Aussie Teen Fights Crocodile for Date with a Girl (True Story)

[Lou1se]

An 18-year-old north Queensland man who survived a crocodile attack after drinking "ten cups of goon", has scored a movie date with the backpacker he was trying to impress. The teenager who jumped into a croc-infested river in far north Queensland has explained he "was just trying to prove a point" as he recovers in Cairns Hospital.

18-year-old Lee De Paauw recounted his close call with a croc, telling Nine News he thought "f--- ... I'm gone for sure" when the crocodile first latched onto his arm on Sunday morning.


(Be sure to read the comments on youtube under the video)


It all started just before 2.30am, when Mr De Paauw leapt into the Johnstone River at Innisfail to impress English backpacker Sophie Paterson, who he had just met.

"I started to tell them about how backpackers are more likely to get eaten by a crocodile than Australians, so we decided to go down to the river and test the theory," he said.


Teen crocodile victim Lee De Paauw said to all those who criticised his decision to jump into
the croc-infected river, "haters gonna hate".

[mtpockets]

That's nuts,
reminds me of an old joke




There was once a millionaire who collected a large amount of alligators as pets. One day when he held a party he came up with a proposition. He said if anyone could swim across the alligator infested pool and emerge unharmed he would pay them $1 million or give them his daughter, a supermodel.

Immediately after he finished saying this he heard a splash and the entire crowd watched and cheered as the young man swam quickly across the pool, and emerged unharmed.

The millionaire was amazed but said that he would hold up his end of the bargain.

"Well", he said,"do you want the $1 million or my daughter? The young man answered, "Sir, I don't want your money or your daughter, I just want the prick who pushed me in."

[wesleysh21]

Damn, I really thought he was going to be a black dude.

[JediRN]

meh,we've all been there for some tight strange.

[Bo_Flecks]

Dude jumps in water to impress girl. Girl responds by saying she'd never heard a guy scream like that.



Dude deserves an ironwill facepalm.

[Karl_Hungus]

Haters gonna hate.

[Mark1T]

An 18-year-old north Queensland man who survived a crocodile attack after drinking "ten cups of goon", has scored a movie date with the backpacker he was trying to impress. The teenager who jumped into a croc-infested river in far north Queensland has explained he "was just trying to prove a point" as he recovers in Cairns Hospital.

18-year-old Lee De Paauw recounted his close call with a croc, telling Nine News he thought "f--- ... I'm gone for sure" when the crocodile first latched onto his arm on Sunday morning.


(Be sure to read the comments on youtube under the video)


It all started just before 2.30am, when Mr De Paauw leapt into the Johnstone River at Innisfail to impress English backpacker Sophie Paterson, who he had just met.

"I started to tell them about how backpackers are more likely to get eaten by a crocodile than Australians, so we decided to go down to the river and test the theory," he said.


Teen crocodile victim Lee De Paauw said to all those who criticised his decision to jump into
the croc-infected river, "haters gonna hate".

Looeez, is his tongue permanently fixed in place like that, after that goon-love experience? If it was just bad timing, I won't make fun of him.

Also, is that what a man has to do to get a girl in Australier?

"It was only aftah the bloody gatah bit me arm that I realized I made a goofy decision."

[Lou1se]

hahaha thanks all! Be'n laughing myself silly tonight.

Ronny Chieng says it in one - Australia can be dangerous, if you're a dumbass.

To clear the confusion, this is NOT the way to get Aussie women...well, normal ones. lol

And btw 'Goon' is Australian for boxed wine and '10 cups' is Australian for ‘light refreshment’.


OK y'all have a great day naow!

[Guinea-pig]

Somewhere in Australia, there's a croc purchaseing goggles and telling the story about the one that got away.....

[pvsampson]

hahaha thanks all! Be'n laughing myself silly tonight.

Ronny Chieng says it in one - Australia can be dangerous, if you're a dumbass.

To clear the confusion, this is NOT the way to get Aussie women...well, normal ones. lol

And btw 'Goon' is Australian for boxed wine and '10 cups' is Australian for ‘light refreshment’.


OK y'all have a great day naow!

Yeah...The word " goon" comes from the days before the boxed wine bags.The only way to buy any wine in quantities larger than a standard bottle size was in glass flagons. Flagons were nicknamed...Goons. When the bag wines were made available,they were called Goon Bags.

Goon bags changed Friday and Saturday cheap drunken nights forever. Try staggering around holding a heavy glass two litre capacity flagon,after consuming half of it within a two hour period. Goon bags are much easier to handle,and double the capacity.Also,they don't break toes when dropped,or crack skulls when someone gets hit by one.

[pvsampson]

It seems the kid is not exactly a smart guy....

http://www.news.com.au/national/quee...761e6480fbd2e7

[Lou1se]

Yeah...The word " goon" comes from the days before the boxed wine bags.The only way to buy any wine in quantities larger than a standard bottle size was in glass flagons. Flagons were nicknamed...Goons. When the bag wines were made available,they were called Goon Bags.

Goon bags changed Friday and Saturday cheap drunken nights forever. Try staggering around holding a heavy glass two litre capacity flagon,after consuming half of it within a two hour period. Goon bags are much easier to handle,and double the capacity.Also,they don't break toes when dropped,or crack skulls when someone gets hit by one.

Thanks for setting the record straight, Pete

Many people upset today on hearing the news Clint Eastwood had passed away, thankfully it appears to be a hoax.

[Marius_Ursus]

I have to say I love Australians. All the most fun and sharpest guys I trained with were from Aus compared to all the other nationalities (Scots, English, Germans, Norwegians, Swedes, Israelis, and French). I think it might have been because I never met one who took himself too seriously, so you always knew what was on their mind. They always seemed to have a, "Yeah! I'm up for it, mate!" attitude...so this kid fits the stereotype.

English and Scots were a very close second.

The Norwegians were the worst.

[Georgeoz]

I have never heard of "goon" to describe cask (not "boxed") wine, which by the way was invented in Oz. I have also never heard the expression "ten cups". Maybe these expressions are used only in Queensland?

Or maybe the poster was just "taking the piss" out of a credulous audience?

[pvsampson]

I have never heard of "goon" to describe cask (not "boxed") wine, which by the way was invented in Oz. I have also never heard the expression "ten cups". Maybe these expressions are used only in Queensland?

Or maybe the poster was just "taking the piss" out of a credulous audience?

"Boxed wine" seems to be the foreign name. Also,when the croc incident occurred,I highly doubt this kid was partaking by means of a wine glass. When he states ten cups,I am pretty sure he meant that literally.

[paolo59]

Oh to be young again!

[ElrondHubbard]

Oh to be young again!

AKA "I'm sure glad that's over with!"

[Lou1se]

I have to say I love Australians. All the most fun and sharpest guys I trained with were from Aus compared to all the other nationalities (Scots, English, Germans, Norwegians, Swedes, Israelis, and French). I think it might have been because I never met one who took himself too seriously, so you always knew what was on their mind. They always seemed to have a, "Yeah! I'm up for it, mate!" attitude...so this kid fits the stereotype.

English and Scots were a very close second.

The Norwegians were the worst.

I remember another miscer here who, like you, described his experiences with working with a bunch of young Aussies many years ago and said much the same thing. It wouldn't surprise me if these fellas feel the same way in return and enjoy reminiscing old times. Thanks for sharing, Mars

Oh to be young again!

I'm with Elrondhubbard... I'll pass thanks

[Marius_Ursus]

I remember another miscer here who, like you, described his experiences with working with a bunch of young Aussies many years ago and said much the same thing. It wouldn't surprise me if these fellas feel the same way in return and enjoy reminiscing old times. Thanks for sharing, Mars

I guess there's something to be said for being reared in a former penal colony. LOL

As Bill Murray put it, "Our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world!"

[Georgeoz]

This was the term given to the first generation of the Australian-born sons of the convicts who had arrived here in the late 18th century. By the early 1800s, numerous contemporary accounts testify to the sturdy physiques and strong independence of spirit of those born here.

Of course, the convicts were not really criminals, just victims of British class oppression with enough independence of spirit and strength to have somehow escaped the gallows. So the gene pool was pretty resilient to start with.

By the time of the First War, the qualities of the Aussie Diggers were well recognised and scandalised the effete British (and incompetent) officers in command of them. Incidentally, there were at least as many casualties from STDs as there were from German bullets - Aussie men are partial to a good root and (although I say so myself) are pretty nifty with the sheilas.

This young man diving in among the crocs on impulse and with plenty of grog in him and with hopes of a female reward, is exactly in this tradition. Add to the mix that he was a bit of a dickhead and further explanation is unnecessary for anyone who lives here.

[jeffaus]

Young bloke with a belly full of pi#s doing dumb sh#t to impress a female = Typical Aussie yobbo.

[Fishman15]

Young bloke with a belly full of pi#s doing dumb sh#t to impress a female = Typical Aussie yobbo.

So how long before they marry? I think he has a better than 50-50 shot at her now...

[jeffaus]

So how long before they marry? I think he has a better than 50-50 shot at her now...

Yobbos rarely marry. They usually just live together and produce a bunch of kids they can claim welfare payments for.

[Georgeoz]

T,he Cairns Post reports another young man got high on ice and tried to do sex with a croc.

The respectable press believes this story is fake news.

I do think Jeffaus is being a bit hard on yobbos. It is an established physiological fact that, until a young man gets to about 26, his brain hasn't stopped developing and he will do dumb things. Most young men I know (including several grandsons in that perilous age group) are a real trial to their parents - nothing but boozing and rooting, but the latter only if they are not too pissed to get it up.

[Lou1se]

T,he Cairns Post reports another young man got high on ice and tried to do sex with a croc.

The respectable press believes this story is fake news.

I do think Jeffaus is being a bit hard on yobbos. It is an established physiological fact that, until a young man gets to about 26, his brain hasn't stopped developing and he will do dumb things. Most young men I know (including several grandsons in that perilous age group) are a real trial to their parents - nothing but boozing and rooting, but the latter only if they are not too pissed to get it up.

lol

dammit George, I used that "fake" article in the jokes thread just yesterday!

https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showt...post1509415551 (after the Prime Minister article)

Had to change it a little to suit this site..seeing that a certain topic is out of bounds, also don't want to get suspended

And on the topic of young yobos, some of us sheilas were crafty enough to avoid them