is just one and i may post another one later if someones interested


1) In one of my college classes there was this legit 9.5/10 misc standards girl who would always sit in the front row. I am tall 6'5 average looking and she was also very tall maybe 6'1 perfect face, long legs, beautiful long hair just perfect girl. As soon as i saw her i quickly determined shes way way way out of my league and i had 0 chance. I was sitting in the same row as her but in the back of the class (there was about 6 seats in between us). I am an extrovert so i would talk to alot of people that were sitting near me and made alot of friends. I also would come to class super early like 15-20 mins before class started and she would be there as well...but i would just drop off my bookbag in my seat and just go outside of class to talk on the phone (remember i had determined i had 0 chance w her).

Anyway after doing that 4-5 times she started doing the same thing so it would just be me and her in the hall starring at each other and talking on the phone. Thought that was a bit strange that she start doing the same thing and i also noticed that she kept glancing at me everytime i would come in but even after all that i was like NAHHHH i am just seeing things no way she is way out of my league..

Finally on the last day of class i come in and she is the only one there BUT THIS TIME she is sitting right infront of me and its only me and her in the classroom... I WAS LIKE WTF she had been sitting in the first seat in my row ALL SEMESTER and now she decides to sit in the back ifnront of me. I do my usual where i leave my bookbag and go outside to talk on the phone. I come back in and shes still sitting infront of me but at this point other people are coming in and the people that usually sit around me who i become friends with are coming in and they start talking to me. ALL THIS TIME I AM STILL NOT SAYING ANYTHING TO HER... IDIOT. So she turns around and asks me something about syllabus i smile and answer her she turns back and i continue shooting the **** with people around me (Could have easily said something to her like so you finally decided to sit with all the cool people and start conversation with her but nope EVEN BIGGER IDIOT). After about two minutes I **** YOU NOT SHE LITERALLY SLAMMS HER FOLDER ON THE DESK GETS UP PICKS UP HER BOOKBAG AND MOVES TO THE FRONT SEAT her usual seat. The class starts and thats it... never see her again because it was last day of class.

It only occured to me later on that yes she might have been extremely hot but she was also very tall and there was not many guys that are as tall as her so her dating options very fairly limited and even though i am only average i am tall af and pretty cool guy had social status in class.

TBH i still remember her long legs imagine 6'1 girl wearing booty shorts hnggggggg.

**** man. I fuked up similarly with an oneitis of mine srs.

For 2 years i was legit in love with this woman, i idealized the **** out of her. Was on a few of my classes and honestly id day dream about her, i felt like Lizzie fukin Mcguire on highshool or something lol.

For 2 years i did nothing, we would talk briefly but thats it, and i catch her looking at me and so did she hundreds of times during those years. On the last days of college before the finals, in one of the classes, she sat next to me for the first time, pretended not to have brough her books and asked me if she could join me. She had like 5 or 6 other good friends of hers around her but for some reason she asked me, so i confidently pulled her desk next to mine and studied together that day on class while making jokes with her, laughing, talking, etc. Went great srs, dat day i barely slept. At the end of the class she told me "tomorrow again ok?". This was a super reserved chick, and all of my friends argued for years about why she didnt have a bf or was seen with a man ever, so her telling me that was MASSIVELY out of character.


Next day, the same thing, she asked to study with me on class, spent like 2 hours chatting, talking, laughing, etc... and then we said our goodbyes, we had the final text the very next day, the last day id see her.

She waited for me to come out of the classroom and walked right in front of me watching her phone on the way to the parking lot. I could have asked her for coffee that day, i had the perfect pussy ass excuse, "lets keep studying somewhere". It was the second to last day id see her so even if she rejected me nothing would fukin happen.

I walked behind her for 5 minutes and didnt say a word. Next day i see her on class, talked a bit before the final exam, i finished it before her and decided i would look like a jackass if i waited for her, so i just went home. Mind you i was in love with this girl and in the last 3 days of college, she made the moves i should have made long ago. When i got home, i grabbed the two whoopers i had stopped for at Burger King, and threw them at my window, crying like a sorry piece of ****. Im 100% srs.

I was never so mad with myself as i was that day. Took me weeks to get over it, i couldnt believe i had fuked it up so bad. I was such a fukin pussy OMG lol. That was like 5 years ago, and i still cringe at that moment of my life.


Cried and shouted like a little bitch that day, punched pillows and ****. Like a pregnant 14 year old girl.


Weeks after that i decided to add her on FB, then messaged her. She was cold on her answers, as expected, and that was it. Never saw her again. I loved this woman srs, oneitis doesnt even begin to describe what i felt for this woman.


She lives in my city nowadays but never saw her again. Now that im single again and not a beta BITCH i wish i could run into her.

[eod8989]

This is some bs and idk why you guys are trying to cope on my behalf. Plenty of women get approached all the time and even complain about too many approaches and guys bothering them. Even Ranger said all you have to do as a woman is go outside.

Most men that approach are desperate losers srs. This guy probably isn't so he isn't going to approach you. And if he does you have to have a personality to at a place like the gym otherwise it's going to be awkward.

[eod8989]

The women crying metoo are doing that to guys that are exposing themselves to women, drugging them, raping them, taking advantage of them, groping them, harassing them. Going up to a woman and asking her out is not a bad thing. They're not gonna call the police on you unless you keep being persistent (following her around after she rejects you). Then you're entering the realm of harassment. Most times you're not gonna have the police called on you or have a woman cry "metoo" unless you come off as a creep.

I've approached alot of women and never had the police called on me.

Yes it is. How many men do you see approaching random women with no familiarity? I've been going to the gym for like 15 years and i've only seen it once or twice. It's one thing if you build up a little chemistry first but just straight up cold approaching people is not it bro.

[Weezy32]

**** man. I fuked up similarly with an oneitis of mine srs.

For 2 years i was legit in love with this woman, i idealized the **** out of her. Was on a few of my classes and honestly id day dream about her, i felt like Lizzie fukin Mcguire on highshool or something lol.

For 2 years i did nothing, we would talk briefly but thats it, and i catch her looking at me and so did she hundreds of times during those years. On the last days of college before the finals, in one of the classes, she sat next to me for the first time, pretended not to have brough her books and asked me if she could join me. She had like 5 or 6 other good friends of hers around her but for some reason she asked me, so i confidently pulled her desk next to mine and studied together that day on class while making jokes with her, laughing, talking, etc. Went great srs, dat day i barely slept. At the end of the class she told me "tomorrow again ok?". This was a super reserved chick, and all of my friends argued for years about why she didnt have a bf or was seen with a man ever, so her telling me that was MASSIVELY out of character.


Next day, the same thing, she asked to study with me on class, spent like 2 hours chatting, talking, laughing, etc... and then we said our goodbyes, we had the final text the very next day, the last day id see her.

She waited for me to come out of the classroom and walked right in front of me watching her phone on the way to the parking lot. I could have asked her for coffee that day, i had the perfect pussy ass excuse, "lets keep studying somewhere". It was the second to last day id see her so even if she rejected me nothing would fukin happen.

I walked behind her for 5 minutes and didnt say a word. Next day i see her on class, talked a bit before the final exam, i finished it before her and decided i would look like a jackass if i waited for her, so i just went home. Mind you i was in love with this girl and in the last 3 days of college, she made the moves i should have made long ago. When i got home, i grabbed the two whoopers i had stopped for at Burger King, and threw them at my window, crying like a sorry piece of ****. Im 100% srs.

I was never so mad with myself as i was that day. Took me weeks to get over it, i couldnt believe i had fuked it up so bad. I was such a fukin pussy OMG lol. That was like 5 years ago, and i still cringe at that moment of my life.


Cried and shouted like a little bitch that day, punched pillows and ****. Like a pregnant 14 year old girl.


Weeks after that i decided to add her on FB, then messaged her. She was cold on her answers, as expected, and that was it. Never saw her again. I loved this woman srs, oneitis doesnt even begin to describe what i felt for this woman.


She lives in my city nowadays but never saw her again. Now that im single again and not a beta BITCH i wish i could run into her.

Dman brah i dunno who was bigger potato me or you.

Lol all these clues these girls were giving us and she thinks by asking a guy for spot in the gym he is suppose to know that she is hitting on him. We guys are idiots when it comes to picking up clues.

Yes it is. How many men do you see approaching random women with no familiarity? I've been going to the gym for like 15 years and i've only seen it once or twice. It's one thing if you build up a little chemistry first but just straight up cold approaching people is not it bro.

Yes and lets not forget that at the gym its alot of people that are close to you so if you get rejected many people will see it and will see you as a loser/creep from now on. In most cases its not worth a risk ....honestly you have to really have an IDGAF mindset to go for it.

[zeronotyethero]

Fukk dating apps and them nickel and diming people. Looked at the rates they charge and it's more expensive than match is, which I think is like $30/month.

[Luc1fer]

For example right now im looking for a serious partner, and if the girl blows me off a few times at first, then thats fukin perfect. Thats a good sign. If im fuking her at date 1 then im most likely guy #35, and will most likely not be the last one

Yep, if any girl is down for sex quickly, rest assured she's done it 100 times before. It's cope to think you're unique, nomatter what she tells you.

[Luc1fer]

Fukk dating apps and them nickel and diming people. Looked at the rates they charge and it's more expensive than match is, which I think is like $30/month.

Ye it's crazy man. 4 years ago I paid for Match, but the rest were all completely free apps (ad revenue). Now they all have expensive paid versions, and highly restricted features. I was shocked to see how expensive Bumble Boost etc. are ($15-$20 per month).

[devopsengineer]

How you know they are dead? Did they send you a message saying she is dead?

If she ignores you, does not mean she is dead.

[Silencespeaks]

How you know they are dead? Did they send you a message saying she is dead?

If she ignores you, does not mean she is dead.

You win this thread lol.

[BigTimePlayer]

Yes it is. How many men do you see approaching random women with no familiarity? I've been going to the gym for like 15 years and i've only seen it once or twice. It's one thing if you build up a little chemistry first but just straight up cold approaching people is not it bro.

Yeah, I only seen it happen once at my job but the guy knew someone the girl knew. I never saw anyone else ever randomly approach in my life outside of that.

[SniXSniPe]

Doesn't work for me. I go out every day and I go to the gym 4 days a week but almost never get approached. Almost all my dates have been from online, except two that were set up by mutual acquaintances.

Well, not to be mean, but... do you have a resting bitch face?


Also, guys typically don't hit on women at the gym. Only a few dudes here and there will try to spit game (usually the types of dudes you wouldn't want to date). Even the hottest chicks at my gym don't get approached much at all from what I can tell.

If you're going out, guys in your group will sometimes deter guys from approaching you.

Or maybe, you're just really beautiful and intimidate most men.



Let's just face it, 90% of dudes are pussies to approach these days. You should try it yourself sometime. Guys are generally nice and flattered when they get hit on by a female.

No I think if a guy likes you he'll show interest and try to talk to you, especially after you give an opening like asking for a spot. No reason to ask a guy out because if he doesn't ask you out first it means he's not interested.

That's not true. You'd be surprised how shy most guys are. If asking for a spot was an opener for me to hit on a girl at the gym, then I'm a ****ing blind idiot who misses out. Can't draw a conclusion from that. I've asked for spots from girls who happened to be nearest to me and it wasn't to hit on them

[BlackScorpio91]

Well, not to be mean, but... do you have a resting bitch face?


Also, guys typically don't hit on women at the gym. Only a few dudes here and there will try to spit game (usually the types of dudes you wouldn't want to date). Even the hottest chicks at my gym don't get approached much at all from what I can tell.

If you're going out, guys in your group will sometimes deter guys from approaching you.

Or maybe, you're just really beautiful and intimidate most men.



Let's just face it, 90% of dudes are pussies to approach these days. You should try it yourself sometime. Guys are generally nice and flattered when they get hit on by a female.

Honestly I have to agree with this, I don't see too many guys approaching at the gym I go to or just in general. I normally don't approach in the gym unless the signs are really obvious she likes me as the gym is where I train and go often and I don't really want to waste my time approaching every hot women in the gym. I know people will be watching you and you will be known as the guy going to the gym to pick up chicks. I typically just approach outside the gym.

I've heard of guys getting kicked out of gyms for approaching multiple women at the gym.

[Luc1fer]

This ghosting is pissing me off, but I'm not completely innocent. Two girls I was chatting to just suddenly ghosted after 3/4 messages. One of them was liking my messages etc. and seemed engaged, then boom dropped off.

You put effort into messages, and then at any point they can just disengage forever. No point in over analyzing it I guess.

My takeaway is to just put in less effort and set up a meet ASAP like I've done before. Some drops can't be helped I guess, another guy probably caught her attention.