Everyone just moves on without me.
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03-15-2020, 07:25 AM #7081
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03-15-2020, 08:05 PM #7082
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03-16-2020, 12:27 AM #7083
No, patagucci, you are not a pussy for considering using that counselling. You are very fortunate to have it offered to you, because it's very unusual for an employer to have any such thing.
No person who considers getting mind-therapy when they're hurting is EVER a pussy, and you've felt enough courage to take that leap. I can fully vouch for it, as I doubt I would be alive if I hadn't taken that step years ago, and I think that a lot of people here will be supportive as well.
Your weight loss is only a cause for concern if it's UNEXPLAINED/MYSTERIOUS. If you know that you're not eating very much (which is a reaction of some, to depression - just as other people may react to depression by overeating), you can be expected to lose weight.
That's nothing unusual at all. I still have a head of hair, and some hairs always fall out when I bathe [shower], and that's been happening for decades! So, no, I don't think you're losing your hair.
Try to keep what "faith" you still have.
Right now, ALL of us are in rather uncharted territory, with what's happening externally."Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking" - Ray Bolger (The Scarecrow), THE WIZARD OF OZ, 1939.
Build, for a man, a fire - and he'll be warm for a little while. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
:-) (-:
[ALOHA - as used in its traditional sense of greeting, best wishes, and an affirmation of life.]
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03-17-2020, 09:02 AM #7084
How do you snap out of depression when you are stuck in an office doing the same repetitive tasks 40+ hours a week? My brain is rotted.
When I'm at work I I instantly fall into deep depression and it actually causes physical pain. Its just so boring working in an office
I feel like not having a purpose at work or in life is what causes severe depression. I felt more of a purpose pushing carts at wal martLast edited by eod8989; 03-17-2020 at 09:38 AM.
PC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-17-2020, 06:16 PM #7085
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03-18-2020, 03:54 AM #7086
Hey man, have obsessive thinking and OCD as well and when my gf cheated on me /left me it was probably the hardest and worst thing i have ever went through because my brain went into overdrive. Legit overdrive i COULD NOT stop thinking about her, what happened what i did, what i did wrong, what i should of done, this went on for mnths and months and i beat myself up EVEYR SINGLE DAY - i'm a ****ing loser, i couldn't satisfy her, i wasn't good enough for her , why didn't i do this , why didn't i do this.
Words cannot describe the horrible feelings ifelt, the guilt the shame, the anger, the regret. I pretty much was having suicidal fantasies (combiend with harldy eating/sleeping + stressful job) = hormones out of whack. It was by far the worst thing i've ever experienced.
It's been 9 months now and it's not until now i finally feel a bit better and the only solution i have found is
a) Cardio - i mean go for runs in nature, run and run and run and run. Not treadmill or a walk a hard challening run in a park trail
b) EVERY time i think of her i tell myself stop - i'm here now. I'm here now. I repeat this over and over.
hope this helps man.
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03-18-2020, 03:57 AM #7087
Man i feel lke this as well.
The worst part is - i don't get how others around me are so content with what they do? it's like being on a different planet.
Everyday i regret my career choice. I just sit in an office all day doing boring tedious repetitive tasks under time constraints (time sheets).
i hate it. I wish i was a doctor or physiotherapist or did something with more meaning/physical. This work is soul destroying.
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03-18-2020, 04:05 AM #7088
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03-18-2020, 04:10 AM #7089
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03-18-2020, 05:02 PM #7090
Lmao my psychiatrist kicked me out of her practice because I called her and the other employees cawksucking fuks. I was 6 minutes late to my appointment and she wouldnt see me. So, I just snapped since I'm dealing with a lot of personal issues and I've been manic for a couple months now. That kunt is just a money scheming bich anyway.
Training Log:
https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=180254293&p=1640414853#post1640414853
I will always follow my own path and stay true to myself and my heart, to do what I feel is right
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03-18-2020, 05:26 PM #7091
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03-18-2020, 11:50 PM #7092
My best answer is that many people will approach their job with a "stoic and clinical" approach. "The work is boring and no fun, but I have to do it, so I might as well deal" so that I'll have money for rent and for things I want to eat and things I want to do. I work out of my own home office now, with my own job, and I have to take that approach for the parts of the job I dislike.
There is no guarantee this will work for everybody.
Smoking in the WORKPLACE...in Missouri??? Interesting, I thought just about everywhere had banned smoking at the workplace years, if not decades, ago."Some people without brains do an awful lot of talking" - Ray Bolger (The Scarecrow), THE WIZARD OF OZ, 1939.
Build, for a man, a fire - and he'll be warm for a little while. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
:-) (-:
[ALOHA - as used in its traditional sense of greeting, best wishes, and an affirmation of life.]
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03-19-2020, 03:27 AM #7093
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03-19-2020, 09:01 PM #7094
My hairline is done bros
Just gonna shave it off
Not that I care about it anymore but depression just ruins youPC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-21-2020, 02:45 PM #7095
Haven’t posted on here in awhile since I don’t come on here much anymore but nothing has really changed much for me. Still going through the fluctuation of moods everyday. I’m still at the same job yet but won’t be working for another few weeks due to what’s going on in the world right now. They said they’ll pay me at least for a few weeks though. I was going to take some chances to try to make more money though soon. I just really stopped feeling sorry for myself & don’t really think about dating or any of that other **** I used to complain about constantly on here. I cringe at some of the stuff I’ve posted on here over the years & wonder why I wasted so much time doing that ****. I definitely was way worse mentally at the time though. At this point I rather just focus on myself with things & try to take it one day at a time & see what happens. Hope everyone here is doing okay.
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03-22-2020, 03:44 PM #7096
I wish i knew how to change. But my dopamine receptors are fried and i have become too selfish. I just feel a major lack of purpose now days and i've lost interest in everything.
PC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-23-2020, 04:18 AM #7097
Anyone here feel like the human body wasnt meant to live past 30? My mind and body are breaking down.
PC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-23-2020, 06:56 AM #7098
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03-23-2020, 05:53 PM #7099
Getting depressed because of school and life no longer because of woman but because i hate the field ive chosen and i wish i joined the military and didnt lie to myself and pretend to be someone im not 4 years ago. Now im 24 with 2.5 years left in a CS degree and its just getting harder and harder and im getting less and less motivated and i ****ing hate it. Hate my professors hate the degree path hate where im at in life.
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03-24-2020, 04:27 AM #7100
My depression is bad. I basically cant do anything anymore. I'm going to lose my job. Idk how people cope without intimacy or friends. Babies literally die if they dont get attention.
PC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-24-2020, 05:39 AM #7101
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03-24-2020, 05:45 AM #7102
When you have high iq you're just going to get mental health issues eventually. Like depression or bipolar. Its inevitable. It's due to how you perceive the world and extremely high levels of awareness
Ignorance is blissPC specs
i9 9900k/AMD RX 6800 16 GB/16 GB RAM/LG BX 65'' OLED/Gigabyte GS27QC 27''
OLED Master Race crew
1440p 120+ fps only crew
6'2 master race crew
Audiophile crew
Metal crew
Introvert/INTJ crew
German crew
If you aren't getting stronger you aren't getting bigger crew
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03-24-2020, 08:52 AM #7103
Fuk man. Idk if anyone understands gambling addiction, but I just cant stop. Ill stop for 2/3 months and then just dump all my money into super high risk plays and blow it all. I honesty cant see anyone of stopping this other than blowing out my brains(not suicidal, just a realization).
A big part of it is because I was formerly pretty well off due to hard work and saving, was probably in the top 10% of 24 year olds for networth, but got caught up chasing the joneses. Blew about 100,000$ in the last 8 months or so, flat broke AGAIN.
And im sure in another month or two when J have a couple grand ill start again, and repeat the process for infinity.
The really fuked part about it all is I actually advise people financially, and they are all making bank. I just dont follow my advice. Like a streetwise crackhead. Smh
Edit: For a gambler, the worst thing in the world is hope.Last edited by brahskimoseph; 03-24-2020 at 09:12 AM.
6'0 249 @ 18 years old in AVI
Goals @ 225 or Less
365 Incline BP, 500 Paused Squat, 400lb C&J,300Lb Snatch
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03-24-2020, 10:58 AM #7104
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03-24-2020, 11:00 AM #7105
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03-24-2020, 01:55 PM #7106
Options/stock trading. Been addicted ever since I won 13k in an hour, aint ever been right since. Im a weird guy man, I dont drink, but when I do I drink super hard. I dont work much, but when I do, I go 150% pedal to the metal, same with lifting, same with women. I have two speeds: a slow shuffle or an all out sprint.
Myself from a year ago would be cringing so fukin hard. Ive put on 40 lbs, stopped any real training/going out/dating ect, become dumber from just being caught up in the suspense of weekly option trades, and just generally losing my mind.6'0 249 @ 18 years old in AVI
Goals @ 225 or Less
365 Incline BP, 500 Paused Squat, 400lb C&J,300Lb Snatch
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03-24-2020, 02:54 PM #7107
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03-25-2020, 05:26 PM #7108
Figuring out that im just an adrenaline junkie.
Explains why i always procrastinate, like fighting/olympic lifting/sprinting, running from police, raw dogging sloots, amongst other high risk activities. Gambling is just another method of jackkng up my adrenaline, except it goes on for weeks at a time. Not healthy at all.6'0 249 @ 18 years old in AVI
Goals @ 225 or Less
365 Incline BP, 500 Paused Squat, 400lb C&J,300Lb Snatch
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03-25-2020, 06:31 PM #7109
Now im at the “Im really glad I dont have any bullets” phase where I know I lost(still locked in a trade), but theres still a glimmer of hope, which keeps me going. Soon, Ill have a networth of 0 again, be tempted to take out a loan at an absurd rate, decide against it, save up for 3 or 4 months, and do it all again chasing what Ive lost. Its been nearly a year of this. I dont know what the fuk to do, Ive been to GA, Ive done acid to try and reset myself, cardio, reading, boxing, working more, nothing fukin works. What THE ****. I want to ****ing explode. I know the probabilities, I know what Im doing is idiotic, I know I cant afford to do it, I know its killing me, I know my family and friends are incredibly dissapointed and some have broken off ties with me, I know Im nowhere even close to where I should be in life. ****. I just ran hill sprints and boxed and lifted and IM still running at full speed and Im still thinking and calculating probabilities at 1000%, and I only slept 3 hours last night and 5 the night before.
Ive never been an addict prior to gambling. Honestly, I think Im going to to take out a loan, sell my car, max out all my credit cards and put it all on some high risk play, and if it doesnt work, Ill just kill myself. Get this chit over with already.
Edit: 100 thousand dollars. I have squandered away over 100 thousand fukin dollars in less than a year. What the fuk6'0 249 @ 18 years old in AVI
Goals @ 225 or Less
365 Incline BP, 500 Paused Squat, 400lb C&J,300Lb Snatch
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03-25-2020, 06:39 PM #7110
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