Lost all motivation

[SkinnyKappa]

Hey guys,

I'm 19 and I started working out in June, and have gone to the gym consistently until the semester ended about 2 weeks ago.

The thing is that I've hated going to the gym lately. I feel like **** when I go. Primary reason is that I'm so weak. I still can't bench press over 95 lbs, and in the two weeks I haven't worked out I pretty much lost all those "gains" I've made.

I got nothing out of going to the gym. Just a skinny hunchback bitch embarrassing himself trying to work out. Girls don't even give a **** about me. That **** just depressed me, but at the same time not going to the gym also depresses me. I feel like a depressed lazy scrawny noob sitting at home doing nothing and avoiding the gym.

Any help?

[EdgarM3]

I was like that when I first started, do you have a fiend that can go lift with you? That helped me to not feel alone. Another thing I did was to focus on MYSELF only and not give a rat about anyone else. just thinking about how big I wanna be and that I'm alone on this journey cuz only me can make myself stronger. How much do you weight?

[andrewq6100]

Hey guys,

I'm 19 and I started working out in June, and have gone to the gym consistently until the semester ended about 2 weeks ago.

The thing is that I've hated going to the gym lately. I feel like **** when I go. Primary reason is that I'm so weak. I still can't bench press over 95 lbs, and in the two weeks I haven't worked out I pretty much lost all those "gains" I've made.

I got nothing out of going to the gym. Just a skinny hunchback bitch embarrassing himself trying to work out. Girls don't even give a **** about me. That **** just depressed me, but at the same time not going to the gym also depresses me. I feel like a depressed lazy scrawny noob sitting at home doing nothing and avoiding the gym.

Any help?

Hey Kappa,

these feelings are all to familiar with me, thus one of the reasons why I only went to gym at like 1 am lol. My first question would be, how much do you weigh?

Also do not EVER worry about how much WEIGHT you can move, but how WELL you can move it, and how HARD your muscles work when you move it. I do 20 lb dumbbell flies all day long with perfect form until my arms fall off ; sure I could do 30 or even 40 but my form would be off and I wouldn't be getting the contraction and muscle tension needed for growth.

another thing is you gotta check your self confidence. I know before I hit the gym I used to be such a negative person about myself but for no reason. Do you ever get girls actually rejecting you or commenting on your body? Most likely not, it's usually all within you and that voice inside your head telling you your fat ugly and can't do it. We all have that voice, the trick is to say NO and to prove it wrong.

Depression and working out go hand in hand, trust me. If you are depressed then you need to spend more time in the gym then anywhere else. In life there are 2 certain factors; death and taxes. But i've found a third and that is bodybuilding. only YOU can determine how big you get, how sexy you look, and overall how fit you can become. Start off with looking at yourself, top to bottom, and then figuring out if its your OUTER appearance that needs working, or if its really just a mental thing.

From your post alone I can tell you are a good guy, laid back down to earth with motivation, but there is something that is deterring you. Is it a recent break up or did someone talk negative to you? Make sure to press ALL negativity OUT and if you can't then get it out in the GYM!

Again depression is NO JOKE but if you're depressed because girls don't look at you often, then that is something you have 100% control over, and that is something in life we rarely get; total control! So start with analyzing yourself inside and out, and setting your OWN goals and mini steps first before anything. The girls, the gains, and big weights will all come after, but first you have to focus on yourself.

You got this man don't worry, I'm 25 and just now started living my fit journey. When I was 19 I was in the worst shape of my life, on drugs, no girl batted an eye at me, my self confidence was with bugs and beetles and all in all it seemed like it couldn't get better, but it did and it will. It all depends on YOU!

[SkinnyKappa]

Hey Kappa,

these feelings are all to familiar with me, thus one of the reasons why I only went to gym at like 1 am lol. My first question would be, how much do you weigh?

Also do not EVER worry about how much WEIGHT you can move, but how WELL you can move it, and how HARD your muscles work when you move it. I do 20 lb dumbbell flies all day long with perfect form until my arms fall off ; sure I could do 30 or even 40 but my form would be off and I wouldn't be getting the contraction and muscle tension needed for growth.

another thing is you gotta check your self confidence. I know before I hit the gym I used to be such a negative person about myself but for no reason. Do you ever get girls actually rejecting you or commenting on your body? Most likely not, it's usually all within you and that voice inside your head telling you your fat ugly and can't do it. We all have that voice, the trick is to say NO and to prove it wrong.

Depression and working out go hand in hand, trust me. If you are depressed then you need to spend more time in the gym then anywhere else. In life there are 2 certain factors; death and taxes. But i've found a third and that is bodybuilding. only YOU can determine how big you get, how sexy you look, and overall how fit you can become. Start off with looking at yourself, top to bottom, and then figuring out if its your OUTER appearance that needs working, or if its really just a mental thing.

From your post alone I can tell you are a good guy, laid back down to earth with motivation, but there is something that is deterring you. Is it a recent break up or did someone talk negative to you? Make sure to press ALL negativity OUT and if you can't then get it out in the GYM!

Again depression is NO JOKE but if you're depressed because girls don't look at you often, then that is something you have 100% control over, and that is something in life we rarely get; total control! So start with analyzing yourself inside and out, and setting your OWN goals and mini steps first before anything. The girls, the gains, and big weights will all come after, but first you have to focus on yourself.

You got this man don't worry, I'm 25 and just now started living my fit journey. When I was 19 I was in the worst shape of my life, on drugs, no girl batted an eye at me, my self confidence was with bugs and beetles and all in all it seemed like it couldn't get better, but it did and it will. It all depends on YOU!

Thanks for your advice. It helps more than you think. I'm 5'11'' and about 135 lbs (now I got skinnier so maybe less); extremely skinny.

I guess I do have some form of depression, but it probably isn't so much because of girls. I guess it's mainly from not knowing what I wanna do with my life, and not really knowing how I can get out to the real world. But going to the gym makes it both worse and better, it seems.

I'm probably not going to go at 1 AM but I will do my best to keep thinking to focus about myself. But at the end of the day, I feel as though it's only a matter of time before I become demotivated again if I don't make much gains.

[andrewq6100]

Thanks for your advice. It helps more than you think. I'm 5'11'' and about 135 lbs (now I got skinnier so maybe less); extremely skinny.

I guess I do have some form of depression, but it probably isn't so much because of girls. I guess it's mainly from not knowing what I wanna do with my life, and not really knowing how I can get out to the real world. But going to the gym makes it both worse and better, it seems.

I'm probably not going to go at 1 AM but I will do my best to keep thinking to focus about myself. But at the end of the day, I feel as though it's only a matter of time before I become demotivated again if I don't make much gains.

hey man anytime you need motivation hit me up i'll be there!

At that height though If you put on like 30-40 lbs you would look super shredded and probably feel a little better as well! Protein time! lol
and **** not knowing what to do with life is a constant struggle brother. Just take everything in stride and live one day at a time. The real world is scary especially if you still live at home or have never branched out.

As far as real world advice all I can say is don't mess up your credit lol you need that! And yeah the gym will help relieve some tension but also try n put that same focus you use while lifting weights, into a hobby or another activity, just to see if you find another passion and to help deter some of those negative thoughts. You'll figure it out man life has a silly way of doing things as I've recently found out myself..but in the end the road is there it's just finding which road to take and how you will take it.

like i said bro don't worry about the gains or feeling demotivated, just keep looking in the mirror everyday, flexing, telling yourself your getting better, and if your not, then don't get discouraged just smile, and say I can do better! The only thing standing between you and your dreams is well, you! I look at my stomach every day and flinch because its not even close to where I wanna be, shooot.. I have like 1 ab coming through. It may be a little demotivating for sure, well more than a little lol, considering I feel I am doing everything right, but that just tells me I am obviously not doing something right, and it gears me to change my direction and focus on the positive of what I have done, and what I need to do.

everything happens in baby steps, it's not gonna happen overnight. Don't let those youtube lifters and people on here give you false hope or make you lose hope cause your not "ripped in 30 days" Remember bodybuilding and lifting is an art and your body is the rock and you are the sculptor. No great artist will rush through and all great artists have flaws in their art that get fixed. But sometimes it's those flaws that also make the art. Just keep chippin away at the rock and soon you will have a masterpiece my friend!

[kamedan]

don't lose faith ! and stick to your workout plan

[Raggi108]

just set up a diet that allows flexibility, eventually its cyclic so you should get motivation back

[Omnivium]

I was also really skinny as a teenager, one piece of advice that would have helped me a lot was EAT! Eat AT LEAST 3000 calories a day. Once you start gaining some mass you will start seeing progress and that will motivate you