cherrygarcias fat loss diary...378lbs never again!

[cherrygarcia80]

Thanks guys for checking up on me

Still down with a cough/cold so no gym this week but have eaten within the 1800cals.

My goal for the next 1 year will be to maintain the 150 pound loss so far and then can re-evaluate thereafter. Ideally want to lose 5 more pounds to go just under 220 and stay there for a year to see if the loose skin tightens up.

[anandagirl]

Doing great! Maintenance is soooo important so great job!!

[critterbug]

Just pokin' my head in to say hi. And I think of you often. Though I lurk, I check in and miss you. You're an inspiration... not just in fat losing, but in thoughts, feelings, perspectives.

So...

Hey, Cherry! Hope you're having a great time and enjoying maintenance.

[anandagirl]

Hope all is well!

[cherrygarcia80]

Confession time:-

I know I've barely been here the last 2 years but I need to confess and get back to logging regularly again because I've began slipping and don't want to go any further.

The lowest weight I saw a year ago was 220pounds....this year I wasn't doing too bad in January but since then it's creeped up and now at 252 pounds....I've gained 32 freakin pounds this year!!! (most of it in the last 3-6 months) and that's just UNACCEPTABLE!!!.

For a number of months now I look in the mirror and I haven't been happy, I have not worked out in like over a year, after having been a religious gym goer for about 4yrs! Most of the weight has come around my mid section and so I'm feeling overly self conscious once again.

Now I just feel tired all the time and my eating has just been ridiculously out of control especially the past few months because truth be told I've been job searching and it's been rough, food became my comfort once again in an unhealthy way, basically binge-eating something I thought that I had conquered a long time ago.

I've still been keto but joined the "lazy keto" bandwagon where I quit counting calories ages ago and making lots of keto desserts which quickly increase my calorie count. The past few months have been hitting 3000+cals regularly (embarassing to admit but I need to get that out in the universe) it's time to call that behaviour out and become accountable for my actions from here on out.

CURRENT ACTION STEPS:-
- As of tomorrow, start weighing and measuring everything once again, counting calories and logging daily into myfitnesspal which I haven't bothered to do in ages...infact I'll be pre-planning what I'll eat the next day...meaning getting back to serious food prep and not just winging it.
- I need to get back to working out as it's been ages I'll begin with 30mins a day, 4 times a week....doing anything for starters as long as I'm moving, and will try do home workouts and if that doesn't work beginning of January I'll be joining the millions of "new year resolutions" gym goers. My goal is to get back to regular lifting again.
- Not to be so hard on myself, I need to look in the mirror and accept that yes I've gained 32 pounds back but at least I've kept 120+ pounds off over the 2 year "maintenance" period. The fact that I'm admitting I have a problem once again and that I am taking responsibility for it and stopping any further regression now.
- And daily logging once again (or at least every 2 days), the only way I stayed on track to begin with when I started my journey was because I logged here daily. This journey is a beast and can't be done alone or in isolation, I need to acknowledge that it's the case for me. I need an accountability system in place to avoid going off the rails.

I need to rush for now, but coming back tomorrow with a more solid plan, the goal for today was to just admit that I have been having a problem with food (due to life kinda kicking me in the butt, not that it's an excuse), and to make an action plan to move forward.

[cherrygarcia80]

I've eaten way over maintenance cals the last couple of days. Today is the first day I've eaten 2000cals in a while, I would want to get it down to about 1600cals for abit. I need to do better at being accountable.

[cherrygarcia80]

After a couple of weeks of eating really horribly. I have finally gotten things back under control (great thing I managed to do so right before the holidays as that's always another excuse for mindless eating sigh!).

I've started on intermittent fasting as of yesterday (ranging for 18:6 to 20:4)...for the next one month my goal is to eat 1500cals...as my sedentary TDEE is 1900...so is a 20% deficit. If I stick to IF it should be manageable as it means I can eat more in my eating window and so stay fuller for longer.

Today is day 2 of IF and so far so good, I'm allowing myself black coffee with stevia in addition to lots of water (with pink himalayan salt) during the fasting window...I find hot water helps stave away any hunger pangs.

I'm still eating keto. Will try post my meals. Still not working out yet but at least I've finally gotten my eating under control which is basically everything.

I intend to continue with the keto IF protocol throughout Christmas and New Year festivities....for Christmas day and New years day I will let myself eat at maintenance of 1900cals but stick to the deficit during the rest of the days).


In January my church usually kicks the year off with a 21 day fast (for spiritual reasons), everyone does it how they want it whether it's skipping one meal a day or two, but usually the majority do the 6pm to 6am (in my case I'll be breaking it at 6pm doing either 18:6 or 20:4 meaning I only eat till 10pm or midnight then fast the rest).

Thereafter I think it will set a great jumpstart for my year 2020 where I intend to lose all the 30 pound regain of the past year and continue on my weightloss journey after having taken a 2yr hiatus of eating at maintenance.

I reached a whopping 257pounds on Monday after being kicked out of keto for going over my carbs the day prior, thankfully I'm back in ketosis so within afew days have dropped 6pounds of water weight that my body was carrying due to the day I ate higher carbs. Thankful to be at 251 pounds now. I never ever want to see the 250 mark ever again...I freaked out seeing that for the first time since my weightloss journey I was closer to the 300pound mark rather than 200 after having made a vow to never go back.

[cherrygarcia80]

Okay, so I'm really glad to be back on track for 2 days in a row now.

Day 2 of keto IF and eaten under 1500 calories within my 6hr eating window (IF 18:6).

Tomorrow I have a daytime party to attend, so might be a challenge eating after 6pm...but either way will stick to 1500cals.

[cherrygarcia80]

Oh wow, I'm on day 3 of my keto IF and thankful to be here because from day 3 my body adjusts to not eating till 6pm, so have woken up and have no hunger whatsoever. What usually messes it up is when I take a break like one day becomes two then three, then I find I'm off IF altogether. Currently on 18:6 window but looking to eventually move to 20:4.

So for now I eat between 6pm to midnight. Benefits after just 2 full days of IF is my skin is already clearing as my body takes a rest from eating all day from morning to nighttime which I've been doing for a while, also at least now my body has adjusted to my eating window so I'm glad. The good thing about eating my 1500cals in a 6hr window is that I stay fuller for longer and so able to go till the next day 6pm.

Still taking lots of water with a pinch of pink himalayan salt in each water bottle, and allowing myself black coffee as well with stevia in my fasting window.

It feels good to be beating my body back into submission, I hate when I get into the mode where food takes over my life instead of me taking control of it. Glad to be back in good eating habits before Christmas, otherwise I'd have gone off the rails for sure.

On Christmas day I might shift my 6hr eating window to 12noon to 6pm for my 1500cals and new years day as well. Otherwise will still to my 6pm to midnight window....might also try 3pm to 9pm to see how I feel about that too.

I can already feel my stomach begin to shrink again because now when I eat I'm getting much fuller on alot less...after a couple of weeks of mindless eating. Glad to be back in control.

I've been hovering at 251pounds for afew days now, I'm really looking forward to getting under 250 to never see that reading on the scale ever again sigh!

[Sarumyan]

Cherry, I actually remember reading you first post (around that time I had a failed log on these forums too). Unlike me you kept most of the weight off. Good job.

Lets get it done this time!

Following!

[cherrygarcia80]

Cherry, I actually remember reading you first post (around that time I had a failed log on these forums too). Unlike me you kept most of the weight off. Good job.

Lets get it done this time!

Following!

Thanks so much for the kind words Sarumyan! Yeah regain really sucks sigh! I was on a slippery slope but I'm so glad I caught it early enough, initially I was so ashamed of myself, but once I decided to accept it and move on is when I was able to get back to the journey.

And for sure this time we'll get it done once and for all!

[cherrygarcia80]

Whew! day 3 of IF is done! It feels so good to be back on track. Today went for a party, it turned out amazing as they had some smoked barbequed bacon, chicken and ribs! Had that with kale on the side. I gobbled it all up and forgot to take pics lol. Was really stuffed after that. I chose to leave the party early before drinks come out, as I don't drink anymore.

After I got home I made some dessert which is baked pumpkin chunks fried in ample butter on a pan with some pumpkin pie spice and added stevia for sweetness....I've been having that for a quick dessert the past week or so. It tastes amazing (or at least to me it does lol!), like a quicker version of crustless pumpkin pie. I also added some cream in it as well, I could eat that everyday forever lol. Then had some tea with ample cream as a night cap.

Total cals for the day amounted to 1400. Glad to see after just 3 days of IF I'm getting super full on my allotted calories spread out in afew hours of my eating window.

Still not yet working out, I might have to save that for January, not looking forward to doing the walk of shame back to the gym after not having stepped in there for over a year. Feeling abit self conscious about having added some weight back but will have to get over it and just get back to it and focus on me and my health and not what others think.

[cherrygarcia80]

So today I decided to take a break from my regular IF schedule, I'm thinking maybe twice a week can take a break and eat at maintenance (1900cals) , then eat my 1500cals the rest of the days.

Only problem is I ate 2500cals sigh! I find that when I allow myself to eat freely during the day I keep just waltzing into the kitchen/fridge to see what's good to eat. However on the IF days I'm able to keep things under control. So will need to strike a balance on the 2 days off and eat only till maintenance and not above.

Tomorrow will be back to IF at 1500cals and Tuesday as well...then on Christmas day will allow myself to eat at maintenance.

I've also realized my eating habits are still tied to my emotions, today it hit me that once again I'm single during the holidays and that kinda sucks especially when everyone else is all coupled up, would be nice to have my own person. With that said at least our family is close so at least I won't be alone as there will be lot's of family get-togethers coming up in the next week so that will be a good distraction and will be great to spend time with them.

I also kinda find it really sad that these forums are not what they used to be, back in the day when I started on my journey these forums are what helped keep me going day in and day out, not just for accountability but for the community spirit...it seems loads of people dropped off, I'm guessing forums are no longer popular with everyone switching to their own personal Instagram/******** pages.

I find it sad because this was the one place I could vent and people would actually understand as they'd be on the exact same journey I was on and we'd all encourage each other to keep on going. It's nice to see the very few and far between regulars who are left.

I'm hoping to keep hanging on here for a while for accountability purposes...I find that when I'm away it's so easy to just eat like crap if I have no-one/nowhere to be accountable to.

[cherrygarcia80]

Oh wow, so this week has not at all gone how I thought it would. I've ended up over-eating on Christmas day and boxing day. Today have reeled things in abit.

It seems when I'm doing IF is when I'm able to stay disciplined...hoping to get back onto it next week, (18:6 or 20:4) seemed to be working great for the days I was consistent on it.

Posting some random keto meals of the week.

Keto Christmas breakfast


6hr slow cooked pork shoulder for Christmas


6hr slow cooked pulled pork shoulder


Grilled Veges



Keto Crustless Pumpkin pie



Chaffle (a keto cheese waffle)

[cherrygarcia80]

Today I ate at maintenance, so I'm really glad about that, gradually reeling things back in. I'd much rather eat at maintenance for another week (to get over the new year festivities) then thereafter get back on my deficit rather than try to force eating in a deficit over the holidays.

My church starts a 21 day fast from 6th Jan (for spiritual reasons) which will work out perfectly for me, they usually do an eating window of 6pm to 6am (12 hour eating window), but in my case will make it a 4-6hr eating window for the 21 days then see how I feel about it, if it is sustainable in the long run, I usually feel optimal when on IF and would want to make it a permanent lifestyle.

[cherrygarcia80]

Have started on IF, 20:4 for the most part and some days will be 18:6...will see how it goes. Today have eaten 1800cals...my target from now henceforth will be 1500cals.

[Runway37]

Have started on IF, 20:4 for the most part and some days will be 18:6...will see how it goes. Today have eaten 1800cals...my target from now henceforth will be 1500cals.

No idea how IF works on keto, but I do an 8/16 and it does a great job cutting down cravings for me.

[GandyJay]

Keep up the good work Cherry, good to see you back on the logs again