Forever Cutting (My Road to 10%)

[TheNormalMan]

I don't feel like spilling my entire life story in this log about how I came to be at the day I am today. Suffice it to say, it's not where I envisioned myself 8 years ago and leave it at that.

That's how long I've been fighting my weight and myself. The last 8 years have been a vicious cycle of more ups and downs than I ever care to think about.

Let's just say, that every man has a limit to how many times he can endure watching the same thing happen over and over again. That's me now.

Mentally, I seem to have this barrier that when I get down to around to 200 pounds, some wall forms around me that makes me want to stop striving to be successful.

I have absolutely no idea where it comes from or why it happens, but this has happened to me multiple times when I've lost large amounts of weight.

Maybe I'm afraid to be lean or athletic and that the fear of my mind wants to keep me hidden by staying fat. I'm sure other people can relate to that feeling in one way or another.

But I will break that cycle this year and take my body to a new level it has never been before. This is the promise I am making to myself now.

This is the final leg of my journey and will without a doubt be the longest portion of my journey.

In this journey, I will have to learn to live with myself, with who I am and who I'm striving to become.

I will need to learn to accept who I am, what my strengths and weaknesses are, and how I can the best life I can for myself.

No longer am I setting deadlines for fat loss, muscle gains, or hitting a certain arbitrary number that means nothing to me.

I will use all the knowledge I've obtained over the years, follow the things that work/don't work for me and never give up on becoming a better person each and every day.



For now though, I still do have some short term goals I am looking to hit for personal reasons.

First short term goal is to get back under 200 pounds again and prove to myself that I can finally break through this mental barrier that has haunted me for nearly a decade now.

I will be eating maintenance calories until September 15 so I will not be dropping much weight/fat if anything the next couple weeks.

After this, I am going to be starting another 4-6 week cut of RFL as a Category 2 dieter.

RFL/PSMF clicks very well for me and I was highly successful while on it, so I'm going to continue to use what has worked for me.

As I continue to get leaner and drop more bodyfat, I'm going to be doing shorter and shorter cycles on this.

I also need to find another dedicated lifting program and follow that since I've just been doing basic full body routines the last few months.

This is my time, my year, and I can't wait to see what I can do.



I will be updating everyday if possible, recording all my workouts (to track my progress), and posting food logs to ensure that I stay on track no matter what protocol I'm following.

[LixeMGT]

Also trying to cut to 10%, Hopefully we both reach our goal. I also have had mental barriers and I'm finally just gonna fight through them and be the person who I want to be. Good luck!

[Gen1GT]

First in!

edit: Damnit!

[LixeMGT]

First in!

edit: Damnit!

Close

[GravyVeins]

THE FINAL CHAPTER.








Spoiler: Neo dies and the matrix is rebooted.

[Prestonion]

Race you to sub 200 - should be similar levels by time you start rfl round 2

Go for it!!

[TheNormalMan]

Also trying to cut to 10%, Hopefully we both reach our goal. I also have had mental barriers and I'm finally just gonna fight through them and be the person who I want to be. Good luck!

It's going to be a lifelong battle, but hopefully I can finally start to overcome some of my demons this time around.

Thanks for dropping in!

First in!

edit: Damnit!

Here we go again!

THE FINAL CHAPTER.








Spoiler: Neo dies and the matrix is rebooted.

No blue pills for me.

Race you to sub 200 - should be similar levels by time you start rfl round 2

Go for it!!

Get it man. Hope you get there too.

I'm just going at my own pace now. No more tight deadlines or crazy goals.

Not going down the path of all or nothing this time.

[TheNormalMan]

September 5, 2014

Thoughts

Did pretty well my first real day back today. Felt good to throw some weights around again at the gym and finally eat a normal amount of maintenance calories.

I think I'm going to struggle with my protein intake without taking some kind of protein supplement, but I'm going to try to avoid that during maintenance.

Don't have much left and would like to have some around for when I start my next round of RFL in a week and a half.

Going to just stick the fullbody routine I've been doing for the next week and half and when I start RFL again, am going to adopt one of the Beginner 5x5 programs.

My only complaint with those programs is that most of them don't include a few exercises that I really enjoy doing such as push-ups and dips.

But also don't want to hinder or slow my progress down by not following the recommended routine. Will just have to see how it goes most likely.



Workout

60 Minutes Full Body at Gym



Nutrition

[TheNormalMan]

September 6, 2014

Thoughts

Definitely need to work harder on lowering my fat intake and increasing my protein intake as well for the next week.

Not sure if it was because of RFL that my tastebuds have kind of been in overdrive the last few days, but that's the way it's been seeming to me.

Still in my calorie range so that is good, but just need to work harder on controlling my intake a little bit better.

I'm more concerned about just staying in the calorie range and getting at least close to my macronutrient goals for the next week and a half.

Caprica was awesome enough to make before/after photos of me from my 12 week RFL cut log. I will be using those as my starting photos here and will try to update about every 4-6 weeks or so.





Workout

45 Minutes Full Body at Gym



Nutrition

[Gen1GT]

Haha, great gif Jason!

[Compy386]

How did this thread exist for 2 days without me seeing it?

Oh well. In on this. Go get 'em TNM

[GravyVeins]

Diet looks good so far. I'm curious to see what changes you see while eating maintenance for a while and lifting more.

I assume you are mixing the popcorn chicken into your salad. Have you tried the frozen, pre-grilled chicken yet? You can pretty much just microwave it.

[caprica6]

if you watch closely Normal twerks at the end. :P

[TheNormalMan]

Haha, great gif Jason!

Thanks! Cap did a great job again with it.

Hopefully can have an equally impressive one to throw together in a couple months again as well.

How did this thread exist for 2 days without me seeing it?

Oh well. In on this. Go get 'em TNM

Thanks Compy.

Always glad to have you along for the ride as well.

Hopefully can continue to ride this success out for awhile longer.

Diet looks good so far. I'm curious to see what changes you see while eating maintenance for a while and lifting more.

I assume you are mixing the popcorn chicken into your salad. Have you tried the frozen, pre-grilled chicken yet? You can pretty much just microwave it.

The popcorn chicken is going into my salad.

I had a few frozen bags sitting in my freezer from when it was really cheap a couple months ago and I was waiting until my maintenance to eat it, lol.

That pre-grilled chicken is great and actually got an amazing steal on it too back when I was on RFL.

It's normally like 3-4 bucks per bag for only 6 ounces, but the QFC I shopped at had like 25 bags or so marked down to a buck each. So I cleaned em out.

I'm on a moderately tight budget now with food so I just trim and cook my own chicken breast. Can get it for 2-2.50 most of the time depending on where I shop.

if you watch closely Normal twerks at the end. :P

Twerk, twerk, twerk...

Must be lack of carbs in those photos.

[TheNormalMan]

September 7, 2014

Thoughts

Still need to work on eating less fat in my daily calorie intake. Actually a lot harder than I thought it was going to be.

Will work harder on that this week and try to increase my carb intake as well since that's the most important during maintenance.

Small steps at least. Will do better.



Workout

Rest Day



Nutrition

[wilsonthecat]

good luck with your goals I wish you well,reading your log has inspired me tonight.

[Gen1GT]

Yeah, that's too much fat, even for maintenance. I'm not a fan of eating fat as a percentage of calories. Your body is happy with a particular amount of fat a day, which would be less than 90g/day for sure. Your increased maintenance calories should be low-medium GI carbs, but I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir.

[kureransu]

Yeah, that's too much fat, even for maintenance. I'm not a fan of eating fat as a percentage of calories. Your body is happy with a particular amount of fat a day, which would be less than 90g/day for sure. Your increased maintenance calories should be low-medium GI carbs, but I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir.

actually if he did .45 per lb he'd be at 94g. that's 658 cals out of 2500 calories. he would be fine even at 100g if is doing 2700

[TheNormalMan]

good luck with your goals I wish you well,reading your log has inspired me tonight.

Thanks for dropping in man. Glad you were able to get some motivation from my journal. We're all in this together.

Good luck sticking with your plan. We'll all get there.

Yeah, that's too much fat, even for maintenance. I'm not a fan of eating fat as a percentage of calories. Your body is happy with a particular amount of fat a day, which would be less than 90g/day for sure. Your increased maintenance calories should be low-medium GI carbs, but I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir.

actually if he did .45 per lb he'd be at 94g. that's 658 cals out of 2500 calories. he would be fine even at 100g if is doing 2700

All the goal numbers that I have inputted into MFP are based on calculations Lyle has at the back of his RFL book when moving back to maintenance.

The numbers are a few grams off for all the macros since MFP wouldn't let me put in the exact numbers, I had to round them up or down a few grams.

Going to start eating more cottage cheese again since it's an easy way to get more protein in without increasing calories that much overall.

Biggest problem is just keeping my fat to the values I need to eat at and getting my carbs up again.

Increasing carbs is the most important during maintenance since those are the most important for helping to reset hormones after extended periods of dieting.

[TheNormalMan]

Week 1 Maintenance

Weight: 212.2#

Only put on 2.8 pounds after three days of eating way too liberally and then four days of adequately following my maintenance macros/calories.

Pretty happy with that giving what happened I transitioned from a PSMF to maintenance. Put on nearly 10 pounds the last time I tried to make a transition.

Hoping to maintain around here or maybe only put on another 1-2 pounds this week while eating at maintenance.

Then I'm going to start another 6 week run of RFL as a cat. 2 dieter. I think I'm down to 25%, but it's hard to say (to me at least).

Lyle recommends that if you're borderline between a couple of dieting categories to go with the lower one.

[TheNormalMan]

September 8, 2014

Thoughts

Nutrition was slightly better today macronutrient wise. Still not 100% where it needs to be, but it's still tougher adjusting my eating habits than I thought it would be.

At least my carb intake was better today since that's one of the most important things to be focusing on during maintenance.

The best part about this next round of RFL is that I'll get a 5 hour refeed each week which I'm looking forward to more than a free meal.

Will get protein up and above 150 tomorrow at the very least. More cottage cheese!



Workout

60 Minute Full Body at Gym



Nutrition

[Gen1GT]

Week 1 Maintenance

Weight: 212.2#

Only put on 2.8 pounds after three days of eating way too liberally and then four days of adequately following my maintenance macros/calories.

Pretty happy with that giving what happened I transitioned from a PSMF to maintenance. Put on nearly 10 pounds the last time I tried to make a transition.

Hoping to maintain around here or maybe only put on another 1-2 pounds this week while eating at maintenance.

Then I'm going to start another 6 week run of RFL as a cat. 2 dieter. I think I'm down to 25%, but it's hard to say (to me at least).

Lyle recommends that if you're borderline between a couple of dieting categories to go with the lower one.

Try not to focus on the transitional scale numbers. Glycogen and water can swing you 5-10 lbs either way. BB.com sells bodyfat calipers for like $5 if you need it. LOL

[kureransu]

September 8, 2014

Thoughts

Nutrition was slightly better today macronutrient wise. Still not 100% where it needs to be, but it's still tougher adjusting my eating habits than I thought it would be.

At least my carb intake was better today since that's one of the most important things to be focusing on during maintenance.

The best part about this next round of RFL is that I'll get a 5 hour refeed each week which I'm looking forward to more than a free meal.

Will get protein up and above 150 tomorrow at the very least. More cottage cheese!



Workout

60 Minute Full Body at Gym



Nutrition

[IMG]http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q32/TheNormalMan/Fall%202014%20Cut/Food09-08_zps709b2d70.jpg[IMG]

Hey i don't know if you saw this, but I'm doing Cat 1. My protein intake is like 255, and depending how much income you have for lean meats, i can toss you a few ideas. My morning omelette is 380 cals and 78g of protein.

[TheNormalMan]

Try not to focus on the transitional scale numbers. Glycogen and water can swing you 5-10 lbs either way. BB.com sells bodyfat calipers for like $5 if you need it. LOL

I'm not focused on the scale numbers. I'm actually very happy with one week at maintenance.

I started my cut the day after Easter with PSMF as well and did that for six weeks. I took a week off and put on almost 10 pounds after coming off that.

Now granted, I let myself run unchecked for a week in regards to diet, much worse than I did the first couple days of last week, but only a 3 pound gain after a week of carbs is pretty damn good.

Hoping to keep myself in this ballpark area and jump back into RFL again between 212-214 or so come next week.

Hey i don't know if you saw this, but I'm doing Cat 1. My protein intake is like 255, and depending how much income you have for lean meats, i can toss you a few ideas. My morning omelette is 380 cals and 78g of protein.

Very cool man. Did not know you had started RFL as well. Do you have a log? Or are you just tracking it in one of the transformation threads? Would love to follow along.

My income has some flexibility and I typically get my chicken breasts for $2/pound. That unfortunately makes up the bulk of what I eat while on RFL.

The rest of the variety in my diet just comes from hunting deals week to week at my local grocery stores and stretching what I can.

But I'd love to hear some more meals for ideas on RFL. TBH, the thought of another six weeks of nothing but grilled chicken and salads is kind of unappealing.

[TheNormalMan]

2 Week Maintenance Update

This is a somewhat long post of mine that I just feel like I want/need to get off my chest and from my thoughts.

Feel free to skip this if you follow along with me at all as it's just ramblings of a jumbled mind that is confused on who it is and what it is looking for in this life.

My two weeks of maintenance weren't really much of a success but it wasn't really that bad of a disaster either.

But what did it pave the way for was one of my deepest fears coming to light for the first time in illuminating clarity.

That fact is that I have much deeper seated food-related issues than I initially thought I did in regards to eating a balanced lifestyle when not dieting.

For me, it's always been easy to cut. Cut calories, increase workouts, do for "x" amount of time. I've always been good if not amazingly great at this.

Yet in all these of years of losing and gaining weight, I've never once hit my goal or actually even been within spitting distance of it.

I want to say that maybe 20% is the lowest bodyfat I've ever gotten down too and for all I know, it still might have even been higher than that.

For once though, I feel motivated enough to actually stick this cut out long enough to see my longterm goal become realized whatever bodyfat, physique, or weight that ends up being.

The thing that scares me to death is that I'm going to fail yet again once I reach that point. All I've ever known is resounding failure when my willpower runs out or I hit a short/moderate term goal.

Obsessively tracking calories wears me out. I can't stand that part of dieting and I think I'm done writing down every little thing I eat.

This isn't even because I haven't had success dieting or wasn't able to reach a certain goal within a certain time frame.

I just get worn out writing down everything little I eat and meticulously counting anything and everything I do.

Maybe if I ever chose to pursue some type of real bodybuilding one day, then that level of counting will become mandatory, but for now, it just seems to be causing me extra stress and I'm worn out.

This isn't me quitting or wanting to quit in the least. I am extremely motivated right now.

Possibly more motivated to work hard towards my goals than I've ever been in a very long time.

But with that motivation comes an overwhelming fear of failure that once again, I will fail to meet my standards and screw everything up again as I have so many times in the past.

For once in my life, I think I'm going to admit that I have a problem with food in my life and start going to some group support classes.

I'm not even sure what type of groups I would go too, but I can't lie to myself anymore and say that I'm in control when I feel like I'm a vortex of failure waiting to happen at any moment.

That said, I am still starting my 2nd RFL cut starting tomorrow.

I will be running this one for at least six weeks, same as last time, with a few small modifications.

Will try to update more on my cutting information tomorrow.

This is just the beginning for myself and I will conquer these demons I have no matter what it takes. No more backing down.

[kureransu]

I read all of that. May i suggest ditching RFL in it's entirety this time?

It seems to me that you use it as a crutch to give you a sense of control. Perhaps we use this log as a way to find a balance of food. I don't count either. I do weigh and measure though. The great thing about using variety in RFL was that I got used to different varieties of food and learned about them. I posted how i just snacked too much is what i learned from rfl.

I didn't have a online log or track. today is the last day, but i'm pretty much done. I got down 2 194 from 207, and after refeeding i'm at 198. So a total of 9 lbs in 2 weeks, and I'm completely content with that. but back to what i was saying.

I hate counting cals. Pretty much what is key for me is MAKING 90% OF ALL MY DISHES. After a while of tracking all of them and such, You'll have a huge menu of dishes to prepare that you already know the general macros for and you can eat freely. So it's nice that when weigh does get out of the like area, you have a set of meals you cna string together to get it back down. I swear to you it works so well.

If you go back to rfl, i understand, but I feel like you're relying on that a bit too much. RFL proves YOU can control your relationship with food, you just have to find a desire to do it besides following a book.

Now i'm off to make stuffed cheeseburgers (96/4 beef, stuffed with fat free cheese, mushrooms, and spinach), a salad, and sweet potato fries.

[tara19]

Honestly.. it sounds like you have anorexia nervosa.
Maybe try reading through this thread: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=149942713
There are lovely people who can offer you the advice that I don't currently have.

[Gen1GT]

Jason, I totally know how you feel. Two years ago after I won that weight loss competition, going from 396 to 324, I let myself go after the competition. I got up over 400 lbs, and every single morning I would wake up determined to make the change, and then every single day I would sabotage myself and eat garbage. I got to the point where my attitude was, “What the f**k is the point? Every time I try this, I fail, and I make things worse. Maybe the whole self-improvement industry is full of crap, and people are just supposed to be who they are, and nothing can change that.”

It sounds odd, but this time around it all started when I was watching Game of Arms. I’ve always been a natural arm wrestler, and rarely got beaten (I have long arms, and naturally muscular). So I was like, “You know what … I’m going to give arm wrestling a try.” So I started going to the gym to work on my “strongman” physique, especially as it relates to arm wrestling. This resulted in my finding Bodybuilding.com, where I found the thread on calculating macros. I’m a math nerd, so I ate it up, next thing you know I was on a “diet” as well as my weight-training. I started reading all the transformation articles in the Motivation section of the forum, and read through the entire Fat to Fit transformation thread (like 210 pages long), and ramped up my motivation. Last month, I enrolled in an online course in sports nutrition and completed it in three weeks (did I mention I’m a nerd?). I plan on starting a business as a nutritionist, and I’m going to take another 1000-hour nutrition program at another school.

My point is that this time, I’m All-In baby! Besides all of the common sense reasons I SHOULD HAVE CARED about my health and didn’t (my health, my wife, my children, my happiness), I now have [i]purpose[i/] to my journey. I can’t be taken seriously as a nutritionist when I’m 420 lbs, or even 275 lbs! I have to get ripped, or it’s a dead-end street. And believe it or not, fat arm wrestlers can be disadvantaged … I’m not as strong as the 230 lb + heavyweights, so I need to both get strong and down below 230lbs, where I have a better chance of winning against guys who aren’t monsters. Also a fat gut prevents you from getting the leverage you need close to the table.

Sorry, this is me going on about my motivation, but perhaps you need to engage in a goal other than to “get in shape” or “lose weight.” Change your career to a personal trainer. Get into a sport, take it seriously and aim to be the best, like sub-200 lb power lifter, winning the Clydesdale class in a triathlon or whatever. It could be anything … what do you love or want to try? Rowing? Maybe learn parkour? It doesn’t matter what it is, just get involved and dedicate yourself to it….

[TheNormalMan]

I read all of that. May i suggest ditching RFL in it's entirety this time?

It seems to me that you use it as a crutch to give you a sense of control. Perhaps we use this log as a way to find a balance of food. I don't count either. I do weigh and measure though. The great thing about using variety in RFL was that I got used to different varieties of food and learned about them. I posted how i just snacked too much is what i learned from rfl.

I didn't have a online log or track. today is the last day, but i'm pretty much done. I got down 2 194 from 207, and after refeeding i'm at 198. So a total of 9 lbs in 2 weeks, and I'm completely content with that. but back to what i was saying.

I hate counting cals. Pretty much what is key for me is MAKING 90% OF ALL MY DISHES. After a while of tracking all of them and such, You'll have a huge menu of dishes to prepare that you already know the general macros for and you can eat freely. So it's nice that when weigh does get out of the like area, you have a set of meals you cna string together to get it back down. I swear to you it works so well.

If you go back to rfl, i understand, but I feel like you're relying on that a bit too much. RFL proves YOU can control your relationship with food, you just have to find a desire to do it besides following a book.

Now i'm off to make stuffed cheeseburgers (96/4 beef, stuffed with fat free cheese, mushrooms, and spinach), a salad, and sweet potato fries.

Damn those burgers sound good. Pictures would be great!

You are right though. This cycle on RFL proved that I can control myself with food, but the problem as I see it unless I have a goal set, my control becomes much tougher to maintain.

I'm afraid that if I don't continue on with my cycle of RFL now like I planned, I will find myself spinning my wheels and making no progress yet again.

I'm done counting calories and meticulously logging everything though. It just wears me out too much.

I've already done RFL for 12 weeks and I ate almost the same things everyday, so the next 6 weeks will be just as simple as doing what I've already done again.

Thanks for dropping in. Always appreciate it.

Honestly.. it sounds like you have anorexia nervosa.
Maybe try reading through this thread: http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showth...hp?t=149942713
There are lovely people who can offer you the advice that I don't currently have.

I'm honestly not sure what I do have, but I do appreciate the input.

It's not weight gain I'm afraid of or eating which seems to be the defining characters of Anorexia. My biggest problem is learning to control my intake.

My biggest problem if we're putting lables on things is problem Binge Eating Disorder since that's what I struggle with.

When I start in on calorie dense foods and sugary/fatty foods, I find it extremely hard to stop/control myself which is why I do so bad when I spend time with friends or family since food is often involved.

Jason, I totally know how you feel. Two years ago after I won that weight loss competition, going from 396 to 324, I let myself go after the competition. I got up over 400 lbs, and every single morning I would wake up determined to make the change, and then every single day I would sabotage myself and eat garbage. I got to the point where my attitude was, “What the f**k is the point? Every time I try this, I fail, and I make things worse. Maybe the whole self-improvement industry is full of crap, and people are just supposed to be who they are, and nothing can change that.”

It sounds odd, but this time around it all started when I was watching Game of Arms. I’ve always been a natural arm wrestler, and rarely got beaten (I have long arms, and naturally muscular). So I was like, “You know what … I’m going to give arm wrestling a try.” So I started going to the gym to work on my “strongman” physique, especially as it relates to arm wrestling. This resulted in my finding Bodybuilding.com, where I found the thread on calculating macros. I’m a math nerd, so I ate it up, next thing you know I was on a “diet” as well as my weight-training. I started reading all the transformation articles in the Motivation section of the forum, and read through the entire Fat to Fit transformation thread (like 210 pages long), and ramped up my motivation. Last month, I enrolled in an online course in sports nutrition and completed it in three weeks (did I mention I’m a nerd?). I plan on starting a business as a nutritionist, and I’m going to take another 1000-hour nutrition program at another school.

My point is that this time, I’m All-In baby! Besides all of the common sense reasons I SHOULD HAVE CARED about my health and didn’t (my health, my wife, my children, my happiness), I now have [i]purpose[i/] to my journey. I can’t be taken seriously as a nutritionist when I’m 420 lbs, or even 275 lbs! I have to get ripped, or it’s a dead-end street. And believe it or not, fat arm wrestlers can be disadvantaged … I’m not as strong as the 230 lb + heavyweights, so I need to both get strong and down below 230lbs, where I have a better chance of winning against guys who aren’t monsters. Also a fat gut prevents you from getting the leverage you need close to the table.

Sorry, this is me going on about my motivation, but perhaps you need to engage in a goal other than to “get in shape” or “lose weight.” Change your career to a personal trainer. Get into a sport, take it seriously and aim to be the best, like sub-200 lb power lifter, winning the Clydesdale class in a triathlon or whatever. It could be anything … what do you love or want to try? Rowing? Maybe learn parkour? It doesn’t matter what it is, just get involved and dedicate yourself to it….

That's awesome man. Glad you've found the thing regarding fitness and nutrition that completely clicked for you.

I'm still trying to find my reason for doing this beyond simply losing weight or wanting to get down to a certain bodyfat percentage.

And I've actually been a certified Personal Trainer for almost five years now since I graduated from college back in 2008.

I spent a couple years working at large commercial gyms and then trained on my own for awhile, but I just lost interest in the personal training aspect of fitness.

My passion will always be the health and fitness field in one form or another so I'm exploring other options at the moment for what could really spark my interest.

I'm looking to get into online fitness writing in one form or another so that's why I've been spending a lot more back on this website again just trying to get back into being more active with people and honing my writing skills and knowledge.

At the moment too, I'm also working on joining volunteer firefighting and EMT programs since being a firefighter is also a dream/passion of mine I've had for a long time now.

That's part of the reason I've been so hellbent on cutting weight fast recently was to help get myself in shape for some classes I might need to take later this year. Will know more on that later.

Thanks for everyone dropping in!

[Compy386]

Well if you're still planning to eat the same thing every day, then there really is far less need to meticulously count everything.

I wish I knew what to tell you man. You're like the most hardcore dood I've seen in dis here LF logz. I'd tend to agree with kureransu tho, does it have to be RFL? Just eat 1800-2000 like I do! That's easysauce compared to what you're used to lol.
Anyway, if you've made up your mind ain't nobody going to convince you of anything.