Should I Confront My Roommate?

[ThePinsir]

I recently got an apartment with a guy I've been friends with for 4 or 5 years. He's always been incredibly shy and socially awkward (he might have Aspergers or something), but we've always gotten along great and he's one of my best friends.

A few days ago, I got off work early and went to my room early to take a nap before class. Before I actually fell asleep, I heard him get up. He started talking to himself.

I know he wasn't on the phone because since then, he's done this every day, even at like 2 in the morning. Once, when I was coming in through the front door, I heard him rambling to himself, and as soon as I walked in the door he stopped. Sometimes at night I'll hear him talking to himself, and if I, say, get up to pee, he'll stop, then start again in a few minutes. And it'll go on for like an hour or two until he eventually goes to sleep.

Anyway, it's difficult to actually hear what words he's saying, but he sounds like he's so pissed off, which is really weird because I've literally never seen him mad in my life. He sounds like he's impatient and yelling at someone who isn't there. Sometimes he'll repeat the same phrase a few times, really aggressively, like he's lecturing someone.

He's done this every day since last week, usually when I go to sleep at night. I know he's talking really loudly, almost yelling, because I can hear him through the walls/doors. It's not so loud that I can't sleep over it, but it is creepy as ****. The first time I heard him do it I about shat my pants. Anyway, it's fawking weird and I'm literally losing sleep over it, wondering if I should lock my door and keep a knife under my pillow.

Is behavior like this cause for concern? Should I ask him about it, or maybe ask his parents if they know about it? I don't want to embarrass my bro, but goddamn, it's ****ing creepy. Maybe it's like a stress-relieving coping mechanism, and I should just leave it alone? What do?

TL;DR
- My room mate talks to himself, loudly and angrily, at night, and it's creepy as ****.
- Should I tell him to shut the **** up?

[jacobcmurphy]

The first time I heard him do it I about shat my pants. Anyway, it's fawking weird and I'm literally losing sleep over it, wondering if I should lock my door and keep a knife under my pillow.

Lost it at this lmao

Just ask him about it, if you're good friends I'm sure it wont be that weird

[MusicProducer]

Yeah man, you should definitely bring it up to him. At the least, it's because he's shouting in the middle of the night and that's not cool. Even if you don't lose sleep over it, you shouldn't have to deal with that kinda stuff in the middle of the night.


At least if you bring it up to him, don't call him out about talking to himself. Just say something like "Hey I can hear you talking on the phone really loudly at night and the walls are thin; mind keeping it down?"

[BuckNakedinBama]

Just keep it casual, ask him "were you on the phone late last night? Thought I heard you talking to someone." Gives him an opportunity to open up to you. If he doesn't, don't push him, just hope that he quiets down. If he does, be supportive. But yeah, lock your bedroom door. There's no reason not to. Also maybe get a sleep sound machine to play waves crashing or something. White noise will help drown out him talking, etc.

[DatPass]

Tonight on FOX News: Bodybuilder kills homosexual lover with kitchen knife.

[Swamp Dog]

There is no way to handle this delicately. All you can do is say something like "I heard you talking on the phone last night. You sounded upset. You want to talk about it?"

[PoundMobb]

Don't say some "on the phone" BS.

Yes, you should say something. Tell him what you told us. "Hey man, I've noticed you talking to yourself a lot. Is everything alright? Maybe it's none of my business but it's keeping me up at night and it's a little creepy."

Be straight up.

[BustaCapp]

[chappy86]

If you mention anything to him, he is going to stab you. Get another roomate / apartment.

[TheDefiant1]

Known friend for 5 years

Lives with him

Scared to ask him


LOL are you sure YOU aren't the one thats imagining ****?


I dont know what kind of beta you are (but since you are close friends with an aspie im going to assume birds of a feather flock together). But heres an easy solution, when Im trying to sleep and my roommate is in the kitchen talking to himself (hypothetically speaking) I scream out SHUT THE FUK UP ******* WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO GODDAMNIT" Then I come out like bro who are you talking to.

But i forgot this is the misc that wouldnt make sense for a guy like OP.

[digistp]

He's probably just getting rekt in cod

[MusicProducer]

Don't say some "on the phone" BS.

Yes, you should say something. Tell him what you told us. "Hey man, I've noticed you talking to yourself a lot. Is everything alright? Maybe it's none of my business but it's keeping me up at night and it's a little creepy."

Be straight up.

Don't do this. This roommate is OP's bro and the roommate has obviously been trying to hide the fact that he talks to himself. Doing a major callout is just gonna rustle jimmies everywhere.

If someone had a problem with what I was doing, then I would want them to be straight direct, but most people can't handle that kind of directness.

[DatTrolololsong]

He has anxiety problems. Lots of ppl that do can't seem to get out of their own head. He is lacking relationships and needs a friend. Tell him you used to talk to yourself too just to make him feel better but he prob needs counseling

[XabstractX]

He's probably playing video games and talking on mic

[Swamp Dog]

Don't do this. This roommate is OP's bro and the roommate has obviously been trying to hide the fact that he talks to himself. Doing a major callout is just gonna rustle jimmies everywhere.

This. Allow him a graceful way to respond. Starting off a conversation by accusing a person of being insane is not a good way to do anything.
If he does not offer a decent explanation or to quiet down then you can take it to another level.

[PoundMobb]

Don't do this. This roommate is OP's bro and the roommate has obviously been trying to hide the fact that he talks to himself. Doing a major callout is just gonna rustle jimmies everywhere.

If someone had a problem with what I was doing, then I would want them to be straight direct, but most people can't handle that kind of directness.

Gotta cut to the chase. It would let the roommate know that OP knows already and he'd probably be more inclined to be honest than if you give him some phone excuse to roll with.

[PoundMobb]

But yeah, he's probably playing some halo.

[Swamp Dog]

Op, just be prepared to not have a good resolution. I have confronted roommates before who were legit crazy and it did no good. Live with it or go your separate ways.

[BrandG]

He's probably playing video games and talking on mic

Probably this, OP. Does he play a lot of games?

When I used to live with my mom, my step sister used to come over and told me that she used to think I was taking to myself all the time and thought I was weird but I was just on PS3

[MusicProducer]

Gotta cut to the chase. It would let the roommate know that OP knows already and he'd probably be more inclined to be honest than if you give him some phone excuse to roll with.

There's no reason to let OP's roommate know that knows, unless he has some reason to get into his roommate's business. OP just wants the creepy talking in the middle of the night to stop. I don't think OP is trying to be his roommates therapist.

Probably this, OP. Does he play a lot of games?

When I used to live with my mom, my step sister used to come over and told me that she used to think I was taking to myself all the time and thought I was weird but I was just on PS3

would be completely lulzy if this were the case

[FU3L]

Are you sure he isn't playing games or something and talking on mic?

If not, he has psychological issues and bringing up the problem isn't going to fix anything.

[iMakeItRain100s]

Probably this, OP. Does he play a lot of games?

When I used to live with my mom, my step sister used to come over and told me that she used to think I was taking to myself all the time and thought I was weird but I was just on PS3

Actually this is probably the most likely situation. I had a few gamer roommates who stayed up until 3-4am playing league of legends and I would hear the same mumbling and that might explain the anger (seen my old roommate rage harder at LoL than when he found out his gf was cheating on him)

[tats27]

Start locking your bedroom door, OP.

That's some serial killer sh!t

[ThePinsir]

Probably this, OP. Does he play a lot of games?

When I used to live with my mom, my step sister used to come over and told me that she used to think I was taking to myself all the time and thought I was weird but I was just on PS3

I don't think so. His Xbox and Playstation are in the living room, he talks to himself in his own bedroom (mostly) and the only PC game he plays is like Skyrim or something.

Thanks to all the helpful posters. The general consensus seems to be to bring it up, whether under the "phone" pretense or not. I think I will.

[KenKanifff]

like mentioned is he playing video games probally getting rustled as **** playing Fifa.

if not than be cautious he probally needs help

[ThePinsir]

Actually this is probably the most likely situation. I had a few gamer roommates who stayed up until 3-4am playing league of legends and I would hear the same mumbling and that might explain the anger (seen my old roommate rage harder at LoL than when he found out his gf was cheating on him)

One of my old roommates did this **** with LoL and Gary's Mod bull****. This isn't the same at all lol

[ThePinsir]

would be completely lulzy if this were the case

I agree. I'd also feel like a huge twat lol

[m1n2v5]

Had a college roommate who I didn't know well go on angry rants to himself. I never brought it up, just locked myself in my room. Chit is definitely weird.

[Gsxr25]

Rip op

[NordBrah]

when he finally snaps, you're going to be his first victim.

Stay safe OP.