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  1. #1
    Registered User Acee100's Avatar
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    Girl with trust issues, how to make her trust you?

    Hey folks

    I was wondering how you guys proceed with a girl you really like, and have been dating for 1 month now, but has trust issues because of past relationships. She wont tell you anything when she is down. Lets say you ask her "whats wrong" she says its nothing.. How do you make her trust you? Or should I let her open up for me without asking her so much?

    Sorry for my bad english.
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  2. #2
    as advertised xvicknumber7x's Avatar
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    You can't "make her" trust you. All you can do is follow through on the things you say you will do and be loyal and fun. Whether or not she comes around is really up to her.
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  3. #3
    Keanu Reeves Checking In Zackad's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by xvicknumber7x View Post
    You can't "make her" trust you. All you can do is follow through on the things you say you will do and be loyal and fun. Whether or not she comes around is really up to her.
    This.

    Just expect there to be a minimal level of trust for the first few months at least. If nothing has improved by like 6 months in, then it's a problem for her to deal with, not you.

    Although the way you describe it just sounds like females being females, being moody but not wanting to talk about it
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    Registered User Acee100's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by xvicknumber7x View Post
    You can't "make her" trust you. All you can do is follow through on the things you say you will do and be loyal and fun. Whether or not she comes around is really up to her.
    Sounds good. She really likes me to, but idk, she just doesnt trust me that much. She has said that to me face to face. She doesnt want to be hurt and get depressed all over again. She even let me meet her mother (im the first guy ever lmao, after just 1 month). Seems like some serious trust issues.
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    Registered User Acee100's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Zackad View Post
    This.

    Just expect there to be a minimal level of trust for the first few months at least. If nothing has improved by like 6 months in, then it's a problem for her to deal with, not you.

    Although the way you describe it just sounds like females being females, being moody but not wanting to talk about it
    Shouldnt they be happy we bother to ask about how they have it? lol.
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    Originally Posted by Acee100 View Post
    Sounds good. She really likes me to, but idk, she just doesnt trust me that much. .
    Shes known you a month my dude. Why should she trust you?

    If you want to start building trust then give her some stuff on you, open up to her. But in due time, slowly. Trust develops breh. Takes time. I wouldn't trust her yet either.
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    Registered User ppantera's Avatar
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    you do nothing. Its only one month man.
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    Originally Posted by xvicknumber7x View Post
    You can't "make her" trust you. All you can do is follow through on the things you say you will do and be loyal and fun. Whether or not she comes around is really up to her.
    This and I would have a time limit on how long she keeps up with the insecurity. If you prove you're loyal but she is still hounding you 2 months later and wanting to check your phone because she convinced herself you're getting pussy on the side, I'd walk. Most women I've known with trust issues never really break free of them no matter how good the guy is.

    Also there are a lot of types that get some sort of satisfaction out of seeing someone jump through hoops to show they'll be good to you. Like some attention-starved woman who needs constant validation or compliments, she will never be satisfied. If she turns out like one of those types then move on.
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  10. #10
    Registered User Acee100's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mestaykool View Post
    Shes known you a month my dude. Why should she trust you?

    If you want to start building trust then give her some stuff on you, open up to her. But in due time, slowly. Trust develops breh. Takes time. I wouldn't trust her yet either.
    Sounds good bruh. The best way is to open up myself, little by little, maybe then after some time she will trust me.

    Originally Posted by DolphinPilot View Post
    This and I would have a time limit on how long she keeps up with the insecurity. If you prove you're loyal but she is still hounding you 2 months later and wanting to check your phone because she convinced herself you're getting pussy on the side, I'd walk. Most women I've known with trust issues never really break free of them no matter how good the guy is.

    Also there are a lot of types that get some sort of satisfaction out of seeing someone jump through hoops to show they'll be good to you. Like some attention-starved woman who needs constant validation or compliments, she will never be satisfied. If she turns out like one of those types then move on.
    She never checks my phone. I think shes loyal, thats what her best girlfriend say, but I wont trust that to much. Its only been 1 month, to early. I know for sure she aint the type of girl that want compliments all the time, cause when I compliment her she really doenst care. She has said that she doesnt belive me when I give her compliment, because the guys before me have said the same.
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  11. #11
    Godly Akustics backpain101's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Acee100 View Post
    Sounds good bruh. The best way is to open up myself, little by little, maybe then after some time she will trust me.



    She never checks my phone. I think shes loyal, thats what her best girlfriend say, but I wont trust that to much. Its only been 1 month, to early. I know for sure she aint the type of girl that want compliments all the time, cause when I compliment her she really doenst care. She has said that she doesnt belive me when I give her compliment, because the guys before me have said the same.
    My gf doesnt believe me when i compliment her. I still do it. Whether or not she believes you is irrelevant the fact that your saying it and mean it will eventually break through to her.

    Oh and your gf will always snoop your phone even if she is the most trustworthy person(and its not necessarily a bad thing unless your doing the dirty) I would do it too lol. Its not that you dont trust each other its just extra validation.


    but dont be over the top with the compliments as its gay.
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  12. #12
    Aesthetics Black Belt 🥋 exyl's Avatar
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    There is enough good advice in this thread. I'm out lol
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    Registered Superhero TheJizzler's Avatar
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    She's known you a month, so trusting you implicitly isn't something you should be expecting right now

    ... but be very careful about any girl who has a history of chitty relationships and automatically assumes new guys are cum

    Originally Posted by Acee100 View Post
    She never checks my phone. I think shes loyal, thats what her best girlfriend say, but I wont trust that to much. Its only been 1 month, to early. I know for sure she aint the type of girl that want compliments all the time, cause when I compliment her she really doenst care. She has said that she doesnt belive me when I give her compliment, because the guys before me have said the same.
    Thought so

    High chance that she's one of those girls who subconciously likes being treated like chit, OP. Can't take any compliments because she has low self-esteem. Probably won't put any effort into your relationship since she won't even confront her own feels

    Girls who like decent guys tend to have one bad relationship then learn from their mistake - they don't go around talking about their 'azzhole ex' or 'trust issues' to dudes they just met

    If this is the case, showing her that you're a decent guy will likely have her so disinterested that you'll be jumping through ever-more-difficult hoops and getting a breakup talk within a month or two


    Advice: just be you. If you're a decent guy, it will show. If she wants a good guy and there's chemistry, she'll stick around without making you jump through hoops

    Advice if she turns out to be an idiot and you're desperate to get laid: Act like Prince Charming for a few weeks, then treat her like total chit. Channel your inner douche-canoe and she'll be all over you


    Originally Posted by backpain101 View Post
    My gf doesnt believe me when i compliment her. I still do it. Whether or not she believes you is irrelevant the fact that your saying it and mean it will eventually break through to her.

    Oh and your gf will always snoop your phone even if she is the most trustworthy person(and its not necessarily a bad thing unless your doing the dirty) I would do it too lol. Its not that you dont trust each other its just extra validation.


    but dont be over the top with the compliments as its gay.
    A guy who feels the need to check his GF's phone giving relationship advice...

    It is absolutely the case that you don't trust each other. Dudes only snoop when they know they've got desperate and laxed their standards on integrity. And you're a total pussy if you let your girlfriend rummage through your chit
    Last edited by TheJizzler; 02-01-2017 at 05:04 AM.
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    Easiest way is to open up to her a little. Be a little vulnerable. It will make her more comfortable opening up to you. It won't be over night though.
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    Godly Akustics backpain101's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by TheJizzler View Post




    A guy who feels the need to check his GF's phone giving relationship advice...

    It is absolutely the case that you don't trust each other. Dudes only snoop when they know they've got desperate and laxed their standards on integrity. And you're a total pussy if you let your girlfriend rummage through your chit
    Curiosity killed the cat my friend, we all do it. Taking a hit in morals to have a nosey, and if your woman gets a load of attention need to keep that chit in check and cut it off before 'were just friends' bs happens.


    I trust her, i dont trust other guys.
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    Registered Superhero TheJizzler's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by backpain101 View Post
    Curiosity killed the cat my friend, we all do it. Taking a hit in morals to have a nosey, and if your woman gets a load of attention need to keep that chit in check and cut it off before 'were just friends' bs happens.


    I trust her, i dont trust other guys.
    Yeah, keep telling yourself that...

    If snooping is a consideration it means you know you're dating trash but you don't believe you can do any better. So, to cope, you make a grab for the phone and keep telling yourself that this counts as validation and she's too stupid to cover her tracks (just lol)

    But hey, whatever makes a dude feel like he's in control... can't be easy when his gf demands to go through his stuff
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    Registered User Nedo's Avatar
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    Tell her to trust you until you do something to break her trust and vice versa, can't bring the past into our relationship, turn a new page, etc.
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    Trust takes time to build. If your good to her she will come around. Its a protective mechanism
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    Woman here. Firstly, good on yourself for even thinking of wanting to do the right thing and treat her properly. You cannot do anything in order to make someone trust you however try your hardest to never make her feel insecure about something, never lie to her and just simply be there for her! If she shares personal information, do not share it with anyone. Trust her as well.
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